That ain't Shelley, Urban...

[GreenspointTexas 9,662]

Hes fucked

[SizzleChest 8,284]

[UTGrad98 2,280]

[Guest Lobo]

^

can't add any more rep today, this thread has been too funny.  

"Hey son, what are you doing up?"
"Dad, you woke up the whole internet."  

"You know I wouldn't do anything to hurt your mom.  I work so hard at coaching."  You get these feelings that make you do things." 

"Hey dad, who was that half-naked lady grinding on you?"
"What, her?  She's just a waitress.  I was just ordering some fish for you, the grandkids, and uh.....uh....."

"Shelley, Dad?"
"Shelley, sure...sure, yeah."  

"Think mom'll buy it, dad?"
"Good talk son."  

Edited October 5, 2021 by Lobo

[Horn Dog 9,883]

[CooterBrown 18,015]

That fivehead tho.

That chick looks like Costanza.

[Duval Street 420]

43 minutes ago, lilMAC25 said:

You’d catch your dick on fire trying to get it out of your pants if she wanted you…

 

 

you know, we know it, you know we know it 

Of course I would…I’m judgmental, not gay.

[lilMAC25 3,801]

4 minutes ago, Duval Street said:

Of course I would…I’m judgmental, not gay.

Fair enough

[UTGrad98 2,280]

11 minutes ago, Horn Dog said:

Right down to the pink shirt

[jimmyjazz 46,000]

At least it was the blonde and not the brunette.

[Sawbonz 27,580]

10 hours ago, Landomatic said:

 

Well, maybe we need to define "fingering" or "finger banging," but given that chick is wearing  jeans and they are pulled up and cinched with a belt, by my definition, he is definitely not "fingering" or "banging" anything. Rubbing her hooha through her jeans at most?

Would not have needed to go to the replay official 

 

 

 

 

I don’t think any less of urban for this. Of course I’m not sure I could think any less of him 

[CowtownHorn 5,126]

5 hours ago, closetohumping said:

Nobody is claiming or claiming to be a victim here.  

[runthebone 8,024]

Well, pussy is undefeated, but so is every NFL team when it's playing the Jaguars.

[naija 2,869]

people paid this guy big bucks to lecture about Leadership & Morals even after Florida and Ohio State.... of course he is going to get up there and lie to everyone's face

[McCroskey 1,505]

He goes to London in two weeks.  Man, what a hotbed.

[PassiveAggressiveCoach 118]

How long until he goes on vacation err rehab and a tearful press conference? 

Edited October 5, 2021 by PassiveAggressiveCoach

[Okcool 786]

On 10/2/2021 at 10:10 PM, Mitch Cumsteen said:

I'm gonna have to hear from Zach Smith on this one before knowing what to think about all of this. 

 Not this shit again assholes…smh 

Edited October 5, 2021 by Okcool

[PassiveAggressiveCoach 118]

12 minutes ago, Okcool said:

 Not this shit again assholes…smh 

Also, how happy drunk is Zach Smith right now and when is his next podcast? 

Also, I just watched his press conference. He lied his ass off. Can't wait for the next one. Actually he lied her ass off. 

Edited October 5, 2021 by PassiveAggressiveCoach

[staboner 4,984]

10 hours ago, Harrison Stafford said:

 

lets keep this motherfucker on track. minute 4.26 and 4.46. keep that backfield in motion

 

[C-Man 27,236]

The Athletic shreds Urban pretty good here.

https://theathletic.com/2867670/2021/10/04/jones-jaguars-gambled-on-urban-meyer-and-now-the-winless-team-is-paying-the-price/?article_source=search&search_query=urban meyer

Quote

Imagine the gall it took for Jaguars coach Urban Meyer to step in front of cameras Monday morning and attempt to explain away a viral video of a woman — who was decidedly not his wife — grinding on him as someone who was trying to entice him onto a dance floor.

“It was stupid,” Meyer said. “I should have left.”

But clearly Meyer thinks we’re the ones who are stupid. That we’re just going to watch the clips of Meyer at that bar last week and take him at his word and move on, even if our eyes and brains are telling us not to.

The problem isn’t necessarily Meyer’s actions that night. That’s an issue for him to deal with privately with his wife and family.

The issue is how easily Meyer was willing to lie about it, and his hubris in continuing to believe he’ll become a successful NFL coach. His Jaguars are 0-4, and Meyer’s tenure in Jacksonville has quickly turned from a curiosity to a spectacular disaster.

There’s so much to unpack in the latest Meyer drama, which began Thursday night in Cincinnati, when his Jaguars blew a late lead against the Bengals and fell to 0-4.

Rather than flying back to Florida on the team’s chartered plane that night, Meyer said he stayed behind in Ohio to spend time with his grandchildren.

Since being hired by the Jaguars earlier this year, Meyer has routinely eschewed NFL norms, but this is an especially odd one.

While the upside of a Thursday night game is that the weekend can serve as a mini-bye week, that off-time is typically only a treat for players. It’s unheard of for a head coach to not travel with his team and spend the day following a game in the office with his staff.

And for the head coach of a young, struggling team to skip out on that step? It’s not just disrespectful to his players and his fellow coaches, but also it should have Meyer’s bosses questioning his commitment and ability to do this job.

Perhaps Meyer’s latest misstep would be easier to write off had it occurred in a vacuum. We’d be able to excuse Meyer’s stay in Ohio or regard the personal indiscretions as a one-time mistake.

But this just seems to be how Meyer operates, and owner Shad Khan should have known this when he hired Meyer and gave him complete control of football operations earlier this year. Khan was counting on Meyer’s individual star power and popularity in North Florida to re-energize the fan base of a team that won just one game in 2020. What Khan got was a team that might not be any better on the field and a head coach who has been an embarrassment off it.

Let’s recap the missteps in Meyer’s first nine months in Jacksonville:

1. He hired Chris Doyle to be the Jaguars’ director of sports performance, despite the fact Doyle left the University of Iowa in 2020 after multiple former players accused the school’s former strength coach of racist remarks and bullying. In a news conference, Meyer said he personally vetted Doyle and that he “felt great about the hire” because he had known Doyle for more than 20 years. Meyer linked their past together to the University of Utah, though Doyle was only in Salt Lake City for one season, in 1998, and Meyer didn’t coach there until 2003-2004. Doyle resigned from the Jaguars in February following criticisms of his hiring.

2. The NFL fined Meyer and the Jaguars in July after an investigation by the league and the NFLPA determined the team had violated rules that limit contact during organized team activities. According to ESPN, the league fined Meyer $100,000, and the team $200,000. The Jaguars will also lose two offseason practices next year.

3. Remember the Tim Tebow Thing? In May, Meyer signed Tebow, his former star pupil from the University of Florida, to play tight end. Never mind that Tebow had strictly played quarterback during his NFL career (and had been unwilling to consider other positions while trying to stick as a starting quarterback). He also hadn’t played in an NFL game since 2012. The move reeked of a publicity stunt in Tebow’s hometown, and the idea that a 33-year-old former college star would become an impactful locker room leader and a strong moral presence was misguided. Tebow, as expected, struggled to learn the nuances of the new position and was released during the first round of roster cuts in August.

4. One of the more perplexing football moves was a seemingly unnecessary quarterback competition in training camp between Trevor Lawrence, the No. 1 pick in the draft, and Gardner Minshew. The latter was eventually traded to the Eagles for a sixth-round draft pick. It’s one thing to encourage competition and ensure players earn their spots. It’s another to limit the first-team reps of your franchise quarterback when he (and his teammates) desperately need them.

5. According to a document obtained by The Athletic last month, the Jaguars started the season with one of the three lowest vaccination rates in the league. This, despite Meyer telling reporters that the team considered vaccination status when making roster decisions. That prompted the NFL Players Association to open an investigation and the team to release a statement the next day that said “no players were released because of their vaccination status.”

Meyer called the league protocols “pretty punitive” as they relate to unvaccinated players, and Meyer’s wife, Shelley, frequently posts tweets in which she disagrees with vaccine requirements.

And then there are the issues on the field.

The Jaguars were blown out by the Texans in Week 1, 37-21. Houston has been outscored 95-30 and lost every game in the three weeks since. Jacksonville is one of only two winless teams remaining in the NFL, joining the Detroit Lions.

There have been a handful of exciting moments, most notably Jamal Agnew’s 109-yard kickoff return for a touchdown against the Arizona Cardinals. Yet Jacksonville is 0-4 for the first time since 2014, and despite some encouraging signs from Lawrence, it’s the only team that has failed to score more than 21 points in a game this season.

Urban Meyer, Trevor Lawrence and the Jaguars are one of two winless teams in the NFL this season. (Mark J. Rebilas / USA Today)

Could Khan have anticipated this sort of mess? He might have been blinded by Meyer’s collegiate winning percentage: Meyer was 187-32 as a head coach at Bowling Green, Utah, Florida and Ohio State, winning national titles at Florida in 2006 and 2008 and at Ohio State in 2014. Perhaps he believed Meyer could build a winning college-style program in Jacksonville. Still, it would have been terribly naïve of Khan to think that Meyer’s first NFL team wouldn’t have the same type of off-field baggage that surrounded him in college.

His Florida teams, in particular, were rife with drama, and Meyer was notoriously lax about letting players with drug and disciplinary issues remain with the program. An investigation by the New York Times in 2013, following the arrest of former Gators tight end Aaron Hernandez on murder charges, found that 31 Gators were arrested during Meyer’s Florida tenure. Meyer cited health issues in stepping down as Florida coach at the end of the 2010 season.

And Meyer’s legacy at Ohio State is complicated. He re-established the Buckeyes as a national power, leading Ohio State to an undefeated season in 2012 and winning three Big Ten titles, but his time in Columbus ended unceremoniously.

He was suspended for three games in 2018 following a university investigation on his handling of domestic violence allegations against Zach Smith, one of Meyer’s longtime assistant coaches. Meyer publicly denied having any knowledge of a history of domestic abuse by Smith against Smith’s former wife, despite text messages between Courtney Smith and Meyer’s wife and comments from Zach Smith in an interview with ESPN that indicated otherwise. Meyer ultimately retired at the end of the 2018 season after being diagnosed with a brain cyst that caused debilitating headaches, and returned to broadcasting for two years (a role he also held during his one year between coaching jobs at Florida and Ohio State).

When Khan hired Meyer in January, it was one of the most surprising moves of the 2021 NFL job cycle.

Meyer had long been an intriguing name in NFL circles because of his college success, history of developing college players into top NFL draft picks and his extensive experience with the spread offense. But his hiring to the NFL came with plenty of questions about how he’d make the transition to professional football, if his college-style motivational tactics would resonate with veteran players, and how he’d handle a massive rebuild.

Those who have tried it before him, such as Pete Carroll and Chip Kelly, have produced mixed results.

Those questions about Meyer remain unanswered, though week by week, it appears he is not up for the challenge. And now it’s on us — and, especially, on Khan — if we keep believing he might be.

 

[runthebone 8,024]

1 hour ago, C-Man said:

The Athletic shreds Urban pretty good here.

https://theathletic.com/2867670/2021/10/04/jones-jaguars-gambled-on-urban-meyer-and-now-the-winless-team-is-paying-the-price/?article_source=search&search_query=urban meyer

 

That article would be a lot better if it incorporated the surly Urban thread.  Huge omission.

[Vito Andolini 9,127]

Word for word from Cayman Nebraska’s Linked-In:

I currently have a full-time job in digital marketing,

[52-80 19,205]

5 hours ago, McCroskey said:

He goes to London in two weeks.  Man, what a hotbed.

 

[ztejas 43,520]

Eh

Edited October 5, 2021 by ztejas

[notre dame joe 190]

The whole situation stinks.

[Dnaguy 12,012]

9 hours ago, jimmyjazz said:

At least it was the blonde and not the brunette.

 

Say what now???........

 

[JFKFC 4,891]

But I'm in so deep
You know I'm such a fool for you
You got me wrapped around your finger
Do you have to let it linger?
Do you have to, do you have to, do you have to let it linger?

[tx ind 7,013]

3 hours ago, 52-80 said:

 

 

[Vic]x,1,1,1,x,x,1[\Vic]

Edited October 5, 2021 by tx ind

['stache 21,825]

7 hours ago, C-Man said:

The Athletic shreds Urban pretty good here.

https://theathletic.com/2867670/2021/10/04/jones-jaguars-gambled-on-urban-meyer-and-now-the-winless-team-is-paying-the-price/?article_source=search&search_query=urban meyer

 

So his wife is a Facebook anti-vaxer? I’d probably fuck around on her too, lol.

[Pig Bellmont 8,719]

7 hours ago, C-Man said:

The Athletic shreds Urban pretty good here.

https://theathletic.com/2867670/2021/10/04/jones-jaguars-gambled-on-urban-meyer-and-now-the-winless-team-is-paying-the-price/?article_source=search&search_query=urban meyer

 

Great read but a little unfair shot at Pete Carroll at the end- winning a super bowl should be a little better than comparison to Chip Kelly’s pro career or dismissed as “mixed results”

[Bill Lumbergh 7,171]

That article would be a lot better if it incorporated the surly Urban thread.  Huge omission.

"Meyer's move to the NFL was particularly surprising given he was previously expected to accept the head coaching role at The University of Texas.

For weeks, fans on a Texas site tracked planes, analyzed hotel room curtains, interpreted squid emojis, and brought 'big dick energy' to believing Meyer would accept their job, but for all their efforts were only rewarded with a picture of Jesus caveman eating a McRib.

Texas, meanwhile is 4-1 and trending up under new coach Steve Sarkisian, who as of the time at this reporting is not known to have engaged in any 'hands outside pants butt play' or other embarrassing behavior since taking the job."

[Pig Bellmont 8,719]

3 minutes ago, Bill Lumbergh said:

who as of the time at this reporting is not known to have engaged in any 'hands outside pants butt play'

Well done 

[MIkeHoncho 1,930]

Time to revisit this one? 

 

[BurntOrange&White 39,934]

[NorthLoop 14,218]

<------ See avatar

[PassiveAggressiveCoach 118]

Payout to leave and go to rehab to save his family presser incoming.

[Longboard Horn 40,393]

 

[Longboard Horn 40,393]

 

[Pig Bellmont 8,719]

19 hours ago, WhatTheBuck said:

Did he fuck her? Did he even kiss her? No? This will pass in short order. Like any of his players will care.

I have a couple of friends who used to tend bar at a strip club. Her older sister and brother-in-law would visit. He’d buy her sister a lap dance and vice versa. (It’s a lot hotter when a stripper gives a lap dance to another woman.)

This was a restaurant. Har har har, we can all have a good laugh about it. But no one really cares. 

This looks like a bad take. Read that Athletic article for some perspective 

[C-Man 27,236]

Great read but a little unfair shot at Pete Carroll at the end- winning a super bowl should be a little better than comparison to Chip Kelly’s pro career or dismissed as “mixed results”

Agreed. Not to mention Carroll has spent a big majority of his coaching career in professional football. USC was kind of his anomaly.

[C-Man 27,236]

I don’t think the bar shit should have much bearing on whether Urban stays at J-ville or not. Just more evidence that he possesses no moral and is a turd of a human. I’m much more interested in the part of The Athletic article about him knocking off a couple days of work after their Thursday game to “see the grandkids.” Sorry, that shit doesn’t cut it when you’re winless to start the season. You get your ass back with the team and go to work fixing it.

[Horn Dog 9,883]

4 hours ago, notre dame joe said:

The whole situation stinks.

Probably, but it depends on the time of the month and level of hygiene.

[Gene Parmesan 4,008]

This is all funny because it just sheds more light on the fact that Urban is a POS, but Jacksonville already knew that.  They weren't hiring him to teach Sunday school.  Them looking to can him right now seems equally as dumb. 

[Native Horn 3,504]

They also didn't hire him to go 0-4 and then send the team on its way back to Jacksonville while he fucks around in Ohio.  

[PassiveAggressiveCoach 118]

15 minutes ago, Gene Parmesan said:

This is all funny because it just sheds more light on the fact that Urban is a POS, but Jacksonville already knew that.  They weren't hiring him to teach Sunday school.  Them looking to can him right now seems equally as dumb. 

Unless, they realized they made a horrible mistake after the hire and how it has gone. Maybe before they were like man we fucked up but we're locked into this contract. Now they could be like holy shit look what dropped into our laps as an ejection seat? Maybe. 

[closetohumping 17,453]

27 minutes ago, C-Man said:

I don’t think the bar shit should have much bearing on whether Urban stays at J-ville or not. Just more evidence that he possesses no moral and is a turd of a human. I’m much more interested in the part of The Athletic article about him knocking off a couple days of work after their Thursday game to “see the grandkids.” Sorry, that shit doesn’t cut it when you’re winless to start the season. You get your ass back with the team and go to work fixing it.

Agreed.  It's a guy that's already looking to duck out after 4 games.  Go back to tosu bud.

[PassiveAggressiveCoach 118]

Just now, Native Horn said:

They also didn't hire him to go 0-4 and then send the team on its way back to Jacksonville while he fucks around in Ohio.  

Technically he was poking around in Ohio. 

[Native Horn 3,504]

Just now, PassiveAggressiveCoach said:

Technically he was poking around in Ohio. 

Sorry, digital error.  My bad.

['stache 21,825]

Is infidelity really something that can break a "morality" clause in a contract? Seems like it really doesn't matter these days, and he didn't fuck her or anything, just let her rub up on him a bit and might have gotten a little outside the pants butthole rub. The staying in Ohio for a few days after a Thursday game also doesn't seem like a big deal to me, but if it really did break with coaching norms, then I guess he can get dressed down a bit for it, but not enough to break a contract. I find this all funny as hell, but don't see much coming of it, especially if he can start winning games. If they have another 1 win season, it'll come up in articles, but the real issue will be that he's not winning. If they were 4-0, everyone would be laughing it off in Jacksonville. They're more mad about the results on the field.

[PassiveAggressiveCoach 118]

Urban is tainted now.