Family member you are most embarrassed of

[Francisco 2.0 32432]

This thread ought to be moved to IPIHB.

I have a very, very small family so there aren't many members that I can't stand, or are embarrassed of.  But my two cousins, yeah.  

On the day of our grandmother's funeral, one spent that day in jail due to a DUI  on his way to the funeral.  The other showed strung out on something.   In the weeks after the funeral, both of them sued my mother because as my mom was the executor of my grandmother's estate, they did not like the will.  That was over 30 years ago, and I've not seen or spoken to either since. I have no idea if they have kids of their own, marital status, whatever.  Both failed to show up to both the visitation and funeral of their own mother 20 years ago.  The youngest reached out on Facebook to me 4 or 5 years ago, and I promptly deleted his request.  I don't know why both turned out to be the pieces of shit they became, but I suspect it had something to do with their dad passing away in the late 80's from cancer.  

I've got a love/hate relationship with my youngest brother.  I'll save that for later.

[40acredropout 2908]

6 hours ago, Born to Run said:

7 hours ago, Crapinon said:

At one time, emu's were THE get rich scheme. Buy them, breed them and sell them. King of the Hill did a pretty good show on the lunacy. Kind of like chinchillas in the 60's. 

One rancher I used to work for bought a bunch of them in the early late 80s. They all got fried when lighting hit the tree they were huddled under during a storm.

I’m fascinated w the entire story but specifically curious about your best guess of year when it happened?

[40acredropout 2908]

6 hours ago, nnm said:

Not really a family member, but a member of an extended community I’m a part of is so obsessed with a rival that he pens endless screeds exposing their cultish behavior. Again and again 

Sweet of you to consider us a community.  Randy Duke, take a bow.

[52-80 19274]

my newborn son.  he shits himself in his sleep.  lmao the idiot.

[52-80 19274]

19 hours ago, CooterBrown said:

Over a decade, my cousin stole around $400K from our grandma. She repeated 3rd grade. She had 2 kids by two different prisoners at the prison where she worked as a guard. She already had 2 other kids. She was too lazy to register the kids for school so the oldest didn’t start kindergarten until he was 8. While in Houston, her boyfriend’s friend shot her in the gut in a robbery to steal the $10K she had in her purse for a tit job. Her kid got bit by a copperhead and while at ER told the doctor she didn’t feel well and they save her life from a blood clot resulting from that old gunshot wound. The family praised Jesus for watching over her. Her dad, the enabler, gave her his 7 series BMW since she needed a car. She let her 12 YO borrow it to go to the mall 35 miles away. That 12 YO had a kid a year later making her a mid 30s grandma.

Outside of funerals, I haven’t seen any extended family since I went to UT in 1990. I don’t regret that decision. Hearing this shit from my parents is bad enough.

 

[Caponata 151]

On 4/1/2022 at 5:03 PM, GhostOfTomJoad said:

My maternal grandfather faked his own death in hopes of collecting on an insurance policy.

In '76 he reappeared, massively upsetting the apple cart. I remember being hauled into a room and being instructed to greet this guy we'd never met before with a hardy "hello grampa" cheer when he came through the door. Tough to sort out at 7.

Anyway, dipshit walks in the door then immediately falls over drunk into a cactus plant. They peel him off it, see dozens of quills sticking in his face and torso and scoop him up to take him to the ER.

The grand finale is he was fiercely Italian, with one of the most Italian names imaginable. Years later we discovered he was adopted & was Irish/German with not a drop of Italian blood in him.
 

Can't stop laughing at this 

[GhostOfTomJoad 9381]

57 minutes ago, Caponata said:

Can't stop laughing at this 

Man if cell phones existed back then that video would have been priceless. It's hard to imagine how fucked up that moment was. My birthing device (she was anything but a mother) was already well on her way to becoming an alcoholic just like her father. But she and her identical twin sister didn't know he was a drunk since he vanished before their 5th birthday. They thought he was dead for almost 25 years until word started to spread that "Skip" (helluva nickname for a guy who skipped out on his family) wasn't dead after all.

The guy had served in WWII as every able-bodied guy did back then. After the war he worked for the railroad in the Twin Cities. He concocted a scheme whereby he appeared to fall off a cargo train en route to Chicago. No body was ever found, obviously. Strangely, his insurance policy didn't list his wife or two infant daughters as beneficiaries, but instead a lifelong buddy from the war. Rumor is the buddy collected ten grand, took a small cut, and got the rest to Skip who was living with his 2nd family outside of Chicago.

His return caused his daughters to fall down deep into a well of alcoholism. Nobody else really seemed to be shocked that he was a fraud. His "widow" had remarried within 6 months of his "death" because Gramma a) knew he was a loser and b) needed a man to provide for her young twins.

The grand re-introduction took place at our aunt's apartment across town. I think this was at the insistence of my dad who was traveling on business and refused to let Skip in our house. My sisters and I spent hours sitting in a room with our 3 year old cousin, watching the twins get more and more drunk in anticipation and wondering what they would say to him. 

But the cactus plant. Fuck. There was a fad in MN in the mid '70s for people to have these huge, potted cactus plants in their house. Or maybe it was just our trashy neighborhood. They were an odd status symbol. The cactus had been brought back from my gramma and (step) grampa's trip to AZ. The thing was 3 or 4 feet tall with long, sharp needles. We children weren't allowed within 3 feet of it (let's revisit the brilliance of placing it near the door to the apartment). When Skip stumbled into that thing upon entering the apartment he was fucking impaled. His drunk friend who'd driven him there was trying to peel him off of it while the twins shrieked in horror. My middle sister asked us if we still had to call him "grampa." My therapist had a hard time not laughing when I told her this story twenty years later.

The dude died (cirrhosis of the liver; surprise) 5 years later. He spent his remaining years living on the sofas of his drunk friends. But he had great hair, drove a Buick, and was always speaking Italian and trying to teach it to us the handful of times we were forced to see him. Dad divorced about 18 months after Skip showed up since it was apparent Skip just wanted to make up for lost time with his twin daughters by getting drunk with them on their dime. Good times.

[MNLonghornFUKM 8835]

I have an uncle George who’s a know it all for everything and let’s everyone in the room know how smart he is.

One day he told us how he kept the water he used to boil hot dogs in and ate it later as “weenie water soup.”


Another time he told us how to make instant tomato soup by boiling water and adding ketchup.


Haven’t seen him in probably 8years now.

[Guest Lobo]

I'm guessing he died 7 years ago from drinking tepid hot dog water.  Sorry for your loss.

[NeverMarryAStripper 21999]

On 4/1/2022 at 4:29 PM, Moby Ric said:

For some posters here, it is themselves that fit this description.

 

 

Edited April 3, 2022 by NeverMarryAStripper

[52-80 19274]

1 hour ago, MNLonghornFUKM said:

I have an uncle George who’s a know it all for everything and let’s everyone in the room know how smart he is.

One day he told us how he kept the water he used to boil hot dogs in and ate it later as “weenie water soup.”


Another time he told us how to make instant tomato soup by boiling water and adding ketchup.


Haven’t seen him in probably 8years now.

Throw a rib in there and baby you got a stew going

 

[pearlandhorn 3275]

Where’s the link to the holiday thread?

[Brothahorn 10087]

On 4/1/2022 at 9:35 PM, atomheartbevo said:

On the one hand, I somewhat agree with this.  It should not reflect upon us.  And I'm not sure if "embarrassment" is even the right word in a lot of cases, because we are talking about family members, and not something embarrassing like an ex-gf who walks up to you in a group of people and starts joking that if you claim you have a 7-inch dick, it's really more like 6.9 or even 6.8  inches.  That is something out of your control and embarrassing, but family members?  Plenty of us have a Cousin Eddie in the family tree and if there is embarrassment, it's more about the negative impact he may have on his immediate family members and less about reflecting upon you.

On the other hand, I have a qanon in-law who is more than happy to try and educate everybody else about things like how our COVID vaccines are going to make her sick because spike proteins or other stupid fucking conspiracy theories.  The fact that she spent around 6 or so years at UT does not help, although she did not graduate.  Honestly, it would be fantastic and not embarrassing if her conspiracy theories were about mundane things like JFK or UFOs, but they aren't.

And I'm aware of the saying that it's easy to fool somebody, hard to convince them that they've been fooled, and it's even more of an apt saying in this day and age of social media.

Here's the problem, and maybe you have a better word for it than "embarrassment", but when said qanon relative starts popping off around a group of people you know about how vaccines are about tracking your movement or how she has to now mask up because vaccinated people are shedding spike proteins that will kill her, it becomes "embarrassing" in the sense that other people are looking at you like "why aren't you getting her help for her mental health problems?" as if there is a failure on your part for not helping her.  

So it becomes an "embarrassment" not in the sense of what she believes, but in the sense that you aren't helping her to get help, so you are failing her.

It's like if an aggy relative walked up to you in a group of people and started talking about how aggy is going to win the SEC this year and play for the championships, and the other people in the group are looking at you like "that's coming in right over the plate, how are you not even trying to swing at that?"

In the grand scheme that's just a crazy relative. We all have those, especially when it comes to politics. That's not really a reflection on you, unless you told her that shit.

 

Try having an uncle who tried to cut his wife's head off before killing himself. Or his oldest son who is basically doing life in Tennessee Colony for being a pedo. Or his second oldest son who is/was a crackhead on the run for non payment of child support and is also a pedo. Imagine the awkard conversation and looks when people find out you are related to those guys. And grew up with them.

[Sbbruin 21904]

22 hours ago, Brothahorn said:

In the grand scheme that's just a crazy relative. We all have those, especially when it comes to politics. That's not really a reflection on you, unless you told her that shit.

 

Try having an uncle who tried to cut his wife's head off before killing himself. Or his oldest son who is basically doing life in Tennessee Colony for being a pedo. Or his second oldest son who is/was a crackhead on the run for non payment of child support and is also a pedo. Imagine the awkard conversation and looks when people find out you are related to those guys. And grew up with them.

Sounds like it’s in the genes.

 

[Sbbruin 21904]

23 hours ago, pearlandhorn said:

Where’s the link to the holiday thread?

You have been crowned king of that thread.

[pearlandhorn 3275]

Spending more and more time with my parents lately.  It's a little more eye-opening when I notice things like my parents aging.  My mom (63 tomorrow) has lost about 30 pounds and is doing absolutely fantastic.  She's exercising daily, loving retirement, wanting to travel and spend time with her grandson.  My dad on the other hand...oof.  Massively obese, couch potato, never taken his health seriously, smoker for 50+ years but he won't smoke around anyone in the family because I guess he's embarrassed about it.  We all know though so it's a game of "cat and mouse".  They recently came to stay at our house this last weekend and my dad spent literally all day Saturday on the couch watching TV.  He was "awake" for 15 hours and was in front of the TV for 13.5 hours on Saturday claiming that his back was hurt from a fall he took over a week ago that he just now went to the doctor for.  When he's not traveling, he wakes up at 5:30 every morning, goes to his coffee group at 7, gets home around 8:30 or 9 and naps on the couch or watches TV until lunch, eats lunch, then naps again until dinner, eats dinner, then falls asleep on the couch until 9:30 when he'll go to bed.  He has undiagnosed sleep apnea and will snore to the point where my mom has kicked him out of the bed and he sleeps across the house.  When I stay at their house, his snoring will wake me up and we are 3 rooms away.  All he wants to do is eat as it's his vice or outlet.  What REALLY sucks is that he just doesn't seem to care about interacting with his only grandson.  My mom will take my son places, do things, etc.  My dad makes excuses on why he can't go - their dog, his sister, he doesn't feel good, can't walk that far. 

He constantly complains that all my mom wants to do is travel and he will find excuses to not go and it's holding her back terribly.  My mom and I think he has some undiagnosed depression as well due to some shit with my brother.  He's on antidepressants, high blood pressure meds, type 2 diabetic, and it's honestly like he's a ticking time bomb.  All he wants to do is talk about food and it's infuriating.  I have absolutely nothing in common with him.  My mom has been harping on him for 40+ years and he hasn't changed a damn thing.  My mom and my FIL are fun grandparents. 

[Crapinon 2280]

On 4/3/2022 at 9:44 AM, MNLonghornFUKM said:

I have an uncle George who’s a know it all for everything and let’s everyone in the room know how smart he is.

One day he told us how he kept the water he used to boil hot dogs in and ate it later as “weenie water soup.”


Another time he told us how to make instant tomato soup by boiling water and adding ketchup.


Haven’t seen him in probably 8years now.

I'm convinced you could sell a "weenie water" base tomato ketchup soup to someone. Maybe Waffle House or Cracker Barrel. 

[SHOOTER12 8840]

1 hour ago, Crapinon said:

I'm convinced you could sell a "weenie water" base tomato ketchup soup to someone. Maybe Waffle House or Cracker Barrel. 

That post still makes me laugh until I have tears running down my face and can't catch my breath. 

[CooterBrown 18038]

I'm convinced you could sell a "weenie water" base tomato ketchup soup to someone. Maybe Waffle House or Cracker Barrel. 

Kinda like renaming beef broth “bone broth”. Hipsters will love it.

[Brothahorn 10087]

7 hours ago, pearlandhorn said:

Spending more and more time with my parents lately.  It's a little more eye-opening when I notice things like my parents aging.  My mom (63 tomorrow) has lost about 30 pounds and is doing absolutely fantastic.  She's exercising daily, loving retirement, wanting to travel and spend time with her grandson.  My dad on the other hand...oof.  Massively obese, couch potato, never taken his health seriously, smoker for 50+ years but he won't smoke around anyone in the family because I guess he's embarrassed about it.  We all know though so it's a game of "cat and mouse".  They recently came to stay at our house this last weekend and my dad spent literally all day Saturday on the couch watching TV.  He was "awake" for 15 hours and was in front of the TV for 13.5 hours on Saturday claiming that his back was hurt from a fall he took over a week ago that he just now went to the doctor for.  When he's not traveling, he wakes up at 5:30 every morning, goes to his coffee group at 7, gets home around 8:30 or 9 and naps on the couch or watches TV until lunch, eats lunch, then naps again until dinner, eats dinner, then falls asleep on the couch until 9:30 when he'll go to bed.  He has undiagnosed sleep apnea and will snore to the point where my mom has kicked him out of the bed and he sleeps across the house.  When I stay at their house, his snoring will wake me up and we are 3 rooms away.  All he wants to do is eat as it's his vice or outlet.  What REALLY sucks is that he just doesn't seem to care about interacting with his only grandson.  My mom will take my son places, do things, etc.  My dad makes excuses on why he can't go - their dog, his sister, he doesn't feel good, can't walk that far. 

He constantly complains that all my mom wants to do is travel and he will find excuses to not go and it's holding her back terribly.  My mom and I think he has some undiagnosed depression as well due to some shit with my brother.  He's on antidepressants, high blood pressure meds, type 2 diabetic, and it's honestly like he's a ticking time bomb.  All he wants to do is talk about food and it's infuriating.  I have absolutely nothing in common with him.  My mom has been harping on him for 40+ years and he hasn't changed a damn thing.  My mom and my FIL are fun grandparents. 

Besides the obese part, Pops is living my retirement life. Although there may be a few beers instead of coffee some days.

[Sweetnsourpoke 171]

I check these threads mainly to see if I have family members posting on surlyhorns. 

[Guest Lobo]

3 hours ago, Sweetnsourpoke said:

I check these threads mainly to see if I have family members posting on surlyhorns. 

What up fam? 

[Vegas64 678]

On 4/3/2022 at 9:44 AM, MNLonghornFUKM said:

I have an uncle George who’s a know it all for everything and let’s everyone in the room know how smart he is.

One day he told us how he kept the water he used to boil hot dogs in and ate it later as “weenie water soup.”


Another time he told us how to make instant tomato soup by boiling water and adding ketchup.


Haven’t seen him in probably 8years now.

[fattyflattie 4639]

On 4/2/2022 at 4:57 PM, GhostOfTomJoad said:

Yep. Late '80s - mid '90s every other guy you'd run into was trying to convince you to buy into emus.  If you listened to them they'd tell you they were gonna be the biggest, can't miss ranching opportunity ever. I'm sure a few people made a couple bucks, but the rest of 'em got stuck with 5' tall birds that would bite the shit out of you.

One kicked me in the thigh once, when loading them into a trailer at my buddy's house (his dads place).  Motherfucker ripped me wide open.  Fuck those things. Wannabe Ostrich fucks.

[gernblansten 3198]

On 4/3/2022 at 9:44 AM, MNLonghornFUKM said:

I have an uncle George who’s a know it all for everything and let’s everyone in the room know how smart he is.

One day he told us how he kept the water he used to boil hot dogs in and ate it later as “weenie water soup.”


Another time he told us how to make instant tomato soup by boiling water and adding ketchup.


Haven’t seen him in probably 8years now.

Have you checked the kitchens at The French Laundry and Le Bernardin?

[Shoxthemonkey 1983]

Wayne Pankratz, the executive director of operations for American Franchise Capital, which owns 50 Applebee's franchises in the Midwest, called on the company to lower wages for workers already hit hard by soaring gas prices and inflation.

I share a great grandfather with this asswipe.

[Sbbruin 21904]

15 minutes ago, Shoxthemonkey said:

Wayne Pankratz, the executive director of operations for American Franchise Capital, which owns 50 Applebee's franchises in the Midwest, called on the company to lower wages for workers already hit hard by soaring gas prices and inflation.

I share a great grandfather with this asswipe.

 

[Shoxthemonkey 1983]

43 minutes ago, Sbbruin said:

 

It should should make the Stucky/Goering 2022 Reunion interesting. Anybody know what Wayne is up to these days? Working at Arby's? Cool

[Beau Vine 54489]

On 4/3/2022 at 9:44 AM, MNLonghornFUKM said:

One day he told us how he kept the water he used to boil hot dogs in and ate it later as “weenie water soup.”

[Beau Vine 54489]

On 4/3/2022 at 9:44 AM, MNLonghornFUKM said:

I have an uncle George who’s a know it all for everything and let’s everyone in the room know how smart he is.

Unfortunate that he didn't teach you about apostrophes.

[Beau Vine 54489]

My sister and I have one thing in common -- we both made a 750 on the SATs.  I made a 750 on the math section; she made a 750 on the whole thing.  She married an aggy who's a pretty good guy who made a lot of money in P.E.  

But when we moved back to Texas in 1999, we spent a weekend at her house.  She must have dropped about 100 n-bombs.  The best man at my wedding (which she attended) was black.  That's the last time I have seen her in person.  I'd be shocked if she's not at least partially bought into Q-anon.  My brother told me last year that he wasn't going to talk to her any more, and I said, "What took you so fucking long?"

I don't think she's worked a day since she got married, yet she has a maid, and I regularly hear about how she's too busy to help my 91-yo dad, even though she lives 20 minutes from him.  

[Underdog 28824]

On 4/4/2022 at 4:00 PM, Crapinon said:

I'm convinced you could sell a "weenie water" base tomato ketchup soup to someone. Maybe Waffle House or Cracker Barrel. 

Or to this clown and his moronic minions... 

I’ve done the ketchup/hot water once after seeing it on a Happy Days episode. 

Edited April 9, 2022 by Underdog

[Scheiss Meister 8416]

Nmnm

Edited April 12, 2022 by Scheiss Meister

[MissingInAction 25244]

My biological father. He is a racist ignorant piece of shit and he doesn't care who knows it. He also thinks it's perfectly OK to assault people if they piss him off. He is always pissed off. Can't believe he isn't In jail. 

He sold all my stuff while.i was in the army because everything I've ever done or earned is his in his fucked up brain. 

Just typing this makes me want to beat him senseless.

I can't wait till he dies so I can shit on his grave.

[Guest Lobo]

Eric, I'm most embarrassed for Eric.  And that's my first name.  He should do the honorable thing and swallow.

[High Plains Drifter 11054]

 

My father was a raging alcoholic. Never abusive, not a mean drunk, but embarrassing as hell when drunk, which was pretty much anytime 2 hours after he got out of bed.

For most of my life, I couldn't stand to be around him, even going back to when I was a kid, and didn't really realize what was going on. I just knew I was embarrassed by him. I dreaded him coming to my little league games, because of the way he would act. In high school, I never brought friends to the house. Complete embarrassment. He died (of cirrhosis, surprise surprise) before I had my kid, and I'm kind of glad because he would have wanted to do family things with her/us, which I wouldn't have been able to take.

 

 

Edited April 12, 2022 by High Plains Drifter

[nnm 36745]

49 minutes ago, High Plains Drifter said:

 

My father was a raging alcoholic. Never abusive, not a mean drunk, but embarrassing as hell when drunk, which was pretty much anytime 2 hours after he got out of bed.

For most of my life, I couldn't stand to be around him, even going back to when I was a kid, and didn't really realize what was going on. I just knew I was embarrassed by him. I dreaded him coming to my little league games, because of the way he would act. In high school, I never brought friends to the house. Complete embarrassment. He died (of cirrhosis, surprise surprise) before I had my kid, and I'm kind of glad because he would have wanted to do family things with her/us, which I wouldn't have been able to take.

 

 

Too bad he didn’t get to know Coach Dale. 

[Foosters 17896]

4 hours ago, MissingInAction said:

My biological father. He is a racist ignorant piece of shit and he doesn't care who knows it. He also thinks it's perfectly OK to assault people if they piss him off. He is always pissed off. Can't believe he isn't In jail. 

He sold all my stuff while.i was in the army because everything I've ever done or earned is his in his fucked up brain. 

Just typing this makes me want to beat him senseless.

I can't wait till he dies so I can shit on his grave.

Son?

[Born Burnt 6188]

On 4/3/2022 at 7:26 AM, GhostOfTomJoad said:

Man if cell phones existed back then that video would have been priceless. It's hard to imagine how fucked up that moment was. My birthing device (she was anything but a mother) was already well on her way to becoming an alcoholic just like her father. But she and her identical twin sister didn't know he was a drunk since he vanished before their 5th birthday. They thought he was dead for almost 25 years until word started to spread that "Skip" (helluva nickname for a guy who skipped out on his family) wasn't dead after all.

The guy had served in WWII as every able-bodied guy did back then. After the war he worked for the railroad in the Twin Cities. He concocted a scheme whereby he appeared to fall off a cargo train en route to Chicago. No body was ever found, obviously. Strangely, his insurance policy didn't list his wife or two infant daughters as beneficiaries, but instead a lifelong buddy from the war. Rumor is the buddy collected ten grand, took a small cut, and got the rest to Skip who was living with his 2nd family outside of Chicago.

His return caused his daughters to fall down deep into a well of alcoholism. Nobody else really seemed to be shocked that he was a fraud. His "widow" had remarried within 6 months of his "death" because Gramma a) knew he was a loser and b) needed a man to provide for her young twins.

The grand re-introduction took place at our aunt's apartment across town. I think this was at the insistence of my dad who was traveling on business and refused to let Skip in our house. My sisters and I spent hours sitting in a room with our 3 year old cousin, watching the twins get more and more drunk in anticipation and wondering what they would say to him. 

But the cactus plant. Fuck. There was a fad in MN in the mid '70s for people to have these huge, potted cactus plants in their house. Or maybe it was just our trashy neighborhood. They were an odd status symbol. The cactus had been brought back from my gramma and (step) grampa's trip to AZ. The thing was 3 or 4 feet tall with long, sharp needles. We children weren't allowed within 3 feet of it (let's revisit the brilliance of placing it near the door to the apartment). When Skip stumbled into that thing upon entering the apartment he was fucking impaled. His drunk friend who'd driven him there was trying to peel him off of it while the twins shrieked in horror. My middle sister asked us if we still had to call him "grampa." My therapist had a hard time not laughing when I told her this story twenty years later.

The dude died (cirrhosis of the liver; surprise) 5 years later. He spent his remaining years living on the sofas of his drunk friends. But he had great hair, drove a Buick, and was always speaking Italian and trying to teach it to us the handful of times we were forced to see him. Dad divorced about 18 months after Skip showed up since it was apparent Skip just wanted to make up for lost time with his twin daughters by getting drunk with them on their dime. Good times.

Pos rep for "my birthing device."

[ImissWallyPryor 9046]

Do my Surly brothers count as family?

[Guest]

12 hours ago, High Plains Drifter said:

 

My father was a raging alcoholic. Never abusive, not a mean drunk, but embarrassing as hell when drunk, which was pretty much anytime 2 hours after he got out of bed.

For most of my life, I couldn't stand to be around him, even going back to when I was a kid, and didn't really realize what was going on. I just knew I was embarrassed by him. I dreaded him coming to my little league games, because of the way he would act. In high school, I never brought friends to the house. Complete embarrassment. He died (of cirrhosis, surprise surprise) before I had my kid, and I'm kind of glad because he would have wanted to do family things with her/us, which I wouldn't have been able to take.

 

 

My dad left us when I was 9.  I saw him one day when I was 16, and that caused more questions than it answered.  My grandmother( his mom) loved us grandkids dearly and always wished for a reunion.  Later in life, she tried to make it happen, and she was crestfallen when neither my brothers nor I were inclined to make the effort.  I loved this woman and count her as one of my role models on family commitment( and other things) in life; however, I told her straight up, " I forgive him for what he did and I no longer have any animosity towards him; but he never gets a shot at my kids' feelings.  Ever.  He rescinded that opportunity years ago." 

I couldn't agree with your last line more.  That would have killed me for him to hurt my boys after the way I grew up.

[Longboard Horn 40608]

On 4/12/2022 at 12:23 PM, MissingInAction said:

My biological father. He is a racist ignorant piece of shit and he doesn't care who knows it. He also thinks it's perfectly OK to assault people if they piss him off. He is always pissed off. Can't believe he isn't In jail. 

He sold all my stuff while.i was in the army because everything I've ever done or earned is his in his fucked up brain. 

Just typing this makes me want to beat him senseless.

I can't wait till he dies so I can shit on his grave.

Sorry you have that kind of father. Here's a song you can play at his funeral. 

 

[lateshow 1308]

On 4/2/2022 at 2:44 PM, futureman said:

none of them. I come from the finest stock. we are all doctors and lawyers and scientists. 

nm

Edited April 22, 2022 by lateshow
I don't read threads

[Armybrat 40942]

On 4/4/2022 at 3:00 PM, Crapinon said:

I'm convinced you could sell a "weenie water" base tomato ketchup soup to someone. Maybe Waffle House or Cracker Barrel. 

Bob Stoops would be a daily patron.

[Longboard Horn 40608]

Still waiting for @FloridaHorn to chime in over here. 

[FloridaHorn 4776]

51 minutes ago, Longboard Horn said:

Still waiting for @FloridaHorn to chime in over here. 

This is a difficult topic, as almost all of my family is equally embarrassing. As I have mentioned in other threads, my mother's side of the family is a complete trainwreck.

My maternal Grandmother had 4 children, whom she decided to name Sherry, Jerry, Garry, and Larry. My maternal Grandfather died at a young age from chronic alcoholism. There are too many grandkids and great grandkids to count, but they are all equally fucked up in their own right. 3 People in this family have managed to get a college degree, me, my son, and my daughter. The rest of the lot still reside in various parts of Ellis County, so beware when you travel through that area.

 

Sherry - the oldest of the lot is a total Bible thumper with 3 children. She and her husband own the compound where several family members towed their homes to live. She has a set of 350lb female twins and an openly gay son who she disowned when he came out as an 18 year old at the family Thanksgiving dinner.

Jerry - My mother...married 7 times, but single and lived with her mother and Garry for the last 15 years of her life. Over the years, she managed to talk me out of over $100K in loans, which I never saw a penny of. The last of the money was given to her before Christmas in 2007, so she could buy presents for my kids. My son got a book and a backpack, my daughter got a JC Penney's dress, and my mother bought herself a $400 digital camera to record the whole event. The irony of the camera purchase is that she did not own a computer to download the pics.

Garry - The real gem of the group, a raging Redneck and Bigot. He has never held a steady job, and lived with his mother for over 30 years of his adult life. When his mother passed away, it took Garry a whole 3 weeks to fall asleep while smoking and burn the beloved trailer house down. He now lives on the compound, in a travel trailer that he affectionately refers to as the "Pussy Palace." Garry is an alcoholic, and a pot head. He inherited the above mentioned trailer when his mother died. After the fire, he was given a little over $30K in insurance money (this was a really nice place. LOL) He spent most of the money on pot and budweiser, but managed to save enough to purchase a used 24' travel trailer as his dream dwelling. His son spent 14 years in the state prison, for manufacturing and selling meth. My brother was one of his main customers.

Larry - Looks like Bozo, but with black hair. Worthless as the rest of the family, but somehow thinks he is above them. He has been on disability for about 20 years, though none of know exactly why.

 

 

I will try and come back later and post a few Uncle Garry stories.

 

 

[mininghorn88 2313]

7 minutes ago, FloridaHorn said:

This is a difficult topic, as almost all of my family is equally embarrassing. As I have mentioned in other threads, my mother's side of the family is a complete trainwreck.

My maternal Grandmother had 4 children, whom she decided to name Sherry, Jerry, Garry, and Larry. My maternal Grandfather died at a young age from chronic alcoholism. There are too many grandkids and great grandkids to count, but they are all equally fucked up in their own right. 3 People in this family have managed to get a college degree, me, my son, and my daughter. The rest of the lot still reside in various parts of Ellis County, so beware when you travel through that area.

 

Sherry - the oldest of the lot is a total Bible thumper with 3 children. She and her husband own the compound where several family members towed their homes to live. She has a set of 350lb female twins and an openly gay son who she disowned when he came out as an 18 year old at the family Thanksgiving dinner.

Jerry - My mother...married 7 times, but single and lived with her mother and Garry for the last 15 years of her life. Over the years, she managed to talk me out of over $100K in loans, which I never saw a penny of. The last of the money was given to her before Christmas in 2007, so she could buy presents for my kids. My son got a book and a backpack, my daughter got a JC Penney's dress, and my mother bought herself a $400 digital camera to record the whole event. The irony of the camera purchase is that she did not own a computer to download the pics.

Garry - The real gem of the group, a raging Redneck and Bigot. He has never held a steady job, and lived with his mother for over 30 years of his adult life. When his mother passed away, it took Garry a whole 3 weeks to fall asleep while smoking and burn the beloved trailer house down. He now lives on the compound, in a travel trailer that he affectionately refers to as the "Pussy Palace." Garry is an alcoholic, and a pot head. He inherited the above mentioned trailer when his mother died. After the fire, he was given a little over $30K in insurance money (this was a really nice place. LOL) He spent most of the money on pot and budweiser, but managed to save enough to purchase a used 24' travel trailer as his dream dwelling. His son spent 14 years in the state prison, for manufacturing and selling meth. My brother was one of his main customers.

Larry - Looks like Bozo, but with black hair. Worthless as the rest of the family, but somehow thinks he is above them. He has been on disability for about 20 years, though none of know exactly why.

 

 

I will try and come back later and post a few Uncle Garry stories.

 

 

I laughed. I creid.  Kudos to you for rising above.

[DallasHorn26 586]

My sister (no pics). My parents allowed her to drop out of school and get married at 16. She then left her husband who worked an oilfield job for a crack dealer. She would sneak the crack dealer over while her husband was home and he would hide under their trailer house. They eventually ran off to a crack motel together where she was busted in a major federal trafficking case at the age of 18. Since her 3 1/2 year stint in the federal pen about ten years ago, shes upgraded to a meth head about twice her age and has a son with him. Im pretty sure he’s never held a job for more than two weeks and she never has. They are squatting in a house with no electricity or running water. They dumpster dive and steal for food/money. Last I heard, the kid hasn’t been in school in a year because they’re concerned about CPS involvement. Meth head also had a partial foot amputation due to infections and recently had a below knee amputation on his other leg.

[NeverMarryAStripper 21999]

I feel for that kid

[DallasHorn26 586]

I feel for that kid

Me too. If I knew whereabouts, I’d make an anonymous call, but the info I’m getting is also hearsay. I know others have tried before and nothing came of it.