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Fuck Cancer...One more Time.

SHOOTER12

By SHOOTER12
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SHOOTER12

SHOOTER12 8810

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I've been sitting on this for over a week, and I'm ashamed to to say I'm about to lose my mind. We found out that our youngest daughter daughter has breast cancer.  She was experiencing pain in her left breast and got it checked out, invasive ductal carcinoma.  Checked the right today via MRI, same thing.  Why the fuck didn't they check both to start with?  I just don't understand and hate the whole fucking world right now.  PLEASE, if you're so inclined,  lift her up in your prayers, if not, please send positive hopes and thoughts..

God Bless You All. and thank you. 

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YGIFS

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Saying a prayer right now.  I’m quite sure you’re on top of medical care planning.  Hoping for the best.  If I can help connect you with anyone at Saint David’s, Ascension seton, or MD Anderson… please reach out confidentially.  God bless

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Sbbruin

Sbbruin 21853

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20 minutes ago, SHOOTER12 said:

I've been sitting on this for over a week, and I'm ashamed to to say I'm about to lose my mind. We found out that our youngest daughter daughter has breast cancer.  She was experiencing pain in her left breast and got it checked out, invasive ductal carcinoma.  Checked the right today via MRI, same thing.  Why the fuck didn't they check both to start with?  I just don't understand and hate the whole fucking world right now.  PLEASE, if you're so inclined,  lift her up in your prayers, if not, please send positive hopes and thoughts..

God Bless You All. and thank you. 

Shooter, if there’s one thing I’ve learned in my fight, it’s that we’ve got cancer on the ropes.  She can beat this.  The fight is a bitch, but she can, nay, WILL, get through this.  The early days are the hardest psychologically.  You can’t help going into the darkest places.  Don’t give in to that shit.  Tell her to buckle up, dig in, and kick its ass.  She’s got this.  I know it.  Love and prayers, brother.

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SHOOTER12

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25 minutes ago, Sbbruin said:

Shooter, if there’s one thing I’ve learned in my fight, it’s that we’ve got cancer on the ropes.  She can beat this.  The fight is a bitch, but she can, nay, WILL, get through this.  The early days are the hardest psychologically.  You can’t help going into the darkest places.  Don’t give in to that shit.  Tell her to buckle up, dig in, and kick its ass.  She’s got this.  I know it.  Love and prayers, brother.

The psychology and darkest places are what's killing me. I cannot.get a.grip.on.this.

I haven't slept for days, I'm drinking to try to sleep, way beyond what is healthy,  trying to hide my fears from my wife and cannot quit crying.  The one time in my life I really need to be strong, and I'm a quivering crying pussy, I hate it.

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Grade of D as in David

Grade of D as in David 13253

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1 minute ago, SHOOTER12 said:

The psychology and darkest places are what's killing me. I cannot.get a.grip.on.this.

I haven't slept for days, I'm drinking to try to sleep, way beyond what is healthy,  trying to hide my fears from my wife and cannot quit crying.  The one time in my life I really need to be strong, and I'm a quivering crying pussy, I hate it.

First of all you're not a quivering, crying, pussy. You're a concerned and loving father and husband. Shit, I'd think something was wrong with you if you weren't having trouble sleeping, and weren't devastated by the news.

 

Next you need to realize this isn't something you can get a grip on. You need to trust the doctors, they're going to give your daughter the best care on the planet. Then you need to trust in your daughter that she is going to fight and kick cancer in the fucking ass.

 

I know we're all a bunch of assholes but we're here for you if you need us too.

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TrashMaster G

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Fuck cancer, indeed.

Cancer killed my Dad a little over three years ago. About two months after he died, my Mom was diagnosed. They found it purely by accident.  It was aggressive and if it had not been found when it was, she would have been dead in a matter of months.

Three years later and she is doing great.  Not in remission, but it's under control and she is living her life.

Treatments these days are light years ahead of what they used to be.  Your job is to be there for your girl and convince her this is a fight she is going to win.

Peace to you, brother.

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SHOOTER12

SHOOTER12 8810

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46 minutes ago, Grade of D as in David said:

First of all you're not a quivering, crying, pussy. You're a concerned and loving father and husband. Shit, I'd think something was wrong with you if you weren't having trouble sleeping, and weren't devastated by the news.

 

Next you need to realize this isn't something you can get a grip on. You need to trust the doctors, they're going to give your daughter the best care on the planet. Then you need to trust in your daughter that she is going to fight and kick cancer in the fucking ass.

 

I know we're all a bunch of assholes but we're here for you if you need us too.

Got damn, I love you guys  

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Kennythetiger

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Don’t drink, man. Your body might sleep but your brain stays up late processing all of that alcohol. Like you said, it’s hard enough to sleep without giving your brain something to play with every night. 
If you can get the hoe handle back out of your wife’s ass, maybe take her and your dog for a long walk in the evenings…?  
Will be thinking of you and your family. Every day. 

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Hate

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5 hours ago, SHOOTER12 said:

Got damn, I love you guys  

You forgot the /no homo.   Will be sending positive thoughts your way Shooter.  A very good friend of mine had a kidney removed because of cancer a couple of years ago.  He was on what would have been his final checkup before being given the all clear, but they found a tumor on his pancreas.  I don't know what his prognosis is just yet, but cancer does indeed suck. 

 

3 minutes ago, Kennythetiger said:

Don’t drink, man. Your body might sleep but your brain stays up late processing all of that alcohol. Like you said, it’s hard enough to sleep without giving your brain something to play with every night. 
If you can get the hoe handle back out of your wife’s ass, maybe take her and your dog for a long walk in the evenings…?  
Will be thinking of you and your family. Every day. 

Wait, is this true? 

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Scheiss Meister

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Praying for your daughter and your family, Shooter.  It's hard when something is hurting our kids and Daddy can't fix it.  What you can do is support her and be there for her.  The advances in cancer treatment are about a nanometer short of miraculous, and the whole catalog is fixing to bet thrown at the evil attacking your daughter.  Be there and help her through the rough days, and y'all got this.

And I second the suggestion that you need to moderate the drinking, if not cut off completely for a while.  It doesn't really help much, and your family doesn't need another problem to deal with.  My 2 cents.

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dcbc

dcbc 14484

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Keep your chin up, @SHOOTER12.  Your reaction is perfectly understandable.  But she will kick its ass and you'll have many great years with her to come.  I went through this with my wife eight years ago.  Same thing (pain) prompted us to get her checked out a little ahead of her usual yearly mammogram schedule.  There usually isn't pain.  So consider that a good thing, which hopefully led to earlier detection.  They'll do some more diagnostic (biopsy), and get her team together to come up with a plan.  From there, things will move quick and there will be plenty for you to do to support her.  We (Surly) will be here for you. 

 

Again, I've been through this with my wife.  Invasive ductal carcinoma is what 80% of women who get breast cancer have.  So in all likelihood, it is very treatable.  What's to come largely depends on what sort of hormone receptors are involved.  Treatment is no picnic to say the least, but I imagine they have made great strides since even a few years ago.  If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to reach out.  I still remember it all like it was yesterday.

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YGIFS

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Thought about you and your girl this morning Shooter when I was on a walk with my youngest before school.  I'll quit mentioning it after this but tomorrow I'll be with some folks from MD Anderson...and I can help you cut through the red tape...just PM me your contact info and we'll make it happen.  Obviously they give the same top-notch care to everyone regardless, but it's a monolith over there with lotta overhead.    No doubt you're doing everything you can but happy to help in any small way.  

Remember to laugh.  Remember to breathe.  And remember to laugh until you can't breathe.  

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Zepol87

Zepol87 9186

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Sorry to hear Shooter hoping for the best. 

I thought I had posted this in the other thread but I can't seem to remember or find it  anyway my cousin isn't supposed to make it through the year. Stage 4 metastatic something from the info related from my family. Liver, kidneys and lungs are in bad shape and he is pretty much bed ridden. We haven't been close for sometime but we grew up together then went separate ways after high school. Fucking 35 years old man

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Knoxtnhorn

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10 hours ago, SHOOTER12 said:

I've been sitting on this for over a week, and I'm ashamed to to say I'm about to lose my mind. We found out that our youngest daughter daughter has breast cancer.  She was experiencing pain in her left breast and got it checked out, invasive ductal carcinoma.  Checked the right today via MRI, same thing.  Why the fuck didn't they check both to start with?  I just don't understand and hate the whole fucking world right now.  PLEASE, if you're so inclined,  lift her up in your prayers, if not, please send positive hopes and thoughts..

God Bless You All. and thank you. 

We're here for you brother.  I hope everything works out.

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SHOOTER12

SHOOTER12 8810

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45 minutes ago, YGIFS said:

Thought about you and your girl this morning Shooter when I was on a walk with my youngest before school.  I'll quit mentioning it after this but tomorrow I'll be with some folks from MD Anderson...and I can help you cut through the red tape...just PM me your contact info and we'll make it happen.  Obviously they give the same top-notch care to everyone regardless, but it's a monolith over there with lotta overhead.    No doubt you're doing everything you can but happy to help in any small way.  

Remember to laugh.  Remember to breathe.  And remember to laugh until you can't breathe.  

She currently lives and works in the San Angelo area. Trying to find out who she's seeing no.  Of course, no freaking insurance. 

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nnm

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Praying for your daughter, your family, and you, Shooter. Even in the middle of this horrible situation, you can have joy, peace, and levels of love that you never new existed with you, your wife, and your daughter. Don’t miss those moments. Of sharing your fear, your frustration, your anger, but even more the quiet moments of love, calm, and even joy from just being together. 
 

I’m also praying that you’ll seek rest from sources other than the bottle. Speaking from experience, it’s a false rest, and has made my response to crisis worse. 

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YGIFS

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8 minutes ago, SHOOTER12 said:

She currently lives and works in the San Angelo area. Trying to find out who she's seeing no.  Of course, no freaking insurance. 

If she can make it over to Austin, there's tons of assets here---no offense to San Angelo.  Saint David's or Ascension-Seton.  Can't speak to the financial piece but if you want to talk to their highest-up on money and connect with best care and cut through the red tape---let me know.  Happy to help in any way.  

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TexArcher

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Very sorry to hear this.

Your reaction is completely normal.  

But, to echo others, and speaking as an alcoholic with 9+ year of sobriety, try to stop self-medicating with alcohol as soon as you can.  There are people in AA rooms who once had the ability to moderate and lost it.  I don't want to hammer this too hard, and again, it's a normal response to immense stress, but be very careful.  

Have you looked into cancer support groups?  That might be the most immediate help you can get to deal with this.  Like it could probably happen tonight.

I wish I had more to offer.  Hang in there, go easy on yourself, and peace to you and your family.

 

 

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Sbbruin

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10 hours ago, SHOOTER12 said:

The psychology and darkest places are what's killing me. I cannot.get a.grip.on.this.

I haven't slept for days, I'm drinking to try to sleep, way beyond what is healthy,  trying to hide my fears from my wife and cannot quit crying.  The one time in my life I really need to be strong, and I'm a quivering crying pussy, I hate it.

You HAVE to embrace the belief that she will beat this.  Because she will.  Cancer is the enemy.  And the enemy is not coming into my house and beating me.  And it won’t beat her.  But you have to believe that.

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Richard Kimball

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16 hours ago, SHOOTER12 said:

The psychology and darkest places are what's killing me. I cannot.get a.grip.on.this.

I haven't slept for days, I'm drinking to try to sleep, way beyond what is healthy,  trying to hide my fears from my wife and cannot quit crying.  The one time in my life I really need to be strong, and I'm a quivering crying pussy, I hate it.

I've been almost exactly where you were. Not cancer, but different condition with one of my daughters. She's okay now, and I get asked to do counseling sometimes for people going through similar situations. 

One of the questions I got asked some was, "how were you so strong?" I wasn't strong. I asked God to kill me and heal her. I laid on the floor and cried, begging him to kill me and make her healthy. There wasn't a door that said, "give up." What? Kill myself? The rest of my family needed me, too. The ONLY option I had was to move on and keep praying, even without hope, and help my family the best I could. 

Praying for you, and seriously, remember, your wife and the rest of your family also need you. 

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SHOOTER12

SHOOTER12 8810

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12 minutes ago, Richard Kimball said:

I've been almost exactly where you were. Not cancer, but different condition with one of my daughters. She's okay now, and I get asked to do counseling sometimes for people going through similar situations. 

One of the questions I got asked some was, "how were you so strong?" I wasn't strong. I asked God to kill me and heal her. I laid on the floor and cried, begging him to kill me and make her healthy. There wasn't a door that said, "give up." What? Kill myself? The rest of my family needed me, too. The ONLY option I had was to move on and keep praying, even without hope, and help my family the best I could. 

Praying for you, and seriously, remember, your wife and the rest of your family also need you. 

I've done the bolded part several times myself unfortunately. Getting better though...I think

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