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Posted (edited)
1 hour ago, Scopro said:

The first year we were married (1968) I gave my wife a steam iron for her birthday.

Wait, you were fucking my wife? Negged, motherfucker.

That asshole should be crowdsourced.

Edited by Armybrat
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Posted
9 hours ago, Baboontyme said:

I tried to use targeted advertising/eye in the sky technology to get a solo stove or an ooni to show up on my wife's FB feed but it did not work. I got a mug and a Ted Lasso novelty t-shirt even though I told her no more novelty t shirts. 

Sounds like you should have told her "no more Oonis"

Posted
10 minutes ago, LebongJames said:

Nice stove but it reminds me of the time my dad bought my mom a microwave for Christmas.

How did that turn out? 
Did your dad recover eventually?

Posted
14 hours ago, PenelopeWitherspoon said:

Thanks.  My SA saw it and knew I would like it.  I love the military style.

What does SA stand for?

Posted
13 hours ago, Armybrat said:

How did that turn out? 
Did your dad recover eventually?

It was a rough couple of weeks. He was very happy when the Spring semester started so that she had to go back to work.

Posted
On 12/25/2021 at 3:22 AM, Superhero said:

Gift to myself. Les Paul Classic plain top in honeyburst finish. Bought it off of Reverb and expecting it by the end of the month.

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I'm buying myself this. 

pipes.jpg

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Posted
On 12/27/2021 at 11:05 AM, InkaUtexas said:

Dad and Son hooked me up with a new interior for the old jeep I am rebuilding. 

Dad coming to visit after losing mom was awesome. We got shitfaced and told stories until the wee hours of the morning. Goal was ambush Santa. 

When leaving Dad told me to go look at my night stand. His H&K P7 Mark 13 was sitting there. I have wanted that pistol since he got it in 1987. Damn sweet gift. 

Just had a late gift delivered. Again, for the jeep. A bad ass heavy duty jack. Damn my family knows me. Jeep and Guns. 

Happy New Year to all! 

 

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Posted
29 minutes ago, ABSR said:

Because you hate everyone, or you want everyone to hate you?

LOL. A little of both. My neighbors don't care, I asked them before I started. And actually its not a bad hobby. I make $200-300 cash per funeral for playing 2 songs.

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Posted
1 hour ago, Crapinon said:

LOL. A little of both. My neighbors don't care, I asked them before I started. And actually its not a bad hobby. I make $200-300 cash per funeral for playing 2 songs.

I’m guessing Amazing Grace is one of the songs. What’s the other?

Posted
LOL. A little of both. My neighbors don't care, I asked them before I started. And actually its not a bad hobby. I make $200-300 cash per funeral for playing 2 songs.
You need to hit up the Presbyterian churches. We love pretending we're Scottish from time to time.
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Posted
3 minutes ago, Superhero said:

I’m guessing Amazing Grace is one of the songs. What’s the other?

Usually Going Home, sometimes Abide with Me. Unless the deceased was really Scottish and they want Scottish Funeral songs. Usually Flowers of the Forrest, Highland Cathedral and something else they like.

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Posted

There's a high probability that I'm mostly of scottish heritage.  My name, my skin and hair color, etc.


But, I'll still run over any motherfucker that I see in a crosswalk carrying bagpipes. 

Posted
On 12/25/2021 at 2:07 PM, Underdog said:

Jr sent the wife and I a blanket and coffee mug with munchkin's(granddaughter) photos on them.

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Absolutely love that coffee mug. Anytime one of my kids or wife asks me what I want, I ask for a coffee cup. I probably have about 50 now. Some given. Some I bought  A few months ago we were moving stuff around and she asked if I wanted to keep all of them. Most of them are pretty gaudy. I said yes. Each one of them is a story for me. She picked one up at random. "I bought that the day (oldest kid) got her drivers license."  She asked about a few more, and I told her

 

Fast forward to about a month ago. I have a very generic white ceramic coffee cup on my desk at work. She stopped by for something one day. And asked what that one was for. 

"I bought it the morning after our first date." Made her cry a little bit. 

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Posted
On 12/28/2021 at 7:28 PM, Armybrat said:

Wait, you were fucking my wife? Negged, motherfucker.

That asshole should be crowdsourced.

Dude - you gave your wife fire and a wheel on y'all's first Christmas

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Posted
5 minutes ago, Jameslaw121 said:

Fast forward to about a month ago. I have a very generic white ceramic coffee cup on my desk at work. She stopped by for something one day. And asked what that one was for. 

"I bought it the morning after our first date." Made her cry a little bit. 

Narrator: strangely there were another 20 exactly like it in the office break room

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Posted
2 minutes ago, Blotto said:

Narrator: strangely there were another 20 exactly like it in the office break room

I think that's probably what she thought. But I had it next to one from one of our first vacations and one she new about that I got from Beltre's hitting 3,000 hits. She got me tickets to that game. 

Posted
10 hours ago, Gil Bang said:

There's a high probability that I'm mostly of scottish heritage.  My name, my skin and hair color, etc.


But, I'll still run over any motherfucker that I see in a crosswalk carrying bagpipes. 

So I'm safe as long as I stick to official parades, funerals and my backyard?

b-abp3_b__44545.1425416601.386.513.jpg

Posted
On 12/30/2021 at 12:08 PM, Crapinon said:

I'm buying myself this. 

pipes.jpg

When you go camping, take that out and put it on the table as soon as you get to the campground, then unload the rest of your gear.  You'll have the place to yourself in short order.  A tuba works well, too, but takes up too much space.

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Posted
5 hours ago, Scheiss Meister said:

When you go camping, take that out and put it on the table as soon as you get to the campground, then unload the rest of your gear.  You'll have the place to yourself in short order.  A tuba works well, too, but takes up too much space.

LOL. I told some of the guys in our group we could start a reverse mariachi type band. We could hire out to restaurants and play around tables who wouldn't leave after their meal was over.

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Posted
55 minutes ago, Crapinon said:

LOL. I told some of the guys in our group we could start a reverse mariachi type band. We could hire out to restaurants and play around tables who wouldn't leave after their meal was over.

I love bagpipe music.  If I was a major league baseball player, my walkup music would be Scotland The Brave on the pipes.  That said, I have always thought that one could make some money by going to public places and playing the pipes with a tip jar and a sign saying "$5.00 and I'll stop playing fo 5 minutes.  $10.00 and it's 10 minutes."

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Posted

Back in my early working days, our faculty back to school party was held on a Lake Austin  paddle wheel “steamer” cruise boat.
Unbeknownst to us beforehand, a Scottish social club of some sort was also sharing the cruise up to Greenshores & back. For almost the entire two hour round trip, a bagpiper strolled around the main deck piping away like he was marching down the Royal Mile. 
Needless to say, most of my group stuck to the top deck.

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Posted
1 hour ago, Armybrat said:

Back in my early working days, our faculty back to school party was held on a Lake Austin  paddle wheel “steamer” cruise boat.
Unbeknownst to us beforehand, a Scottish social club of some sort was also sharing the cruise up to Greenshores & back. For almost the entire two hour round trip, a bagpiper strolled around the main deck piping away like he was marching down the Royal Mile. 
Needless to say, most of my group stuck to the top deck.

Yeah, I love them and 20-30 mins is max for me. 

Posted
Nice stove but it reminds me of the time my dad bought my mom a microwave for Christmas.

My dad bought my mom whatever was considered the fanciest vacuum at the time and said it was from my siblings and I (we had no idea) one year. He also bought her a Lexus that same year.

Solid troll job.
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Posted

Professor Liechti did that. Said you can take as long as you want on the final, but as soon as the 3 hrs was up he busted out his bag pipes and let it rip. I turned my exam in pretty quickly after that.

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