Flight disrupting assholes Thread of Shame.

[MAUFRAIS 6739]

A holier than thou harpie in the late sixties and early 70’s who sang Christian, gospel songs and saw herself as a warrior against the hippie culture.  Her mainstream gig was hawking orange juice (how wholesome!).  She crusaded against the gays and would have fit in just fine today in the MAGA world.  Her catch line was “A day without orange juice is like a day without sunshine!”, which may have been a musical jingle too…
.

 

It’s a David Allan Coe song you philistine.

[Cheeseweasel 26439]

9 hours ago, MAUFRAIS said:

It’s a David Allan Coe song you philistine.

*Edger Allan Poe

@wood's wife

[Steel Shank 9552]

I've got a little sunshine Anita can put her lips around.

[Your Mom 4968]

On 9/4/2023 at 5:56 PM, TheStoicPaisano said:

 

[High Plains Drifter 11186]

On 9/6/2023 at 9:35 PM, TwiceHorn said:

One of you degenerates posted this somewhere else and it may be one of the greatest things I've ever seen.

 

 

The surprise appearance of Black Phillip at the end is the chef's kiss.

 

 

[Handcruser 2815]

On a plane and nobody has shit everywhere.

Yet.

[Longhornstampede 3213]

Can dogs be included in this thread? Actually, I think it's pretty damn funny

https://www.facebook.com/100063573969184/posts/pfbid0Pm2KXVDBcdtqYWwgYYBgWUWuZm55T6zfMz4wWtwYGmX8wN3C58wJVVc2tUj2CmNwl/?mibextid=CDWPTG

[gyroprotagonist 2597]

more of a CSB but on the flight to Birmingham Friday, we are all seated about to leave the gate and then 2 LEO with something like "drug overdose unit" on their shirts  come storming down the aisle, but then returned empty handed a few minutes later.  missed my chance at getting on a tiktok video i guess.

[BillyGoatHill 4420]

"Instagram famous" getting kicked off pre-flight from coach....😂

(No matter where you go, no matter how self absorbed pretty you think you  are....there is someone, somewhere, that is tired of your shit. In this case, the flight attendant) GTFOH. Buh-bye.

 

[Cheeseweasel 26439]

[956 Worldwide 35592]

[Steel Shank 9552]

I like my women spirited.

[Brisketexan 106885]

3 minutes ago, Steel Shank said:

I like my women spirited.

Yeah, well, I like my women Jet Blued....or something.  Maybe I like them Lufthansa'd.  That sounds more interesting.

[Neonmoon 38130]

Great. Now delaying flights and getting kicked off planes to get more social media attention is a thing 

Still rooting for the meteor 

[Bevo 13870]

I hate flying these days. A few weeks ago, I was on United flying from Spokane to Austin via San Francisco. In San Francisco, I went to the gate agent and asked him if he could sit my wife and me together. He said the flight was full and I had a low fare ticket so he couldn't do anything, "but, I see that you have a carry-on. There is a $35 charge for carry-ons. How would you like to pay?" What a cock. And pretty hard not to say something back.

I think from now on, I'll fly Southwest or first class and try my best to avoid any conversations with airline or airport personnel. Such a beating.

[Gatorubet 30711]

On United, any fare (even normal economy - but not the basic economy fare) allows a free carry-on and a free personal bag like a briefcase.  
i’m not sure if a no yearly fee branded United credit card waves that fee or not
 

[Bevo 13870]

24 minutes ago, Gatorubet said:

On United, any fare (even normal economy - but not the basic economy fare) allows a free carry-on and a free personal bag like a briefcase.  
i’m not sure if a no yearly fee branded United credit card waves that fee or not
 

Well, on top of all that, I paid to check my wife's bag in Spokane so between the two of us, we had a small carry-on in case they lost our luggage. And this was mid-route in San Francisco.

I need to give them a call anyway. I had a few hundred thousand miles on Continental that don't appear on my statements anymore. If I can get them back, I'll take a trip somewhere and then try to avoid them in the future. Unfortunately, American which is the most common carrier out of Austin isn't any better.

Edited September 19, 2023 by Bevo

[royiv 9782]

31 minutes ago, Gatorubet said:

On United, any fare (even normal economy - but not the basic economy fare) allows a free carry-on and a free personal bag like a briefcase.  
i’m not sure if a no yearly fee branded United credit card waves that fee or not
 

I'm guessing he had a basic economy fare.

[elfenix 34748]

[YGIFS 19458]

Sounds like from the report, somebody definitely gave her box the ole' 27 on the reverse.  And they both "completed" 

[Nicole44 22309]

I guarantee it was an adult that shit on the floor. Airlines are becoming the Walmart people of the sky.

[YGIFS 19458]

We now go live to Chief Communications Officer for EasyJet, Mr. Alexander, as he addresses two reporters on the matter:

 

 

[Nicole44 22309]

Holy shit. This is like a surly airlines.

Edited October 16, 2023 by Nicole44

[SuperSport 1367]

This obviously fits here, but might merit its own thread given the possible industry repercussions...

https://viewfromthewing.com/pilot-attempts-to-shut-down-engines-of-alaska-airlines-flight-while-in-mid-air/

 

 

[crash_davis 23469]

"You are serving them drinks, but I'm white."

 

[SuperSport 1367]

On 10/23/2023 at 9:53 AM, SuperSport said:

This obviously fits here, but might merit its own thread given the possible industry repercussions...

https://viewfromthewing.com/pilot-attempts-to-shut-down-engines-of-alaska-airlines-flight-while-in-mid-air/

 

 

Possibly on 'shrooms. Enjoy prison, fuckhead...

 

 

[High Plains Drifter 11186]

 

Keep it up assholes. It won't be long now until alcohol is banned on flights. And breathalyzers before boarding.

 

[High Plains Drifter 11186]

On 9/18/2023 at 4:44 PM, 956 Worldwide said:

 

fake tits, fake lips, fake ass, probably fake cheekbones.

Have at it, bro. I'll stick to my sex doll, wait did I say that out loud?

 

[YGIFS 19458]

When I was in college, amongst many Dead shows, I took 'shrooms.  Enjoyed the hell outta the show.  And in the parking lot, on Shakedown Street, I bought one of those posters that had 100 pictographs with each little drawing deal representing a Dead song in form.  And as much as I knew their catalogue, I didn't get the vast majority of them.  But we took some more substances that night and I suddenly "got" all 100.  I thought I'd seen straight through to the center of the universe after about 6-8 hours of tripping.  

Little did I know there was a 'Final Boss' after 40 hours.  Where you see yourself crashing a full-sized commercial aircraft into the Sierras while "Fire on the Mountain" plays in your head.  

Sorry my fellow men of faith.  We are absolutely living in a computer simulation at this point.  I can't bring bottled water onto a passenger jet.  But you can eat a KFC bowl-sized serving of mushrooms and get into the cockpit while telling the crew, "It's totally cool, I slept in a Holiday Inn Express last week.  Which was also the last time slept, period.  You know what they say---12 hours from bottle to throttle.  And 40 hours from Spores Composed to Doors Closed."  

[MonkeyDoughnut 10803]

18 minutes ago, High Plains Drifter said:

 

Keep it up assholes. It won't be long now until alcohol is banned on flights. And breathalyzers before boarding.

 

Southwest looking to move things along with that starting in 2024....

"Members with A-List Preferred status will receive up to two complimentary premium drinks per flight."

[Welshy 914]

1 hour ago, High Plains Drifter said:

 

Keep it up assholes. It won't be long now until alcohol is banned on flights. And breathalyzers before boarding.

 

Not in first, surly

[atomheartbevo 90641]

3 hours ago, SuperSport said:

Possibly on 'shrooms

“You need to cuff me right now or it's going to be bad," Emerson told a flight attendant, according to the criminal complaint. 

"The officer and Emerson talked about the use of psychedelic mushrooms and Emerson said it was his first time taking mushrooms," the complaint added.

Emerson told police and medical personnel that he had "consumed 'magic mushrooms' approximately 48 hours prior to the incident on the plane," the affidavit says. 
———-

 

We’ve all been there.

[Schulz2.0 29280]

23 minutes ago, atomheartbevo said:

“You need to cuff me right now or it's going to be bad," Emerson told a flight attendant, according to the criminal complaint. 

"The officer and Emerson talked about the use of psychedelic mushrooms and Emerson said it was his first time taking mushrooms," the complaint added.

Emerson told police and medical personnel that he had "consumed 'magic mushrooms' approximately 48 hours prior to the incident on the plane," the affidavit says. 
———-

 

We’ve all been there.

[YGIFS 19458]

21 minutes ago, Schulz2.0 said:

Gate attendant, "Say man, that was like $80 worth of mushrooms of mine that you just ate.  So you can just pay me back when you can."

DUUUUUUUUDE!  

[Nicole44 22309]

Since we don’t have a flight thread of badasses I thought I’d put this here. RIP to that beautiful courageous lady. 
 

Full text of the Tweet:

Neerja Bhanot was a 22-year-old flight attendant working on Pan Am Flight 73 when it was hijacked by terrorists during a layover in 1986. Soon after taking control, the terrorists killed an Indian-American traveler and discarded his body outside the plane. They ordered Bhanot to gather the passengers' passports to single out Americans. However, she concealed the identities of the 43 Americans on the flight by stashing their passports under seats and discarding others. After a tense 17-hour standoff, the hijackers began shooting and setting off explosives. Bhanot bravely opened the plane's doors, and rather than escaping herself, she helped passengers evacuate. Tragically, she lost her life while shielding three American children from gunfire. One of the kids she safeguarded grew up to become an airline captain, crediting Bhanot as his inspiration.

Edited October 25, 2023 by Nicole44

[Biff Tannen 46163]

19 hours ago, atomheartbevo said:

“You need to cuff me right now or it's going to be bad," Emerson told a flight attendant, according to the criminal complaint. 

"The officer and Emerson talked about the use of psychedelic mushrooms and Emerson said it was his first time taking mushrooms," the complaint added.

Emerson told police and medical personnel that he had "consumed 'magic mushrooms' approximately 48 hours prior to the incident on the plane," the affidavit says. 
———-

 

We’ve all been there.

48 hours?  Did he eat a pound of them or something?  48 minutes would make more sense.

[YGIFS 19458]

It's been a very long time since I've even seen somebody on those, so I could be way off.  As I understand it though, nowadays, they make a liquid concentrate of the stuff and can "inject"/"infuse" the psychotropic ingredients into edibles which are slow-release.  Like a dripping micro-dose.  It's all way different now than when we were younger.  

Of course, chemistry aside...there is the very real possibility that the guy was tripping his fucking ass off still when questioned by medical personnel and police and had no concept of time.  They could go back and look at the airport footage and see him shoveling a handful into his mouth in the parking garage 20 minutes before he got on the plane.  If it really was his first time, it can stay in your system with marked effects for a very long time.  

Dealer, "Okay man, it's your fist time.  I'm gonna weigh you out 8 grams.  Eat 2 grams to start.  And then after 4 hours, if you're feeling okay and liking it, eat the other 2 grams.  Then after 48 hours, your body should reset and you can do the same thing again with the remaining 4 grams."

Emerson, "Eat all 8 grams for 48 hours of liking it.  Got it!"  

He definitely has the best "bad trip" story to beat any other for so long as hallucinigens exist.  "Fucking drug rookies.  Really 'Emerson'd' that trip last night."  

[TexPx 2336]

It’s generally believed that Cubensis lasts about the same time no matter how much you take. The experience will be more intense but the length of time is a pretty consistent 5 to 6 hrs. Which is nice because you can dose early evening and still get some sleep later on.

I can confirm this with my own research.

“Your experience may vary:

It is a general consensus that a Cubensis (the most popular magic mushroom) trip usually takes about 45-60 minutes to come on, and lasts around 6 hours if the dry mushrooms are consumed by chewing and swallowing full mushrooms. This is a general timeframe and each person may notice effects for a longer or shorter duration. Far more subtle effects may still be observed following the normal 6 hour timeframe.

The length of a trip depends primarily upon the method of ingestion, and not so much upon the amount ingested. Regardless of the method of digestion though, psilocybes are pretty consistent as far as how long the effects last. When mushrooms are powdered or infused into a tea the onset is much faster, the peak hits harder and with more intensity, and the overall length of the trip may be reduced.”

https://www.shroomery.org/9064/How-long-does-a-mushroom-trip-last

[Blotto 24013]

On 10/24/2023 at 3:34 PM, High Plains Drifter said:

Have at it, bro. I'll stick to my sex doll, wait did I say that out loud?

A few clorox wipes will do wonders getting her back to that factory fresh feel.

[YGIFS 19458]

11 minutes ago, Blotto said:

A few clorox wipes will do wonders getting her back to that factory fresh feel.

Oh that's what he meant by having us ingest bleach into our bodies.  oh, right, right, right, right...

[crash_davis 23469]

I admire the co-pilot's dedication to NOT disrupt the flight. He should be celebrated as a hero with conviction, not charged like a petty criminal. I'm thinking new pussy was waiting for him and he was NOT going to miss hitting it 

 

https://abcnews.go.com/Business/wireStory/pilot-indicted-allegedly-threatening-shoot-captain-flight-diverted-104525370

A pilot has been indicted for allegedly threatening to shoot the captain if the flight was diverted

Authorities say a co-pilot threatened to shoot the captain if the plane was diverted to take care of a passenger who needed medical attention

[Scheiss Meister 8468]

If he absolutely positively had to be there overnight, he should have flown for UPS.

[Gatorubet 30711]

1 hour ago, crash_davis said:

Authorities say a co-pilot threatened to shoot the captain if the plane was diverted to take care of a passenger who needed medical attention

Stupid Black Box voice recorder!

[Samson's Wig 3230]

On 10/24/2023 at 3:32 PM, High Plains Drifter said:

 

Keep it up assholes. It won't be long now until alcohol is banned on flights. And breathalyzers before boarding.

 

Was in the Denver airport over the weekend and a young lady sat down next to me at the bar and was already completely and clearly drunk.  The bartender served her three more doubles over the course of an hour or so.  She just kept getting louder and more obnoxious by the minute.  At some point, she mentioned she was headed to Austin and I thought it was my turn to see some shenanigans.  Sure enough, she stumbles onto the same plane and sits down across the aisle from me.   She just passed out and snored the entire flight.  I was a little disappointed.  

I thought the same thing you posted above while watching the entire thing.  Idiots will ruin things for the rest of us, per usual.

[Biff Tannen 46163]

On 10/25/2023 at 4:50 PM, YGIFS said:

He definitely has the best "bad trip" story to beat any other for so long as hallucinigens exist.  "Fucking drug rookies.  Really 'Emerson'd' that trip last night."  

I take drugs like a fucking champion.  We should all be allowed to take fucking drugs, but we can’t, can we? Because Sarah took drugs and she stabbed her fucking kids. Oh! “Oh, thanks, Sarah. You fucked it up for everyone!”

[Nicole44 22309]

Lulz. Ghetto airport. Should play the Elvis song “In the Ghetto” on a loop…I should not be laughing so hard at this but I am. Tickets low as $1.37. American Dollars. I don’t want to hear about how people don’t have the money to travel man. 

 

One social media commenter writes, “LOL at writing flight info by hand, just like some restaurant’s daily specials. Lack of gender separated toilets, aesthetics of old bus stations.” Another says, “Still better than JFK.”

https://viewfromthewing.com/chinas-most-ghetto-airport-handwritten-flight-info-1-37-tickets/

Edited November 1, 2023 by Nicole44

[YGIFS 19458]

10 minutes ago, Biff Tannen said:

I take drugs like a fucking champion.  We should all be allowed to take fucking drugs, but we can’t, can we? Because Sarah took drugs and she stabbed her fucking kids. Oh! “Oh, thanks, Sarah. You fucked it up for everyone!”

Is that a comedian bit?  It sounds familiar but I can't place it.  Not that you're not funny enough to originate it.  

I cannot imagine how horrific it would be for me to take mushrooms on a long flight.  I fucking hate flying as it is, I cannot imagine bringing psychotropic drugs into the equation.  For many years, I had to rent a car for work trips to go around and see clients, plus I just liked the freedom to go explore or drive to some trails to hike in a different place.  So I had to be dead sober upon arrival.  Then my last two firms, and wanting to not spend any more time in a city than I needed to because of the kids, I would book flights based solely on itinerary/shortest flights.  And Uber came along at the same time so it was several cocktails and xanax to smooth out the flight.  I was an ideal row-mate.  didn't say a word, leaned into the window crevice due to my broad shoulders, bought drinks/coupons for anyone in my row who wanted one, quietly worked or read, and limited myself to one bathroom trip per flight.  With no alcohol, I wonder if there isn't some short-lasting drug I shouldn't be looking into to take the edge off the turbulence.  I've tried edibles but don't really like them, never really liked smoking as a youth either.  I gotta start up in the air again in 2024 and need to sort something out before I end up as a worldstar sensation.  

[Biff Tannen 46163]

3 minutes ago, YGIFS said:

Is that a comedian bit?  It sounds familiar but I can't place it.  Not that you're not funny enough to originate it.  

I cannot imagine how horrific it would be for me to take mushrooms on a long flight.  I fucking hate flying as it is, I cannot imagine bringing psychotropic drugs into the equation.  For many years, I had to rent a car for work trips to go around and see clients, plus I just liked the freedom to go explore or drive to some trails to hike in a different place.  So I had to be dead sober upon arrival.  Then my last two firms, and wanting to not spend any more time in a city than I needed to because of the kids, I would book flights based solely on itinerary/shortest flights.  And Uber came along at the same time so it was several cocktails and xanax to smooth out the flight.  I was an ideal row-mate.  didn't say a word, leaned into the window crevice due to my broad shoulders, bought drinks/coupons for anyone in my row who wanted one, quietly worked or read, and limited myself to one bathroom trip per flight.  With no alcohol, I wonder if there isn't some short-lasting drug I shouldn't be looking into to take the edge off the turbulence.  I've tried edibles but don't really like them, never really liked smoking as a youth either.  I gotta start up in the air again in 2024 and need to sort something out before I end up as a worldstar sensation.  

Jim Jeffries on gun control

[DaysOff 8203]

I admire the co-pilot's dedication to NOT disrupt the flight. He should be celebrated as a hero with conviction, not charged like a petty criminal. I'm thinking new pussy was waiting for him and he was NOT going to miss hitting it 
 
https://abcnews.go.com/Business/wireStory/pilot-indicted-allegedly-threatening-shoot-captain-flight-diverted-104525370
A pilot has been indicted for allegedly threatening to shoot the captain if the flight was diverted

Authorities say a co-pilot threatened to shoot the captain if the plane was diverted to take care of a passenger who needed medical attention

Goddamn. Just saw this. Eight more years of this bullshit.

[Willfully Horn 8259]

42 minutes ago, YGIFS said:

Is that a comedian bit?  It sounds familiar but I can't place it.  Not that you're not funny enough to originate it.  

I cannot imagine how horrific it would be for me to take mushrooms on a long flight.  I fucking hate flying as it is, I cannot imagine bringing psychotropic drugs into the equation.  For many years, I had to rent a car for work trips to go around and see clients, plus I just liked the freedom to go explore or drive to some trails to hike in a different place.  So I had to be dead sober upon arrival.  Then my last two firms, and wanting to not spend any more time in a city than I needed to because of the kids, I would book flights based solely on itinerary/shortest flights.  And Uber came along at the same time so it was several cocktails and xanax to smooth out the flight.  I was an ideal row-mate.  didn't say a word, leaned into the window crevice due to my broad shoulders, bought drinks/coupons for anyone in my row who wanted one, quietly worked or read, and limited myself to one bathroom trip per flight.  With no alcohol, I wonder if there isn't some short-lasting drug I shouldn't be looking into to take the edge off the turbulence.  I've tried edibles but don't really like them, never really liked smoking as a youth either.  I gotta start up in the air again in 2024 and need to sort something out before I end up as a worldstar sensation.  

Xanax. Your doc should hook you up.