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Oh shit: New pillow guy lawsuit coming "in two weeks"

Gil Bang

By Gil Bang
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Longhorn_Fan68
Longhorn_Fan68

ohhhh shit  

Underdog
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Pig Bellmont
Pig Bellmont

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Irwin F Fletcher

Irwin F Fletcher 3,550

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Hell yeah, only the best for (shit, can't remember the guy's name from Curb where he's the bookie who Larry thinks eats dog meat).  
I make fun of Mike Lindell and people still need to blame me.  Anyway, weekend of the Alabama game.  Dog meat, blow, and open Bar (none for me) at the Mansion.  I need a +1.  Let's do this.  I knew you love celtics!  
=You'd think a fucking poster named Gil Bang would get a fucking Curb reference.  
Fatawa. So it begins.

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YGIFS

YGIFS 19,452

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Dude, totally do something useful with your week and get me banned.  But first, was it curb or Larry sanders that had the bookie guy for rich people.  And they thought he ate dog?   I was thinking curb.  But now I’m. Not so sure.  

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Beau Vine

Beau Vine 54,430

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Appearing on his own Facebook show, The Lindell Report, the pillow CEO started his defence by claiming his conference was one of the "most important events in American history," and went on to describe how big tech companies and the media conspired against him.

 

He claims he purchased Adwords so that anytime someone searched "Moment of Truth Symposium" or "Mike Lindell's event" it would show an ad for the event directing people to livestreams. He assumed he would see $200,000 resulting from the Adwords, but found they had generated less than $100.

"What they did was totally suppress these events and this Adword," he claimed.

He then complained that Facebook was suppressing him because he had only 300 viewers on his livestream. He then turned his attention to the media, including notably right-wing sites.

"All of the media, including Salem media, Newsmax, Fox, all the media — no one has reached out to me ... Nobody," he said.

He spent a good deal of his time during the event complaining about his portrayal in the media, criticising the New York Times, local broadcasters and newspapers, major networks like Fox News and CNN, and even far-right media outlets like One America News and Newsmax. At one point he even asked a local reporter who covered the event critically to come up on stage so they could "pray for him."

 

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YGIFS

YGIFS 19,452

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At a certain point, coke/crack addicts don't want to keep buying every couple days, or even re-up every week.  They have the cash and the discretion and the free-time during the day to load up for a fortnight.  It's safer and more convenient and they often get a price-break.  

It took me awhile but I've realized Lindell is simply operating under an incredibly clever ruse.  When he releases a video or does a rally or a Tv interview and shouts "In two weeks, we'll prove........."  He's asking his distributor to leave enough product for a two week satiation.  Granted, it's an expensive ruse, but he can afford it.  

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Pato del Muerto

Pato del Muerto 52,600

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Lol he runs his businesses exclusively on that phone?  Real smart, if it’s even possible.  And no cloud backup?  I guess his businesses are at a standstill right now, not making 1100% margins on shredded foam pillows and fine American grown coffee. 

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Grade of D as in David

Grade of D as in David 13,253

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21 minutes ago, Pato del Muerto said:

Lol he runs his businesses exclusively on that phone?  Real smart, if it’s even possible.  And no cloud backup?  I guess his businesses are at a standstill right now, not making 1100% margins on shredded foam pillows and fine American grown coffee. 

Yeah but that's being offset by the fact that he doesn't have his cocaine dealer's phone number and isn't able to make any large purchases

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YGIFS

YGIFS 19,452

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13 minutes ago, Grade of D as in David said:

Yeah but that's being offset by the fact that he doesn't have his cocaine dealer's phone number and isn't able to make any large purchases

"Yo, MLdog......you wanna re-up as usual or?..."

FBI, "Uh...new phone...who dis?"

"Amigo, quit fucking about...you wanna do usual?  Otherwise I got shit to do and folks to meet."

FBI, "Yes, I will take the usual for the week.  Remind me again how much so I can hit the ATM."

"Dude, I don't like texting this shit.  But if you faded, reminder-every week you take 2 balls for you and 2 for your friend 'Donnie J.' or whoever the fuck.  $500 all-in, man you fucking know this."  

FBI, "Yes, yes...that sounds familiar.  I shall visit my local banking institution and contact you post haste.  Have a blessed day."

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YGIFS

YGIFS 19,452

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8 minutes ago, tx 3 putt said:

I've always wondered what idiots eat at hardee's 

I'll give Mike Lindell this much...he's the first coke/crack-head in human history to be asked, when high as a fucking kite, "Hey man I know you blowing rails as fast as you make pillows...but you want to get a red bull & vodka with some ladies and a baggie or choke down Hardee's in Mankota?"  And Mike picked the second one.  He's an original.  

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Al Bundy's Napoleon Hand

Al Bundy's Napoleon Hand 13,587

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35 minutes ago, YGIFS said:

"Yo, MLdog......you wanna re-up as usual or?..."

FBI, "Uh...new phone...who dis?"

"Amigo, quit fucking about...you wanna do usual?  Otherwise I got shit to do and folks to meet."

FBI, "Yes, I will take the usual for the week.  Remind me again how much so I can hit the ATM."

"Dude, I don't like texting this shit.  But if you faded, reminder-every week you take 2 balls for you and 2 for your friend 'Donnie J.' or whoever the fuck.  $500 all-in, man you fucking know this."  

FBI, "Yes, yes...that sounds familiar.  I shall visit my local banking institution and contact you post haste.  Have a blessed day."

"Uhhh... Zippity do da okbuhbye!"

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WhatTheBuck

WhatTheBuck 28,798

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23 minutes ago, tx 3 putt said:

I've always wondered what idiots eat at hardee's 

Hardee’s. They eat Hardee’s. Because only idiots eat at Hardee’s.

Those bastards turned every Burger Chef store I knew into a Hardee’s and I’ll never forgive them for it. It should’ve been the other way around. Burger Chef was great. Hardee’s sucked. 

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YGIFS

YGIFS 19,452

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I think of this story of Mike Lindell and I think of the novel "A Canticle for Leibowitz"   

Centuries from now when they're sifting through the rubble and dust of our once mighty nation.  They'll wonder how it all came to pass?  Why did a nation go to war with itself when it had so much peace and prosperity to enjoy?  How could this have happened, future scholars will ask---albeit in a different tongue?  Well multi, multi-millionaire Mike Lindell was about to release the voter fraud information to the world and reinstall Trump as Godking of these United States.  But this very, very wealthy Mike Lindell chose to pull off the highway  to eat at the shittiest, cheapest garbage burger chain in Mankota, Minnesota instead of a proper meal.  Where, what's that?....the FBI happened to be waiting for him in the drive-thru (this is where a David Foster Wallace/Lobo-length footnote will explain what drive-thrus and even cars were) to seize all his communications which crippled not only his pillow empire...but also prohibited him from sharing with the world why the Godking should take his rightful place.  as such the U.S. waged war upon itself with 300 million dying the first year alone.  And thus began the global cataclysm because Mike Lindell thought Chili's was too fancy.  Also the groundwater is contaminated.  /waltermiller...notthatthefuckingmagareadorknowauthors

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atomheartbevo

atomheartbevo 89,799

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1 hour ago, YGIFS said:

I'll give Mike Lindell this much...he's the first coke/crack-head in human history to be asked, when high as a fucking kite, "Hey man I know you blowing rails as fast as you make pillows...but you want to get a red bull & vodka with some ladies and a baggie or choke down Hardee's in Mankota?"  And Mike picked the second one.  He's an original.  

Lindell would never have been able to keep up with John McAfee

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