City of Austin seeking ways to fuck up Zilker Park

[ztejas 43411]

https://www.kxan.com/news/local/austin/city-of-austin-seeks-community-feedback-on-future-of-zilker-park/amp/

Someone tell me this is satire. 

"Hey you know that awesome urban park that is one of the jewels of cities across America? That no one ever complains about and is only ever cited as one of the greatest, most quintissential things about the city? Let's tear it up to add a bunch of sidewalks, bike-lanes, and fuck up traffic"

I just don't understand what world these fucking morons live in. In what way is Zilker inaccessible? Let's put an interstate through Central Park while we're at it. 

This city's fascination with fucking up things that aren't, never were, and never will be broken is astounding. 

Weren't at one point they discussing turning South Lamar into a street with one lane going in each direction?

[dcar00 14151]

3 minutes ago, ztejas said:

https://www.kxan.com/news/local/austin/city-of-austin-seeks-community-feedback-on-future-of-zilker-park/amp/

Someone tell me this is satire. 

"Hey you know that awesome urban park that is one of the jewels of cities across America? That no one ever complains about and is only ever cited as one of the greatest, most quintissential things about the city? Let's tear it up to add a bunch of sidewalks, bike-lanes, and fuck up traffic"

I just don't understand what world these fucking morons live in. In what way is Zilker inaccessible? Let's put an interstate through Central Park while we're at it. 

This city's fascination with fucking up things that aren't, never were, and never will be broken is astounding. 

Weren't at one point they discussing turning South Lamar into a street with one lane going in each direction?

bike lanes are the answer to everything.

[ztejas 43411]

10 minutes ago, dcar00 said:

bike lanes are the answer to everything.

What I really don't understand is aren't there already a zillion bike lanes and walking trails and crosswalks down there? It's like the most accessible part of the city. 

Also the duality between "we need more bike access because we have a huge cycling community but we also need to add more parking so people can drive there"

There's probably a bitch about CoA thread I could have thrown this in so apologies. I have just never once in my life been anywhere near Zilker and thought "YOU KNOW WHAT THIS PLACE REALLY NEEDS..."

Seriously, from the same article:

One of the main things they’re looking at is improving access to the park, so less people have to drive there.

The city is also looking at adding more parking

Edited August 11, 2021 by ztejas

[CooterBrown 18002]

We need less access to Zilker Park. It's fucking overcrowded every minute of the day already.

[atomheartbevo 89625]

15 minutes ago, ztejas said:

This city's fascination with fucking up things that aren't, never were, and never will be broken is astounding. 

If only Surly knew somebody on the Austin City Council.....

[atomheartbevo 89625]

Also, I clicked on this thread expecting it to be about the city deciding to develop some mixed-use retail/housing plan for Zilker.

 

[ztejas 43411]

Just now, atomheartbevo said:

Also, I clicked on this thread expecting it to be about the city deciding to develop some mixed-use retail/housing plan for Zilker.

 

Oh just wait. They're meeting again in October.

[dcar00 14151]

8 minutes ago, ztejas said:

What I really don't understand is aren't there already a zillion bike lanes and walking trails and crosswalks down there? It's like the most accessible part of the city. 

 

One of the main things they’re looking at is improving access to the park, so less people have to drive there.

The city is also looking at adding more parking

you understand who these idiots are correct?  Bike lanes take up space for cars.   there are never enough bike lanes because cars exist still.

Edited August 11, 2021 by dcar00

[sidis 9823]

8 minutes ago, ztejas said:

One of the main things they’re looking at is improving access to the park, so less people have to drive there.

 

kxan beat writer group needs stannis on their editorial staff.

[ztejas 43411]

10 minutes ago, CooterBrown said:

We need less access to Zilker Park. It's fucking overcrowded every minute of the day already.

There are also still square inches of town lake unoccupied by SUPers and kayakers during the day on the weekends. Maybe we can lash together a walking bridge from over by the YMCA to Zilker using paddle boards and kayaks?

Also - does anyone remember the April fool's joke that some local outlet ran with where they did the mock up of the stadium being built on top of town lake over east of Congress? We are getting closer and closer to that not being a joke. 

[JimmyJames 12271]

The city of Austin is great despite its government and council. Not because of it. They’re always trying to find new and interesting ways to fuck things up though (usually at the behest of some rich asshole looking to make an extra buck) so eternal vigilance is required. 

[Grade of D as in David 13253]

34 minutes ago, dcar00 said:

bike lanes are the answer to everything.

Bike lanes are old news, it's all gondolas these days

[dcar00 14151]

Just now, Grade of D as in David said:

Bike lanes are old news, it's all gondolas these days

Man I would be in for gondolas!

[ztejas 43411]

9 minutes ago, JimmyJames said:

The city of Austin is great despite its government and council. Not because of it. They’re always trying to find new and interesting ways to fuck things up though (usually at the behest of some rich asshole looking to make an extra buck) so eternal vigilance is required. 

I actually like what they did under Mopac next to Austin High with the restrooms and landscaping and such. But that was a shitty, dirty underpass mostly surrounded by concrete and parking lots. The walking bridge upgrade on Lamar was nice, too. 

So here's hoping maybe they trip over their own dicks and do something cool. Just the thought of doing anything to change the most iconic part of the city makes me nervous.

Edited August 11, 2021 by ztejas

[atomheartbevo 89625]

10 minutes ago, ztejas said:

the mock up of the stadium being built on top of town lake over east of Congress? We are getting closer and closer to that not being a joke. 

Well, all that water is a lot of wasted space!

I'm honestly surprised that nobody is making a go at some kind of elevated retail or whatever spaces along/over the river lake.  Or building some kind of large bridge with retail/hotels/etc. over it.

You know there are people thinking about it.

[ztejas 43411]

Just now, atomheartbevo said:

Well, all that water is a lot of wasted space!

I'm honestly surprised that nobody is making a go at some kind of elevated retail or whatever spaces along/over the river lake.  Or building some kind of large bridge with retail/hotels/etc. over it.

You know there are people thinking about it.

You can only build so many high rise condos on Rainey street. 

[atomheartbevo 89625]

1 minute ago, ztejas said:

You can only build so many high rise condos on Rainey street. 

They used to do this stuff in medieval London, and I'm sure there are many modern examples.

 

[JimmyJames 12271]

1 minute ago, ztejas said:

I actually like what they did under Mopac next to Austin High with the restrooms and landscaping and such. But that was a shitty underpass mostly surrounded by concrete and parking lots. The walking bridge upgrade on Lamar was nice, too. 

So here's hoping maybe they trip over their own dicks and do something cool. Just the thought of doing anything to change the most iconic part of the city makes me nervous.

Wouldn’t be surprised if it was the trail foundation that did all that under Mopac instead of the city. But I don’t really know. 
 

The city built the walking bridge but people forget at the time it was built it was considered an unnecessary joke that nobody walked on because people just walked on the admittedly narrow Lamar bridge sidewalk anyway. Time has proven it to be a wise decision since Austin grew so much, got way more crowded, and more people started living downtown. Hell a broken clock is right twice a day applies there. Kirk Watson was actually one of our better mayors. 

[ztejas 43411]

1 minute ago, JimmyJames said:

Wouldn’t be surprised if it was the trail foundation that did all that under Mopac instead of the city. But I don’t really know. 

I think you are totally fucking right. 

 

1 minute ago, JimmyJames said:

Hell a broken clock is right twice a day applies there.

That was also what, 10-15 years ago when that project started?

[JimmyJames 12271]

1 minute ago, ztejas said:

I think you are totally fucking right. 

 

That was also what, 10-15 years ago when that project started?

Pretty sure it was finished in like 1999. Could be wrong though. It was around then. 

[ztejas 43411]

4 minutes ago, JimmyJames said:

Pretty sure it was finished in like 1999. Could be wrong though. It was around then. 

No way. The one with the spiral down? That was somewhat recent. Maybe started around '99 but I remember when it was being done.

[Mappable 37]

Zilker Park doesn't need to become Zilker Parking.  the park needs higher parking prices and parking enforcement.

It's frustrating to see Zilker swarming with wrong way drivers, fucktards parking on the grass by the rugby field and volleyball courts, and the boondockers dumping their human shit in the bushes next to the trail.

 

[Valmy77 13225]

1 hour ago, CooterBrown said:

We need less access to Zilker Park. It's fucking overcrowded every minute of the day already.

Yeah no shit. I have never been to Zilker and thought: "man if only more people could get here"

[ztejas 43411]

@Mappable for city council 

[CooterBrown 18002]

They need to develop other parks to alleviate the stress on Zilker.  

[KaiserSoze 998]

1 hour ago, ztejas said:

Also - does anyone remember the April fool's joke that some local outlet ran with where they did the mock up of the stadium being built on top of town lake over east of Congress? We are getting closer and closer to that not being a joke. 

 

Yep, that was a solid April Fools' joke by the Chronicle for the edition leading up to 4/1 back in 2014. 

 

https://www.austinchronicle.com/news/2014-03-28/all-aboard-the-soccer-train/

[Judge Roybeanbag 11819]

if only you had the ability to vote for people to carry out your will.  Oh wait, you do.  Stop whining, Karen.

[JimmyJames 12271]

1 hour ago, ztejas said:

No way. The one with the spiral down? That was somewhat recent. Maybe started around '99 but I remember when it was being done.

Just walked by it. Finished June 2001. 

[Judge Roybeanbag 11819]

2 hours ago, ztejas said:

https://www.kxan.com/news/local/austin/city-of-austin-seeks-community-feedback-on-future-of-zilker-park/amp/

Someone tell me this is satire. 

"Hey you know that awesome urban park that is one of the jewels of cities across America? That no one ever complains about and is only ever cited as one of the greatest, most quintissential things about the city? Let's tear it up to add a bunch of sidewalks, bike-lanes, and fuck up traffic"

I just don't understand what world these fucking morons live in. In what way is Zilker inaccessible? Let's put an interstate through Central Park while we're at it. 

This city's fascination with fucking up things that aren't, never were, and never will be broken is astounding. 

Weren't at one point they discussing turning South Lamar into a street with one lane going in each direction?

BTW SMU is going to to the way of the non-moneymaking conferences.  yea ponies.   

[CooterBrown 18002]

3 minutes ago, JimmyJames said:

Just walked by it. Finished June 2001. 

 

[ztejas 43411]

11 minutes ago, JimmyJames said:

Just walked by it. Finished June 2001. 

Little earlier than I thought - pretty good call. 

10 minutes ago, Judge Roybeanbag said:

BTW SMU is going to to the way of the non-moneymaking conferences.  yea ponies.   

What are you blathering about? 

[Underdog 28545]

A floating stadium would be awesome. 

[crash_davis 23096]

Everything about Austin is crowded. That's what happens when a gazillion people move to town in 10 years. Greenbelt, Barton Creek, Zilker Park, Barton Springs, Town Lake. It's fucking crazy. But you know what, it's still fucking cool as shit because no other city as all that shit within minutes of downtown. Austin was never going to stay a quiet hidden gem that only people in Texas knew about.

With that said, agreed on adding more access. Fuck that. It's already crowded as fuck. It's bearable because of limited access and parking. Fuck making it more accessible. Same with Town Lake and paddle boards. There's already a gazillion people who don't give a fuck about the lake and pollute the fuck out of it every weekend. It's the same bros who pollute and fuck up the Greenbelt and Barton Creek. Having more parking and access is only going to invite more fucking brodiots.

And fuck bike lanes and bike lanes solve everything nazis. They are only slightly less annoying than vegans.

[Judge Roybeanbag 11819]

14 minutes ago, ztejas said:

Little earlier than I thought - pretty good call. 

What are you blathering about? 

just blathering.  As if you coke-sniffing conference sniffers care.

[crash_davis 23096]

4 minutes ago, Underdog said:

A floating stadium would be awesome. 

where's all the shit going to go?

[ztejas 43411]

12 minutes ago, Judge Roybeanbag said:

just blathering.  As if you coke-sniffing conference sniffers care.

We're starting our own conference with blackjack and hookers. Texas and OU didn't get invited. 

[crash_davis 23096]

You know the City is getting too much property tax income when they are looking for bullshit ways to spend money. 

The roads suck. North Lamar and Burnet roads are a beating. Neighborhood streets are tore up to shit. Much better ways to spend money.

[atomheartbevo 89625]

15 minutes ago, crash_davis said:

With that said, agreed on adding more access. Fuck that. It's already crowded as fuck. It's bearable because of limited access and parking. Fuck making it more accessible. Same with Town Lake and paddle boards. There's already a gazillion people who don't give a fuck about the lake and pollute the fuck out of it every weekend. It's the same bros who pollute and fuck up the Greenbelt and Barton Creek. Having more parking and access is only going to invite more fucking brodiots.

And fuck bike lanes and bike lanes solve everything nazis. They are only slightly less annoying than vegans.

Yep, put the money into making another area more desirable/fun/useful/etc.

[Brisketexan 105057]

Improve Zilker?  Man, this is super easy.  Three words.

Giant

Fitlump

Statue

[ABSR 5308]

2 hours ago, Grade of D as in David said:

Bike lanes are old news, it's all gondolas these days

I have always been  #teamgondola

[Horn_Spanker 524]

The same people who renamed Manchaca to Menchaca.  So to spend a million $ on sign changing and fucking up all addresses along it?

[Armybrat 40822]

8 hours ago, atomheartbevo said:

Well, all that water is a lot of wasted space!

I'm honestly surprised that nobody is making a go at some kind of elevated retail or whatever spaces along/over the river lake.  Or building some kind of large bridge with retail/hotels/etc. over it.

You know there are people thinking about it.

Just pray none of them see this pseudo Italian monstrosity in Las Vegas

 

[Deej 76752]

Yet they struggle to find money to keep the neighborhood pools open every summer. 

[juan pantages 124]

You try pushing a grocery cart on a dirt path

[Biff Tannen 45664]

10 hours ago, Grade of D as in David said:

Bike lanes are old news, it's all gondolas these days

 

10 hours ago, dcar00 said:

Man I would be in for gondolas!

I still think this would work. 

[ScottS 1061]

Couldn't the homeless be put to work pulling people in rickshaws to Zilker Park?  They could keep to the bike lanes.

[dcar00 14151]

10 minutes ago, Biff Tannen said:

 

I still think this would work. 

well gondolas or the Musk Chunnels.

[Judge Roybeanbag 11819]

1 hour ago, Armybrat said:

Just pray none of them see this pseudo Italian monstrosity in Las Vegas

 

Whoa wait, so can I get a job pushing gondolas thru batshit?  I’m in.  

[Biff Tannen 45664]

3 minutes ago, ScottS said:

Couldn't the homeless be put to work pulling people in rickshaws to Zilker Park?  They could keep to the bike lanes.

The government!

[Texas Jeff 1944]

Zilker has enough transit.  You can take the 801 rapid from lots of areas of town to downtown, then take the 30 over to Zilker. Or park at the mall and take the 30.  Few do that because it's easier and faster to just drive downtown and park somewhere.  Also you can put lots of stuff in your car and it's a pain the ass to take lots of stuff on the bus.

Zilker is one of the most accessible places in Austin for bikes.  Some do that but most take a car because it's easier.  The LAB right across the lake is mostly empty.

The best part of the park is closed for almost three months of the year for ACL + Christmas lights prep.  During the best weather of the year.

Bring back the Zephyr, keep the playground clean and provide a decent food stand near the pool and I think we're done.