Tell Me About Texas a&m

[MrPhlegm 3,413]

Well, I watched the dragon landing and noticed something that ought to piss off aggy wankers like swandered dfigs looch hamm iii. aggy is so hotshit leading edge sciencywise and all and the most important thing about the dragon capsule wasn't MAROON! JESUS SHIT FUCKING DICKS aggy WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED? WHERE WERE THE MAROON CHUTES? No maroon drogues no maroon mains? Did the fucking sips switch em out before launch? In fact no maroon anything. AND WHERE THE FUCK WERE THE SEC SEC SEC LABELS?

FAIL aggy FAIL FAIL FAIL

poor aggy.

[Wiler77 1,577]

On 1/26/2019 at 11:31 PM, Henry Hill said:

No surprise here. One of the biggest pieces of shit on Texags, txjortsagent, is an even bigger piece of shit in real life:

Damon Dean Robertson is a Cunt

Texags has and still worships this ass hat for reasons we’ll never know. 

I have no idea how I missed this post.  No surprise is right.  That guy is a Grade A douchebag, and Rivalries posters worshiped him. I haven't posted or lurked there in years, but I remember his posts reeking of superiority and condescension.  I get that it was Rivalries, but his posts were different than other trash talking (which could be quite funny), and there was always something I couldn't put my finger on.  Like he was overcompensating.  Then out of the blue TexAgs starts putting him on their radio program and sent him to Aggy's first SEC media days.  I remember he spent an inordinate amount of time trying to troll Texas fans by making 80% of his random interview questions about the Longhorns.  It was at that point that I questioned if that guy even had a job, much less was a lawyer.  He looked like a bowling alley cashier and he posted ALL THE TIME.  And then he finds time to do TexAgs radio and go to SEC media days, where all he could talk about was Texas.  This all makes so much sense.  I hadn't thought about him in years, but this really brightened my day.

 

[OnAComputer 1,405]

3 hours ago, Neonmoon said:

Maybe someone in the 995 world will write an article to document this insane racist clown, his history, his continual pretending to be a longhorn saying racist shit at recruits, etc. 

Will Baizer? Eric Nahlin? Scipio?

Already did it.

[ztejas 43,547]

44 minutes ago, Wiler77 said:

I have no idea how I missed this post.  No surprise is right.  That guy is a Grade A douchebag, and Rivalries posters worshiped him. I haven't posted or lurked there in years, but I remember his posts reeking of superiority and condescension.  I get that it was Rivalries, but his posts were different than other trash talking (which could be quite funny), and there was always something I couldn't put my finger on.  Like he was overcompensating.  Then out of the blue TexAgs starts putting him on their radio program and sent him to Aggy's first SEC media days.  I remember he spent an inordinate amount of time trying to troll Texas fans by making 80% of his random interview questions about the Longhorns.  It was at that point that I questioned if that guy even had a job, much less was a lawyer.  He looked like a bowling alley cashier and he posted ALL THE TIME.  And then he finds time to do TexAgs radio and go to SEC media days, where all he could talk about was Texas.  This all makes so much sense.  I hadn't thought about him in years, but this really brightened my day.

 

Oh c'mon. Who hasn't lapsed in $23k of child support payments?

Wearing jorts is the unforgivable part of the story. 

[Cairn Horn88 8,285]

13 hours ago, Machinator said:

.....and this is The Primary Reason why aggy left for the sec.  They believed this would hurt UT by remaining in the B12 and boost their relevance by pairing with Bama and the Big Boys.  They would get rich and we'd melt like the Wicked Witch of the West.  Fuck them all.

[Valmy77 13,273]

9 minutes ago, Cairn Horn88 said:

.....and this is The Primary Reason why aggy left for the sec.  They believed this would hurt UT by remaining in the B12 and boost their relevance by pairing with Bama and the Big Boys.  They would get rich and we'd melt like the Wicked Witch of the West.  Fuck them all.

It was a bold strategy. It was just delusional. 

Though now being in the SEC provides an excellent excuse for failure as well as evidence of success. Kind of a win-win.

[MrPhlegm 3,413]

.....and this is The Primary Reason why aggy left for the sec.  They believed this would hurt UT by remaining in the B12 and boost their relevance by pairing with Bama and the Big Boys.  They would get rich and we'd melt like the Wicked Witch of the West.  Fuck them all.

Nope nope nope nope.

You gotta remember who sent aggy to sec hell. The man with TWO Rice degrees. The man who's eyes were opened to the heinousness of aggy while at Rice and who came to hate aggy with the fiery heat of tenthousand suns.

The man who knew how aggy would behave and befoul themselves on the larger sec sec sec stage.

Now regular aggy mouthbreathers believe as you do but the man that pulled the trigger and sent aggy to sec sec sec KNEW it would be a fucking disaster as it has been just as he in his TWO Rice degrees intended.

This man, my hero, who knew he would have to pull off a humdinger to top Dana Xenophon Bible's greatest practical joke evah the invention of the 12man hiding under the stands turditition of aggy and he did and aggy has been megasharting themselves on a larger stage ever since.

[MrPhlegm 3,413]

It was a bold strategy. It was just delusional. 
Though now being in the SEC provides an excellent excuse for failure as well as evidence of success. Kind of a win-win.

It wasn't delusional it was diabolical. Rice is some smart smart hilariously evil motherfuckers.

[Machinator 32,099]

So... which one of you is this?

 

[TreatyOak 16,428]

[TexasTroll 454]

6 hours ago, CoTex said:

State science Olympiad is in aggy town.

My child is in.

F. Me.

 

6 hours ago, Dennis Taylor said:

Alchemy or Cold Fusion division?

Composting Toilet Research Division

[C-Man 27,285]

1 hour ago, Cairn Horn88 said:

.....and this is The Primary Reason why aggy left for the sec.  They believed this would hurt UT by remaining in the B12 and boost their relevance by pairing with Bama and the Big Boys.  They would get rich and we'd melt like the Wicked Witch of the West.  Fuck them all.

Somebody remind me how aggy "saved the Big 12" again?

[MAUFRAIS 6,642]

I think by refusing to join the pac 10?

[Scholz 11,967]

5 minutes ago, C-Man said:

Somebody remind me how aggy "saved the Big 12" again?

[Valmy77 13,273]

10 minutes ago, C-Man said:

Somebody remind me how aggy "saved the Big 12" again?

By derailing the PAC 16 deal. I am actually kind of thankful they did that...to the extent they did I am not exactly sure how that went down. I thought they threatened to go to the SEC if we all went to the PAC 10 and Texas chickened out because Dodds and company did not want to be seen as ending the rivalry.

Also people gave us lots of money to not go to the PAC 10. So there is that.

Edited March 8, 2019 by Valmy77

[Randolph Duke 4,034]

1 hour ago, Cairn Horn88 said:

.....and this is The Primary Reason why aggy left for the sec.  They believed this would hurt UT by remaining in the B12 and boost their relevance by pairing with Bama and the Big Boys.  They would get rich and we'd melt like the Wicked Witch of the West.  Fuck them all.

aggy hasn’t even had consecutive seasons with a winning record in conference play for 20+ years. It doesn’t matter who they are paired up against, A&M football isn’t taken seriously by anyone but aggys. Nothing about a team with that record of irrelevance can control the fortunes of other programs.

[ztejas 43,547]

56 minutes ago, Machinator said:

So... which one of you is this?

 

I don't know but he has some explaining to do 

[TrashMaster G 17,630]

1 hour ago, MrPhlegm said:

Nope nope nope nope.

You gotta remember who sent aggy to sec hell. The man with TWO Rice degrees. The man who's eyes were opened to the heinousness of aggy while at Rice and who came to hate aggy with the fiery heat of tenthousand suns.

The man who knew how aggy would behave and befoul themselves on the larger sec sec sec stage.

Now regular aggy mouthbreathers believe as you do but the man that pulled the trigger and sent aggy to sec sec sec KNEW it would be a fucking disaster as it has been just as he in his TWO Rice degrees intended.

This man, my hero, who knew he would have to pull off a humdinger to top Dana Xenophon Bible's greatest practical joke evah the invention of the 12man hiding under the stands turditition of aggy and he did and aggy has been megasharting themselves on a larger stage ever since.

Quit saying this like it's really a thing.

[Leanderman 2,277]

Sometimes true pleasure  is not telling someone to go to hell, but getting them to enjoy the ride.

[SHOOTER12 8,833]

6 hours ago, Armybrat said:

And the SEC could put the Horns in the East division so aggy would never have to play us. Lulz

Here's a hilarious scenario, although quite fictitious. Put the horns in the same division as aggy and see how many years of getting their ass kicked it takes for them to run from that conference to another one. You know it'll happen with those bunch of wods.

[SHOOTER12 8,833]

7 hours ago, Leanderman said:

Talk is cheap. Those sheep f@ckers have nothing else to do on a Friday morning than talk about "What Ifs".

Good God I had to drive through Bryan today, and listening to maggot radio all the scenarios about how they were going to compete for a national championship because they and Alabama were both going to go 11-1 for the season with Alabama's only loss being to aggy therefore they would play in the playoffs and win the national championship.

I listened to that crap for about 30 minutes and immediately upon arriving at the hotel in San Antonio sought out the maintenance man and borrowed a soldering iron from him. I then came back to my room plugged it in and stabbed myself in the face repeatedly in order to clear my mind of aggy.

Edited March 8, 2019 by SHOOTER12

[SHOOTER12 8,833]

4 hours ago, MrPhlegm said:

7 hours ago, SwanderedTalent said:

it really is a Don Draper/Michael Ginsberg dynamic-- I wouldn't say I "don't think about" A&M at all, because it's a source of both irritation and amusement. Like having an infected tattoo of a clown on your arm, you can't help but look, and scratch, and laugh. But I don't think about anything Texas does in terms of how it compares to A&M. 

Read more  

You have an infected tattoo of Baggins on your arm? Damn looch I knew you were hard core uh red ass but damn. Better go see a chiropracter and get an adjustment.

 

4 hours ago, MrPhlegm said:

Do you giggle like a little girl aftee you post shit like this Danny boy?
 

 

4 hours ago, MrPhlegm said:

6 hours ago, SwanderedTalent said:

2014 NCAA Footballs is based on the 2013 teams. Texas A&M was int he SEC on 2013. I beat t.u. 122-0 with that A&M team. WHAT MORE PROOF YOU WANT

Tee hee hee eh Danny?

 

3 hours ago, MrPhlegm said:

4 hours ago, SwanderedTalent said:

God, y'alls stupid.
College football was all fine and dandy from about 1919 through 1939. Before that it was all eastern schools and liberals cheating, but in 1919 it got fair and equitable and the best team always won, except for some years t.u. cheated too bad. Then, WWII happened. Schools like The Army, The Navy, and Texas A&M had to win the war against commanism. We done did that. But it kilt so many Aggies to defeat Hitler that our football program was dessamated hintered fucked up fora long time. We was so bad off that we had to let girls in and make the whole NCAA limit scholarships to stop t.u. and we done did that and the impact was shown immediatley in 1984, which is when college football's modern era temporarily started until it stopped in 1998 because the Big 12 negatively impacted TExas A&M University because of t.u. 
Something had to be done to level the playing field in our favor again. And that something was the HUndred Years Decision to go to the SEC SEC SEC where the rules are even and everyone plays fair. So the modern era started back up again in 2012 and it really picked up in 2018 when we hired the only coach in all of Division I to have won a national championship at Florda State. 
I guess technically it ain't started up yet in college basketball or baseball

Read more  

Fuck off Dfigs.

Dang Phlegm...you're in love aren't you? lol...

[HtownHorn 14,788]

aggy barely beat La Tech, who ironically had a very Big 12 like offense. The only team they faced until the Cotton Bowl that had a Big 12 offense. To say aggy would have gone undefeated in 2012 is fucking moronic.

Kansas State was 11-2

TT was 8-5

Texas was 9-4

Baylor was 8-5

Oklahoma State was 8-5

Oklahoma was 10-3

aggy also played 2 FCS teams in 2012.

[Cairn Horn88 8,285]

2 hours ago, TreatyOak said:

That girl in the bottom left needs to have on a long rubber glove.  She has work to do.

[LTtxfan 49,377]

Jimbo trying to learn about his sec brethren....

Texas A&M: Ole Miss senior defensive analyst Ishmael Aristide will join the Aggies’ defensive staff, sources tell FootballScoop.

[Cairn Horn88 8,285]

1 hour ago, Randolph Duke said:

aggy hasn’t even had consecutive seasons with a winning record in conference play for 20+ years. It doesn’t matter who they are paired up against, A&M football isn’t taken seriously by anyone but aggys. Nothing about a team with that record of irrelevance can control the fortunes of other programs.

I'm not so sure aggy really cares, even though they paid a coach $7.5M/yr, as long as they finish 7-5 or better.  They feel they are in the Garden of Eden, money rolling in, bigger-stadium-than-Texas, more students than Texas, larger crowds than Texas, get to advertise at the Austin airport, show up at SXSW and tell everybody about aggy, get to play on tv every Saturday, get to lose to Bama.....little things like this.  They are a happy bunch.  Have to win it all?  Nah.

[HtownHorn 14,788]

19 minutes ago, LTtxfan said:

Jimbo trying to learn about his sec brethren....

Texas A&M: Ole Miss senior defensive analyst Ishmael Aristide will join the Aggies’ defensive staff, sources tell FootballScoop.

At least Jimbo doesn't practice ageism.

[ztejas 43,547]

Current uber driver is wearing aggy polo, aggy cap, aggy ring, aggy vanity band on his apple watch, cargo shorts, blue polarized sunglasses.

The small talk is as painfully boring as you might well imagine. 

Nice guy, though. Very... simple.

[Leanderman 2,277]

'Current uber driver is wearing aggy polo, aggy cap, aggy ring, aggy vanity band on his apple watch, cargo shorts, blue polarized sunglasses.'

Glad to see the aggy network worked out for him so well.

[dingleberryswitzer 2,724]

You should have pretended to be a fellow ag.  Make up some bill shit about how proud you are to see an ag making a good honest living.   Talk about beating Bama that one time.  

[Whatever 700]

Good God I had to drive through Bryan today, and listening to maggot radio all the scenarios about how they were going to compete for a national championship because they and Alabama were both going to go 11-1 for the season with Alabama's only loss being to aggy therefore they would play in the playoffs and win the national championship.
I listened to that crap for about 30 minutes and immediately upon arriving at the hotel in San Antonio sought out the maintenance man and borrowed a soldering iron from him. I then came back to my room plugged it in and stabbed myself in the face repeatedly in order to clear my mind of aggy.

So the radio was talking to you in the wrong tone?

[SHOOTER12 8,833]

16 minutes ago, Whatever said:

3 hours ago, SHOOTER12 said:

Good God I had to drive through Bryan today, and listening to maggot radio all the scenarios about how they were going to compete for a national championship because they and Alabama were both going to go 11-1 for the season with Alabama's only loss being to aggy therefore they would play in the playoffs and win the national championship.
I listened to that crap for about 30 minutes and immediately upon arriving at the hotel in San Antonio sought out the maintenance man and borrowed a soldering iron from him. I then came back to my room plugged it in and stabbed myself in the face repeatedly in order to clear my mind of aggy.

Read more  

So the radio was talking to you in the wrong tone?

Abso-damn-lutely...Can your mama sew?

[Whatever 700]

Abso-damn-lutely...Can your mama sew?

She can and she'll also fix you up with a waaaa burger and some french cries.

[The University 851]

37 minutes ago, dingleberryswitzer said:

You should have pretended to be a fellow ag.  Make up some bill shit about how proud you are to see an ag making a good honest living.   Talk about beating Bama that one time.  

i've actually done this in the past. it's pretty fucking hilarious how they'll nod in agreement to completely made up anti-tu bullshit. my shin was sore for a week from my wife kicking it over and over. worth it.

[Spawn of Cthulhu 2,241]

1 hour ago, dingleberryswitzer said:

You should have pretended to be a fellow ag.  Make up some bill shit about how proud you are to see an ag making a good honest living.   Talk about beating Bama that one time.  

Tell him about how you lost your ring. Maybe he'll help you buy a new one.

[ChickenSandwich 9,855]

8 hours ago, Enchubben said:

I actually don't know if it would happen that easy. The SEC got the perfect candidate in A&M, somebody that wouldn't challenge the premier teams in the conference already, but a team that would open the border of Texas to recruit.  Aggy also has a huge (and ever-growing) alumni base due to their nonexistent admission standards which means a lot of eyeballs on watching the television which is good for TV contract negotiations.   Texas would have been a great option, and obviously as a whole is on an entirely different level than aggy, but what does including Texas in the SEC offer, now that they already claim TX.

Would TCU actually have been more dangerous than Aggy in the SEC? Dallas and SMU cheerleaders >>>>>>>> than cow town. They would have been a better fit but a real contender to change the paradigm where as Aggy is not. 

[MrPhlegm 3,413]

Quit saying this like it's really a thing.

It IS really a thing. Lets see, brainpower behind fishcamp brainwashing. The brainpower of a slug. Now compare the brainpower at Rice where our hero got not one but two degrees. He got away from aggy in 3 years. Degree with highest honors in physics in 1970. Requirements for graduating from aggy with highest honors in 1970? Being able to deduce which hand the marble is in correctly 2 out of 3 times.

He went to Rice, a much more prestigeous school than aggy, for his masters in physics. He got his masters in 3 years at Rice and continued on to get his doctorate at Rice in two more years. Five years at Rice. Seems he enjoyed it.

While he was a student at Rice a mob of corpse turds, enraged by The M.O.B.'s lighthearted and mildly humerous half time poking gentle fun at aggy marching style and aggy's fleabitten brain damaged mutt, laid siege to The M.O.B. forcing them to remain under the stands until bread trucks were dispatched to rescue the besieged band members. The bread truck drivers told the foaming at the mouth aggy that they had to make a delivery of hot dog buns and the aggy rubes believed them and The M.O.B. was saved. Four days later HPD told the aggy laying siege that The M.O.B. was no longer in the stadium and aggy left. Soon to be Dr. Loftin experienced this and being a loyal Rice student vowed to avenge The M.O.B.

"By Sammy's Wings
By the suns of William Marsh Rice
You shall be avenged!"
Loftin cried.

And so Loftin and his fellow Rice students cooked up a plan to lay the heinous aggy low.

Loftin spent two more years at Rice obtaining his doctorate in physics and then put the plan into motion.

And here we are. Double Rice graduate has fucked aggy but good. This you cannot deny.

Loftin is not aggy. He is a Rice man through and through.

Proof? Well if Loftin was aggy, when The M.O.B. insulted the precious if he was aggy he would have boycotted Rice in solidarity with all aggy everywhere.

This he DID NOT DO. Ergo sum Big Red Soda, Loftin ain't aggy and did his damndest to screw aggy over.

TRUTH MOTHERFUCKER, DO YOU SPEAK IT?

Hell no you don't. Typical aggy you are. Don't you have a goat anus to felch aggy boy?

Run along back to texags sheepfucker you have no power here. And fuck right off.

As always OU sucks.

[MrPhlegm 3,413]

Sometimes true pleasure  is not telling someone to go to hell, but getting them to enjoy the ride.

Truth. Praise Loftin!

[MrPhlegm 3,413]

Good God I had to drive through Bryan today, and listening to maggot radio all the scenarios about how they were going to compete for a national championship because they and Alabama were both going to go 11-1 for the season with Alabama's only loss being to aggy therefore they would play in the playoffs and win the national championship.
I listened to that crap for about 30 minutes and immediately upon arriving at the hotel in San Antonio sought out the maintenance man and borrowed a soldering iron from him. I then came back to my room plugged it in and stabbed myself in the face repeatedly in order to clear my mind of aggy.

Sirius dude! It is a godsend for transvering the mindless wastelands along the Brazos.

[MrPhlegm 3,413]

Dang Phlegm...you're in love aren't you? lol...

Tee hee hee.

[MrPhlegm 3,413]

i've actually done this in the past. it's pretty fucking hilarious how they'll nod in agreement to completely made up anti-tu bullshit. my shin was sore for a week from my wife kicking it over and over. worth it.

I used to do that with aggy on my tram. Tell em I was glad to see fellow Texans and butter em up a bit and theyd be smiling and all, tell em we were like brothers cause I was Longhorn alum. Hook'em and enjoy the park. (Couldn't throw up the horns cause it upsets the ferigner guests.) Usually got frowns.
Lulz have a magical day!

[Bruh Man 3,160]

 

[Leanderman 2,277]

"You should have pretended to be a fellow ag.  Make up some bill shit about how proud you are to see an ag making a good honest living.   Talk about beating Bama that one time.  "

It will all be fun and games, till he breaks out the jizz jar and offers you a sip.

[Topper13 3,390]

7 minutes ago, Leanderman said:

"You should have pretended to be a fellow ag.  Make up some bill shit about how proud you are to see an ag making a good honest living.   Talk about beating Bama that one time.  "

It will all be fun and games, till he breaks out the jizz jar and offers you a sip.

[BigHorn'13 3,387]

1 hour ago, Bruh Man said:

 

So SXSW ends on the 17th and this shit splatter all over ABIA won't be finished until the 24th?

Sounds about right. 

[Homesickhorn 2,208]

Jimbo trying to learn about his sec brethren....
Texas A&M: Ole Miss senior defensive analyst Ishmael Aristide will join the Aggies’ defensive staff, sources tell FootballScoop.

Yeah, like we (Ole Miss) have been lights out on defense as of late. All we’ve prayed for has been a shootout for the last decade. Even aggy can’t be that stu.....

Actually, never mind.

[Guest]

14 hours ago, Leanderman said:

Sometimes true pleasure  is not telling someone to go to hell, but getting them to enjoy the ride.

Oh they are quite joyous about it.

That's part of the payoff when the carts roll off the last hill on the  coaster each and every season, regardless of sport.

[markstanco 12,629]

Would TCU actually have been more dangerous than Aggy in the SEC? Dallas and SMU cheerleaders >>>>>>>> than cow town. They would have been a better fit but a real contender to change the paradigm where as Aggy is not. 

The SEC got more than a foot in the door to texas recruits by inviting aggy. They also got a ton of TV viewership and an athletic program that is zero threat to win anything.

They couldn't have picked a better school.

[Randolph Duke 4,034]

13 minutes ago, markstanco said:

The SEC got more than a foot in the door to texas recruits by inviting aggy. They also got a ton of TV viewership and an athletic program that is zero threat to win anything.

They couldn't have picked a better school.

Eyeballs are not what advertisers covet. They want demographics. aggy will attract advertisers such as Yeti and Walmart to a fan base of 500,000 alumni in a geographic area Yeti and Walmart are already heavily advertising to in order to attract the LSU fans. 

The big problem for A&M is they need to grow their “t-shirt” base to increase their advertiser demographics, and becoming an aggy t-shirt fan is rare because their freak show of a culture is so off-putting to so many people. 

Whatever aggy can ever deliver to SEC coffers has already been delivered. If the conference wants to grow revenues, Texas A&M is not part of that equation. 

[SwanderedTalent 5,761]

I like how buying advertising signage is a "takeover"

where have I heard that before

Edited March 9, 2019 by SwanderedTalent