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Wulaw Horn

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45 Texas
19 OU

289 prop

2005, Jack Straw and I are wandering in after driving up that moring. It’s cold and I end up buying 2xl super white sweat pants at the Walgreens on the way from our parking spot to the Fair.

At a crosswalk, a Texas fan muses, “huh, I totally forgot my giant pair of sweatpants.” With said giant pair of sweatpants on, we encounter a 20-something ex-frat boy in full regalia asking a very cute OU co-ed, “are you ready? For the full anal rape-age that’s about to happen?”

The sun comes out and I ditch the pants at the porta-johns near the best beer stand in the Fair and we kick the shit out of OU.

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TEXAS 38

blowU 24

Bijan & Worthy? Gotta go Tree fiddy

Don't have a lot of stories but in 2019, Mrs BGH and I meet up (of course by Big Tex) early with my sister, BIL, and their daughter (ALL 3 UT grads). We grab a couple of corn dogs and my BIL and I take turns standing in the beer line and are pretty much putting away quite a few before 9am. I start laughing and my BIL says "what's up".... I just told him I am going to fuck some dirt burglars. Group of about 10-15 Sooner sorority girls are trying to take selfies with Big Tex in the background. I walk over to em in my UT gear and ball cap and tell 'em, here I'll take your pictures. They look at me like WTF but a couple hand over their phones. I take a few steps back to get them in frame, flash them the HORNS UP, say Hook Em!  and tell them to smile as I snap off 3-4 with each phone..... Walk over, give them their phones back and they proceed to yell "You Asshole" !!! as I had switched the camera view to myself and they had plenty of pics of a laughing 50 something Hornfan on their phone...Being young, They easily shitcanned mine and got a blowU fan to then take more. 

Best was as I continued to get unsuspecting sooners with my ruse was my BIL thinking that I was going to get him into a fight BEFORE the game even started. The last couple I got were in at least their late 70's or early 80's (being from OK , meant they were probably 30), they proudly stood in front of Big Tex, flashed the Horns down and when I gave them their phone back, the old man's face turned as crimson as his jacket. He glared at us as we laughed, looked back at his phone, glared again, and did this about 3-4 times as we could tell he didn't know how to trash the pictures of my handsome smiling self in my UT baseball cap. Last we saw of them, him and his wife seemed to be almost arguing and looking for help from someone to delete the pics. 😛🤘

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UT.           41

blOU.        24

 

I sat on the top row of the lower deck in 1990.  The land thieves led for most of the second half 13-7, threatening to score again on multiple occasions.  A couple of street urchins who had probably snuck in were standing behind us on the concourse, one of them yelling “I can see it now - 20 to 7”.  Gardere threw a late TD to put us up 14-13.  When sooner RD Lasher choked on a last second FG, I held my glasses out to the punk and said “you need these buddy, I don’t see any 20-7”.  😁

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Texas- 63

OU- 28

Worthy + Bijan- 300 combined yards.

One year, maybe 2005, I went out to the Cotton Bowl in hopes of getting a ticket.  Perhaps I was at the wrong gate but I was out there 90 minutes before kick and never saw a single ticket for sale.  I retreated back to my car to leave and find a place to go watch the game.  As I enter the parking isle and begin walking to my car I see two guys, late highschool or early college, wearing 0U jerseys going up and down the isle.  They are stopping at cars that have the flags that you place on the top of the window and roll up.  They take each one that is a Texas Longhorn flag and put them in a large pile in the middle of the isle.  Then one of the guys produces a container of charcoal lighter fluid.  He pours the fluid on the pile of flags and sets it on fire.  They take off as soon as the fire is good and lit.  After a few minutes a police car comes by followed by a firetruck.

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Texas 41

Meth heads 17

Yards 288 Bijan breaks a long one

It was one of the Colt years, 2009. Was staying at a friend's house in Dallas with friends. Woke up at 630 to start drinking. I made a pitcher of yeah baby shots which we finished before we left and brought another one and a bunch of beers for the cab ride to the fair. We are all pretty drunk, so we decided to eat some corn dogs, drink beer, and ride rides to try and sober up.

We get in the game and when the Sooners run out I boo them loudly and flip double birds in their direction.  A lady behind us probably 10 years older than my group says I am ruining her game day experience. I'm a little taken a back and worried that there might be children nearby. There weren't so I told her fuck your game day experience, this is hate day.

Our first two plays were screens (Greg Davis is not our standard). We ran it again on third down and I lost it and spiked my nearly full bottle of diet coke and it hits the ground and then erupts like a mentos volcano. It somehow managed to avoid almost everyone plus everyone was so pissed at our three and out that no one really seemed to notice.

About 3 series later I'm parched and I'm going to go on a run for more drinks but one of my buddies realizes he has beers in his cargo shorts from the cab ride over. He pulls them out, holds them up like Simba and we chug them. 

We ended up winning and spent the rest of the day slamming corn dogs and beers and I made it a point to yell Suuuuuun Boooooowl at every sooner at the fair after the game.

I hope to repeat that this year.

 

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Texas 38

ou 17

212 yards

RoJo gonna go off in this one.

Haven't been in about 9 years but I rode in a DART train with 75 ou fans and me any my 6 year old daughter the only orange in sight.  Good thing they kept their mouths shut because we were ready to bring the smoke - 2 on 75.

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On 10/3/2022 at 5:08 PM, TexArcher said:

ou - 0

Texas - 84

 

Combined yards for Worthy and Bijan: as many as they god damned want.

 

On 10/4/2022 at 2:51 PM, Hornlover said:

 

Texas - 196

OU - 0

Bijan & Worthy : 228 yards

Fuck those mouth breathing, sister fucking, meth smoking, cock munching, douche nozzle sucking, dickbag hoarding, land thieving, teeth missing, sad clown-paint wearing, inbred fucking morons. Fuck all of them and their shitty school, their stupid redundant song, their retarded fans, and their classless, dickless, can't-take-a-loss pussy fucking football team.

@TexArcher and I were the only two people to predict the shutout

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On 10/2/2022 at 9:47 PM, gmr548 said:

I've been waiting to make predictions in this thread in recent weeks in order to see what the Ewers situation looks like at the end of the week. I have different but roughly equal concerns about either QB though. With Ewers, whether or not he's 100% healthy, and whether he'll take care of the ball. With Card, whether he's going to choke up in the atmosphere of the RRS and whether the OU defense can find some footing knowing Texas can't throw deep or impose its will at the LOS to run the ball.

OU is reeling. They may or may not have their starting QB, and even if they do, he is not a Baker Mayfield/Kyler Murray/Jalen Hurts/Caleb Williams type. Their defense has been mercilessly shredded in conference play. Their offense is good, but not at the special level Riley had it where it could make up for that.

Texas is better than it was last year, when it should have won. The defense is solid against the run and is at least not abjectly terrible against the pass when we're not conceding 7 yard completions with PK's call. Texas has enough talent catching passes and has been good enough in pass protection to abuse the OU secondary regardless of who is playing QB. The RBs are pretty good, you might have heard. There is potential for Texas to win this game, and win it big. Like set a new margin of victory record (33 points, if I recall) big. I can see the path to that.

That said, the utter lack of closing ability has been this program's number one issue under Sark. It's more likely than not that this game will be hotly contested because that's just how it goes in the Cotton Bowl; but even if it's not, Sark is astoundingly under .500 with a two-score second half lead in conference play at Texas. OU is nothing special and has all kinds of negative momentum. I would love to see Texas jump out ahead, OU to read the writing on the wall and quit, and Texas proceed to humiliate them and effectively end their season. But at this point, I need to see it to believe that Texas can win a game like this under Sark, because the thing Texas has been best at under him is finding ways to lose games they should win, especially outside of DKR. At the end of the day, I do not trust Sark & staff to get it done.

OU: 34

Texas: 31

Robinson/Worthy Yardage: 214

The bolded is why I only get this .gif:

will ferrell laughing GIF

Instead of this one:

Billy Madison Shut Up GIF

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On 9/24/2022 at 11:07 PM, ztejas said:

Get Ewers in that bitch and let's go win 10.

 

On 10/2/2022 at 8:45 AM, CoachTex said:

Texas - 47

OU - 21

Worthy and Bijan combine for 385

1994 Texas OU game. Oldest brother was in his final year at Texas and scored us tickets. I was still a 17 year old in high school. I got to go for free but was designated driver for the weekend for him and 2 of his buddies.  Spend the night at his buddies parents house Friday night in Dallas. Saturday watch Texas beat OU on stonie Clark and Robert Reed's play in the North end of the field.  It was glorious.  Now the good part. After the game we go to midevil inn. Brother and buddies proceeded to pound yards of beer. We get kicked out because my brother tries to reenactment his best pirate using the yard glasses as a sword standing on top of tables challenging people to duels. He even took his shirt off and tied it around his head. They agree not to call the cops if I got him out of there.  Buddy says we are too drunk to go back to his parents house. I proceede to drive their 3 drunk asses all they way back to Austin.  We hit Waxahachie and I hear the sounds of explosive vomiting from the back of the car.  Side note, I am driving my Moms accord. Turns out my brother caused his buddy to puke by asking him if he wanted a nice greasy pork sandwich served in a dirty Ashtray.  In closing I cleaned up my mom's car on the side of I-35 at 11 at night while my brother's buddy continues to puke his guts out in the grass and my brother is laughing his ass off.  We won and trip was still worth it. 

 

 

On 10/2/2022 at 8:29 PM, T-dog said:

Texas 49

Cock gobblers 17

 

Bijan + X combine for 343 yards

Hook‘em

 

On 10/3/2022 at 10:29 AM, WithoutAClue said:

TX 49

OU SUCKS 21

Bijan/X 288

 

On 10/3/2022 at 10:32 AM, Xcalibur said:

Texas 62

OU 13

Bijan/Worthy yards 267

This game is going to get ugly for OU.  We're going to have our way with them and let out a past decade's worth of pent-up anger and aggression.  This will be Texas Football's coming out party for this season and beyond.  It will set the tone for what's to come the rest of this year and in the next several seasons.  Remember this fucking game.  It will be viewed by Texas Football historians as the turning point of a program.  And the palpable decline of another.

Get ready to fuck.  

 

Edited by Wulaw Horn
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XCaliber with the post of the week.  

Nobody was particularly close on the score.  How does it usually get awarded?  Every other week was obvious.  I'm inclined to pick the closest to zero from all the OU totals for Texas guys that had 49, but I think that's still 17 points off (like 49-17 was closest).  
My score prediction was 55-10 and I was only 16 points off, as a for example- how do yall normally determine the tie?  

Or, since nobody was close should I just pick my two favorite ones (the two having OU held scoreless) and roll like that?   What say you Surly?

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5 minutes ago, Wulaw Horn said:

XCaliber with the post of the week.  

Nobody was particularly close on the score.  How does it usually get awarded?  Every other week was obvious.  I'm inclined to pick the closest to zero from all the OU totals for Texas guys that had 49, but I think that's still 17 points off (like 49-17 was closest).  
My score prediction was 55-10 and I was only 16 points off, as a for example- how do yall normally determine the tie?  

Or, since nobody was close should I just pick my two favorite ones (the two having OU held scoreless) and roll like that?   What say you Surly?

Point margin of victory gets my vote.  In my case, I had the score at exactly a 49 point margin of victory for Texas along with post of the week.

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5 minutes ago, Wulaw Horn said:

XCaliber with the post of the week.  

Nobody was particularly close on the score.  How does it usually get awarded?  Every other week was obvious.  I'm inclined to pick the closest to zero from all the OU totals for Texas guys that had 49, but I think that's still 17 points off (like 49-17 was closest).  
My score prediction was 55-10 and I was only 16 points off, as a for example- how do yall normally determine the tie?  

Or, since nobody was close should I just pick my two favorite ones (the two having OU held scoreless) and roll like that?   What say you Surly?

@Huckleberry

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1 hour ago, Wulaw Horn said:

XCaliber with the post of the week.  

Nobody was particularly close on the score.  How does it usually get awarded?  Every other week was obvious.  I'm inclined to pick the closest to zero from all the OU totals for Texas guys that had 49, but I think that's still 17 points off (like 49-17 was closest).  
My score prediction was 55-10 and I was only 16 points off, as a for example- how do yall normally determine the tie?  

Or, since nobody was close should I just pick my two favorite ones (the two having OU held scoreless) and roll like that?   What say you Surly?

Winner should have Texas 49 and OU lowest score 

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1 hour ago, Wulaw Horn said:

XCaliber with the post of the week.  

Nobody was particularly close on the score.  How does it usually get awarded?  Every other week was obvious.  I'm inclined to pick the closest to zero from all the OU totals for Texas guys that had 49, but I think that's still 17 points off (like 49-17 was closest).  
My score prediction was 55-10 and I was only 16 points off, as a for example- how do yall normally determine the tie?  

Or, since nobody was close should I just pick my two favorite ones (the two having OU held scoreless) and roll like that?   What say you Surly?

The way I did it was start with 200 for a perfect prediction. Subtract 2 points for every point you missed the margin (and another 20 if you picked the wrong winner). Subtract one point for every point you missed the total. 

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18 hours ago, Huckleberry said:

The way I did it was start with 200 for a perfect prediction. Subtract 2 points for every point you missed the margin (and another 20 if you picked the wrong winner). Subtract one point for every point you missed the total. 

I picked this way and then totaled it up (I swear I did this first) and found out that the winner was.... ME!!!!!!!

Actually I tied with 2 other people.  @joeycovers and @runthebone  Congrats to yall, you each win 25.  

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