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Tell Me About Texas a&m

MrPhlegm

By MrPhlegm
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Longboard Horn

Longboard Horn 40,317

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My undergrad alma mater, A&M Commerce aka East Texas State will start FCS play next season. Hello Southland Conference! Here's our schedule. We're probably gonna be a punching bag for a few years, but at least we're not playing aggy. Don't know why we're playing Houston Baptist twice unless that's a typo. 

FJjoRXIVIAUtyAk?format=jpg&name=large

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utee94

utee94 15,817

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Dickerson is full of shit.  He was for sale to the highest bidder no matter what.  It just turned out that SMU offered him significantly more than the price of a gold Trans Am.

That doesn't mean he didn't find male cheerleaders to be weird, I'm sure he did.  I'm sure pretty much all athletes do.  But business is business.

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Vertigo

Vertigo 20,277

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7 minutes ago, utee94 said:

Dickerson is full of shit.  He was for sale to the highest bidder no matter what.  It just turned out that SMU offered him significantly more than the price of a gold Trans Am.

That doesn't mean he didn't find male cheerleaders to be weird, I'm sure he did.  I'm sure pretty much all athletes do.  But business is business.

Is aggy the only school in existence where banging cheerleaders is cause for concern?

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Wax Beer Cup

Wax Beer Cup 382

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On 1/29/2022 at 8:48 PM, Longboard Horn said:

Story time: I used to work with the blonde girl on the left. She went to Alabama. She goes with her fiancé (who is an Aggie, big mistake on her part) to the Aggy-Bama game in college station last year. Instead of wearing her Alabama stuff like a good alum and fan, she jumps ship and is all decked out in aggy gear… She was even celebrating when aggy beat Bama. What the actual fuck?!

23B2B42A-8693-4A86-87BC-19894FB63646.jpeg

Is that 12th Man sign thing really sponsored by Valero?  I know we’ve whored out a lot of things over the years, but don’t think I’ve ever seen an ad on the official longhorn insignia. 

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Longboard Horn

Longboard Horn 40,317

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7 hours ago, utee94 said:

Dickerson is full of shit.  He was for sale to the highest bidder no matter what.  It just turned out that SMU offered him significantly more than the price of a gold Trans Am.

That doesn't mean he didn't find male cheerleaders to be weird, I'm sure he did.  I'm sure pretty much all athletes do.  But business is business.

In an interview he told his grandmother that he didn’t want to go to aggy after the boosters gave him the gold trans am. Lol he took their bribe and ran! 

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utee94

utee94 15,817

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2 minutes ago, Longboard Horn said:

In an interview he told his grandmother that he didn’t want to go to aggy after the boosters gave him the gold trans am. Lol he took their bribe and ran! 

Oh yeah for sure.  I mean, how were the ags going to get it back from him, anyway?  They couldn't afford raise a stink about it and draw attention to it.

So sad, that their cheater boosters got double-crossed by a cheater recruit.  My heart weeps.

 

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bolverk

bolverk 29,671

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5 hours ago, Wax Beer Cup said:

Is that 12th Man sign thing really sponsored by Valero?  I know we’ve whored out a lot of things over the years, but don’t think I’ve ever seen an ad on the official longhorn insignia. 

 

32 minutes ago, Longboard Horn said:

Yes it’s sponsored by Valero

Look closer: It's 2th Man (sponsored by Valero).

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Deej

Deej 76,762

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1 hour ago, utee94 said:

Oh yeah for sure.  I mean, how were the ags going to get it back from him, anyway?  They couldn't afford raise a stink about it and draw attention to it.

So sad, that their cheater boosters got double-crossed by a cheater recruit.  My heart weeps.

 

They weren't really bothered. aggy enjoys getting fucked in the ass.

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ShaggyBevo RIP

ShaggyBevo RIP 3,868

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On 1/23/2022 at 8:30 PM, Homesickhorn said:


I might be a slow learner, but don’t discount the fact that aggy stupidity was apparent to even us as soon as they made their 100 Year decision.
*Growing up a Longhorn fan filled with aggy and ou hatred probably hastened me screaming it from the rooftops when they joined.
Trust me, they/we get it.

SEC went Jeff Gillooly in the first 10 years.

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Randolph Duke

Randolph Duke 4,034

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36 minutes ago, RabidM said:

It's be a shame if someone did a forensic audit of those PPP funds. 

Never. Gonna. Happen.

Hell, even Tom Brady got 7-figures for one of his marketing companies.

The anger from publishing the list of well-known political contributors whose myriad of companies received ungodly sums would topple our government.

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MontereyMX

MontereyMX 869

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4 minutes ago, Randolph Duke said:

Never. Gonna. Happen.

Hell, even Tom Brady got 7-figures for one of his marketing companies.

The anger from publishing the list of well-known political contributors whose myriad of companies received ungodly sums would topple our government.

what is the problem with that scenario?

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Chopper

Chopper 17,230

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On 1/29/2022 at 7:48 PM, Longboard Horn said:

Story time: I used to work with the blonde girl on the left. She went to Alabama. She goes with her fiancé (who is an Aggie, big mistake on her part) to the Aggy-Bama game in college station last year. Instead of wearing her Alabama stuff like a good alum and fan, she jumps ship and is all decked out in aggy gear… She was even celebrating when aggy beat Bama. What the actual fuck?!

23B2B42A-8693-4A86-87BC-19894FB63646.jpeg

I just noticed they're in front of a Clayton Williams Jr memorial. aggy co-eds are officially encouraged to relax and enjoy it, if rape is inevitable.

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Deej

Deej 76,762

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2 hours ago, Chopper said:

I just noticed they're in front of a Clayton Williams Jr memorial. aggy co-eds are officially encouraged to relax and enjoy it, if rape is inevitable.

Co-eds got nothing to worry about. Livestock, on the other hand...

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Randolph Duke

Randolph Duke 4,034

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3 hours ago, Longboard Horn said:

aggy_brazzers.jpg

500,000 alumni and not a single one is intellectually capable of solving the mystery of exactly which game the aggy yell leader tradition was originated.

Such an esteemed research university, imbued with a such a sense of history and tradition, and not one of those redneck fuckers has a clue about the actual history or tradition of their culture.

$1,000,000 cash is a lot of money for a trade school grad living in a tract home in Katy, driving a leased Ram pic-em-up truck. Yet not one of them was educated to the level necessary to understand which of the five home games their cringeworthy turdition was originated.

My offer to pay any aggy who can identify which 1907 game football game their yell leader turdition originated $1,000,000 has remained unclaimed for years. My guess is that it will never be claimed. There isn't an aggy alive who could figure out the mystery of which of the five football games such an important part of aggy culture originated. That doesn't say much about the quality of the aggy edumacation.

One in five chance, aggys. Come on, you dumbfuck rednecks. One out of five shot to win $1,000,000 and not a single aggy has been smart enough to identify the right game. Unlimited guesses. One out of five chance. And not a single aggy has figured it out.

That says a lot about the true value of the "aggy experience." They are complete dumbfucks.

 

The Story:

When A&M was an all-male military college in 1907, students often invited guests from Texas Women’s University to take the train to College Station and attend Aggie football games. Then as now, only a certain number of guest tickets were available, and these would be handed out based on seniority, so freshmen were rarely able to bring guests to the games.

According to legend, the Aggies were being out-scored so badly during one football game that the TWU students were threatening to leave the game due to boredom. To prevent this, the upperclassmen ordered the freshmen, or “fish,” to find a way to entertain their guests.  The freshmen raided a janitor’s closet and changed into the white coveralls they found there and began leading the crowd in yells from the track area in front of the stands. The freshmen got so much attention from the students of TWU that it was decided that only upperclassmen would be allowed to participate in this entertainment in the future.

Source: https://yell.tamu.edu/

The Clues

The year was 1907

It was a home football game

The Aggies were being badly outscored

One in five chance of getting it right, unlimited guesses, and not a single aggy has come close. And not a single aggy ever will.

The people of Texas deserve better than Texas A&M.

aggy_ralph copy.jpg

Edited by Randolph Duke
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