Texas Recruiting Notes 2025: Duck Around and Find Out

[BachelorTrek 3,031]

On 3/24/2024 at 7:24 AM, MontereyMX said:

https://funknwaffles.com/menu/.  

he will destroy the Jive Turkey!

That place is in Syracuse? 

Sheeeet! I don't take trips to Ice Planet Hoth.  Lulz.

[ClubWhatever 12,145]

4 hours ago, Ricky's one-hitter said:

With that context, choosing to recruit Russell now shows they've watched his development and can more confidently project his growth into something they want to work with. He's not nearly as polished of a thrower, but Russell's ceiling is significantly higher than Lacey's, even in Sark's offense. Also, Dakorien Moore. 

So what are they waiting for to offer?

[texifornia 56,998]

28 minutes ago, BurntOrange&White said:

Marsh was on campus for an UOV

Meh

[ousux 5,597]

It's not that complicated.
Lacey is committed, so it's fair to say the staff like him a lot compared with other options. He's also a QB prospect from a region where talent rarely leaves. If you honestly think he could be your QB of the future when given the chance to take his commitment, you take it, and with it, the opportunity to influence his visits.
Russell is an ascending, in-state QB prospect with a prototype build and big arm. While he's very familiar to Sark and Milwee (from recruiting Simmons and Dakorien Moore), we already chose Lacey over Russell when the staff offered Lacey.
With that context, choosing to recruit Russell now shows they've watched his development and can more confidently project his growth into something they want to work with. He's not nearly as polished of a thrower, but Russell's ceiling is significantly higher than Lacey's, even in Sark's offense. Also, Dakorien Moore. 
Imo, we sign both. If anything, the portal gives more reason to join a 2 QB class, not less. Out of high school, you can choose where you think gives you the best opportunity to be developed. When you fail to win the starting job, you find an ideal offense with an opening at QB. Literally the best of both worlds. 
Even if we don't sign both, what do we lose if Lacey bounces? A generational prospect? No. The chance to land Ryan Williams? No. We lose a good QB prospect, but that's it. Choosing not to recruit Russell creates more downside risk than losing Lacey. Imagine impacting your relationships at Duncanville, Dakorien Moore, THSCA, etc over trying to keep KJ Lacey committed. Malpractice. 
 
 

I'm not plugged into the coaching staff or anything, but it seems to me pushing for Lacey was originally meant to be a two for one thing...get a pretty good QB along with one of the best WR prospects in the nation, and possibly start a little momentum in grabbing a few Alabama prospects in the future. As it is now, not sure getting Lacey by himself is enough..and certainly hasn't done us any favors with Ryan Williams.

[Hank_Hill 18,878]

It’s not that complicated, and here’s an essay explaining why

[Funk Doctor Spock 12,415]

3 minutes ago, Hank_Hill said:

It’s not that complicated, and here’s an essay explaining why

Would read again. 10/10

Needs more geography and car talk, though. 

[bejezuz 329]

17 hours ago, Ricky's one-hitter said:

Imo, we sign both. If anything, the portal gives more reason to join a 2 QB class, not less. Out of high school, you can choose where you think gives you the best opportunity to be developed. When you fail to win the starting job, you find an ideal offense with an opening at QB. Literally the best of both worlds. 

Even if we don't sign both, what do we lose if Lacey bounces? A generational prospect? No. The chance to land Ryan Williams? No. We lose a good QB prospect, but that's it. Choosing not to recruit Russell creates more downside risk than losing Lacey. Imagine impacting your relationships at Duncanville, Dakorien Moore, THSCA, etc over trying to keep KJ Lacey committed. Malpractice. 

There aren't many schools that create more buzz for backup and redshirt QBs than us with Sark.  Malik Murphy was still pretty raw when he transferred and he still had his pick of starting opportunities.  

[Bodacious Bevo 3,584]

26 minutes ago, bejezuz said:

There aren't many schools that create more buzz for backup and redshirt QBs than us with Sark.  Malik Murphy was still pretty raw when he transferred and he still had his pick of starting opportunities.  

The two guys we've sent off transferred to Purdue and Duke

[BurntOrange&White 39,934]

16 minutes ago, Bodacious Bevo said:

The two guys we've sent off transferred to Purdue and Duke

Well at least it wasn't Utah or SMU again

[LCHorn 2,620]

12 minutes ago, Bodacious Bevo said:

The two guys we've sent off transferred to Purdue and Duke

While I think you bring up a good point, getting Ewers high profile national awards, first round draft pick convo, etc., plus presumably the same with Manning is going to have overflow prestige on the rest of the QB room.  
 

If you need evidence of this just take a look at Alabama’s portal departures on defense the last few years.  
 

QB is a little different, too, in that you are looking more at depth chart and less at program status since only one can play.  

[closetojumping 62,746]

Are Purdue and Duke considered bad landing spots? They're P5 bowl teams. Who is losing a backup QB that lands at a blue blood in a starting role? Not many.

 

[Bodacious Bevo 3,584]

They're both fine landing spots. Let's just not get carried away with ideas about guys buying in to a 2 QB class because of an imaginary option to transfer to a spot of their choosing. As transfers, guys are more likely to start at a place like Duke then transfer up than they are to be backups at a place like Texas and transfer laterally. Case in point: Hudson Card almost went to Notre Dame but they ultimately went with Sam Hartman. 

[closetojumping 62,746]

Some things to think about for this cycle:

-The ranking of this class will only be limited by how many high school players Sarkisian wishes to take. If they take 27+, I think they'll be ranked in the top 3. Less than that, top 5.

-They're getting outreach from players and their camps at multiple positions. NIL rep helps, but so does putting guys into the league and running a style of play that guys find attractive. In a stacked in-state class at WR, they're getting national interest and could take basically whoever they want. OL looks similar.

-Notice how they're working OVs for more players than they have scholarships available at numerous positions. You're seeing it at OL, Edge, DT, TE and DB. I would not be surprised to see some more Nate Kibbling happening this cycle at some of these spots. You want in? We need your commitment now or we can't take it. We have a bunch of guys coming in next week for the same position if we don't have your commitment. Obviously that isn't going to happen to the truest 5 stars, but it could happen at a very, very high level of talent in various spots. 

-Notice how they're not working on back-ups at a few spots. That indicates, to me, that they know who they're getting and the NIL element is already sorted. There isn't a backup plan for RB1, MLB1, OLB1. 

-Some of what Texas does at the HS level is going to be informed by this next transfer cycle. They're expecting to lose some guys at the 3rd string level even they don't want to do so. They have to no matter what. If they lose 4 OL instead of 1-2, that means 5-6 OL instead of 4-5. Similarly at LB or DT. Positions that they'd generally do better developing than grabbing from the portal will play a bigger role in the class.

-The QB thing is kind of weird and might get weirder. 

-If there is more than another 1-2 commits ahead of June, I'd be kind of stunned. 

[Ricky's one-hitter 9,117]

11 minutes ago, Bodacious Bevo said:

They're both fine landing spots. Let's just not get carried away with ideas about guys buying in to a 2 QB class because of an imaginary option to transfer to a spot of their choosing. As transfers, guys are more likely to start at a place like Duke then transfer up than they are to be backups at a place like Texas and transfer laterally. Case in point: Hudson Card almost went to Notre Dame but they ultimately went with Sam Hartman. 

To clarify my opinion

Every 4* prospect thinks they're going to the NFL, so the football considerations when choosing a school will generally include how they'll be developed by their coaches and how the system showcases their ability. Conversely, they'll need to consider which schools would negatively impact development. 

Using that criteria, Texas is easily a top 3 destination for the development of pro style QBs. If I have the opportunity to be developed in a top 3 program for my skillset, why do I care how many other QBs are in my class? 

Where the loser of that battle lands in the portal is entirely a reflection of their ability to maximize while here. I didn't suggest everyone who portals out would have lateral opportunity. For the most part, they'll land somewhere that aligns with their known talent level - corn, Duke, and Purdue are pretty great options. It's only a step down based on high school offers that are all projection anyway. 

[Vertigo 20,290]

50 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

Some things to think about for this cycle:

-The ranking of this class will only be limited by how many high school players Sarkisian wishes to take. If they take 27+, I think they'll be ranked in the top 3. Less than that, top 5.

-They're getting outreach from players and their camps at multiple positions. NIL rep helps, but so does putting guys into the league and running a style of play that guys find attractive. In a stacked in-state class at WR, they're getting national interest and could take basically whoever they want. OL looks similar.

-Notice how they're working OVs for more players than they have scholarships available at numerous positions. You're seeing it at OL, Edge, DT, TE and DB. I would not be surprised to see some more Nate Kibbling happening this cycle at some of these spots. You want in? We need your commitment now or we can't take it. We have a bunch of guys coming in next week for the same position if we don't have your commitment. Obviously that isn't going to happen to the truest 5 stars, but it could happen at a very, very high level of talent in various spots. 

-Notice how they're not working on back-ups at a few spots. That indicates, to me, that they know who they're getting and the NIL element is already sorted. There isn't a backup plan for RB1, MLB1, OLB1. 

-Some of what Texas does at the HS level is going to be informed by this next transfer cycle. They're expecting to lose some guys at the 3rd string level even they don't want to do so. They have to no matter what. If they lose 4 OL instead of 1-2, that means 5-6 OL instead of 4-5. Similarly at LB or DT. Positions that they'd generally do better developing than grabbing from the portal will play a bigger role in the class.

-The QB thing is kind of weird and might get weirder. 

-If there is more than another 1-2 commits ahead of June, I'd be kind of stunned. 

I don't fully comprehend why the QB situation with Lacy is even a thing. Is it just a territory pissing match with Auburn and Bama as they muddy the waters with NIL? Is he not fully sold on *gasp* having to sit more than 1 season? Is he even fully convinced he wants to come here?

[closetojumping 62,746]

8 minutes ago, Vertigo said:

I don't fully comprehend why the QB situation with Lacy is even a thing. Is it just a territory pissing match with Auburn and Bama as they muddy the waters with NIL? Is he not fully sold on *gasp* having to sit more than 1 season? Is he even fully convinced he wants to come here?

How about the opposite of all of that? What if someone emerges that causes Texas to rethink it's options?

[Hookem2147 21,336]

Gerry has been banging the Keelon Russell drum for a while. I remember him saying last summer Russell would be the best QB prospect to ever come out of Duncanville. 

It definitely seems possible Texas has kept tabs on him and now is at the point where they think he is just as good or better than Lacy. I'm going to personally fade the chances of a two QB class with two guys of that caliber. Life is pretty good right now but no way it can be that good. 

[ClubWhatever 12,145]

Lacy knows he is going to sit the bench here for one and probably two years anyway.   Given the portal, I'm going to fade the chance he ever plays even if he signs here.   And despite his words I don't think he signs here regardless of Russell.   I'd offer Russell and let the chips fall.

[BachelorTrek 3,031]

18 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

How about the opposite of all of that? What if someone emerges that causes Texas to rethink it's options?

its options

Lulz.

[closetojumping 62,746]

7 minutes ago, BachelorTrek said:

its options

Lulz.

One autocorrected misspelling of such a thing in 25 years of posting and you felt the need. 

[bad_teammate 13,215]

10 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

One autocorrected misspelling of such a thing in 25 years of posting and you felt the need. 

Its terrible how these pedants ruin threads.

[Park Gothic 5,045]

55 minutes ago, Hookem2147 said:

Gerry has been banging the Keelon Russell drum for a while. I remember him saying last summer Russell would be the best QB prospect to ever come out of Duncanville. 

It definitely seems possible Texas has kept tabs on him and now is at the point where they think he is just as good or better than Lacy. I'm going to personally fade the chances of a two QB class with two guys of that caliber. Life is pretty good right now but no way it can be that good. 

50 minutes ago, ClubWhatever said:

Lacy knows he is going to sit the bench here for one and probably two years anyway.   Given the portal, I'm going to fade the chance he ever plays even if he signs here.   And despite his words I don't think he signs here regardless of Russell.   I'd offer Russell and let the chips fall.

Pigs get fat. Hogs get slaughtered. Seems like every time a team takes 2 big time QB recruits, it blows up in the staff's face. I don't know shit about fuck, but the whole thing makes me nervous. 

33 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

One autocorrected misspelling of such a thing in 25 years of posting and you felt the need. 

There's a joke here about @SydneyCarton and people spelling like petards, but I can't quite put my hands on it. Can one be hoisted by autocrrect?

[BurntOrange&White 39,934]

Spitballing but I think our staff assumes Lacey will flip last minute and wants Russell to help with Moore. 

[SydneyCarton 48,110]

12 minutes ago, Park Gothic said:

Pigs get fat. Hogs get slaughtered. Seems like every time a team takes 2 big time QB recruits, it blows up in the staff's face. I don't know shit about fuck, but the whole thing makes me nervous. 

There's a joke here about @SydneyCarton and people spelling like petards, but I can't quite put my hands on it. Can one be hoisted by autocrrect?

[tokamak 6,431]

The easy explanation is that we took Lacey because we liked him, he wanted to commit, and we had dreams of a Lacey/Ryan Williams combo. Russell wasn't really in the picture at that time. Now Russell has blown up, we decided we really like him, and the plan is to recruit both guys hard and let the chips fall where they may.

The puzzle piece that doesn't fit for me is that Lacey was kind of shaky for a while but lately appears to be getting firmer in his commitment, if anything. He canceled his other OVs. The trend is the opposite of what you'd expect given the situation.

[closetojumping 62,746]

The simple way to sort this, if they really like Russell (and there is growing evidence that they do), is to just tell Lacey next weekend or whenever he's in Austin next is that they're taking 2 QBs in this cycle. He goes back to Bama and decommits, then Texas takes Russell. Moore decommits this summer and commits to Texas shortly thereafter. Bing bang boom.

[Red Five 40,862]

7 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

The simple way to sort this, if they really like Russell (and there is growing evidence that they do), is to just tell Lacey next weekend or whenever he's in Austin next is that they're taking 2 QBs in this cycle. He goes back to Bama and decommits, then Texas takes Russell. Moore decommits this summer and commits to Texas shortly thereafter. Bing bang boom.

So simple. And yet so brilliant. 

[Thiefery 5,011]

2 hours ago, Red Five said:

So simple. And yet so brilliant. 

...like a threesome??

[Lou_Sassle 2,876]

7 minutes ago, Thiefery said:

...like a threesome??

 

[Funk Doctor Spock 12,415]

Gerry was saying the staff told Lacey who they want as their WR'S and other positions and have sent him to work on them. 

[Getafix 28,682]

- Jordan Scruggs put in a CB for Courtland Guillory (CB), to Texas.  

- Adrian Wilson (Pflugerville Weiss), top 200 WR, decommitted from Oregon.  Scruggs says he knows him very well, and that we would be in great position if we offered.  Chris Jackson spoke with him today. Scruggs really likes the kid.

 

 

[victory88 5,669]

A couple of things I’ve picked up and pieced together listening to Gerry and Bobby.  All of this is me speculating.  Looks like Sark has known about Lacy from his stint at Bama and I believe knows his QB trainer quite well out in Bamaland.  Lacy has previously mentioned that Sark started building that relationship with him early on while he was still in middle school.  It seems to me that Lacy took a step back when Quinn decided to come back as it delayed his path to the field by another year.  Coming off a playoff appearance and a who’s who list of recruits visiting, Sark probably didn’t like the idea that his QB commit was visiting other schools multiple times.  Lacy is good but he’s not Arch or Quinn so that shit probably won’t fly too long.  Couple of things Gerry hinted were that Saban is gone and DeBoer is bringing his own frosh QB from Washington so Lacy would need to sit at Bama just as long.  What’s stopping Auburn or Kiffin from taking a transfer after he commits, he’s not guaranteed playing time there either and both coaches would take an experienced transfer QB in a second.  I imagine he’s realizing the sales pitch from the other coaches doesn’t exactly clear his path any better with regards to playing time.  I imagine Sark recruiting the Duncanville kid is probably a combination of putting pressure on Lacy to shut this shit down before summer visits or we’ll pass, to maintain a plan B, and/or perhaps a kid they think may be better in Russell.  Regardless, Texas is in a position to cherry pick prospects right now.  

[NorLa Horns 1,458]

Ah remember not too long ago, we were juggling Milroe and Ewers?  And ended up with....Charles Wright?  

Those were the days, huh?  

Sark has us in a much better spot now. But these are kids. And kids do crazy shit. 

[Beer Drinker 618]

39 minutes ago, NorLa Horns said:

Ah remember not too long ago, we were juggling Milroe and Ewers?  And ended up with....Charles Wright?  

Those were the days, huh?  

Sark has us in a much better spot now. But these are kids. And kids do crazy shit. 

I liked the year we flirted with Kyler Murray just to lose a Michigan tight end (our QB take) and ended up with Kai Locksley.

[Teamdirtyleg 1,060]

40 minutes ago, Beer Drinker said:

I liked the year we flirted with Kyler Murray just to lose a Michigan tight end (our QB take) and ended up with Kai Locksley.

[Tex Pete 20,399]

1 hour ago, Beer Drinker said:

I liked the year we flirted with Kyler Murray just to lose a Michigan tight end (our QB take) and ended up with Kai Locksley.

Was that worse than ending up with Casey Thompson?

[campcrunk 2,503]

11 hours ago, closetojumping said:

The simple way to sort this, if they really like Russell (and there is growing evidence that they do), is to just tell Lacey next weekend or whenever he's in Austin next is that they're taking 2 QBs in this cycle. He goes back to Bama and decommits, then Texas takes Russell. Moore decommits this summer and commits to Texas shortly thereafter. Bing bang boom.

I really like KJ Lacey. I think the upper middle class man's Bryce Young comparison's are dead on. He's going to be a stud.

 

That said, give me Keelon Russell all day, every day. Frankly, at the rate that Russell seems improving developing, it's not that close. He's a must get whether we take 1 or 2 QBs. I certainly woudln't complain about getting Lacey - not one bit, even if he's the only QB in the class - but if we have the option and only wind up with one QB, it should be Russell. 

 

Then again, I remember another QB named "Russell" (first name, this time) who just seemed to get better and better and we wound up not getting him. That turned out GREAT because we still wound up with a top 20 prospect and the top pocket passer in the country who wound up winning a Super Bowl ring. I'll always look back fondly on the name "Garrett Gilbert."

 

No, wait.  Sorry. What's the polar opposite of "fondly?" Ah well. At least Shepard (and that other state traitor Craig Loston, for that matter) never wound up doing shit either. Speaking of "state traitors," fuck Jamarkus McFarland's do-nothing, never-was ass too. 

Edited March 27 by campcrunk

[Rimbo 25,975]

14 hours ago, closetojumping said:

Less than that, top 5.

[campcrunk 2,503]

5 hours ago, Beer Drinker said:

I liked the year we flirted with Kyler Murray just to lose a Michigan tight end (our QB take) and ended up with Kai Locksley.

We just have SO MANY "fun," "little" recruiting hiccups to look back on "fondly" from the Charlie/Herman years. 

Terrell Cuney, Cameron Hampton (WHO?), Lorenzo Joe, Chris Warren, Kai Locksley, Cameron Townsend (what's with all the LBs named "Cameron" that I do not remember at all?), Buck Major, Garrett Thomas, Patrick Hudson (alas, what could have been - under the pretty significant assumption that we didn't fuck up his development ALL the way up. Which is a MASSIVE gamble and probably not at all realistic given our staff at the time. Sigh...), Jeff McCulloch, Kyle Porter (saw him play in HS. I could've sworn he was even better than Rodney Anderson, though it's hard to tell behind the grown ass men Katy rolls out on OL. Turns out that they both just kind of sucked), Jean DeLance (see what proper development can do for you??? I don't give a shit that he didn't do anything in the NFL. He was damn solid in college. For Florida😠).

And who could possibly forget JP Urquidez? Certainly not @Tex Pete. Then, OF COURSE, we have the amazing, astonishing, astounding, absolutely unparalled Florida Five. Thanks to Davante Davis for being the only one was worth a shit, managing to last through one, single, solitary motherfucking practice without quitting, AND having the grades to make it onto campus in the first place. Also, does the name "Shiro Davis" ring a bell for anyone? Me neither. 

Oh, and hey! Who wants to see Tom Herman call a pitch to Danny Young on 4th and 0.5 so we can watch him promptly lose 3 yards and turn the ball over at our own 40 while looking like he's running through quicksand? Good times, good times. Herman EASILY had some of the most baffling turnovers on downs I've ever seen. And I LOVE it when coaches are aggressive and do that. Herman was just godawful at it. Then, of course, we had the other "magnificant" offensive "weapons" Herman and his cadre of imbicile assistants and yes men brought in.

Montrell Estell (when he wasn't switching back and forth to DB), Reese Moore, Reese Leitao, doctor and amateur pharmacist (and as an part time amateur pharmicist myself, I don't even respect his work in that field. Xanax? How generic and uncreative can you get? Go get you some 4-HO-MiPT, DPT, or DiPT. Or, if you absolutely have to sell benzos instead of something cool, try Pyrazolam, Bromazolam, Flubrotizolam, or Flubromazolam. They're not even technically illegal as long as marked "not for human consumption" and/or you put the little skull and crossbones on the container thanks a loophole in the Federal Analogue Act you could pilot an aircraft carrier through), Toneil (excuse me: Toenail) Carter, Jordan Pouncey, Brennan "Alligator Arms" Eagles, Josh Moore's unregistered gat, Malcom Epps (probably my personal favorite. "Bama wanted him so he MUST be good!!1" Saban would have trapdoored his ass 15 seconds after he set foot in Tuscaloosa. Assuming, of course, that the only reason we got him at all isn't because Saban had already trapdoored his ass. And then, "offensive wunderkind genius" Lincoln Riley takes him? That alone should disprove every "Riley is an incredible coach" argument we've ever had on this board), and Casey Thompson, annihilator of locker rooms. Who could forget good old Casey Thomson, his proud papa, and their insistence that Casey was worlds better than Ehlinger. 

We should also note that Thompson (and dear old dad, of course. I wonder if he got to keep the orange jumpsuit from that SI cover?) played at least some small part in Cam Rising bolting for Utah - though I concede most of it had to do with Rising's idiotic assumption that he'd come take Sam's job from day 1), Tyler Johnson, Javonne Shephard (lol), Ja'Quinden Jackson (GOD FUCKING DAMMIT, HERMAN AND YURCICH. We had this guy as a potential wildcat QB or powerback and we were running pitches to DANNY FUCKING YOUNG on 4th and inches???!!) and, of course, Keaontay Ingram (here come the intrusive thoughts and involuntary flashbacks of the LSU game which will probably be followed by seizures and months long severe depression...). 

And, of course, Herman's defensive recruiting. Just... MWAH! *Chef's kiss.* Jalen Green, Tyler Owens, Juwan "I'm collecting AARP checks dven though I'm still transferring between schools" Mitchell, Prince Dorbah ("just look at that first step! He's like our very own Von Miller!"), Xavion Aford, Sawyer Goram-Welch (counting him as a DT since that's what he was recruited as - even though he's found a way to be a complete non-factor (or worse) on BOTH sides of the ball now), and Caleb Johnson ("if he ever gets on the field, he's like Gary Johnson but bigger and faster! Really! I swear! Guys? Guys? Where are you going?").

And, to save the absolute best for last, the tin man himself, BJ Foster. Maybe the single most frustrating Texas defensive back I've ever had the misfortune to watch. Say what you want about Taafe, Schooler, and Haines. At least they left everything on the field when they played. Foster, on the other hand, couldn't even be bothered to run down multiple very stoppable touchdown plays and plenty of other long gains when he didn't feel like it.

Meanwhile, Breckyn Hager is still MASSIVELY overrunning the backfield somewhere. He's probably several hundred miles behind the play by now and still going, determined to get to that QB. Don't ever give up, little buddy. You'll get to freshman Brock Purdy someday, even if you have to sprint all the way to San Francisco to do it. 

Well. What a "fun" little walk down memory lane. I think almost everyone here knows I could keep going on this. For a long, LONG time. But I think this post is already too long (and disheartening, enraging, and just plain miserable enough). Also, I prefer not to disparage MOST kids who decide to be Longhorns as long as they try, aren't complete fuckups, or aren't just bad guys. Anyway, now that I've remembered all of that and even done some research on it, I'm gonna go drink a whole container of bleach, swallow 3 bottles of Oxy, and stick my head in the oven just to make sure I get the "job" done.

Sincere thanks to Bijan, Sam, Roschon, Lil'Jordan, Collin Johnson, Sweat, Ford, Cosmi, Poona, and some other guys for making our games under Herman and Strong (usually) bearable to watch. Especially when Herman actually bothered to play Bijan.

Edited March 27 by campcrunk

[campcrunk 2,503]

DP. Disregard. Sorry

Edited March 27 by campcrunk

[Mother mopar 3,319]

We just have SO MANY "fun," "little" recruiting hiccups to look back on "fondly" from the Charlie/Herman years. 
Terrell Cuney, Cameron Hampton (WHO?), Lorenzo Joe, Chris Warren, Kai Locksley, Cameron Townsend (what's with all the LBs named "Cameron" that I do not remember at all?), Buck Major, Garrett Thomas, Patrick Hudson (alas, what could have been - under the pretty significant assumption that we didn't fuck up his development ALL the way up. Which is a MASSIVE gamble and probably not at all realistic given our staff at the time. Sigh...), Jeff McCulloch, Kyle Porter (saw him play in HS. I could've sworn he was even better than Rodney Anderson, though it's hard to tell behind the grown ass men Katy rolls out on OL. Turns out that they both just kind of sucked), Jean DeLance (see what proper development can do for you??? I don't give a shit that he didn't do anything in the NFL. He was damn solid in college. For Florida).
And who could possibly forget JP Urquidez? Certainly not [mention=1076]Tex Pete[/mention]. Then, OF COURSE, we have the amazing, astonishing, astounding, absolutely unparalled Florida Five. Thanks to Davante Davis for being the only one was worth a shit, managing to last through one, single, solitary motherfucking practice without quitting, AND having the grades to make it onto campus in the first place. Also, does the name "Shiro Davis" ring a bell for anyone? Me neither. 
Oh, and hey! Who wants to see Tom Herman call a pitch to Danny Young on 4th and 0.5 so we can watch him promptly lose 3 yards and turn the ball over at our own 40 while looking like he's running through quicksand? Good times, good times. Herman EASILY had some of the most baffling turnovers on downs I've ever seen. And I LOVE it when coaches are aggressive and do that. Herman was just godawful at it. Then, of course, we had the other "magnificant" offensive "weapons" Herman and his cadre of imbicile assistants and yes men brought in.
Montrell Estell (when he wasn't switching back and forth to DB), Reese Moore, Reese Leitao, doctor and amateur pharmacist (and as an part time amateur pharmicist myself, I don't even respect his work in that field. Xanax? How generic and uncreative can you get? Go get you some 4-HO-MiPT, DPT, or DiPT. Or, if you absolutely have to sell benzos instead of something cool, try Pyrazolam, Bromazolam, Flubrotizolam, or Flubromazolam. They're not even technically illegal as long as marked "not for human consumption" and/or you put the little skull and crossbones on the container thanks a loophole in the Federal Analogue Act you could pilot an aircraft carrier through), Toneil (excuse me: Toenail) Carter, Jordan Pouncey, Brennan "Alligator Arms" Eagles, Josh Moore's unregistered gat, Malcom Epps (probably my personal favorite. "Bama wanted him so he MUST be good!!1" Saban would have trapdoored his ass 15 seconds after he set foot in Tuscaloosa. Assuming, of course, that the only reason we got him at all isn't because Saban had already trapdoored his ass. And then, "offensive wunderkind genius" Lincoln Riley takes him? That alone should disprove every "Riley is an incredible coach" argument we've ever had on this board), and Casey Thompson, annihilator of locker rooms. Who could forget good old Casey Thomson, his proud papa, and their insistence that Casey was worlds better than Ehlinger. 
We should also note that Thompson (and dear old dad, of course. I wonder if he got to keep the orange jumpsuit from that SI cover?) played at least some small part in Cam Rising bolting for Utah - though I concede most of it had to do with Rising's idiotic assumption that he'd come take Sam's job from day 1), Tyler Johnson, Javonne Shephard (lol), Ja'Quinden Jackson (GOD FUCKING DAMMIT, HERMAN AND YURCICH. We had this guy as a potential wildcat QB or powerback and we were running pitches to DANNY FUCKING YOUNG on 4th and inches???!!) and, of course, Keaontay Ingram (here come the intrusive thoughts and involuntary flashbacks of the LSU game which will probably be followed by seizures and months long severe depression...). 
And, of course, Herman's defensive recruiting. Just... MWAH! *Chef's kiss.* Jalen Green, Tyler Owens, Juwan "I'm collecting AARP checks dven though I'm still transferring between schools" Mitchell, Prince Dorbah ("just look at that first step! He's like our very own Von Miller!"), Xavion Aford, Sawyer Goram-Welch (counting him as a DT since that's what he was recruited as - even though he's found a way to be a complete non-factor (or worse) on BOTH sides of the ball now), and Caleb Johnson ("if he ever gets on the field, he's like Gary Johnson but bigger and faster! Really! I swear! Guys? Guys? Where are you going?").
And, to save the absolute best for last, the tin man himself, BJ Foster. Maybe the single most frustrating Texas defensive back I've ever had the misfortune to watch. Say what you want about Taafe, Schooler, and Haines. At least they left everything on the field when they played. Foster, on the other hand, couldn't even be bothered to run down multiple very stoppable touchdown plays and plenty of other long gains when he didn't feel like it.
Meanwhile, Breckyn Hager is still MASSIVELY overrunning the backfield somewhere. He's probably several hundred miles behind the play by now and still going, determined to get to that QB. Don't ever give up, little buddy. You'll get to freshman Brock Purdy someday, even if you have to sprint all the way to San Francisco to do it. 

Well. What a "fun" little walk down memory lane. I think almost everyone here knows I could keep going on this. For a long, LONG time. But I think this post is already too long (and disheartening, enraging, and just plain miserable enough). Also, I prefer not to disparage MOST kids who decide to be Longhorns as long as they try, aren't complete fuckups, or aren't just bad guys. Anyway, now that I've remembered all of that and even done some research on it, I'm gonna go drink a whole container of bleach, swallow 3 bottles of Oxy, and stick my head in the oven just to make sure I get the "job" done.
Sincere thanks to Bijan, Sam, Roschon, Lil'Jordan, Collin Johnson, Sweat, Ford, Cosmi, Poona, and some other guys for making our games under Herman and Strong (usually) bearable to watch. Especially when Herman actually bothered to play Bijan.

There's a thread for this BS and your dissertation. No one gives a fuck about chuckles or TH. Let it go.

[Vito Andolini 9,126]

Good god, man, you really are broken to have dredged that sojourn down agony lane from your active/subconscious at 4 in the morning. I hope healing is on the way. 

[Post Oak 20,244]

1 hour ago, campcrunk said:

We just have SO MANY "fun," "little" recruiting hiccups to look back on "fondly" from the Charlie/Herman years. 

Terrell Cuney, Cameron Hampton (WHO?), Lorenzo Joe, Chris Warren, Kai Locksley, Cameron Townsend (what's with all the LBs named "Cameron" that I do not remember at all?), Buck Major, Garrett Thomas, Patrick Hudson (alas, what could have been - under the pretty significant assumption that we didn't fuck up his development ALL the way up. Which is a MASSIVE gamble and probably not at all realistic given our staff at the time. Sigh...), Jeff McCulloch, Kyle Porter (saw him play in HS. I could've sworn he was even better than Rodney Anderson, though it's hard to tell behind the grown ass men Katy rolls out on OL. Turns out that they both just kind of sucked), Jean DeLance (see what proper development can do for you??? I don't give a shit that he didn't do anything in the NFL. He was damn solid in college. For Florida😠).

And who could possibly forget JP Urquidez? Certainly not @Tex Pete. Then, OF COURSE, we have the amazing, astonishing, astounding, absolutely unparalled Florida Five. Thanks to Davante Davis for being the only one was worth a shit, managing to last through one, single, solitary motherfucking practice without quitting, AND having the grades to make it onto campus in the first place. Also, does the name "Shiro Davis" ring a bell for anyone? Me neither. 

Oh, and hey! Who wants to see Tom Herman call a pitch to Danny Young on 4th and 0.5 so we can watch him promptly lose 3 yards and turn the ball over at our own 40 while looking like he's running through quicksand? Good times, good times. Herman EASILY had some of the most baffling turnovers on downs I've ever seen. And I LOVE it when coaches are aggressive and do that. Herman was just godawful at it. Then, of course, we had the other "magnificant" offensive "weapons" Herman and his cadre of imbicile assistants and yes men brought in.

Montrell Estell (when he wasn't switching back and forth to DB), Reese Moore, Reese Leitao, doctor and amateur pharmacist (and as an part time amateur pharmicist myself, I don't even respect his work in that field. Xanax? How generic and uncreative can you get? Go get you some 4-HO-MiPT, DPT, or DiPT. Or, if you absolutely have to sell benzos instead of something cool, try Pyrazolam, Bromazolam, Flubrotizolam, or Flubromazolam. They're not even technically illegal as long as marked "not for human consumption" and/or you put the little skull and crossbones on the container thanks a loophole in the Federal Analogue Act you could pilot an aircraft carrier through), Toneil (excuse me: Toenail) Carter, Jordan Pouncey, Brennan "Alligator Arms" Eagles, Josh Moore's unregistered gat, Malcom Epps (probably my personal favorite. "Bama wanted him so he MUST be good!!1" Saban would have trapdoored his ass 15 seconds after he set foot in Tuscaloosa. Assuming, of course, that the only reason we got him at all isn't because Saban had already trapdoored his ass. And then, "offensive wunderkind genius" Lincoln Riley takes him? That alone should disprove every "Riley is an incredible coach" argument we've ever had on this board), and Casey Thompson, annihilator of locker rooms. Who could forget good old Casey Thomson, his proud papa, and their insistence that Casey was worlds better than Ehlinger. 

We should also note that Thompson (and dear old dad, of course. I wonder if he got to keep the orange jumpsuit from that SI cover?) played at least some small part in Cam Rising bolting for Utah - though I concede most of it had to do with Rising's idiotic assumption that he'd come take Sam's job from day 1), Tyler Johnson, Javonne Shephard (lol), Ja'Quinden Jackson (GOD FUCKING DAMMIT, HERMAN AND YURCICH. We had this guy as a potential wildcat QB or powerback and we were running pitches to DANNY FUCKING YOUNG on 4th and inches???!!) and, of course, Keaontay Ingram (here come the intrusive thoughts and involuntary flashbacks of the LSU game which will probably be followed by seizures and months long severe depression...). 

And, of course, Herman's defensive recruiting. Just... MWAH! *Chef's kiss.* Jalen Green, Tyler Owens, Juwan "I'm collecting AARP checks dven though I'm still transferring between schools" Mitchell, Prince Dorbah ("just look at that first step! He's like our very own Von Miller!"), Xavion Aford, Sawyer Goram-Welch (counting him as a DT since that's what he was recruited as - even though he's found a way to be a complete non-factor (or worse) on BOTH sides of the ball now), and Caleb Johnson ("if he ever gets on the field, he's like Gary Johnson but bigger and faster! Really! I swear! Guys? Guys? Where are you going?").

And, to save the absolute best for last, the tin man himself, BJ Foster. Maybe the single most frustrating Texas defensive back I've ever had the misfortune to watch. Say what you want about Taafe, Schooler, and Haines. At least they left everything on the field when they played. Foster, on the other hand, couldn't even be bothered to run down multiple very stoppable touchdown plays and plenty of other long gains when he didn't feel like it.

Meanwhile, Breckyn Hager is still MASSIVELY overrunning the backfield somewhere. He's probably several hundred miles behind the play by now and still going, determined to get to that QB. Don't ever give up, little buddy. You'll get to freshman Brock Purdy someday, even if you have to sprint all the way to San Francisco to do it. 

Well. What a "fun" little walk down memory lane. I think almost everyone here knows I could keep going on this. For a long, LONG time. But I think this post is already too long (and disheartening, enraging, and just plain miserable enough). Also, I prefer not to disparage MOST kids who decide to be Longhorns as long as they try, aren't complete fuckups, or aren't just bad guys. Anyway, now that I've remembered all of that and even done some research on it, I'm gonna go drink a whole container of bleach, swallow 3 bottles of Oxy, and stick my head in the oven just to make sure I get the "job" done.

Sincere thanks to Bijan, Sam, Roschon, Lil'Jordan, Collin Johnson, Sweat, Ford, Cosmi, Poona, and some other guys for making our games under Herman and Strong (usually) bearable to watch. Especially when Herman actually bothered to play Bijan.

 

[UDontKnow 10,447]

1 hour ago, campcrunk said:

All the bullshit you typed up.

Cameron Hampton was actually a Mack Brown special who ultimately ended up at Lamar University.

[IDIOTsavant 8,496]

Spoiler

3 hours ago, campcrunk said:

We just have SO MANY "fun," "little" recruiting hiccups to look back on "fondly" from the Charlie/Herman years. 

Terrell Cuney, Cameron Hampton (WHO?), Lorenzo Joe, Chris Warren, Kai Locksley, Cameron Townsend (what's with all the LBs named "Cameron" that I do not remember at all?), Buck Major, Garrett Thomas, Patrick Hudson (alas, what could have been - under the pretty significant assumption that we didn't fuck up his development ALL the way up. Which is a MASSIVE gamble and probably not at all realistic given our staff at the time. Sigh...), Jeff McCulloch, Kyle Porter (saw him play in HS. I could've sworn he was even better than Rodney Anderson, though it's hard to tell behind the grown ass men Katy rolls out on OL. Turns out that they both just kind of sucked), Jean DeLance (see what proper development can do for you??? I don't give a shit that he didn't do anything in the NFL. He was damn solid in college. For Florida😠).

And who could possibly forget JP Urquidez? Certainly not @Tex Pete. Then, OF COURSE, we have the amazing, astonishing, astounding, absolutely unparalled Florida Five. Thanks to Davante Davis for being the only one was worth a shit, managing to last through one, single, solitary motherfucking practice without quitting, AND having the grades to make it onto campus in the first place. Also, does the name "Shiro Davis" ring a bell for anyone? Me neither. 

Oh, and hey! Who wants to see Tom Herman call a pitch to Danny Young on 4th and 0.5 so we can watch him promptly lose 3 yards and turn the ball over at our own 40 while looking like he's running through quicksand? Good times, good times. Herman EASILY had some of the most baffling turnovers on downs I've ever seen. And I LOVE it when coaches are aggressive and do that. Herman was just godawful at it. Then, of course, we had the other "magnificant" offensive "weapons" Herman and his cadre of imbicile assistants and yes men brought in.

Montrell Estell (when he wasn't switching back and forth to DB), Reese Moore, Reese Leitao, doctor and amateur pharmacist (and as an part time amateur pharmicist myself, I don't even respect his work in that field. Xanax? How generic and uncreative can you get? Go get you some 4-HO-MiPT, DPT, or DiPT. Or, if you absolutely have to sell benzos instead of something cool, try Pyrazolam, Bromazolam, Flubrotizolam, or Flubromazolam. They're not even technically illegal as long as marked "not for human consumption" and/or you put the little skull and crossbones on the container thanks a loophole in the Federal Analogue Act you could pilot an aircraft carrier through), Toneil (excuse me: Toenail) Carter, Jordan Pouncey, Brennan "Alligator Arms" Eagles, Josh Moore's unregistered gat, Malcom Epps (probably my personal favorite. "Bama wanted him so he MUST be good!!1" Saban would have trapdoored his ass 15 seconds after he set foot in Tuscaloosa. Assuming, of course, that the only reason we got him at all isn't because Saban had already trapdoored his ass. And then, "offensive wunderkind genius" Lincoln Riley takes him? That alone should disprove every "Riley is an incredible coach" argument we've ever had on this board), and Casey Thompson, annihilator of locker rooms. Who could forget good old Casey Thomson, his proud papa, and their insistence that Casey was worlds better than Ehlinger. 

We should also note that Thompson (and dear old dad, of course. I wonder if he got to keep the orange jumpsuit from that SI cover?) played at least some small part in Cam Rising bolting for Utah - though I concede most of it had to do with Rising's idiotic assumption that he'd come take Sam's job from day 1), Tyler Johnson, Javonne Shephard (lol), Ja'Quinden Jackson (GOD FUCKING DAMMIT, HERMAN AND YURCICH. We had this guy as a potential wildcat QB or powerback and we were running pitches to DANNY FUCKING YOUNG on 4th and inches???!!) and, of course, Keaontay Ingram (here come the intrusive thoughts and involuntary flashbacks of the LSU game which will probably be followed by seizures and months long severe depression...). 

And, of course, Herman's defensive recruiting. Just... MWAH! *Chef's kiss.* Jalen Green, Tyler Owens, Juwan "I'm collecting AARP checks dven though I'm still transferring between schools" Mitchell, Prince Dorbah ("just look at that first step! He's like our very own Von Miller!"), Xavion Aford, Sawyer Goram-Welch (counting him as a DT since that's what he was recruited as - even though he's found a way to be a complete non-factor (or worse) on BOTH sides of the ball now), and Caleb Johnson ("if he ever gets on the field, he's like Gary Johnson but bigger and faster! Really! I swear! Guys? Guys? Where are you going?").

And, to save the absolute best for last, the tin man himself, BJ Foster. Maybe the single most frustrating Texas defensive back I've ever had the misfortune to watch. Say what you want about Taafe, Schooler, and Haines. At least they left everything on the field when they played. Foster, on the other hand, couldn't even be bothered to run down multiple very stoppable touchdown plays and plenty of other long gains when he didn't feel like it.

Meanwhile, Breckyn Hager is still MASSIVELY overrunning the backfield somewhere. He's probably several hundred miles behind the play by now and still going, determined to get to that QB. Don't ever give up, little buddy. You'll get to freshman Brock Purdy someday, even if you have to sprint all the way to San Francisco to do it. 

Well. What a "fun" little walk down memory lane. I think almost everyone here knows I could keep going on this. For a long, LONG time. But I think this post is already too long (and disheartening, enraging, and just plain miserable enough). Also, I prefer not to disparage MOST kids who decide to be Longhorns as long as they try, aren't complete fuckups, or aren't just bad guys. Anyway, now that I've remembered all of that and even done some research on it, I'm gonna go drink a whole container of bleach, swallow 3 bottles of Oxy, and stick my head in the oven just to make sure I get the "job" done.

Sincere thanks to Bijan, Sam, Roschon, Lil'Jordan, Collin Johnson, Sweat, Ford, Cosmi, Poona, and some other guys for making our games under Herman and Strong (usually) bearable to watch. Especially when Herman actually bothered to play Bijan.

 

 

[Bevo14 8,332]

4 hours ago, campcrunk said:

We just have SO MANY "fun," "little" recruiting hiccups to look back on "fondly" from the Charlie/Herman years. 

Terrell Cuney, Cameron Hampton (WHO?), Lorenzo Joe, Chris Warren, Kai Locksley, Cameron Townsend (what's with all the LBs named "Cameron" that I do not remember at all?), Buck Major, Garrett Thomas, Patrick Hudson (alas, what could have been - under the pretty significant assumption that we didn't fuck up his development ALL the way up. Which is a MASSIVE gamble and probably not at all realistic given our staff at the time. Sigh...), Jeff McCulloch, Kyle Porter (saw him play in HS. I could've sworn he was even better than Rodney Anderson, though it's hard to tell behind the grown ass men Katy rolls out on OL. Turns out that they both just kind of sucked), Jean DeLance (see what proper development can do for you??? I don't give a shit that he didn't do anything in the NFL. He was damn solid in college. For Florida😠).

And who could possibly forget JP Urquidez? Certainly not @Tex Pete. Then, OF COURSE, we have the amazing, astonishing, astounding, absolutely unparalled Florida Five. Thanks to Davante Davis for being the only one was worth a shit, managing to last through one, single, solitary motherfucking practice without quitting, AND having the grades to make it onto campus in the first place. Also, does the name "Shiro Davis" ring a bell for anyone? Me neither. 

Oh, and hey! Who wants to see Tom Herman call a pitch to Danny Young on 4th and 0.5 so we can watch him promptly lose 3 yards and turn the ball over at our own 40 while looking like he's running through quicksand? Good times, good times. Herman EASILY had some of the most baffling turnovers on downs I've ever seen. And I LOVE it when coaches are aggressive and do that. Herman was just godawful at it. Then, of course, we had the other "magnificant" offensive "weapons" Herman and his cadre of imbicile assistants and yes men brought in.

Montrell Estell (when he wasn't switching back and forth to DB), Reese Moore, Reese Leitao, doctor and amateur pharmacist (and as an part time amateur pharmicist myself, I don't even respect his work in that field. Xanax? How generic and uncreative can you get? Go get you some 4-HO-MiPT, DPT, or DiPT. Or, if you absolutely have to sell benzos instead of something cool, try Pyrazolam, Bromazolam, Flubrotizolam, or Flubromazolam. They're not even technically illegal as long as marked "not for human consumption" and/or you put the little skull and crossbones on the container thanks a loophole in the Federal Analogue Act you could pilot an aircraft carrier through), Toneil (excuse me: Toenail) Carter, Jordan Pouncey, Brennan "Alligator Arms" Eagles, Josh Moore's unregistered gat, Malcom Epps (probably my personal favorite. "Bama wanted him so he MUST be good!!1" Saban would have trapdoored his ass 15 seconds after he set foot in Tuscaloosa. Assuming, of course, that the only reason we got him at all isn't because Saban had already trapdoored his ass. And then, "offensive wunderkind genius" Lincoln Riley takes him? That alone should disprove every "Riley is an incredible coach" argument we've ever had on this board), and Casey Thompson, annihilator of locker rooms. Who could forget good old Casey Thomson, his proud papa, and their insistence that Casey was worlds better than Ehlinger. 

We should also note that Thompson (and dear old dad, of course. I wonder if he got to keep the orange jumpsuit from that SI cover?) played at least some small part in Cam Rising bolting for Utah - though I concede most of it had to do with Rising's idiotic assumption that he'd come take Sam's job from day 1), Tyler Johnson, Javonne Shephard (lol), Ja'Quinden Jackson (GOD FUCKING DAMMIT, HERMAN AND YURCICH. We had this guy as a potential wildcat QB or powerback and we were running pitches to DANNY FUCKING YOUNG on 4th and inches???!!) and, of course, Keaontay Ingram (here come the intrusive thoughts and involuntary flashbacks of the LSU game which will probably be followed by seizures and months long severe depression...). 

And, of course, Herman's defensive recruiting. Just... MWAH! *Chef's kiss.* Jalen Green, Tyler Owens, Juwan "I'm collecting AARP checks dven though I'm still transferring between schools" Mitchell, Prince Dorbah ("just look at that first step! He's like our very own Von Miller!"), Xavion Aford, Sawyer Goram-Welch (counting him as a DT since that's what he was recruited as - even though he's found a way to be a complete non-factor (or worse) on BOTH sides of the ball now), and Caleb Johnson ("if he ever gets on the field, he's like Gary Johnson but bigger and faster! Really! I swear! Guys? Guys? Where are you going?").

And, to save the absolute best for last, the tin man himself, BJ Foster. Maybe the single most frustrating Texas defensive back I've ever had the misfortune to watch. Say what you want about Taafe, Schooler, and Haines. At least they left everything on the field when they played. Foster, on the other hand, couldn't even be bothered to run down multiple very stoppable touchdown plays and plenty of other long gains when he didn't feel like it.

Meanwhile, Breckyn Hager is still MASSIVELY overrunning the backfield somewhere. He's probably several hundred miles behind the play by now and still going, determined to get to that QB. Don't ever give up, little buddy. You'll get to freshman Brock Purdy someday, even if you have to sprint all the way to San Francisco to do it. 

Well. What a "fun" little walk down memory lane. I think almost everyone here knows I could keep going on this. For a long, LONG time. But I think this post is already too long (and disheartening, enraging, and just plain miserable enough). Also, I prefer not to disparage MOST kids who decide to be Longhorns as long as they try, aren't complete fuckups, or aren't just bad guys. Anyway, now that I've remembered all of that and even done some research on it, I'm gonna go drink a whole container of bleach, swallow 3 bottles of Oxy, and stick my head in the oven just to make sure I get the "job" done.

Sincere thanks to Bijan, Sam, Roschon, Lil'Jordan, Collin Johnson, Sweat, Ford, Cosmi, Poona, and some other guys for making our games under Herman and Strong (usually) bearable to watch. Especially when Herman actually bothered to play Bijan.

[irishtexan 11,521]

Reading all that would be tantamount to kicking myself in the dick. No thanks.

 

[HenryJames 66,120]

13 hours ago, Getafix said:

Scruggs really likes the kid.

[Bevo 13,579]

I'm amazed that he remembers that many names of washouts. It's like he prepared a dissertation on the subject and needed a full set of references.

 

 

[Elmer_Fudd 22,280]

Rink committing next weekend.  Aggy bound.