Is this even fixable? (Stone bench)

[Homercles 10206]

This absolutely pains me to post…it’s got my wife crying and I am in shock.  My normally exceptional 8yo apparently took a river rock to an antique stone bench and broke off the edges…it is/was a prized possession by his godfather (!) as it was one of the only things he got from from his deceased grandmother. Pieces are scattered around the yard.  He did this at a super bowl party when the adults were preoccupied. 
 

See photo.  
 

My son is going to face severe consequences including likely selling his Switch.  I ask for the power of Surly here if anyone knows a firm in Centex that could even take a look at this…provided they can even recover the bulk of the pieces.  Thanks

[Onboard 2.0 9083]

Just now, Homercles said:

This absolutely pains me to post…it’s got my wife crying and I am in shock.  My normally exceptional 8yo apparently took a river rock to an antique stone bench and broke off the edges…it is/was a prized possession by his godfather (!) as it was one of the only things he got from from his deceased grandmother. Pieces are scattered around the yard.  He did this at a super bowl party when the adults were preoccupied. 
 

See photo.  
 

My son is going to face severe consequences including likely selling his Switch.  I ask for the power of Surly here if anyone knows a firm in Centex that could even take a look at this…provided they can even recover the bulk of the pieces.  Thanks

You can always have other children……. Just sayin’.

[Homercles 10206]

To note it’s just the trimming around the edges that are broken off.  The legs and rest of it are ok.  

[UT_OB1 2266]

You have a before picture?  Does it have something sandwiched between the top and bottom?  Maybe some better pictures of current condition?

[Homercles 10206]

34 minutes ago, UT_OB1 said:

You have a before picture?  Does it have something sandwiched between the top and bottom?  Maybe some better pictures of current condition?

Ok will see if I can get anymore.  I think that the black strip is something that was used to start forming it when it was made.  I don’t know.  
 

I guess I want to know if anyone has suggestions on what kind of firm could maybe try to fix this…quick google search got me nowhere.  Headstone repair?

[Gil Bang 26240]

Calm down you drama queen.

[conVINCEd 21477]

There are people that can restore damn near anything if you are willing to open your wallet.  You are probably talking about many multiples of what the bench is worth in unmolested condition.  How important is this to you?

[freyguy 4368]

The kid did yall a favor...

[South Austin 53227]

How much for the Switch?  Game cartridges included?

[Parliament 14598]

You're raising a psychopath.  Boy needs to work (hard labor) to pay for a new one.

[fattyflattie 4640]

I did some destructive stuff during that age. I probably need to call pops and apologize. 

[Homercles 10206]

10 hours ago, Gil Bang said:

Calm down you drama queen.

Yeah I shoulda known better than posting when amped up over this.  Been stressful for a variety of reasons and was playing off my wife stressing, crying, questioning her abilities as a mom…whole shebang.  
 

Point remains he is going to bust his ass to make this right and I don’t know what kind of vendor is out there to fix the thing 

[Quagmire 2148]

Ugly bench would not bang

[MonkeyDoughnut 10803]

Definitely fixable, but would likely require drilling and adding in rebar and using something like quickrete.  Could be done but doubt anyone would do it other than maybe doing it yourself. It also won't have the character it had so might be better to let sleeping dogs lie on this one as far as repairing goes since it's really the sentimental value that was important.

[dingleberryswitzer 2724]

I have no idea but my gut says it’ll be cheaper and easier to just replace the top and keep the feet.  It would take a while for it to get dirty to match the rest of it.

but In all honesty chill out, he’s 8 and is still developing his common sense skills.  Unless you’ve told him before not to hit the concrete bench with a rock he didn’t know it was wrong (Georgeconstanza.gif). 

[CooterBrown 18288]

The cheapest fix is to just tell your wife to not put so much stock in a fucking inanimate object.

[TexasEd 8266]

Are you sure it is stone? (when I hear stone I think natural stone that was carved).  This looks like concrete that was formed in a mold and the dark center part is the reinforcement/rebar.

If concrete, they are for sale all over the place.  Multiple places on I-35 between Austin and San Antonio alone.  You can look around for a copy that used the same mold. My dad taught me that you can age/weather the concreate by using some yogurt in a mix with water to encourage lichen growth.  Google that.

Edit: And just be happy your son was playing outside instead of on the video game.  Kids tear stuff up.  I explicitly have to tell my son not to do certain things because I did them when I was 8.  That is natural for 8 year old boys.

Edited February 18, 2022 by TexasEd

[Dbeasy 15596]

I’m a big believer in holding kids responsible for their mistakes, but also not over-reacting to when they do something stupid, because all kids do stupid things. 

[ztejas 44227]

20 minutes ago, TexasEd said:

Edit: And just be happy your son was playing outside instead of on the video game.  Kids tear stuff up.  I explicitly have to tell my son not to do certain things because I did them when I was 8.  That is natural for 8 year old boys.

 

[Mrs Whiggins 13050]

Much sympathy for you, @Homercles; it's one of those things that really really tests parents.

However, with respect to repair it is likely to be tricky because it is concrete and not a clean break so to speak. That style of garden bench has been made for many many years. Originally, they were carved stone, but I think they've been made from concrete and in production for over a century. My late father was in the ornamental wrought iron business and he used to buy those benches and urns and things to use as display pieces to highlight his work. I will say that some sources are better than others with respect to quality/durability, but I don't know Texas all that well as this was in another state. I've seen them at the big box stores, but I'd be more inclined to go to a place near you that is more like Frazier's Concrete (near Hempstead) that specializes in concrete production pieces. Like was stated before, you may be able to acquire just the top.

If you go with patching it up, I'm not sure how well it will hold up. The sentimentality of the piece makes it more difficult to make the choice, so I can understand wanting to do so.

[Surly Bevo 25748]

[Quagmire 2148]

Agree with others punishment seems harsh for an accident . Unless he did it on purpose and said fuck yo bench

[Homercles 10206]

We aren’t going to sell his switch.  We are going to make him earn privileges back and ‘work off’ the repairs/replacement.  He also had an incident at school this week so tensions are high.  
 

He’s old enough to know destroying someone’s stuff is wrong.  And he kept going after the first chunk broke off.  Him being forthright and honest is why we aren’t going to sell his switch.  
 

Going to explore options but a top replacement seems the best bet to make it work.  If it really was stone I doubt he’d be able to chop away at it like that.  
 

The sentimental element is the hard part.  

[Judge Roybeanbag 11860]

https://www.lowes.com/pd/43-in-Curved-Concrete-Stain-Bench/1002706968?cm_mmc=shp-_-c-_-prd-_-lwn-_-ggl-_-LIA_LWN_243_Planters-And-Outdoor-Fashions-_-1002706968-_-local-_-0-_-0&ds_rl=1286981&gclid=Cj0KCQiApL2QBhC8ARIsAGMm-KHFoXb5a75g-TdTv2zi8pgWRT_1JOkfqKVE9h1m4TU8i4omFw41zLIaAmBOEALw_wcB&gclsrc=aw.ds

 

 

[Mrs Whiggins 13050]

2 hours ago, Homercles said:

  If it really was stone I doubt he’d be able to chop away at it like that. 

If it was carved stone it wouldn't have the metal in it. Going off what I can recall, the cheapest are the basic concrete benches, which are what my father used since his primary focus was on his own work. I think you can also find cast stone which also uses a mold and is made from better materials or maybe more refined(?) but it is essentially also made from concrete. The better outdoor garden stuff is made from this. My dad had some small molds around like that that he used to make lion heads from to duplicate the brass ones that he would put on his gates. Carved stone would be hella expensive, hella heavy and would be something like marble or granite.

[TexEx15 17950]

It will never be the same as it was. With that in mind, try to do some kind of DIY repair and make it a project your son works on with you. It will add to the history behind the object and maybe one day a story your son can tell to your grandchildren.

Your wife will eventually come down from the emotional high and accept it cannot be fixed as if it never happened. In the long run she can hopefully look back and enjoy the added history.

[washparkhorn 9973]

I would caution against making it his last moment of childhood innocence and happiness. (The lesson and meaning of Rosebud in Citizen Kane.)  

But it is none of my damn business. 

Good luck with bench. 

[Judge Roybeanbag 11860]

Kids do some weird shit sometimes in the moment.  LSB - when I was about 4, I liked to dress up like a cowboy and had my cap pistols and shit. My mom went to some social gathering at one of the small-town hoi polloi's house - we were considered lower class because my dad was a school teacher and not a land-owning farmer like the rest of the folks there.  So she was already on thin ice.  Anyway, these folks had a nice stone house and in the beautiful backyard had a fish/koi pond surrounded by stone and flower pots.  Mom sent me to the back yard with a bunch of girls, who were taunting me and telling me my guns weren't real and I wasn't a real cowboy.  So I said "sure I am, watch this", and proceeded to pop caps, and with every pop I kicked a flower pot into the fish pond.

Not only did I break at least two terra cotta pots, the dirt killed all the fish in the pond and my mom was pretty much shunned from that group after that. I don't think I even got whipped for it, but man I remember it now because of how stupid I was without considering the consequences or my mother.  The most beautiful thing was, I think she probably laughed about it afterward.

[South Austin 53227]

[Bernard 879]

When Joel cracked his mom’s prized glass egg, his dad sent him out rake some leaves in the back yard. Looks like your yard could use some raking. Later, when Joel’s dad found out Joel was accepted to Princeton, the whole broken egg deal was pretty much forgotten. Be like Joel’s dad.

Bernard

[fattyflattie 4640]

For reasons unbeknownst to anyone, I once beat our outdoor unit with a bat. Just fucking batting practice for some reason. I wasn’t trying to be a dick. Wasn’t mad. Just hit it and I guess it felt right, so I did it several hundred more times.  Kids do inexplicable shit, and a lot of the times it isn’t malicious per se. So far my kids have been much, much, better than I was. 

[Bevo 13896]

14 hours ago, Judge Roybeanbag said:

when I was about 4, I liked to dress up like a cowboy and had my cap pistols and shit. My mom went to some social gathering at one of the small-town hoi polloi's house - we were considered lower class because my dad was a school teacher and not a land-owning farmer like the rest of the folks there.  So she was already on thin ice

Hoi polloi means commoner - It seems like you meant to say muckety-muck.

[Prepuce of Doom 21286]

26 minutes ago, Bevo said:

Hoi polloi means commoner - It seems like you meant to say muckety-muck.

Or perhaps poobah. 

[former alkie 72]

Kids ruin stuff........always have and always will.......same as puppies.

FWIW, I'd leave it as-is and leave it where it is, or maybe move it to a garden area.

Then, y'all will have a story for years to come, when visitors ask "what happened to the bench".........or you'll smile about it for years to come when you glance at it.

 

[Deej 77827]

On 2/18/2022 at 11:52 AM, Quagmire said:

Agree with others punishment seems harsh for an accident

 

[South Austin 53227]

On 2/18/2022 at 11:12 AM, CooterBrown said:

The cheapest fix is to just tell your wife to not put so much stock in a fucking inanimate object.

 

[deadshank 24654]

A cast stone fabricator could make a new top piece for you.  You’d have to give whats left of the original and they would use it as the form to make the new mould.  
 

It won’t be cheap but it’s less expensive than a hysterical wife with a newly formed drinking problem that will use you as the target of derision. 
 

Do you know a cast stone fabricator that owes you a favor?
 

 

Edited February 20, 2022 by deadshank

[Onboard 2.0 9083]

4 minutes ago, deadshank said:

A cast stone fabricator could make a new top piece for you.  You’d have to give whats left of the original and they would use it as the form to make the new mould.  
 

It won’t be cheap but it’s less expensive than a hysterical wife with a newly formed drinking problem that will use you as the target of derision. 
 

Do you know a cast stone fabricator that owes you a favor?
 

 

That bench is the #54, 60" version in just about any garden center.

[midtown 3355]

When my wife at the time and I lived in NYC we bought a hand blown $500 vase from an art gallery.  Fast forward 8 years later.    Somehow my 4 yr old got up to the third bookshelf and pulled it down and it shattered.  We were unhappy for a day and then got over it

[deadshank 24654]

1 hour ago, Onboard 2.0 said:

That bench is the #54, 60" version in just about any garden center.

You think his old lady is gonna go for that?  Haven’t you been married?

[Onboard 2.0 9083]

6 minutes ago, deadshank said:

You think his old lady is gonna go for that?  Haven’t you been married?

No need to get rude...... : )

[RDCanecutter 26893]

1 hour ago, midtown said:

When my wife at the time and I lived in NYC we bought a hand blown $500 vase from an art gallery.  Fast forward 8 years later.    Somehow my 4 yr old got up to the third bookshelf and pulled it down and it shattered.  We were unhappy for a day and then got over it

Yep, pretty sure "Glass Vase" and "4 Year Old" are opposing choices in the game of life.

[William_Cannon 86]

A cast stone fabricator could make a new top piece for you.  You’d have to give whats left of the original and they would use it as the form to make the new mould.  
 
It won’t be cheap but it’s less expensive than a hysterical wife with a newly formed drinking problem that will use you as the target of derision. 
 
Do you know a cast stone fabricator that owes you a favor?
 
 

This.

….Or you could look on YouTube how to cast concrete.

[Nice Guy Eddie 13731]

I don’t even see how a punishment is needed here, outside of telling him that breaking things can hurt people. My guess is that the bench wasn’t in perfect shape anyway and someone sitting on it would have eventually broken off that piece. I bet if you asked your son, he would mention seeing a crack in it.

Don’t sell the switch but use some money to take your wife to counseling before her overreaction harms your son. It’s a crumbling stone bench. Geez.

[Dr Fear 1290]

You should spend some quality time with your son building something that he is in to, like one of those cool tie fighter lego sets or a jet fighter model.  Then you should smash it with a bat in front of him and ask him how it made him feel.
 

[NeverMarryAStripper 22300]

You should beat your child with that River rock so he knows how the bench felt.  Be sure and tell him that this is going to hurt me more than you before you start.

[Quagmire 2148]

You should bang your sons teacher on that bench.

[Homercles 10206]

Thanks for the replies and the surly humor.  Went a little overboard on the original post, was a stressful moment and the guy who’s bench got destroyed seems to have forgotten what it was like having little kids.  Here’s a better pic of it…any rec on a centex cast stone fab place?

[freyguy 4368]

Just turn it around.

[Js1 87184]

23 hours ago, Dr Fear said:

You should spend some quality time with your son building something that he is in to, like one of those cool tie fighter lego sets or a jet fighter model.  Then you should smash it with a bat in front of him and ask him how it made him feel.
 

No, the wife should smash it with a bat as retribution