Off Grid Alaska

[mooseoutfront 3,646]

4 hours ago, BabaYaga said:

How do they define in weight left on the carcass "edible meat" - heard they try and measure on pounds, so you can't leave more than XYZ pounds of meat on the carcass?

 

https://www.adfg.alaska.gov/static/regulations/wildliferegulations/pdfs/regulations_complete.pdf

Page 22

[mooseoutfront 3,646]

2 hours ago, Ten Bears said:

Where do you go to... you know... rub one out?  Work I'd guess.

I actually addressed this in the other thread.  After living in a one room 400 square foot cabin for 12 years there is no such thing as privacy or shame.  If she's not in the mood to help a brother out I'll rub one out right next to her in bed.  She'll pass me a tissue when it's clean up time.

 

6 hours ago, BabaYaga said:

 

 

What's better to rub one out:  whale blubber or bear fat?

 

I'm more of a silicone guy

[mooseoutfront 3,646]

2 hours ago, Balcones said:

Tell me about living in Leander?  

That seems like a million years ago.  We wax poetic about the choriqueso at Jardin del Rey from time to time.

[mooseoutfront 3,646]

All caught up with the questions. 

I'll post more as things transpire.  Until then...Hook 'Em

[Carl Spackler 3,614]

6 hours ago, mooseoutfront said:

We call them the Varmint Cong.  

Why does that sound familiar to me?

[Chewbacca 7,828]

51 minutes ago, mooseoutfront said:

He stays inside with us.  Sleeps in the bed with us.  He's spoiled.

How does he handle the outside temps when it gets really cold?  Still wanting to go out, or hanging out inside?

[Ten Bears 2,500]

1 hour ago, mooseoutfront said:

All caught up with the questions. 

I'll post more as things transpire.  Until then...Hook 'Em

 

So the only thing between you and -70 F is 6-8" of logs stacked on top of each other?  No insulation?  I guess snow is an insulator. 

"Damn honey I wish it would snow so we could warm up and you could watch me jerk off."

[NotActuallyALonghorn 4,999]

14 hours ago, mooseoutfront said:

What's even worse is there are a couple of Sooners in the area.  The first time I saw someone wearing a Sooner tshirt I looked at my wife and told her that I just couldn't catch a break.

I represent Texas.  I wear Longhorn hoodies and tshirts everywhere.  During the tourist season there is always a group of dipshit Sooner fans or aggy that have to say something or give me the horns down.  My typical response to the horns down is to throw an upside down bird their way.  I'm sure they go back home and tell everyone how they fucked with a sip in Alaska.  Whatever.  I know a dozen places where their bodies would never be found.

You should just tell them that last part with a deadpan face and see what their reaction is. Also, do you do anything with the skins of the animals you kill?

[luke duke 6,449]

All caught up with the questions. 
I'll post more as things transpire.  Until then...Hook 'Em

[Onboard 2.0 9,083]

1 minute ago, luke duke said:

well played 

[Sgt Hulk 14,425]

This thread is epic. You and your wife must love each other. I think I’d feed mine to whatever animal is out there after a week 

[Underdog 29,161]

On 2/8/2022 at 7:11 PM, mooseoutfront said:

I actually addressed this in the other thread.  After living in a one room 400 square foot cabin for 12 years there is no such thing as privacy or shame.  If she's not in the mood to help a brother out I'll rub one out right next to her in bed.  She'll pass me a tissue when it's clean up time.

 

I'm more of a silicone guy

This disappoints me, figure a man living off the grid would use the tried and true method of a spit and curl when rubbing one out. 

[Onboard 2.0 9,083]

1 hour ago, Sgt Hulk said:

This thread is epic. You and your wife must love each other. I think I’d feed mine to whatever animal is out there after a week 

Not if she gets you first ….

[Longhornstampede 3,213]

Awesome thread moose! Tell us a little about your prick neighbour. I can't imagine why someone would be a jerk to a neighbour in such a place where it would be beneficial to have someone nearby who actually likes you.

[hookemATL 12,240]

That may reveal why the guy lives alone in Alaska away from people. Maybe he is doing society a favor by keeping his cuntyness as isolated as possible. 

[smuggs 9,397]

On 2/8/2022 at 6:11 PM, mooseoutfront said:

I'm more of a silicone guy

 

What type of additive keeps this from gelling @ -70 degrees? 

[FartingMonk 3,614]

3 minutes ago, smuggs said:

 

What type of additive keeps this from gelling @ -70 degrees? 

He ain't trying to start the power stroke at -70.  He's got the wood cabin and the stove inside.

[NotActuallyALonghorn 4,999]

I mean, it's a different kind of power stroke...

[Dontshootrude 374]

On 2/8/2022 at 4:12 PM, mooseoutfront said:

We cut all of our own firewood.  We are slowly clearing the trouble trees from around the cabin and cutting a fire break.  Forest fire is my biggest fear, but we don't want to clear cut so we only take 5 or 6 of those trees every Spring and then assess the view/situation.  Beyond that we make a right turn out of our driveway and cut wood with impunity.  We literally live at the end of the road.  Exactly 1 mile from my front door is a ridge that when you drop on the other side of you are on your own.  No cell service, no roads, nothing but trails and wilderness.  You are likely to see anything out there...bears, wolves, moose, caribou.  It's an amazing place that we hike, wheel, and snow machine often.

We have a 35 ton log splitter but I try to split everything I can by hand with an 8 pound maul.  It's my gym membership.  My wife mainly uses the splitter.  She is horrible at splitting wood by hand.  It takes the two of us all spring and summer to bring in 10 cords.  We split it once, stack and cover it.  It then sits for 2 years to cure.  We try to have it all brought in and stacked before September 1 (the first day of the general rifle season for moose).  At that time we have 3 stacks of 10 cords each.  The one that is used for the upcoming winter, cured 2 years.  A stack that has cured 1 year and will be used next winter.  And the green stack that will cure and be used in 2 winters.

That's amazing and probably keeps you in better shape than 99% of the population.  

Have you ever considered installing a rocket mass heater?  Supposedly they use a fraction of the wood, burn way more efficiently, reduce the risks of chimney fires, and are much easier to maintain.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rocket_mass_heater

I've even heard of people incorporating piping in them so they could generate hot water. 

 

[MonkeyDoughnut 10,803]

19 hours ago, Sgt Hulk said:

This thread is epic. You and your wife must love each other. I think I’d feed mine to whatever animal is out there after a week 

[Carl Spackler 3,614]

4 hours ago, Dontshootrude said:

That's amazing and probably keeps you in better shape than 99% of the population.  

Have you ever considered installing a rocket mass heater?  Supposedly they use a fraction of the wood, burn way more efficiently, reduce the risks of chimney fires, and are much easier to maintain.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rocket_mass_heater

I've even heard of people incorporating piping in them so they could generate hot water. 

 

Don't those generally take up more room than conventional stoves?  In a 400-foot cabin, that might be an issue.  

[Dontshootrude 374]

12 hours ago, Carl Spackler said:

Don't those generally take up more room than conventional stoves?  In a 400-foot cabin, that might be an issue.  

It depends. You can build them to your specs obviously, and masonry heaters work really well too and are essentially using the same concept.  It might be a great option for a garage where you have more space but don't want to burn up a lot of wood.  You have to fire it once a day with just a couple of logs and it would heat the area for the entire day with little intervention.

 

 

[Bateshorn 9,989]

Hi, long time listener, first time caller (I.e, I read the whole thread first).  
 

When I lived/went to school in Maine, Moose would occasionally come on campus, usually a mother and calf crossing from one stretch of wilderness to another. We got a warning to stay in our dorms until the local PD could make space for them to go back in the woods. A local cop and at least one hunter told me Moose have zero fear of humans.  Given their size, Why would they?  And they aren’t all that hard to hunt. 
 

Is this your experience?

I’ll hang up and listen. 

[MonkeyDoughnut 10,803]

5 minutes ago, Bateshorn said:

Hi, long time listener, first time caller (I.e, I read the whole thread first).  
 

When I lived/went to school in Maine, Moose would occasionally come on campus, usually a mother and calf crossing from one stretch of wilderness to another. We got a warning to stay in our dorms until the local PD could make space for them to go back in the woods. A local cop and at least one hunter told me Moose have zero fear of humans.  Given their size, Why would they?  And they aren’t all that hard to hunt. 
 

Is this your experience?

I’ll hang up and listen. 

working for uncle in Maine on summer in high school ran across some moose at far distance, astonished by their size... also ran across so called "moose flies"... dear lord... I had no concept that a fly could be so big. Actually more frightening than the moose.

[Bateshorn 9,989]

9 minutes ago, MonkeyDoughnut said:

working for uncle in Maine on summer in high school ran across some moose at far distance, astonished by their size... also ran across so called "moose flies"... dear lord... I had no concept that a fly could be so big. Actually more frightening than the moose.

I actually was going to the gym one time when I walked up to a couple of Lewiston cops manning a barricade for a moose in our soccer field.  They are fucking huge, even at distance.  That was the guy who told me they are dumb, pretty blind, and give no fucks about humans.  Not an animal you want to get crosswise with. 

[BabaYaga 15,623]

20 minutes ago, Bateshorn said:

I actually was going to the gym one time when I walked up to a couple of Lewiston cops manning a barricade for a moose in our soccer field.  They are fucking huge, even at distance.  That was the guy who told me they are dumb, pretty blind, and give no fucks about humans.  Not an animal you want to get crosswise with. 

Remember back when Led Stroud was doing his survivor stuff, the ONLY animal that got him spun up were Moose.  Said in the rut they will charge and murder you.  This includes him being stalked by a Jaguar in the Amazon, lions in Africa, and bears in the mountains.  None got him as scared as being in thick brush and hearing a moose charging in.  

Edited February 11, 2022 by BabaYaga

[MonkeyDoughnut 10,803]

35 minutes ago, BabaYaga said:

Remember back when Led Stroud was doing his survivor stuff, the ONLY animal that got him spun up were Moose.  Said in the rut they will charge and murder you.  This includes him being stalked by a Jaguar in the Amazon, lions in Africa, and bears in the mountains.  None got him as scared as being in thick brush and hearing a moose charging in.  

Fly fishing guide in Colorado said same thing ... wasn't so much worried about bears as they tend to stay away and can usually hear them, but was always afraid of catching a moose off guard as you never knew how they would react.

[RPM 26,614]

2 hours ago, BabaYaga said:

Remember back when Led Stroud was doing his survivor stuff

Survivorman was the real fuckin' deal. 1 man, 7 days, 0 assistance. You're on your own. Now lug all that camera shit yourself and make the trip double long because you have to place and retrieve them yourself every shot. 

[BabaYaga 15,623]

3 minutes ago, RPM said:

Survivorman was the real fuckin' deal. 1 man, 7 days, 0 assistance. You're on your own. Now lug all that camera shit yourself and make the trip double long because you have to place and retrieve them yourself every shot. 

Yeah, heard he had to stop because it just beat the absolute crap out of him time after time.  Loved the show.  When we pivoted and went hard in the paint on Sasquatch, I kind of tuned out.

[Chewbacca 7,828]

2 hours ago, Bateshorn said:

I actually was going to the gym one time when I walked up to a couple of Lewiston cops manning a barricade for a moose in our soccer field.  They are fucking huge, even at distance.  That was the guy who told me they are dumb, pretty blind, and give no fucks about humans.  Not an animal you want to get crosswise with. 

Former mayor of Grand Lake, CO got killed by a moose on his way to church.  Stomped him to death right in the middle of town.  Moose get a wide berth, for sure.

 

https://www.upi.com/Top_News/2006/03/27/Moose-attacks-man-92-on-way-to-church/76961143503573/

[Not a cat 5,807]

2 hours ago, BabaYaga said:

Remember back when Led Stroud was doing his survivor stuff, the ONLY animal that got him spun up were Moose.  Said in the rut they will charge and murder you.  This includes him being stalked by a Jaguar in the Amazon, lions in Africa, and bears in the mountains.  None got him as scared as being in thick brush and hearing a moose charging in.  

I saw that episode when he was being stalked by a jaguar and he definitely seemed spun up.  Not judging, as I'd have pissed my pants.

Someone once told me if a moose charges get behind a tree and do the old looney tunes cartoon trick of spinning around the tree always staying on the other side.  No idea if that actually works, but it sounds good to me.  

[BabaYaga 15,623]

9 minutes ago, Not a cat said:

I saw that episode when he was being stalked by a jaguar and he definitely seemed spun up.  Not judging, as I'd have pissed my pants.

Someone once told me if a moose charges get behind a tree and do the old looney tunes cartoon trick of spinning around the tree always staying on the other side.  No idea if that actually works, but it sounds good to me.  

I was hunting a dried corn field one year and heard two racoons fighting.  At night, it sounds exactly like an axe murderer or a demon from hell sent to eat your face.  Never moved so fast in my life.  Can't imagine a big cat or other apex predator.

[Onboard 2.0 9,083]

3 hours ago, BabaYaga said:

Remember back when Led Stroud was doing his survivor stuff, the ONLY animal that got him spun up were Moose.  Said in the rut they will charge and murder you.  This includes him being stalked by a Jaguar in the Amazon, lions in Africa, and bears in the mountains.  None got him as scared as being in thick brush and hearing a moose charging in.  

Those fuckers are huuuuge. 

[Sbbruin 22,142]

4 minutes ago, Onboard 2.0 said:

Those fuckers are huuuuge. 

[BabaYaga 15,623]

Cool video

 

[RPM 26,614]

1 hour ago, BabaYaga said:

Loved the show.  Then he pivoted and went hard in the paint on Sasquatch, I kind of tuned out.

Same here. But in his prime he was legendary. There's a reason he only did 51 episodes over 7 seasons and they got weaker toward  the end. That takes a toll on a man.

[CooterBrown 18,287]

A friend from Maine said the issue is their eyes don’t reflect light like a deer so they’re a collision hazard at night while you’re driving. You don’t see the moose until it’s too late and 90% of their mass is above your car hood. Hit the moose and it is gonna decapitate you as it turns your ride into a convertible.

[BabaYaga 15,623]

I feel this has happened to @mooseoutfront getting a package

[TexasEd 8,266]

Deep thoughts by Jack Handy:

If Goose is singular and Geese is plural why isn't it Moose and Meese?

 

[TexasEd 8,266]

This story has moose, Alaska, sled, dogs, guns, snow machine, and stomping:

https://nypost.com/2022/02/09/moose-attacks-iditarod-rookie-bridgett-watkins-sled-team-injures-4-dogs/

Edited February 11, 2022 by TexasEd

[BabaYaga 15,623]

10 minutes ago, TexasEd said:

This story has moose, Alaska, sled, dogs, guns, snow machine, and stomping:

https://nypost.com/2022/02/09/moose-attacks-iditarod-rookie-bridgett-watkins-sled-team-injures-4-dogs/

Anyone else get this vibe from the pic?

[BabaYaga 15,623]

Quote

She did carry a .380 caliber gun because there are few people where she trains, and she keeps it to to deter or scare off animals. She has since upgraded to a larger caliber firearm after it didn’t stop the moose.

[Johnny Sack 8,397]

Saw this guy in Colorado last summer 

Edited February 11, 2022 by Johnny Sack

[Brisketexan 106,873]

https://www.caranddriver.com/features/a22604428/what-happens-when-you-actually-hit-a-moose-volvo-has-a-moose-strike-test-for-that/#:~:text=Volvo designs those pieces as,in this type of accident.

Quote

Volvo began moose-strike testing in the 1980s by running one of its cars into a woolly cadaver, a no doubt messy endeavor that led to the development of the surrogates used today. The first-generation dummy comprised bundles of wire and the second contained hoses filled with water, which eventually led to the modern rubber-disc dummy in 2001.

Large animals such as moose represent a special—and potentially deadly—challenge because of their height and high centers of mass. When a passenger car collides with one, it takes out the animal’s legs and introduces its body and/or antlers to the car’s greenhouse; the car’s glass, A-pillars, and windshield header absorb the brunt of the force. Volvo designs those pieces as a system that protects occupants, according to Jakobsson. Most serious injuries in moose/car collisions are due to the collapsing roof and A-pillars or contact with the body of the animal itself, a problem that exists almost exclusively in this type of accident. Also, because deceleration in these events is relatively mild, a car’s airbags usually do not deploy.

Moose-impact testing between successive generations of Volvos (1999–2006 S80s versus 2007–2015 V70s) showed a 36 percent reduction in deformation of the windshield header at the vehicle centerline, which is a big improvement when it comes to protecting front-seat occupants.

 

[Not a cat 5,807]

2 hours ago, Johnny Sack said:

Saw this guy in Colorado last summer 

I was hiking in Colorado with my dog and the trail went around a pond just like that that had a moose just casually eating and watching us.  We couldn't have been more than 20 yards from him.

I got ready to unleash the dog in case it charged us so he'd have to pick one of us to chase.  Fortunately, he left us alone.

The funny thing is my dog never noticed him.  A squirrel farts and he goes crazy but he misses a big ass bull moose staring at us.  

[Kennythetiger 9,618]

I hope you stepped on his foot before you got ready to turn him loose. 

[XYZ 2,154]

Dogs are funny. They lock on to things that move. If you stand still they don’t notice you.

[burntorangebongos 10,826]

I don't think their eyes are as good as our eyes. They experience the world mostly with their nose and the moose was in water so you had the advantage over your dog. 

[Biff Tannen 46,150]

20 hours ago, TexasEd said:

Deep thoughts by Jack Handy:

If Goose is singular and Geese is plural why isn't it Moose and Meese?

 

I say meese.

[Biff Tannen 46,150]

21 hours ago, CooterBrown said:

A friend from Maine said the issue is their eyes don’t reflect light like a deer so they’re a collision hazard at night while you’re driving. You don’t see the moose until it’s too late and 90% of their mass is above your car hood. Hit the moose and it is gonna decapitate you as it turns your ride into a convertible.

If you are driving around Jackson Hole and the Tetons, they are very serious about speed limits because of this.