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2022 Fuck Fantasy Football

shadow_operative2.0

By shadow_operative2.0
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ChickenSandwich
ChickenSandwich

Davante Fucking Adams!!!! Bring on the white claw, let’s make some bad Monday decisions!!!

Zepol87
Zepol87

Lol started Trey Lance with Tua on the bench. Moron

closetohumping
closetohumping

Got drunk last night and sent out five trade proposals and unfortunately one got accepted.   Gibson/dk and I got lamb back. 🙄

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Hank_Hill

Hank_Hill 20126

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On 12/12/2022 at 5:24 PM, Hank_Hill said:

Up by 60+ (depending on how Hopkins finishes here) going into round 1 week 2. Can’t wait to see how I Sark this lead.

Kirk Cousins has begun the Sarkening it appears

edit: jk he’s the greatest 

Edited by Hank_Hill
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shadow_operative2.0

shadow_operative2.0 16321

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On 12/12/2022 at 9:28 PM, shadow_operative2.0 said:

Anyone get fucked by Rhamondre tonight? I had two VERY small leads with him left, thank jesus I didn't need anything. 

On 12/16/2022 at 2:44 PM, gyroprotagonist said:

 I was up slightly and had him vs Nick Folk.  so yes, yes i did get proper folked by him and lost by 2 points. 

Sat him this week with his supposedly bum ankle, will likely be the reason I'm chillin' next week. 

 

Stupid sport. 

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CurlyDumps

CurlyDumps 4665

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I'm probably going to lose because I benched Stevenson as well. Now I need13 points from Christian "Worthless" Watson who will  leave with an injury after his first catch tomorrow night.

I had Dobbins, Kamara, Chubb, and Stevenson, and basically had to make a decision yesterday on whether or not I start Dobbins or risk waiting on Stevenson, with my only other option being Raschaad White, who I knew was going to suck. And of course not one of those fucking assholes could fall into the end zone. Zero non-QB TD's from my team.  Oh and the dick-shriveling Commies DST also clutched up by doing literally nothing tonight. 0 sacks, 0 turnovers against the dogshit Giants.

Edited by CurlyDumps
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shadow_operative2.0

shadow_operative2.0 16321

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7 hours ago, shadow_operative2.0 said:

Welp, the immortal Jerick fucking McKinnon ends my ‘22 FF season. Why a glorified 3rd-string RB is even starting in the playoffs of a 10-team league is odd, but 30 fucking pts says otherwise.  

3 hours ago, shadow_operative2.0 said:

Sat him this week with his supposedly bum ankle, will likely be the reason I'm chillin' next week. 

I'm almost scared to post this for fear of a stat correction, but... 

Spoiler

Fa-U7b6i5e-VVY.png

Slayton caught his last pass for no gain with 2:14 left, but fumbled & recovered for -1 yd. That single yard was the sole difference. Luckiest win (No jinx!) of my LONG fantasy life. 

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ChickenSandwich

ChickenSandwich 10000

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8 hours ago, shadow_operative2.0 said:

I'm almost scared to post this for fear of a stat correction, but... 

  Hide contents

Fa-U7b6i5e-VVY.png

Slayton caught his last pass for no gain with 2:14 left, but fumbled & recovered for -1 yd. That single yard was the sole difference. Luckiest win (No jinx!) of my LONG fantasy life. 

Our league has a stat correction last night on yahoo after the game. First it took away 2 pts from team A who was in the lead and now trailing, then came back later and did another correction adding back +.8 changing the lead again back to team A. 
 

Some salty MFers

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gyroprotagonist

gyroprotagonist 2597

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12 hours ago, shadow_operative2.0 said:

Sat him this week with his supposedly bum ankle, will likely be the reason I'm chillin' next week. 

 

Stupid sport. 

i had him benched all week, but put him back in the lineup because yahoo said he was changed from questionable to healthy right before game time. thought about just leaving him on the bench but then faded my first intuition as i normally get it wrong.

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DougO

DougO 5269

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This is one of the shittiest fantasy seasons of my ancient fantasy football life, maybe the shittiest.

I do two very long-running leagues, 12 teams. In one league I was smashed with massive injuries to just about every good player I had.  Horrible start of like 1-4, even though I still scored fairly well consistently. I recovered and slowly climbed my way back with waiver wire pickups and putting out the best lineups I could. Won two, then lost three to just shitaass luck. No matter how many points I scored, it seemed like every team I played that week had their best game and scored crazy points, even the shit teams. I finished winning my last 5 games for an 8-7 record. I scored the second highest number of points for the season to finish barely over .500. 
 
In the final game I needed two of three teams to lose that were one game ahead, but I played one of them, so I could take care of that one. I beat his ass 120-105,despite his qb Kirk Cousins scoring huge in the big historic OT shootout comeback. The other two were playing shitass teams, just needed one of them to lose to get in the playoffs. One of their opponents left a starting spot empty, and then had Jonothan Taylor get knocked out early. He also had AJ Dillon playing last night, who was off to a 20 point first half, then he got knocked the fuck out with a concussion. The team I needed him to beat won the game by 6 with 77 shitty points, FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK! 

The other team I need to lose won 88-81.

My second league was almost the opposite. I started off well at 5-2, then got hit by the injuries and bye week bullshit. Players I picked up got hurt. Players that were consistently good went to shit for various reasons. Then just had shittass luck with opponents scoring ridiculous over their average against me. Ended with a 2-6 run, despite having scored 3rd best in total points, losingass record, 7th place. This league was a surefire playoff team for me, but couldn't catch a god damn break. At one point the shittiest team in the league scored 174 points on my ass. Then a couple of weeks later against one of the teams ahead of me the same asshole left four starting spots open with injured and bye players and scored 50 and gave the other asshole a free win with shitty points. That one was a back-breaker. 

Just one of those crazy years where the schedule fucked me in the ass. If I played any other teams' schedule I probably would be ballin' for the championship yet again. 

Oh well, fuck all this bullshit.

Shit is what it is, and I can take it. But what really pisses me off is motherfuckers that puss out when they aren't winning and stop taking care of their lineups and at least put a reasonable starting lineup of live bodies in. It just fucks the the entire league and shifts the outcomes. You gotta keep playing and not screw the other teams, and sometimes if you try you can make some tremendous second half combacks like I have several times. 

Oh well, ain't nobody gonna read this longass shit, anyway. If I had a life I wouldn't give a fuck, either.

 

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heinhorn

heinhorn 16

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Start/Sit advice please!!!  QB options:

Hunter Lawerence at the Jets on a short week of practice in mid 40's weather with a 50% chance of rain

Derek Carr at Pittsburgh in 12 degree weather.

or do I pick up Gardner Minshew at Dallas and start him once they declare Jalen Hurts out officially?

I need to sit one of the following 6 players:

Josh Jacobs/Joe Mixon/David Montgomery

Tee Higgins/Michael Pittman/Adam Thielen.

Tough decisions to make this week in round one of the playoffs.

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CurlyDumps

CurlyDumps 4665

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This is fantasy football:

I  suffer through months of Kamara never fucking scoring, injuries, a suprise inactive at 5AM, and still grind my way to the playoffs. Finally he has a good match up, he's a top 15 ranked play, and he's even  talking to the media about getting his production back on track. Everything is aligning for the bounce back game I have been desperately waiting for.

Then Atlanta's DC has a heart attack during pregame warm-ups. New Orleans scores three 50 yard passing touchdowns to JAGs you've barely heard of. Kamara has another meh game. I lose by six.

And this week Kamara has 90 yards and a TD.

Edited by CurlyDumps
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Blackcat00

Blackcat00 775

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Kamara just put me in my championship game next week for 3k. 

That idiot has picked it up with Ingram going down but Miles Sanders is now starting to shit the bed. 

 

1 hour ago, CurlyDumps said:

This is fantasy football:

I  suffer through months of Kamara never fucking scoring, injuries, a suprise inactive at 5AM, and still grind my way to the playoffs. Finally he has a good match up, he's a top 15 ranked play, and he's even  talking to the media about getting his production back on track. Everything is aligning for the bounce back game I have been desperately waiting for.

Then Atlanta's DC has a heart attack during pregame warm-ups. New Orleans scores three 50 yard passing touchdowns to JAGs you've barely heard of. Kamara has another meh game. I lose by six.

And this week Kamara has 90 yards and a TD.

 

Edited by Blackcat00
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DougO

DougO 5269

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On 12/20/2022 at 10:25 AM, DougO said:

T
 
In the final game I needed two of three teams to lose that were one game ahead, but I played one of them, so I could take care of that one. I beat his ass 120-105,despite his qb Kirk Cousins scoring huge in the big historic OT shootout comeback. The other two were playing shitass teams, just needed one of them to lose to get in the playoffs. One of their opponents left a starting spot empty, and then had Jonothan Taylor get knocked out early. He also had AJ Dillon playing last night, who was off to a 20 point first half, then he got knocked the fuck out with a concussion. The team I needed him to beat won the game by 6 with 77 shitty points, FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK! 

The other team I need to lose won 88-81.

 

 

My 5th place consolation team has outscored every playoff team this week, by a lot. That means if assholes actually took care of their lineups in the weeks prior my team would be playing for the Championship next week.

Fuck fantasy.

 

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Blotto

Blotto 24048

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Entered two leagues this year . Made the playoffs in both. In each league, all my players were finished and I was up a few points, but each opponent also had D Hopkins still to play last night.

Any of his previous game performances this season would have been enough to easily knock me out of both playoffs. And then that beautiful bastard throws up a performance that matches his career low.

That dude has wrecked shop for me in past seasons when I had him on some squads, and now he's still doing it on my opponents teams. Dude is probably my all time FF MVP after that wet fart of a performance. How old is too old to buy DeAndre Hopkins fathead wall decor.... asking for myself. 

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Hank_Hill

Hank_Hill 20126

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7 hours ago, Blotto said:

Entered two leagues this year . Made the playoffs in both. In each league, all my players were finished and I was up a few points, but each opponent also had D Hopkins still to play last night.

Any of his previous game performances this season would have been enough to easily knock me out of both playoffs. And then that beautiful bastard throws up a performance that matches his career low.

That dude has wrecked shop for me in past seasons when I had him on some squads, and now he's still doing it on my opponents teams. Dude is probably my all time FF MVP after that wet fart of a performance. How old is too old to buy DeAndre Hopkins fathead wall decor.... asking for myself. 

I mean if you want to give credit where it’s due, get you a McSorley fat head. Dude looked like shit. Hop was visually frustrated.

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shadow_operative2.0

shadow_operative2.0 16321

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On 12/25/2022 at 7:22 PM, ballrific said:

needed cheetah to have more targets today...in a tough spot, only up 5 and opponent has Williams and Allen tmw. I have Ek but its not looking good. Thank god its not ppr or Id really be done... 

3 hours ago, Tailgate said:

I’m up by 16. Opponent has K. Allen tonight. I’ve got Dicker. 

Rather lucky on Keenan’s play down the sideline. 

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