Would you press charges? (incident at middle school)

[Foosters 17860]

If in fact you do have the option to unilaterally decide whether or not to press charges, I would decline to do so. I understand the rationale for wanting to though. I worked a couple of years in a juvenile court, and have my reservations about the prosecution of kids under 15 or so.

[chainsaw 9873]

35 minutes ago, Foosters said:

If in fact you do have the option to unilaterally decide whether or not to press charges, I would decline to do so. I understand the rationale for wanting to though. I worked a couple of years in a juvenile court, and have my reservations about the prosecution of kids under 15 or so.

I respect your perspective. Not sure I agree, but I can respect it.

Is the victim part of some kind of disadvantaged group, or somehow disabled? I know there are a bunch of special rules that apply pretty strictly for public schools when it comes to accommodations and equality. Like colleges have to have a whole "trial" if there's a possible hostile environment for women students, and you see this when there's like a rape allegation. I know the victim is a boy and the aggressor is a girl, but maybe there's still a way to get these special rules to apply. Just throwing out ideas if you don't want to "press charges" here.

[SquishMitten 10422]

Since there's 4 pages, I assume someone has said this, but ... tell the school to do their fucking job and file a police report. There's no reason that should be your responsibility. You and your son don't need to have any involvement. If the police come to question him, just say he doesn't remember. He thought he fell. Had no idea he was pushed until the principal called you. Tell them you heard there was a video and that's all you know. If your kid gets bullied because of it, tell him to have a prepared response. Something like "fuck off, I don't even know who you are."

[Deej 76866]

Pay some bigger kid to look after him. 

 

[RexWilson 1348]

3 minutes ago, Deej said:

Pay some bigger kid to look after him. 

 

 

[LW Goatman 1124]

6 minutes ago, SquishMitten said:

Since there's 4 pages, I assume someone has said this, but ... tell the school to do their fucking job and file a police report. There's no reason that should be your responsibility. You and your son don't need to have any involvement. If the police come to question him, just say he doesn't remember. He thought he fell. Had no idea he was pushed until the principal called you. Tell them you heard there was a video and that's all you know. If your kid gets bullied because of it, tell him to have a prepared response. Something like "fuck off, I don't even know who you are."

This is where I'm at. Asking do you want to press charges, like someone suggested above, is the school asking if you want them to get the police involved. I can't even comprehend how failing to report an assault on campus is not contrary to policy. They need to do their job as an admin and report to the policing function who then should be obligated to turn over the case to the DA, regardless of whether you want to "press charges". Otherwise, they are failing to protect the students safety and well being. 

[LW Goatman 1124]

Page 3 of the round rock student handbook places an obligation on the admin to report it, like someone said, tell them to do their job.

Reporting Crimes (Page 3)
The principal or campus behavior coordinator and other school administrators as appropriate
shall report crimes as required by law and shall call local law enforcement when an
administrator suspects that a crime has been committed on campus.

https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/0B_Y0f6SUnConcG83YlpBZVFfN2s?resourcekey=0-4ffA4waraEgMbVwJFmsYjw

Mandatory Placement: Misconduct That Requires DAEP Placement (Page 15)
A student must be placed in a DAEP if the student:
 Commits an assault (see glossary) under Penal Code 22.01(a)(1).

[You don't know me 1161]

I was 2 years younger than everyone else in my grade.  I was also small for my age, so I was the smallest kid until I was in 10th grade.  7th and 8th grade were hell.  I was bullied quite a bit by a couple of other kids.  It sucks keeping your head on a swivel all the time.  I'm not sure about pressing charges, as nothing I went through came close to being pushed down a flight of stairs.  I seriously suggest that you have a conversation with your son.  My immediate thoughts, as a parent, are to press charges.  Then when I think back on my experiences, I'm not sure that I would have wanted my parents to do that on my behalf.  Kids are fucking brutal.

I also highly recommend that you try to get your son to join the wrestling team (if the school has one or if there is a club) or get him into some self-defense classes as soon as possible. Kids don't tend to fuck with wrestlers.

[TexasEd 8067]

3 hours ago, Texzilla58 said:

This is a terrible incident and I can’t figure out why a criminal assault on video didnt cause immediate arrest and expulsion. But juvenile law these days ain’t what it used to be. She needs a few weeks at a JB work camp chopping cotton.

Anyway I would go to school and record the conversation. Ask why the child hasn’t been charged. Ask if there have been other incidents why hasn’t it been handled previously? What are her parents doing about this; are the defiant and dismissive or fretting g about their evil ass spawn?

Folks here have asked how you would feel if the next time she hurts another kid. Your kid is that kid because the school and the previous parents did nothing. Seems to me the school and district has liability to you and should be named in a lawsuit. Are they screening this kid because she is the seed of the local mafia Don or MS13 capo?

I believe that charges should be filed immediately. If nothing else it will force the parents to face facts. The girl will not see a trial or go into the system unless she is a serial stair pusher. Hopefully she is moved to a different school, she and parents have to go to counseling, and they have to pay restitution.

My one incident with mine was when he was in sixth grade. Wife called and said our son got in a fight; you go handle it. My son was the youngest in his class and small but he was always scrappy. Got to school and my kid is sitting calmly in the principals office. Across the room is a black kid that is six feet tall and big, with a black eye, and blood caked nose, and teary eyes.

Principal calls me in. Says our policy requires both be suspended for three days. The big kid out there is two years older than your son and outweighs him by 100 pounds. “Your kid beat the living shit out of him; it’s something I’ve been hoping for someone to stand up to that shithead. He’s a terrible bully and will be a problem if no one fixes him. Hopefully your son has taught him the lesson we can’t. In the old days I would have given your kid a media.”

After getting the story my son did the right thing. Dude was picking on his friend, my son stepped in to help and took a punch, then went on him like he was Scott Farkus. The thing is the bully quit, and became friends with my son. He graduated high school and went to college.

Lesson: some kids respond to simple rules, others need a kick in the nuts to get back inside the guardrails. Now is the time to jerk her into the seriousness of the situation. Maybe she gets straight, might not, but you have to take action and file charges.

 Middle School is “Lord of the Flies”

[Kwix 2192]

3 hours ago, Hmbre97 said:

Wow, this thread blew up.  Thank you to everyone for your input. 

To fill in some info gaps, I'm on the east side of Round Rock so it's not the hood but it's not Eanes ISD either. I don't know for sure what the punishment is for the other student other than the principal telling us that our son wouldn't be seeing her around school for a while. I don't know if that means at-home suspension, ISS, or moving to an alternate campus. It's very annoying that the school officials want to speak in riddles since they can't give specifics.

I talked with my son more about it last night. He seems unphased by it. I did hear him over the weekend talking to his friends on discord and he told them he thought he tripped until he overheard the principal telling his grandmother they saw someone push him when they watched the security tapes so I don't think he's BS'ing about knowingly getting pushed. He did mention to my mom yesterday when she picked him up from school that he's going to start holding onto the handrail while going down the stairs just in case. 

A side story to this, he's been bugging us for a phone since last year because most of his friends had them. Then when he went back to school this year, one of his teachers took a poll in one of his classes of students who had phones and he said he was one of only a few who didn't. Fast forward to Friday when this happened, the nurse asked him if he could call his parents and when he said he didn't have a phone, she seemed surprised. So when my mom got there to pick him up, the nurse and principal were saying it would be a good idea to get him a phone in case of emergencies. I finally relented and got him one this weekend so he's been on cloud 9 about that. He even said last night in a joking manner he was glad he got pushed because he finally got a phone as a result.

 

Anyway, we're going to move forward with pressing charges so I'm sure I'll check in with updates once things progress.

 

 

I'd be pressing for the girl to be removed from that school (and your son's future high school) permanently.

[Grade of D as in David 13253]

14 minutes ago, TexasEd said:

 Middle School is “Lord of the Flies”

I have been saying for years that we should ship all 12 year olds to an island and just let the ones that survive to 15 reenter society.

[Post Oak 20254]

4 hours ago, Texzilla58 said:

This is a terrible incident and I can’t figure out why a criminal assault on video didnt cause immediate arrest and expulsion. But juvenile law these days ain’t what it used to be. She needs a few weeks at a JB work camp chopping cotton.

Anyway I would go to school and record the conversation. Ask why the child hasn’t been charged. Ask if there have been other incidents why hasn’t it been handled previously? What are her parents doing about this; are the defiant and dismissive or fretting g about their evil ass spawn?

Folks here have asked how you would feel if the next time she hurts another kid. Your kid is that kid because the school and the previous parents did nothing. Seems to me the school and district has liability to you and should be named in a lawsuit. Are they screening this kid because she is the seed of the local mafia Don or MS13 capo?

I believe that charges should be filed immediately. If nothing else it will force the parents to face facts. The girl will not see a trial or go into the system unless she is a serial stair pusher. Hopefully she is moved to a different school, she and parents have to go to counseling, and they have to pay restitution.

My one incident with mine was when he was in sixth grade. Wife called and said our son got in a fight; you go handle it. My son was the youngest in his class and small but he was always scrappy. Got to school and my kid is sitting calmly in the principals office. Across the room is a black kid that is six feet tall and big, with a black eye, and blood caked nose, and teary eyes.

Principal calls me in. Says our policy requires both be suspended for three days. The big kid out there is two years older than your son and outweighs him by 100 pounds. “Your kid beat the living shit out of him; it’s something I’ve been hoping for someone to stand up to that shithead. He’s a terrible bully and will be a problem if no one fixes him. Hopefully your son has taught him the lesson we can’t. In the old days I would have given your kid a media.”

After getting the story my son did the right thing. Dude was picking on his friend, my son stepped in to help and took a punch, then went on him like he was Scott Farkus. The thing is the bully quit, and became friends with my son. He graduated high school and went to college.

Lesson: some kids respond to simple rules, others need a kick in the nuts to get back inside the guardrails. Now is the time to jerk her into the seriousness of the situation. Maybe she gets straight, might not, but you have to take action and file charges.

And that bully's name....Albert Einstein.

[Baboontyme 2815]

2 minutes ago, Grade of D as in David said:

I have been saying for years that we should ship all 12 year olds to an island and just let the ones that survive to 15 reenter society.

They have this. It's called Pleasure Island and the kids can guzzle beer there, play pool and smoke cigars. 

[Texzilla58 4741]

 Middle School is “Lord of the Flies”

There’s a lot to be said for having non coed middle schools, keeping the separate while they go through puberty. It would still be a kids version of Oz. As in the prison show.

I really can’t fathom why the school principal won’t do their job and have charged. I’d like to hear the why on that one. They have video. All they need. That girl needs some help as she’s likely a psychopath, meaning she’ll either be on a stripper pole or running for the Senate.

[Cornpop 230]

39 minutes ago, TexasEd said:

That’s how you get Jan 6 and domestic terrorism.  People who never grew out of adolescence levels of logic and self control.

Cloakroom, asshole

[chainsaw 9873]

1 hour ago, Cornpop said:

Cloakroom, asshole

Is domestic terror really political? 

[NorthLoop 14219]

2 hours ago, Cornpop said:

Cloakroom, asshole

Cry more bitch

[Larry T. Spider 1747]

There is some important information missing. Was the “security guard” mentioned in the OP a school resource officer or other type of ISD police? A SRO is a commissioned peace officer and can arrest the student, file charges, etc. A security guard can’t.

The principal can’t press charges, so I don’t know why people keep wanting that. The principal can have the situation  investigated by an SRO. Giving the parents the option is pretty standard because some parents don’t want their kid interviewed by a cop or potentially to have to testify in court with the aggressor present. I have had MANY parents that only want their child dealing with school administrators for the school related consequences and do not want them talking to cops. If you press charges that will 100% happen.

[TwiceHorn 31515]

23 hours ago, Herbie Hancock said:

I don’t know if this has already been addressed because I haven’t finished reading this thread, but this is not his concern. I was convicted of a 3rd degree felony at age 16. I straightened up, followed all terms set forth for which I was to abide, and on my 18th birthday my dad told me I owed him $650 to pay a lawyer to expunge and seal my juvenile record. As it stands now I’m still a cretin (hitby holla!), but I’ve got a folder in my man cave office with 19 lifesaving award certificates. There are 19 people walking and talking this earth because of things I did or participated in that had I not been involved would otherwise be 6 feet underground. I’m not saying all of this to toot my own horn, but rather to be the example that holding someone accountable for their actions doesn’t mean you’ve ruined their life.

And that's exactly why we have a juvenile justice system.  Not all or even many of the cases have a good outcome, but we absolutely must supply the chance.

[TwiceHorn 31515]

4 hours ago, TexasEd said:

 Middle School is “Lord of the Flies”

It really is.  Sucks to your assmar, Piggy.

[Beau Vine 54327]

19 hours ago, TexasEd said:

Bolded.  Why are they putting it on you to press charges?  They need cover or something?  This was a crime they have irrefutable evidence of, they should be filing charges unless you beg them not to.

 

This.  They have video of this, which they won't show you, yet they're sitting on their asses and asking you if want to file charges?

Fuck that douche.  

[Beau Vine 54327]

6 hours ago, Texzilla58 said:

There’s a lot to be said for having non coed middle schools, keeping the separate while they go through puberty.

My wife taught 6th grade at a girls-only private school one year.  Removing boys does not make girls nicer through puberty.  Wife didn't even make it through the full year because every day when I'd pick her up after work, she'd be crying and would cry all the way home.  

[TwiceHorn 31515]

2 hours ago, Beau Vine said:

My wife taught 6th grade at a girls-only private school one year.  Removing boys does not make girls nicer through puberty.  Wife didn't even make it through the full year because every day when I'd pick her up after work, she'd be crying and would cry all the way home.  

I don't think anyone would contend that it would completely eliminate the Lord of the Flies behavior, and I suspect you're right that the girls school would be worse than the boys.  But the mixture is especially toxic.

[LW Goatman 1124]

15 hours ago, Larry T. Spider said:

There is some important information missing. Was the “security guard” mentioned in the OP a school resource officer or other type of ISD police? A SRO is a commissioned peace officer and can arrest the student, file charges, etc. A security guard can’t.

The principal can’t press charges, so I don’t know why people keep wanting that. The principal can have the situation  investigated by an SRO. Giving the parents the option is pretty standard because some parents don’t want their kid interviewed by a cop or potentially to have to testify in court with the aggressor present. I have had MANY parents that only want their child dealing with school administrators for the school related consequences and do not want them talking to cops. If you press charges that will 100% happen.

"Pressing charges" is some sort of tv fiction. Victims of crimes don't press charges in Texas. Criminal charges are between the offender and the state of TX. The principal has an obligation to report to a law enforcement officer per their own policy, if one was not involved here. The law enforcement officer, with probable cause, is obligated to turn the case over to the DAs office who chooses to file a criminal complaint.

I understand the desire for some victims of crimes to not want to prosecute, but those conversations should happen once the case hits the DA's office, not some decision made at a school admin level. It can also create some pretty significant exposure for the school if they don't report the crime, particularly if its contrary to their written policy.

[Quagmire 2147]

Was she hot?

[sidis 9832]

so did this girl's dad get buttfucked with her mom's headless corpse on the lawn yet?

[Baboontyme 2815]

@Hmbre97 any updates? I've thought about this situation a few times with school starting last week and having a 7th grader of my own. Hope it all worked out. 

[RDCanecutter 26458]

23 minutes ago, Baboontyme said:

@Hmbre97 any updates? I've thought about this situation a few times with school starting last week and having a 7th grader of my own. Hope it all worked out. 

Hmbre97 went to talk to the girl and she threw him down the steps.