Official 2021 Bitch about family/Holiday Insanity

[cactusflinthead 27,598]

7 hours ago, G650 said:

I saw this sign yesterday and today on I-64 in Va.

Yeah, that confirms the post claim. Said it was Va.

[MissingInAction 25,036]

Thought I'd be spending today home alone, but a friend invited me to her family Xmas shindig and I accepted. She is recently divorced and drinking a bit but not out of control. 

On the drive we are talking about movies and she mentions Jennifer Lawrence,  and I say, "I'd like to tongue punch her fart box." 

Friend absolutely loses it. Laughed so hard I thought she might fall out of the car.

We get to the party and have some beers, and after a while she walks up to me red faced and giggling, "How would you like to tongue punch my fart box?" Then loses her shit. 

Thing is she has had a couple and thought she was whispering, which was not the case. 

There were several elder family members, all devout catholics, within earshot. Pearls were clutched as they took off in different directions muttering to everyone.

Told my friend to keep it down, everyone can hear you, but she DGAF. 

Good times.

[dcbc 14,471]

13 minutes ago, MissingInAction said:

Thought I'd be spending today home alone, but a friend invited me to her family Xmas shindig and I accepted. She is recently divorced and drinking a bit but not out of control. 

On the drive we are talking about movies and she mentions Jennifer Lawrence,  and I say, "I'd like to tongue punch her fart box." 

Friend absolutely loses it. Laughed so hard I thought she might fall out of the car.

We get to the party and have some beers, and after a while she walks up to me red faced and giggling, "How would you like to tongue punch my fart box?" Then loses her shit. 

Thing is she has had a couple and thought she was whispering, which was not the case. 

There were several elder family members, all devout catholics, within earshot. Pearls were clutched as they took off in different directions muttering to everyone.

Told my friend to keep it down, everyone can hear you, but she DGAF. 

Good times.

Seems like this story ended a bit early

[MissingInAction 25,036]

7 minutes ago, dcbc said:

Seems like this story ended a bit early

Once the joke made it to the kids and other younger members of the family everyone had a good laugh. 

[OrangEngr 1,035]

1 minute ago, MissingInAction said:

Once the joke made it to the kids and other younger members of the family everyone had a good laugh. 

[Wax Beer Cup 382]

6 hours ago, 4th&Five said:

Me to brother: Cardinals and Colts tonight should be good. 
 

Dad to everyone: I haven’t watched pro football since that guy took a knee. 

Few minutes later….

Me to brother: Played any golf lately?

Dad interrupts: You know Titleist won’t let you buy balls with “Let’s Go Brandon” printed on them?

Everyone: silence

My no politics / no Fox News shit rule worked very well for about 24 hours until we’re opening gifts this afternoon and mom gives dad some book about Hunter Biden. Of course he sees that as a sign to open the flood gates until I shut it down quickly. Just like I said at Thanksgiving, they just can’t help themselves any chance they get.  They never gave a shit about politics until well into retirement and Fox News started consuming their lives (no CR).  And does anyone really give enough of a shit about Hunter Biden to buy an ‘expose’ book on him? Back home now and life is good! 

[MissingInAction 25,036]

3 minutes ago, OrangEngr said:

Yea it sounded better in my head before typing it.

Edited December 26, 2021 by MissingInAction

[Leeroy Jenkins 2,402]

3 minutes ago, MissingInAction said:

Yea it sounded better in my head before typing it.

Well, did you?

[Parliament 14,255]

31 minutes ago, MissingInAction said:

Thought I'd be spending today home alone, but a friend invited me to her family Xmas shindig and I accepted. She is recently divorced and drinking a bit but not out of control. 

On the drive we are talking about movies and she mentions Jennifer Lawrence,  and I say, "I'd like to tongue punch her fart box." 

Friend absolutely loses it. Laughed so hard I thought she might fall out of the car.

We get to the party and have some beers, and after a while she walks up to me red faced and giggling, "How would you like to tongue punch my fart box?" Then loses her shit. 

Thing is she has had a couple and thought she was whispering, which was not the case. 

There were several elder family members, all devout catholics, within earshot. Pearls were clutched as they took off in different directions muttering to everyone.

Told my friend to keep it down, everyone can hear you, but she DGAF. 

Good times.

I'm not good with women, but she mighta been flirting.  Not sure.

[MissingInAction 25,036]

8 minutes ago, Parliament said:

I'm not good with women, but she mighta been flirting.  Not sure.

Nah, she just thought it was really funny and couldn't stop repeating it.

She was going around asking people if they'd ever tongue punched a fart box. 

Edited December 26, 2021 by MissingInAction

[Rimbo 25,919]

This isn't a complaint in the sense of "wah I don't like my in-laws/relatives wah wah."

My father-in-law has been dying of inoperable bone marrow cancer since... oh, six years now? He's at the point now where his body is no longer making its own blood, and he survives on blood transfusions, at least until such time as they can no longer find a match. (Blood typing gets harder and harder the more transfusions you have.)

My wife's Christmas present this morning was a call from the nursing home that they found him on the floor this morning. He'd fallen, and his back hurt.

This has been a strain on my wife over the past several years, to say the least. I'm not happy that my Mom passed away, but seeing what she's going through now, I'm glad Mom passed away relatively quickly. Not this endless slow drain that's been plaguing my wife with her dad.

[Biff Tannen 45,673]

2 hours ago, MissingInAction said:

Nah, she just thought it was really funny and couldn't stop repeating it.

She was going around asking people if they'd ever tongue punched a fart box. 

My disappointment in you is vast. 

[millhouse 2,604]

2 hours ago, MissingInAction said:

... Jennifer Lawrence,  and I say, "I'd like to tongue punch her fart box"...

I read your story atleast 4 times. First I thought JL was at the party and was proud of your boldness. Next I was disappointed thinking this might be another aniston "cornholeing" type story. Then I was curious as to if you took your friend up on the offer. And last of all, most of all, I was disappointed in the lack of pictures.

[G650 14,249]

8 hours ago, cactusflinthead said:

Yeah, that confirms the post claim. Said it was Va.

We apparently have some creative types down at VDOT that come up with these things, it's been a thing for a few years now.

This was my all time favorite, I legit laughed when I saw it.

[Doc Reeves 6,434]

On 12/22/2021 at 2:40 PM, Pato del Muerto said:

San Antonio holla

[Doc Reeves 6,434]

Still relevant to my experiences

[GhostOfTomJoad 9,324]

Not a family bitch, but like clockwork, it's time for an appliance to shit the bed.

The dishwasher (Bosch, about 10 years old) decided to die today. I just ordered a replacement unit after spending a grand total of 10 minutes researching it and hoping like fuck it will be installed before NYE but realizing it will probably be February.

My bigger concern is that the dishwasher that shit the bed 10 years ago was the canary in the coal mine. Within 12 months we also replaced 3 other appliances. I'd give @Brisketexan left nut for an avocado colored appliance set like I grew up with that would run for 30 fucking years.

[Archer 474]

A few weeks ago I found out my dad is in prison when my wife went to verify his address to send a Christmas card…

[Wax Beer Cup 382]

1 hour ago, Archer said:

A few weeks ago I found out my dad is in prison when my wife went to verify his address to send a Christmas card…

Now that’s the way to close down the holiday weekend on this thread! Kudos to you my good man. 

[G650 14,249]

11 hours ago, GhostOfTomJoad said:

The dishwasher (Bosch, about 10 years old)

Great, now I have to worry about this.

[wd40 1,976]

13 hours ago, GhostOfTomJoad said:

Not a family bitch, but like clockwork, it's time for an appliance to shit the bed.

The dishwasher (Bosch, about 10 years old) decided to die today. I just ordered a replacement unit after spending a grand total of 10 minutes researching it and hoping like fuck it will be installed before NYE but realizing it will probably be February.

My bigger concern is that the dishwasher that shit the bed 10 years ago was the canary in the coal mine. Within 12 months we also replaced 3 other appliances. I'd give @Brisketexan left nut for an avocado colored appliance set like I grew up with that would run for 30 fucking years.

not to derail, and I can't speak for Bosch (ze Germanz make everyzing komplicatit), but dishwashers are really not that hard to work on. mostly just uncomfortable.  or call Todd at AMS to see if it's really kapoot.  dude can fix anything, and for a reasonable price.

but to your point, you need to realize that a dishwasher nowadays is just a sterilizer.  with low water pressure mandates, it ain't scrubbing shit, so you'll extend it's life if you minimize the debris you ask it to grind/filter.

[G650 14,249]

Well, cosmic retribution got me for telling everyone how nice Thanksgiving was. This was the first year in a long time that we had a big group for various reasons, and I was almost sure my aunt was going to be looney, but lo and behold everyone was actually on their best behavior. So apparently we had to pay the piper at Christmas.

 

My brother and SIL are always 50/50 on whether they can keep their shit together, and this time the SIL couldn't. Apparently they had some drama on the way up to the house in Gloucester Va. we spend the holidays at, as I'm hanging out starting to cook dinner and next thing I know my 4 year old nephew just pops up in the house unannounced. When I ask where his parents are the response is the SIL is going to be dropped off at her mothers house, so I think to myself 'well here we go'. About an hour later they show back up and SIL is still in truck. My brother is actually pretty on top of it this year thankfully so it's not completely idiotic. Anyhoo, my poor mother has to go out to the truck and sit with her for like 30 minutes to hear whatever delusional sob story. After a spell SIL manages to come into the house and at least not be outwardly terrible, if not contributing one iota to the proceedings.

So that was the first half. After the usual child wrangling/haranguing/yelling to go to bed on Christmas Eve (my son is 5 and as mentioned nephew is 4), by about 10pm we are finishing setting up the Santa gifts. My dog is 13 years old now, and can't really go up and down the stairs, so he has to sleep downstairs. Given that my wife and I usually sleep in the loft on the 3rd floor, we decided I would crash on the couch with him so I could let him out to pee in the middle of the night since we wouldn't hear him upstairs. Not a big deal as I like to sleep on a couch to be honest. So after some up and down and a midnight pee, the dog is finally sleeping pretty soundly about 2 am. Which means I get into a sound sleep about 3am. Then low and behold at 4am, I hear padding little feet coming down the stairs. WTF. I sit up to see my nephew looking at me in the dark. I ask him what is up, and his response is "I told mommy I wanted to open presents and she said 'well just get up then'". Jesus tapdancing Christ woman, you just cut a 4 year old loose in the middle of the night in a 3 story house?! Thank god I was down on the couch, which she had no idea of, who knows what he would have gotten into. Knife drawer, appliances, fell off a balcony, or wandered out of the house into the woods... So at this point I'm up. Thankfully my mother heard us downstairs and came down to help wrangle.

Eventually everyone else starts getting up. My son and wife get up about 630 and come down, and the cousins play with all their loot. The SIL wanders down at like 10 and goes "oh we already opened presents?" Uh yeah dumbass. And then proceeds to tell her son that he can't have the jelly beans he is eating as the first thing for breakfast, to which my thoughts are why start parenting now, and it's actually not his breakfast because we fed him a waffle 3 hours ago. Also, we don't exchange gifts with all the adults, we draw one name out of a hat. Well SIL drew mine. She brought it in the house without a stitch of wrapping when they got there and just set it under the tree for me to "open" on Christmas morning.

[Scheiss Meister 8,407]

Both sides of our family are pretty chill, so no family drama at the get-togethers yet.  My BIL (wife's brother) may change that next weekend, but I'll burn that bridge if I get to it.  No, the real drama is that this is my excellent father-in-law's last Christmas (fuck cancer in the ass) and most likely the same for my mother-in-law and my dad.  They're all in their late 80's, so it's not a surprise, just sad.  They all enjoy their children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren so much, and Covid is putting a clamp on that, along with the slow decline of aging.  Slow, painful drama sucks.

[MNLonghornFUKM 8,817]

Hosted Christmas for my fam on Christmas Eve, hosted wife’s family Christmas Day. I sent some food home with my sisters fam and my parents because we over spent on meatballs and marinara. Whatever.


Make a Mississippi roast for her family on Christmas Day so I have 2 days worth of leftovers. Yum. Wrong. My brother in law and sister in law, wife’s side, came over again yesterday because wife has cousins from out of town in town. Whatever. But Sister in law starts eating our leftovers from the fridge from Christmas Day.


Now I’m down beef and cheesy potatoes during this blizzard I’m in

[Kennythetiger 9,377]

4 hours ago, G650 said:

 Also, we don't exchange gifts with all the adults, we draw one name out of a hat. Well SIL drew mine. She brought it in the house without a stitch of wrapping when they got there and just set it under the tree for me to "open" on Christmas morning.

[G650 14,249]

8 minutes ago, Kennythetiger said:

[T’Boo Ted Marshall 2,732]

Well, cosmic retribution got me for telling everyone how nice Thanksgiving was. This was the first year in a long time that we had a big group for various reasons, and I was almost sure my aunt was going to be looney, but lo and behold everyone was actually on their best behavior. So apparently we had to pay the piper at Christmas.
 
My brother and SIL are always 50/50 on whether they can keep their shit together, and this time the SIL couldn't. Apparently they had some drama on the way up to the house in Gloucester Va. we spend the holidays at, as I'm hanging out starting to cook dinner and next thing I know my 4 year old nephew just pops up in the house unannounced. When I ask where his parents are the response is the SIL is going to be dropped off at her mothers house, so I think to myself 'well here we go'. About an hour later they show back up and SIL is still in truck. My brother is actually pretty on top of it this year thankfully so it's not completely idiotic. Anyhoo, my poor mother has to go out to the truck and sit with her for like 30 minutes to hear whatever delusional sob story. After a spell SIL manages to come into the house and at least not be outwardly terrible, if not contributing one iota to the proceedings.

So that was the first half. After the usual child wrangling/haranguing/yelling to go to bed on Christmas Eve (my son is 5 and as mentioned nephew is 4), by about 10pm we are finishing setting up the Santa gifts. My dog is 13 years old now, and can't really go up and down the stairs, so he has to sleep downstairs. Given that my wife and I usually sleep in the loft on the 3rd floor, we decided I would crash on the couch with him so I could let him out to pee in the middle of the night since we wouldn't hear him upstairs. Not a big deal as I like to sleep on a couch to be honest. So after some up and down and a midnight pee, the dog is finally sleeping pretty soundly about 2 am. Which means I get into a sound sleep about 3am. Then low and behold at 4am, I hear padding little feet coming down the stairs. WTF. I sit up to see my nephew looking at me in the dark. I ask him what is up, and his response is "I told mommy I wanted to open presents and she said 'well just get up then'". Jesus tapdancing Christ woman, you just cut a 4 year old loose in the middle of the night in a 3 story house?! Thank god I was down on the couch, which she had no idea of, who knows what he would have gotten into. Knife drawer, appliances, fell off a balcony, or wandered out of the house into the woods... So at this point I'm up. Thankfully my mother heard us downstairs and came down to help wrangle.

Eventually everyone else starts getting up. My son and wife get up about 630 and come down, and the cousins play with all their loot. The SIL wanders down at like 10 and goes "oh we already opened presents?" Uh yeah dumbass. And then proceeds to tell her son that he can't have the jelly beans he is eating as the first thing for breakfast, to which my thoughts are why start parenting now, and it's actually not his breakfast because we fed him a waffle 3 hours ago. Also, we don't exchange gifts with all the adults, we draw one name out of a hat. Well SIL drew mine. She brought it in the house without a stitch of wrapping when they got there and just set it under the tree for me to "open" on Christmas morning.

Ginny strikes again.

[WhatTheBuck 28,776]

17 hours ago, Archer said:

A few weeks ago I found out my dad is in prison when my wife went to verify his address to send a Christmas card…

‘That’s my story and I’m sticking to it, officer.’

[Guest]

Wife is talking with me and our 23YO son, just shooting the shit before we go out to eat.

"Two sets of kids at school lost their parents over the Christmas holidays."

"Hide-and-seek championship round?"

"Now Slorch, how would you have felt if your dad died when you were in 5th grade?"

"Like I got 2 extra years?"

Son just bursts out laughing, "Wrong guy to ask."

[Moby Ric 2,058]

Not a bitch about my family session.  But it has been a really stressful Christmas here.

Where to begin?  Lets do my side of the family.  My mother had surgery a year ago for a malignant lump in her leg and has been in recovery for a long time.  Turns out the wound is not healing right and a new lump has formed which is keeping the original wound from healing.  The Wednesday before Christmas I got to go down to MD Anderson to discuss options with her Drs.  Turns out the best option is to remove her leg.  So Merry Christmas mom.

Second, Christmas eve dinner at the MIL's house with our family.  The BIL can't make it down, MIL response was I don't want to discuss it was enough to tell us it is not good.  Turns out the BIL's ex moved in, and they are fighting and if he leaves to come down to visit she is going to take all his shit and bail for the hundredth time.  He never learns.  Undefeated I guess.

CW's parents our divorced and dad lives in Shreveport.  Christmas morning while opening presents the wife is getting texts from step mom.  FIL is having chest pains and in the ER.  FIL is admitted and is having open heart surgery today to fix the blockage.  Merry Christmas!!

So in summation.  Two parents having life changing surgeries this week.  Wife got on a plane yesterday to Shreveport to handle her dad.  I am going to be in Houston the latter half of this week to help out with my family.  It has been a Christmas to remember.

[Pato del Muerto 52,489]

I suppose you wouldn’t omit from the story if your mom’s name happened to be Eileen. 

Edited December 28, 2021 by Pato del Muerto

[EE2B 1,565]

Not a bitch about my family session.  But it has been a really stressful Christmas here.
Where to begin?  Lets do my side of the family.  My mother had surgery a year ago for a malignant lump in her leg and has been in recovery for a long time.  Turns out the wound is not healing right and a new lump has formed which is keeping the original wound from healing.  The Wednesday before Christmas I got to go down to MD Anderson to discuss options with her Drs.  Turns out the best option is to remove her leg.  So Merry Christmas mom.
Second, Christmas eve dinner at the MIL's house with our family.  The BIL can't make it down, MIL response was I don't want to discuss it was enough to tell us it is not good.  Turns out the BIL's ex moved in, and they are fighting and if he leaves to come down to visit she is going to take all his shit and bail for the hundredth time.  He never learns.  Undefeated I guess.
CW's parents our divorced and dad lives in Shreveport.  Christmas morning while opening presents the wife is getting texts from step mom.  FIL is having chest pains and in the ER.  FIL is admitted and is having open heart surgery today to fix the blockage.  Merry Christmas!!
So in summation.  Two parents having life changing surgeries this week.  Wife got on a plane yesterday to Shreveport to handle her dad.  I am going to be in Houston the latter half of this week to help out with my family.  It has been a Christmas to remember.

We can have someone run over and comfort your wife for you while she’s in Shreveport. We need pictures first to determine if it’s going to be @markstanco , @rpspeed , or myself.

[Ten Bears 2,481]

22 hours ago, G650 said:

 

You already had one didn't you?

[ABSR 5,309]

1 hour ago, Moby Ric said:

Not a bitch about my family session.  But it has been a really stressful Christmas here.

Where to begin?  Lets do my side of the family.  My mother had surgery a year ago for a malignant lump in her leg and has been in recovery for a long time.  Turns out the wound is not healing right and a new lump has formed which is keeping the original wound from healing.  The Wednesday before Christmas I got to go down to MD Anderson to discuss options with her Drs.  Turns out the best option is to remove her leg.  So Merry Christmas mom.

Second, Christmas eve dinner at the MIL's house with our family.  The BIL can't make it down, MIL response was I don't want to discuss it was enough to tell us it is not good.  Turns out the BIL's ex moved in, and they are fighting and if he leaves to come down to visit she is going to take all his shit and bail for the hundredth time.  He never learns.  Undefeated I guess.

CW's parents our divorced and dad lives in Shreveport.  Christmas morning while opening presents the wife is getting texts from step mom.  FIL is having chest pains and in the ER.  FIL is admitted and is having open heart surgery today to fix the blockage.  Merry Christmas!!

So in summation.  Two parents having life changing surgeries this week.  Wife got on a plane yesterday to Shreveport to handle her dad.  I am going to be in Houston the latter half of this week to help out with my family.  It has been a Christmas to remember.

Well, if nothing else take it to heart that you will be a leg up on next year!

[Player 4,575]

I suppose you wouldn’t omit from the story if your mom’s name happened to be Eileen. 

What the fuck is wrong with you, you heartless bastard?












Her name is Peg.

[rpspeed 1,363]

8 hours ago, EE2B said:

We can have someone run over and comfort your wife for you while she’s in Shreveport. We need pictures first to determine if it’s going to be @markstanco , @rpspeed , or myself.

I do have a saltgrass gift card I need to use

[HornPhD 1,368]

We’re at my SIL’s house for a few days.   She’s been getting into whiskey over the past year or so. 

[Js1 85,310]

9 hours ago, HornPhD said:

We’re at my SIL’s house for a few days.   She’s been getting into whiskey over the past year or so. 

This looks like my mom's house.  She and my stepdad weren't big drinkers, but they had stocked liquor cabinets and wine shelves/fridges.  Now that he's passed, it's really going to waste because she doesn't host people at the house by herself anymore.  I've been bringing those cardboard wine caddies from HEB over and leaving with 3 or 4 filled up with wine, champagne and liquor. 

[luke duke 6,412]

This looks like my mom's house.  She and my stepdad weren't big drinkers, but they had stocked liquor cabinets and wine shelves/fridges.  Now that he's passed, it's really going to waste because she doesn't host people at the house by herself anymore.  I've been bringing those cardboard wine caddies from HEB over and leaving with 3 or 4 filled up with wine, champagne and liquor. 

You’re such a great son.

[NeverMarryAStripper 21,898]

Bumping this thread for some nonholiday family bitching.  A week and a half ago my 91 year old mother, who lives alone, fell and hit her head in the middle of the night.  I found her the next morning pretty much unresponsive.  I called an ambulance and she was transported to Memorial Hermann hospital in Memorial City.  They finally got around to doing a CT scan of her head and found bleeding.  For reasons that I won't go into here, she is now at Methodist Hospital in the Medical Center,  She is in Neuro ICU with two holes in her skull and a drain tube that drips fluid out of her head.  The four siblings, one of our nieces, and my mom's little sister have been rotating out sitting with her.  She has also tested positive for covid.  All of this entails numerous rules around how many people can visit at once and what protective gear has to be worn while visiting.  We have a group message thread going to share information about my mom.  My oldest sister and the aunt are die-hard QAnon, the election was stolen, Greg Abbot is a liberal commie nutjobs.  So of course the message thread has degenerated to nothing but those two bitching about the rules and spouting off about their nutjob internet conspiracy theories.  I'm beginning to understand why people murder their families.

Edited August 1, 2022 by NeverMarryAStripper

[Parliament 14,255]

46 minutes ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

Bumping this thread for some nonholiday family bitching.  A week and a half ago my 91 year old mother, who lives alone, fell and hit her head in the middle of the night.  I found her the next morning pretty much unresponsive.  I called an ambulance and she was transported to Memorial Hermann hospital in Memorial City.  They finally got around to doing a CT scan of her head and found bleeding.  For reasons that I won't go into here, she is now at Methodist Hospital in the Medical Center,  She is in Neuro ICU with two holes in her skull and a drain tube that drips fluid out of her head.  The four siblings, one of our nieces, and my mom's little sister have been rotating out sitting with her.  She has also tested positive for covid.  All of this entails numerous rules around how many people can visit at once and what protective gear has to be worn while visiting.  We have a group message thread going to share information about my mom.  My oldest sister and the aunt are die-hard QAnon, the election was stolen, Greg Abbot is a liberal commie nutjobs.  So of course the message thread has degenerated to nothing but those two bitching about the rules and spouting off about their nutjob internet conspiracy theories.  I'm beginning to understand why people murder their families.

Probably should edit that out.  Just in case...

[DalTxHornFan 3,101]

16 minutes ago, Parliament said:

Probably should edit that out.  Just in case...

 

[nnm 36,360]

2 hours ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

Bumping this thread for some nonholiday family bitching.  A week and a half ago my 91 year old mother, who lives alone, fell and hit her head in the middle of the night.  I found her the next morning pretty much unresponsive.  I called an ambulance and she was transported to Memorial Hermann hospital in Memorial City.  They finally got around to doing a CT scan of her head and found bleeding.  For reasons that I won't go into here, she is now at Methodist Hospital in the Medical Center,  She is in Neuro ICU with two holes in her skull and a drain tube that drips fluid out of her head.  The four siblings, one of our nieces, and my mom's little sister have been rotating out sitting with her.  She has also tested positive for covid.  All of this entails numerous rules around how many people can visit at once and what protective gear has to be worn while visiting.  We have a group message thread going to share information about my mom.  My oldest sister and the aunt are die-hard QAnon, the election was stolen, Greg Abbot is a liberal commie nutjobs.  So of course the message thread has degenerated to nothing but those two bitching about the rules and spouting off about their nutjob internet conspiracy theories.  I'm beginning to understand why people murder their families.

Very sorry about your mom. I lost my dad to Alzheimer’s last year and am taking care of mom now. It’s a hard season of life. 

[royiv 9,285]

2 hours ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

Bumping this thread for some nonholiday family bitching.  A week and a half ago my 91 year old mother, who lives alone, fell and hit her head in the middle of the night.  I found her the next morning pretty much unresponsive.  I called an ambulance and she was transported to Memorial Hermann hospital in Memorial City.  They finally got around to doing a CT scan of her head and found bleeding.  For reasons that I won't go into here, she is now at Methodist Hospital in the Medical Center,  She is in Neuro ICU with two holes in her skull and a drain tube that drips fluid out of her head.  The four siblings, one of our nieces, and my mom's little sister have been rotating out sitting with her.  She has also tested positive for covid.  All of this entails numerous rules around how many people can visit at once and what protective gear has to be worn while visiting.  We have a group message thread going to share information about my mom.  My oldest sister and the aunt are die-hard QAnon, the election was stolen, Greg Abbot is a liberal commie nutjobs.  So of course the message thread has degenerated to nothing but those two bitching about the rules and spouting off about their nutjob internet conspiracy theories.  I'm beginning to understand why people murder their families.

I would just drop those two from the group text. It will be better for your mental and cardiac health.

[Sawbonz 27,546]

On 12/27/2021 at 8:37 AM, G650 said:

She brought it in the house without a stitch of wrapping when they got there and just set it under the tree for me to "open" on Christmas morning.

[Knoxtnhorn 5,974]

Damn.  Aug 1st?  We - of the crazy family members clan - are slipping.

My aforementioned SIL, who hasn't worked in over 2 years because of some b.s. *ADA/disability claim has been trying to convince my wife to go to New Orleans with her over Christmas.  I don't give a shit, but 2 things...

1. SIL doesn't have a job.  Tha fuck is she planning vacations when she's living one?

2. They want to fly down in the morning, and fly back that evening.  I told my wife this was just about the stupidest thing I've ever heard.

She stopped by yesterday.  My youngest asked her if she'd help him find a Lego for a set he's building.  She replied, rather loudly, "NO!  I've got a migraine.  You're lucky I'm still standing."  

Sorry.  Not a great post.  Just venting a bit.  I planned a cabin trip over Thanksgiving.  Yesterday, my wife hinted at inviting her sister.  I think the response of, "Absolutely fucking not" should suffice.  Hoping the message got through.

*Rehash.  She called in sick so much as a pharmacist, that her company offered to let her work from home.  Still too much for her.  She found a doctor that "diagnosed" her with some sort of throat condition which forbids her from talking.  So, for 2 years, she's lived off the high percentage of income that the ADA forces her employer to pay her while she's "disabled".  Not my business except for that she shows up at my house and yaps for hours.

Edited October 13, 2022 by Knoxtnhorn

[El Tri 412]

16 hours ago, Knoxtnhorn said:

Damn.  Aug 1st?  We - of the crazy family members clan - are slipping.

My aforementioned SIL, who hasn't worked in over 2 years because of some b.s. *ADA/disability claim has been trying to convince my wife to go to New Orleans with her over Christmas.  I don't give a shit, but 2 things...

1. SIL doesn't have a job.  Tha fuck is she planning vacations when she's living one?

2. They want to fly down in the morning, and fly back that evening.  I told my wife this was just about the stupidest thing I've ever heard.

She stopped by yesterday.  My youngest asked her if she'd help him find a Lego for a set he's building.  She replied, rather loudly, "NO!  I've got a migraine.  You're lucky I'm still standing."  

Sorry.  Not a great post.  Just venting a bit.  I planned a cabin trip over Thanksgiving.  Yesterday, my wife hinted at inviting her sister.  I think the response of, "Absolutely fucking not" should suffice.  Hoping the message got through.

*Rehash.  She called in sick so much as a pharmacist, that her company offered to let her work from home.  Still too much for her.  She found a doctor that "diagnosed" her with some sort of throat condition which forbids her from talking.  So, for 2 years, she's lived off the high percentage of income that the ADA forces her employer to pay her while she's "disabled".  Not my business except for that she shows up at my house and yaps for hours.

I hope for your manhood and fatherhood you ripped her a new one. 

[BHMCruiser 1,813]

On 12/25/2021 at 10:10 AM, 956 Worldwide said:

Not family, but our downstairs neighbor texted my wife at 0830 as we were opening and putting together presents for our early elementary aged kids to complain that he could hear them playing. Merry Christmas.
 

He’s a total chump who texts her because he would never have the balls text me or even come knock on the door. Dickhead is lucky they aren’t in the “wake up at 0430 on Christmas” stage anymore. 

In my first apartment in Boston post-college, we had a family with kids above us. They had one kid who was the loudest thing I have ever heard in my entire life. It sounded like a fucking deer was running loose in the apartment, knocking over furniture. Gadunk gadunk gadunk WHAM gadunk gadunk gadunk WHAM - ALL day long. Finally after a month or so I went up to address it and knocked on the door. A very small, presumably Indian, woman opened the door and she just looked completely exhausted, and behind her was the fattest, sweatiest, most rambunctious toddler I have ever seen to this day. He looked like a bowling ball covered in vaseline just looking for shit to smash. The woman looked at me almost like "you are no doubt here to complain about the noise made by my son, who may as well a pet bear," and I just told her I had the wrong apartment and apologized for intruding. 

No point, just I'm glad your kids have fun and tell your neighbor to eat a fucking dick, or buy a top floor condo. 

[Gil Bang 25,944]

1 hour ago, BHMCruiser said:

In my first apartment in Boston post-college, we had a family with kids above us. They had one kid who was the loudest thing I have ever heard in my entire life. It sounded like a fucking deer was running loose in the apartment, knocking over furniture. Gadunk gadunk gadunk WHAM gadunk gadunk gadunk WHAM - ALL day long. Finally after a month or so I went up to address it and knocked on the door. A very small, presumably Indian, woman opened the door and she just looked completely exhausted, and behind her was the fattest, sweatiest, most rambunctious toddler I have ever seen to this day. He looked like a bowling ball covered in vaseline just looking for shit to smash. The woman looked at me almost like "you are no doubt here to complain about the noise made by my son, who may as well a pet bear," and I just told her I had the wrong apartment and apologized for intruding. 

No point, just I'm glad your kids have fun and tell your neighbor to eat a fucking dick, or buy a top floor condo. 

oh shit what a funny post.