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That ain't Shelley, Urban...

SarkAfterDark

By SarkAfterDark
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Since when is making fun of anti-vaxxers political? I thought that was just standard making fun of stupid people, which is what we do here. It's kind of the whole basis of this thread. 

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Guest Lobo

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7 minutes ago, dcar00 said:

"Working it hard for ya on the Downtown Stage, lets give it up for Caicooooooos Montanaaaaaaa!"

She likes me, she really really likes me.  
 

coming up to stage two, get twin sister “Anne Turks Montana!”  She’s working hard for you.  On stage three—-Guadeloupe Guatemala—-the isthmus Christmas…she’s working hard, let’s jingle those bells. 

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Francisco 2.0

Francisco 2.0 32395

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https://theathletic.com/2869792/2021/10/05/staples-no-trust-no-respect-no-wins-so-why-should-the-jaguars-have-any-confidence-in-urban-meyer/

 

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Jaguars owner Shad Khan doesn’t currently trust or respect coach Urban Meyer, but he remains confident in Meyer.

That is precisely what Khan said in his first public statement since Meyer was caught on video fondling a young woman (who most certainly isn’t his wife) while his wife — according to her Twitter feed — babysat their grandchildren Friday.

Here is Khan’s statement in full:

I have addressed this matter with Urban. Specifics of our conversation will be held in confidence. What I will say is his conduct last weekend was inexcusable. I appreciate Urban’s remorse, which I believe is sincere. Now, he must regain our trust and respect. That will require a personal commitment from Urban to everyone who supports, represents or plays for our team. I am confident he will deliver.

 

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So no to trust, no to respect but yes to confidence? That’s about as believable as this:

“There was a big group next to the restaurant,” Meyer said. “They wanted me to come over and take pictures, and I did. (They) tried to pull me out on the dance floor, screwing around, but I should’ve left.”

That was Meyer’s story when there was only one angle of video showing him on Friday at a restaurant in Ohio that bears his name. The second angle doesn’t show anyone pulling Meyer anywhere. His fingers are the ones taking action.

 

Spoiler

Khan had an opportunity to pull the ripcord Tuesday on a situation that wasn’t working well before this incident but now has no plausible path forward. Perhaps Khan’s attorneys advised him that firing Meyer for cause could get messy and potentially more expensive if Meyer took legal action. Instead, Khan chose to keep Meyer for now, a decision which necessitated a statement. That statement makes no sense, but how could it? Even the most skilled public relations wizard couldn’t provide a logical explanation for this decision. The only thing the Jaguars can say is, “Oh well. We’re keeping him.”

In college football, where Meyer won three national titles and is regarded as one of the best coaches in history, they pretend the sport is a morality play until a coach wins so much that he can commit amoral acts with impunity or a morally sound coach loses so much that he gets canned. The NFL isn’t like that. Unlike college football, which also is a multibillion-dollar business, NFL teams admit they’re part of a multibillion-dollar business. So let’s strip moral questions from this situation and look at it from a cold business perspective.

Meyer, whose team was 0-4 following a Thursday night loss at Cincinnati, does not seem to be adjusting well to the NFL, where he can’t follow one Bosa brother with another and then sign Chase Young to keep one position room stocked.

Jacksonville looked woefully underprepared in a season-opening loss to the Texans, who were supposed to replace the Jaguars as the cellar-dwellars of the AFC South. They didn’t look much better in a loss to the Broncos. After they gagged away a chance to win against the Cardinals, they played their best game against the Bengals. Rookie quarterback Trevor Lawrence didn’t throw any interceptions. The game plan seemed coherent. And the Jaguars still lost. Afterward, Meyer seemed mystified as to how his team could play so well and still not be able to crack the win column.

“It’s heartbreaking. That’s a heartbroken locker room,” Meyer said Thursday in Cincinnati. “So we’ve got to get them back. They get a few days off, and obviously we have to get ready for the Titans. Those are good people in that locker room, though.”

Instead of returning to Jacksonville with those good people and working to find a way to create that first win, Meyer decided he had better things to do with his time. Everyone should be able to have a life, and no one should begrudge anyone a visit with the grandkids. But Meyer chose to put himself in a situation — at a bar in a town where he is recognizable to a huge percentage of the population — where at the very least he would have gotten legitimate questions about why he wasn’t back at the office trying to figure out how to help the Jaguars convert a fourth-and-1. At worst? You’ve seen the video.

If we’re looking at this from the business side, Meyer wasn’t thinking of the company that pays him millions to perform at a time when his performance absolutely needs improvement. So how can he tell players they need to dedicate themselves to the pursuit of wins when he clearly can’t?

For one and only one reason, Meyer is lucky he’s in the NFL and not college football right now. As a college coach, he might have lost the locker room. And college players can tank to get rid of a coach they don’t trust or respect because they don’t have to worry about the next guy coming in and cutting most of them. NFL players won’t do that. Most can’t afford bad tape. So Meyer probably will get maximum effort from the Jaguars this week. Will that be good enough to beat the Titans, who lost to the Jets on Sunday? Recent history suggests no.

There also is the matter of Meyer’s history. He tends to manufacture a lot of his own chaos. At Florida, his program lacked discipline off the field, and the result was a series of arrests of his players. At Ohio State, Meyer repeatedly covered for an assistant accused of domestic abuse until he finally got called out on it publicly. The difference between those two stops and this one? The chaos came later, and the wins came sooner. In Jacksonville, Meyer pressed the self-destruct button before he could win enough games to provide cover for himself. That should set off alarm bells for Khan. Usually, this doesn’t happen until much later. So what fresh hell is around the corner?

And please, stop with the assumptions that Meyer is trying to get himself fired to take the USC job, which opened when Clay Helton was fired last month. Had USC wanted Meyer, it could have fired Helton after 2019 and hired Meyer. And if Meyer had any hope of coaching a premier college football team after this NFL experiment ends, he nuked it at the bar last Friday. So his best shot is to try to make it work in Jacksonville.

According to Khan, Meyer will have a chance to earn back the trust and respect of the Jaguars. Perhaps Meyer should start with his No. 1 overall draft pick, whose name he dragged into this mess on Monday during his apology. “I remember when Trevor told me he was going to Vegas for his bachelor party,” Meyer said. “I was like, ‘My gosh, man. Be careful. Surround yourself.’ Because I’ve seen this happen.”

Given their histories as public figures, Meyer probably should be seeking advice from Lawrence instead of giving it. Lawrence, for his part, should be incensed that Meyer would even utter his name in a discussion of a screw-up that is Meyer’s and Meyer’s alone. If Khan is seeking guidance going forward in this situation, Lawrence might be a good person to ask. As a top-pick QB with rare arm talent, he’s probably more important to the organization than anyone except the owner.

Besides, Lawrence probably will be around Jacksonville a lot longer than Meyer will. The trust and respect, according to the owner, are already gone. So how much longer can the confidence possibly last?

 

 

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Deej

Deej 76820

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2 minutes ago, lilMAC25 said:

And implied that everyone who wanted him gone was a racist….

 

 

other than that and being the worst HC in Texas history, he was a great dude.

If Strong was white, we may have fired him after his second season. 

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Francisco 2.0

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https://www.theonion.com/urban-meyer-still-adjusting-to-speed-of-nfl-cover-ups-1847802700

 

Apologizing to Jaguars fans for his early failures in leading the team, Jacksonville coach Urban Meyer admitted to reporters Tuesday that he is still adjusting to the speed of NFL cover-ups. “At the college level, these scandals take a lot longer to develop, and I’ll admit I just haven’t done the work to adjust my press strategy from Ohio State,” said Meyer, who explained that he was often able to shut down a damaging story or sweep a player’s transgressions under the rug with a single phone call while running a college program. “The NFL media ecosystem is just more complex than college, so I can’t run with the same simple denials I used in the past. I’m dealing with grown adults now, and lots of people have their own ideas that I can’t just override by throwing them off the team or threatening to take away a scholarship. Jaguars fans deserve a better level of cover-up than I’ve been providing, and I’m committed to learning and getting better.” At press time, Meyer had hired a former assistant from the Steelers so he could learn how they managed to sweep everything Ben Roethlisberger has done under the rug.

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aggie08

aggie08 21504

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1 hour ago, aggie08 said:

In his defense, meeting up with a sidepiece is orders of magnitude less shitty than bailing on dinner with his grandkids to get liquored up with college kids at the bar next door and gauging the comfort for butt stuff from a chick that he met 5 minutes ago.

 

1 hour ago, Rimbo said:

... no, and your moral compass is broken.

 

53 minutes ago, aggie08 said:

yeah ok sure

To expand on this, the pool of powerful people (people in general, really) who have had affairs is millions upon millions deep.

The pool of old fucks who can't make it through an entire meal with their grandkids without wandering to a nearby bar to grope some strange is probably (hopefully) much, much smaller.

That Urban would use the latter to try to excuse the former shows how broken and truly shitty a human being he is.

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coachherman'sgrill

coachherman'sgrill 2125

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Shit is going to start piling on him when more and more gets posted. You know there will be a trail leading back to them grinding at the local Best Western earlier this year.
And for me personally, the worst part is he blew off his grandkids. I couldn't imagine blowing my kid off like that.
I knew he was a turd when he straight up lied about not knowing what Zach Attack Smith was doing. Instead of stepping up and being a man, he stepped down and said not me.
Lastly, no social distancing or masks? That just isn't smart besides being a very public figure that is viewed as a God in Ohio, an NFL coach and he doesn't think every single thing he does in public won't be commented on?

For reals, leaving your grandkids for some women named after two geographical locations? Shit.....bag.

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Doc Reeves

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2 hours ago, OU Sucks said:

What a strangely-constructed argument:

image.png.81a980d9c019f925ee3af30e5f893f73.png

He improved the Buckeye program enormously. This is a far cry from adultery. HE HATES LOSING!

I guess this is what happens when you're a shit-for-brains OSU fan and try throwing all your thoughts into a post at once.


 

“Look guys, he has really a weak constitution and can’t handle the failures that are inevitable to every single team in sports and to a wider extent every human on Gods golden shore. So sure, he drinks heavily and womanizes while his grandkids are in the next room and countless strangers gawk at his strait up creepiness because that’s how healthy competitors deal with loss -Shit, not just competitors, I t’s just what people do. I mean, at least he’s not using a phony name like “Joey freshwater” or something (haha). He’s just sitting there as himself, in public, sliding his finger down the crack of a very young woman’s ass who’s not his wife. That takes a lot of confidence and integrity in my book.

I mean really, how was he supposed to handle losing? Have it strengthen his resolve, look inward at his process and perception then make appropriate, shrewd changes to better maximize the talent of both himself, staff and the professional athletes around him?? Come on…”

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ztejas

ztejas 43467

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30 minutes ago, coachherman'sgrill said:

Shit is going to start piling on him when more and more gets posted. You know there will be a trail leading back to them grinding at the local Best Western earlier this year.
And for me personally, the worst part is he blew off his grandkids. I couldn't imagine blowing my kid off like that.
I knew he was a turd when he straight up lied about not knowing what Zach Attack Smith was doing. Instead of stepping up and being a man, he stepped down and said not me.
Lastly, no social distancing or masks? That just isn't smart besides being a very public figure that is viewed as a God in Ohio, an NFL coach and he doesn't think every single thing he does in public won't be commented on?

For reals, leaving your grandkids for some women named after two geographical locations? Shit.....bag.

Maybe his grandkids suck.

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Guest Lobo

Guest Lobo

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Not sure whose idea it is, but apparently in the divorce...the "Urban Chophouse" will hereby be renamed, in Anglo tradition, "The Fist & The Starfish" 

Edited by Lobo
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Knighthawk

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36 minutes ago, coachherman'sgrill said:

Shit is going to start piling on him when more and more gets posted. You know there will be a trail leading back to them grinding at the local Best Western earlier this year.
And for me personally, the worst part is he blew off his grandkids. I couldn't imagine blowing my kid off like that.
I knew he was a turd when he straight up lied about not knowing what Zach Attack Smith was doing. Instead of stepping up and being a man, he stepped down and said not me.
Lastly, no social distancing or masks? That just isn't smart besides being a very public figure that is viewed as a God in Ohio, an NFL coach and he doesn't think every single thing he does in public won't be commented on?

For reals, leaving your grandkids for some women named after two geographical locations? Shit.....bag.

So social distancing and masks are a concern here?   CR much?   Jesus.   Didn’t see that coming but I guess expected given our fucked up ‘new normal’.  

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Guest Lobo

Guest Lobo

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Depending on your wing-span, you can still responsibly social distance and still get a sense of the barometric pressure of her undercarriage.  


"6 feet.  5 fingers.  2 holes.  1 intertwined soul.  Caymann---I'm in room 212" 

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Guest Lobo

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Posted
Posted (edited)

You know I love you, Shelley.

I wouldn't leave you.

It wasn't my fault.

I didn't betray you, honest. 

There was only booze to drink.

I had a flat tire.

I didn't have the Uber app update.

My Jaguars pullover didn't come back from the cleaners.

An old Tight End came in from out of town.

Someone stole my seat at the bar.

There was an earthquake.

A terrible flood.

Locusts. 

It wasn't my fault, I swear to God!!!

 

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