Tell Me About Texas a&m

[Pimphand 5983]

Spider rote a pome:

My classes just begun at Collin County Community Collage and I allready got a assinement in my Creative Riting class. I suppose to come up with a originale pome all my own.As you tsips now, aint much else Spider can thank off exsept the big game this weakend between the fightin Texas Aggies and the Noter Dame. So hears what I come up with...

Look Out Noter Dame

Look out Irish, Look out Noter Dame.
Perpair to loose this football game.

I laff at you domers that boast off tradition.
We the ones with bonfire and tunnel vision.

You may have the golden dome and the Cathlick Pope.
We has maroon karrots and a fullback on dope.

You may have NCs and Highsmens to boot.
We has boy cheerleeders in ice cream sutes.

You may have the 4 horsmen and a fella name Gipper.
We has 4H Clubs and 300 pound strippers.

You may have Newt Rockny and that old Irish luck.
We has RC Slocum and the seckrataries he's (bin frendly with).

You may laff at our shaved heads and our hick overalls.
Just wate till we bend over and skweeze our aggie balls.

You may mock us and you may tease us.
But we goeing to turd on touchdown Jesus.

gig'em

[MontereyMX 873]

2 hours ago, Jiggy-Z said:

Is that like the old "I just voted for Jesse Jackson" bit from Eddie Murphy?

maybe he can get a hold of Case M and a few more.   They could sign as well.  

[RomaVicta 30035]

17 hours ago, coachherman'sgrill said:

 

Yeah, I don’t understand the reasoning why a home night game is such a deal breaker?

[coachherman'sgrill 2315]

14 hours ago, WelfareBuysMyWeed said:

I would pay good money to see somebody dig up the bones of the dead dogs under the stadium and arrange them into the shape of "27-25". And then leave a stack of topped over lincoln logs next to it. And castrate Johnathan Manziel.

How much we talking???

[coachherman'sgrill 2315]

You’ve all been warned but the replies are pretty funny 

https://texags.com/forums/5/topics/3512746

[coachherman'sgrill 2315]

In my turkey, mashed potatoes, etc. stupor I kept thinking why ag thinks their 12th man and night home game was such an impact, and after reading below, I think I get it. 
The crowd noise at night is a metric that can’t really be quantified. The ones that do count, like win/loss or conference championships and “nattys” are easy to point to and are pretty easy to understand. But, since those wildly accepted metrics don’t bear ag reasoning, they can point to the 12th man or a night game as some weighted indicator for success, looking at you Graham. Even though the actual numbers and stat lines don’t support their argument. 
What I’m saying is ags don’t like reality and would rather say their the loudest or “muh stadium” rather than conference champs

[Hornius Emeritus 12495]

3 hours ago, Pimphand said:

Spider rote a pome:

My classes just begun at Collin County Community Collage and I allready got a assinement in my Creative Riting class. I suppose to come up with a originale pome all my own.As you tsips now, aint much else Spider can thank off exsept the big game this weakend between the fightin Texas Aggies and the Noter Dame. So hears what I come up with...

Look Out Noter Dame

Look out Irish, Look out Noter Dame.
Perpair to loose this football game.

I laff at you domers that boast off tradition.
We the ones with bonfire and tunnel vision.

You may have the golden dome and the Cathlick Pope.
We has maroon karrots and a fullback on dope.

You may have NCs and Highsmens to boot.
We has boy cheerleeders in ice cream sutes.

You may have the 4 horsmen and a fella name Gipper.
We has 4H Clubs and 300 pound strippers.

You may have Newt Rockny and that old Irish luck.
We has RC Slocum and the seckrataries he's (bin frendly with).

You may laff at our shaved heads and our hick overalls.
Just wate till we bend over and skweeze our aggie balls.

You may mock us and you may tease us.
But we goeing to turd on touchdown Jesus.

gig'em

This was the greatest post in the history of Longhorn forums.  I laughed so freakin' hard. I called my dad and read it to him (giving him the proper context of course) and when he heard "perpair to loose this football game" he almost ruptured a kidney.

 

 

Edited 3 hours ago by Hornius Emeritus

[Hornius Emeritus 12495]

 

 

 

[ATXbronco 4108]

29 minutes ago, coachherman'sgrill said:

In my turkey, mashed potatoes, etc. stupor I kept thinking why ag thinks their 12th man and night home game was such an impact, and after reading below, I think I get it. 
The crowd noise at night is a metric that can’t really be quantified. 

 

Absolutely.  They beat Alabama with their home/night crowd!
You can't say their stadium doesn't get extreme loud. 

The 12th man spiel won that game for A&M and it'll get even louder and more obnoxious tomorrow night!
We might not be able to afford another slow start tomorrow.

 

[Sawbonz 27681]

If they are so loud why are they bringing in field level speakers 

[Steamboat1874 4091]

3 minutes ago, Sawbonz said:

If they are so loud why are they bringing in field level speakers 

Send a manager to unplug those mother fuckers when no one is looking.

[Sawbonz 27681]

5 minutes ago, Steamboat1874 said:

Send a manager to unplug those mother fuckers when no one is looking.

Wire cutters 

[Cap33 394]

6 minutes ago, Steamboat1874 said:

Send a manager to unplug those mother fuckers when no one is looking.

Screw unplugging them -- just take garden shears and cut the cords. Check in the mail on Monday.

Edit: @Sawbonz and I think alike.

Edited 2 hours ago by Cap33

[Hagbard Celine 10955]

9 minutes ago, Steamboat1874 said:

Send a manager to unplug those mother fuckers when no one is looking.

[Hagbard Celine 10955]

21 hours ago, TrashMaster G said:

 

we've won 10 true road games in a row which is the longest active streak in fbs

game times are determined by the broadcast contract owner as we have painfully dealt with for the past 15 years

sec true road games at night since the aggy temper tantrum (i.e. joining the sec and trying to burn down the rig on the way out):

12 @ klan W 66-31

21 @ pig L 21-40

23 @ gump W 34-24

sec true road games we have played since we joined the league this year

24 @ vandy

24 @ pig

the sec has had 2 opportunities to schedule us at night on the road

we should have already played an additional league game (home? road?) but the 8-game cowards own that fact not us - aggy can bitch at them

precisely which game(s) do the aggy fucktards suggest should have been moved to the morning or afternoon the days we went to nashville and fayettenam in order to prevent the creation of this BRAND NEW LESS THAN A MONTH OLD aggy "fact" that has morphed in to existence now that the number of true road sec games we have played has increased to MULTIPLE (i.e. more than one) opportunities to prove the eSipN KoNsPeArCeE!

this "fact" is now almost 2 weeks old

those raised in or converted to the faith of the brethren have a web 1.0 site to help them reprogram: https://www.exmormon.org/

aggy who need to be cleansed of fishcamp programmnig have a new, modern wiki to help them reprogram: https://aggypedia.com/

advantage: aggy

 

[Hagbard Celine 10955]

20 hours ago, DFW Horn said:

Tell me more about aggy "outshining" The University. When did that actually happen?

OUTSHINING is ILLEGAL!!!

it's in the TEXAS CONSTITUTION!!!!!

for posterity and in the event the petition goes away here is the text of the change.org petition as of this moment 29nov24

https://www.change.org/p/remove-the-texas-longhorns-from-the-southeastern-conference-sec?recruiter=1358854032&recruited_by_id=b549ce10-adba-11ef-9e48-73e46da0aab2&utm_source=share_petition&utm_campaign=share_for_starters_page&utm_medium=copylink

The Issue

As a passionate advocate for the integrity of the Southeastern Conference (SEC), I, like many of us, find the inclusion of the Texas Longhorns deeply concerning. For many, they have become a giant blight on what the SEC symbolizes, leading to an intention of a petition to exclude them from the SEC altogether. The Longhorns inclusion into the conference transgresses the fundamental values of the SEC – a place of fair play and integrity (occasionally).

The Longhorns are a major cancer to the conference:

    Contributing heavily to the implosion of previous conferences.
    Interfering with other SEC teams championship runs thru slimy back-door methods.
    Delaying games and endangering players by throwing  their dildos and baby bottles onto the field during game action.
    Paying off officials to give preferential treatment during sporting events. Evidence is everywhere. Just ask coaches and fans from Georgia, Oklahoma, Vanderbilt, Mississippi State, Texas A&M, or any other highly respected University.
    Having a “snowflake” fan base that cannot take a joke and/or a simple “horns down” gesture without crying.
    Studies show a large contingent of support for both Joe Biden and Kamala Harris among current Longhorn students and the vast majority of Longhorn alumni.

The inclusion of the Texas Longhorns has heavily tainted this great conference and brings an unprecedented challenge towards preserving our beloved SEC's integrity.

Therefore, we are urging the Southeastern Conference organization to hear the voices of those committed to preserving its integrity. We implore you to consider the consequences of the Texas Longhorns participation and to re-evaluate their position within the Southeastern Conference. Show your commitment to fair play and maintaining the enthusiasm of true fans by removing the Texas Longhorns from the SEC.

Sincerely,

SEC Fans Everywhere

[Hagbard Celine 10955]

kevin mar from omaha nebraska just signed

[Jkwellborn 6761]

Screw unplugging them -- just take garden shears and cut the cords. Check in the mail on Monday.
Edit: [mention=20]Sawbonz[/mention] and I think alike.

We are talking about aggy here. Just get the things wet.

[The_highest_of_fives 633]

19 hours ago, OU Sucks said:

That's hilarious that they think they can get 100k people to fake support that. They are currently sitting at an impressive 35 signatures, including Jack Me off, Aggie is Retarded and JizzJar OldArmy

Cackling as the names scroll by.  Remember change.org helps verify signatures are from real people