Your professional faux pas & blunders

[Superhero 9017]

My boss at my first job was an introvert and only talked about work, when he actually talked. There was rarely any feedback good or bad for 12 months until the annual review, at which time he said he said he expected me to contribute more to the department (which I tried to do by offering ideas to streamline processes within the department, but was always shut down because "we're doing it this way because we've always done it this way.".

Anyway, during one review, I told him flat out that I didn't like working with him.

We sat in silence for 5 minutes before he said "Well, I don't know what to say, so let's talk about it later." which we never did. We pretended it never happened and life went on. I stayed at the company for a few more years until I decided to move to be closer to family. He wasn't a bad guy, just really quiet, and I learned never to be like him when I started managing people.

[Celery Man 21094]

This.

I got lucky and didn’t have to learn this from my own experience. My boss did something similar when I was first starting out and warned me about it.

So now, I go over to the person and tell them that the rep/customer/whoever not internal is a fucking idiot and then tell that person I’ll reply to their email diplomatically because I know they’ll just forward my email with the bullshit answer of “see below”.

I work on the engineering side and I know the dumbass sales people don’t know what the fuck I’m saying they’re just trying to make the sale or get the issue off their plate.

I had an account manager who was terrible like that. People complained, his boss came by asking me for feedback on him, I talked about some of the horrible situations he put my guys in with customers and how he would pester people in the bathroom. Guy got fired.

[You don't know me 1163]

10 hours ago, Celery Man said:

 

I had an account manager who was terrible like that. People complained, his boss came by asking me for feedback on him, I talked about some of the horrible situations he put my guys in with customers and how he would pester people in the bathroom. Guy got fired.

 

Was his name Taylor Hamm?

[Fudge Nuggets 19453]

On 6/14/2018 at 9:30 PM, AUS-97HORN said:

The importance of the outlook 2013 (and now 16) feature of "ignore/delete this conversation" cannot be understated.  It has saved me numerous rage-inducing-thoughts to respond with snark and unprofessional-ism's.

My therapeutic go-to move is hit 'Reply', delete ALL email addresses from all fields; then type up the most wretched, vile and disgusting response imaginable.  Read it to myself a couple of times then hit the 'X' at the top right.  It always makes me feel better and puts me in a better frame of mind before I send the real response.

[davidg 4057]

2 hours ago, Fudge Nuggets said:

My therapeutic go-to move is hit 'Reply', delete ALL email addresses from all fields; then type up the most wretched, vile and disgusting response imaginable.  Read it to myself a couple of times then hit the 'X' at the top right.  It always makes me feel better and puts me in a better frame of mind before I send the real response.

Gotta be careful about this.  I know a guy that had a business and dealt with homeowners all the time.  He got into an argument with a obstinante customer about an issue with the job and wrote a regular letter where he raged on the guy.  Had a temp show up in the office and went ahead and mailed the letter instead of chunking it in the trash like his normal secretary.   I believe he ended up discussing it on camera with Marvin Zindler!

[You don't know me 1163]

6 minutes ago, davidg said:

Gotta be careful about this.  I know a guy that had a business and dealt with homeowners all the time.  He got into an argument with a obstinante customer about an issue with the job and wrote a regular letter where he raged on the guy.  Had a temp show up in the office and went ahead and mailed the letter instead of chunking it in the trash like his normal secretary.   I believe he ended up discussing it on camera with Marvin Zindler!

Probably slime in the ice machine.

[honolulu horn 6226]

On 6/7/2018 at 12:23 AM, deadshank said:

I once introduced two guys at a job site, completely forgetting one guy had 3 fingers missing on his right hand and the other had a really deformed alien right paw hook thing. 

They shook "hands" and laughed their asses off over it. I sat amazed and was glad I forgot about their hands and totally free from any sort of anxiety. The certainly weren't too worried about it. 

The literal definition of "faux paws," well done.

[CoTex 1177]

I'm at an advocacy workshop with people from all over the country learning/practicing skills to advocate for people with problems.  In advocating for my hypothetical client I described him as "lacking paternal influence and role models."

Apparently that's not cool anymore because I got the "our world is full of people raised by single mothers, this is not a negative trait."

I pushed back with "yeah, but obviously in a perfect world he would have had a father and mother...."

That made it worser.

Oops.

#getoffmylawn

Edited July 14, 2018 by CoTex

[Grade of D as in David 13255]

5 hours ago, CoTex said:

I'm at an advocacy workshop with people from all over the country learning/practicing skills to advocate for people with problems.  In advocating for my hypothetical client I described him as "lacking paternal influence and role models."

Apparently that's not cool anymore because I got the "our world is full of people raised by single mothers, this is not a negative trait."

I pushed back with "yeah, but obviously in a perfect world he would have had a father and mother...."

That made it worser.

Oops.

#getoffmylawn

[TankedBevo 2500]

On 6/14/2018 at 9:04 PM, HornPhD said:

Where the fuck do you work? 

Sounds like a blacksmithing foundry to me 

[Sandman 3430]

My one-handed boss made a surprise visit yesterday. Thank God I was on the phone and didn't make myself look like an idiot again.

[Brewin’1up 34]

CSB.

Not me, but the wife, so maybe this should go in the Wives thread?

One summer while I was going to school I worked with my BIL for his grandfather’s asbestos abatement company. It was hard work, but I needed a job and the pay was good. I was the only white guy on any of the crews, so naturally I picked up some of the more “colorful” Spanish words and phrases. Occasionally, I’d let one slip around the wife (GF at the time). Eventually we got to the point that we’d jokingly use “chingos” in everyday conversations.

At the time, the wife (GF) worked for the school district doing anti-drug/violence prevention presentations. One day she was meeting with a group of school administrators - the principal, VP, counselor, and security guard (all Hispanic). The VP asked her if she had any more of the flyers from her presentation. She replies that she has “chingos” more in her car. They all look at her shocked, and the security guard busts out laughing.

He says, “What did you just say…?”

She replies, “Yes, I have chingos in my car.”

He says, “That’s what I thought I heard. Do you know what that means?”

Her, “It means “a lot”.

Him, “Hahaha… it means “a fucking lot”… hahaha”.

Her, “OMG”.

They all got a laugh out of it, but agreed that she shouldn’t use that word at work.

[Brothahorn 10097]

ht

https://www.dailydot.com/irl/chicago-dick-appointment-text/

[Trey3216 15452]

45 minutes ago, Brothahorn said:

ht

https://www.dailydot.com/irl/chicago-dick-appointment-text/

[Gladeite 376]

My first job out of school was in Houston and a commission based job.  After working about a year I became the top producer in the company.  There were about 25 other salesmen/women at the time.  So, I get the bright 23 year old idea to go talk to the owner.  My speech was effectively, "I am making it rain, so pay me accordingly."  Next day, the owner changed my market area and I no longer made it rain.  Kept me like that for a month.  Lesson was learned.

[frog 30]

This is not my story and it doesn't quite fit, but I'm telling it here anyway.

 

I went to school with surly's Rex Kramer.  We had a class where we learned about various primitive tribes around the world.  The teacher showed a video of this one tribe who would club each other in fights, had no outside contact with civilization, etc.

Rex Kramer has to do a presentation in Spanish class.  So he asks the first teacher if he could borrow the video. 

He takes the video home and finds the part where the tribes are fighting and goes to bed.  [spoiler: his roommates do not go to bed]

Rex gets up in Spanish class and, in espanol, tells the class about the tribe and the fights, etc.  He hits play on the video and his roommates had found a part where they show a closeup of a live birth on camera.   

Loud gasps from his classmates are heard followed by Rex's "Lo siento....lo siento..."

[ImissWallyPryor 9046]

I was in my mid-20s and on my first visit to my Fortune 500 company’s home office.  The top executive offices were in the old main building, which as a tower that reminded me of UT’s Main Building. 

My regional manager and I met with a VP just before lunch, and he invited us to the formal executive dining room on the top of the tower. As we were walking to the elevators, my manager mumbled to me that the VP must really like me because this was the first time that even he’d been invited to the big boy dining room.

We get on the elevator with a half dozen executives who looked like the CEO had chewed their asses that morning.  I’m trying to look like I fit in and am used to this sort of thing.

I lean back against the wall, and I feel a whole panel of buttons click. I turn around to see about 20 floors were lit. The buttons were the old-fashioned kind that stick out from the wall. 

It was a very long and quiet ride to the top floor.

I told everyone at lunch that I was aggy. 

[Ojo Rojo 2053]

I've done a lot of stupid shit as a professional.  One time I had a hearing in county court.  I was representing the plaintiff in a simple collections case and the defendant had never shown up for anything, never filed an answer, never responded to my letters or phone calls.  So we're at the hearing, and I ask the judge if we could take up some other matter in the case.  The judge asked if I had noticed the issue for a hearing and I said no, but the defendant never shows for anything so I thought we could just go ahead.  She asked me, "Don't you think that would violate Rule 21 of the Texas Rules of Civil Procedure?" I didn't know what the fuck Rule 21 was so I had to say, "I don't know."  The judge just looked at me incredulously and asked if there was anything else.  Rule 21 is one of the most rudimentary rules of civil procedure that says everything you file in court has to be noticed to the other side.  Basic due process.  I felt like a real idiot that day.

[Washpark 176]

a reporter at a major US publication and my outside counsel have the same first name. an email exchange with a person currently being investigated and me discussing a dinner was obtained by said reporter. i thought i was emailing outside counsel.

 

[CooterBrown 18287]

Years ago during my first year as a project manager, I agreed to some "minor" scope creep on a $75,000 project.  I left the company about half way through the project. When it was all said and done that scope creep cost my old employer about $350,000 in labor. Oh well, I got out while the gettin' was good.