What Advice Would You Give This Horse?

[Vic Mackey 47037]

...

[Scheiss Meister 8407]

Run.  As fast as you can.  Actually, you can pretty much walk away.  She ain't catching you.

[Marfa Low Crown 2546]

That skirt makes you look fat. 

[tfoolry 8214]

Take notes from this horse. 
 

 

 

 

[Kennythetiger 9382]

One of my favorites. 

[demos 3003]

[CooterBrown 18012]

Be gentle with Mrs. Mackey.

[Blotto 23508]

without a crane or hoist of some sort, that horse aint got nothing to worry about. Unless she decides to eat him. 

[Ten Bears 2481]

3 hours ago, Kennythetiger said:

One of my favorites. 

When I was 13 a horse kicked me square in the chest, knocking me out cold and stopping my heart for a minute or so.  Close to home yada yada.

[Davis Lane 5584]

Fake a broken leg.

Wait....never mind.

[HornsOverIthaca 2333]

When crossing the Nueces River, avoid the part thats full of water moccasins. 

[Sam Lin 3559]

Was expecting a SJP thread. Am disappoint.

[HornsOverIthaca 2333]

[elfenix 34240]

Double T.

[El Diablo 4232]

Switch places, walk in the shade. 

[52-80 19157]

Producers are considering filming Sex & the City movie #3.  Apply early.

[High Plains Drifter 11049]

22 hours ago, Marfa Low Crown said:

That skirt makes you look fat. 

 

Its not the skirt that makes that horse look fat, its the fat that makes that horse look fat.

 

-Al Bundy

[Pescado_Rojo 19416]

Orange is not slimming

[fattyflattie 4639]

18 hours ago, Ten Bears said:

When I was 13 a horse kicked me square in the chest, knocking me out cold and stopping my heart for a minute or so.  Close to home yada yada.

A family friend of ours was kicked in the face about that same age. Bunch of surgeries and whatnot later and you can still tell.  Not a place to fafo. 

[NeverMarryAStripper 21907]

When I was 5 we were staying at my grandmother's place in El Campo.  My my two older sisters were watching me and mom told them to stay out of the pasture next door.  Of course they drag me drag me over there to pet the horse.  That fucker kicked me square in the back when I wasn't looking.  I flew what felt like a hundred.  My sisters carried me back to grandma's and pretended like nothing happened.  I didn't rat them out, but  my mom saw me in the bathtub and noticed the two giant horseshow shaped bruises on my back.  They still blame me for getting them in trouble.

[Dennis Taylor 18821]

18 minutes ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

When I was 5 we were staying at my grandmother's place in El Campo.  My my two older sisters were watching me and mom told them to stay out of the pasture next door.  Of course they drag me drag me over there to pet the horse.  That fucker kicked me square in the back when I wasn't looking.  I flew what felt like a hundred.  My sisters carried me back to grandma's and pretended like nothing happened.  I didn't rat them out, but  my mom saw me in the bathtub and noticed the two giant horseshow shaped bruises on my back.  They still blame me for getting them in trouble.

Is this the whole story? You sure 5 year old you didn't pull his tail or throw some shit at him first?

[NeverMarryAStripper 21907]

I was just minding my own business.  I'm sure one of my sisters did something to it.

Edited September 16, 2021 by NeverMarryAStripper

[TrashMaster G 17557]

19 hours ago, Davis Lane said:

Fake a broken leg.

Wait....never mind.

[Ten Bears 2481]

1 hour ago, Dennis Taylor said:

Is this the whole story? You sure 5 year old you didn't pull his tail or throw some shit at him first?

It was definitely my 13 yo self's fault.  I had gentle broke this little mustang filly and she was a sweetheart.  I was brushing her tail out with a curry comb and didn't notice a few tail hairs caught in comb where the handle meets the comb and as I reached up for a new upstroke jerked them out.  I don't remember getting kicked but I do remember hearing the sound.  I had an inch tall knot the shape of a horseshoe square in my chest bone for a few weeks.