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Official 2022 Bitch about Family - Holiday Insanity

tx 3 putt

By tx 3 putt
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Armybrat
Armybrat

Took Mrs. Brat to church and will pick her up in an hour, so I’m sitting here alone looking at my late grandson’s stocking hanging on the mantel. First Christmas without him in 30 years. Our midd

UncleSonny
UncleSonny

Not really lulz or bitching exactly, but today was a son of a bitch. Got in to Tyler with the family and went straight to the hospital where my 90 year old grandfather has been for the last week with

GoPokes83
GoPokes83

Went to get our Christmas stuff out of the barn and noticed there were 3 new in box 10’ trees in there. Turns out my wife was super proud she bought them on clearance last year because they were so c

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MissingInAction

MissingInAction 25,011

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Could be fireworks Saturday as I've been invited to a party with my old yard bar crew. 

There may be a bat shit female in attendance who is convinced I'm in love with her because I may have told her that while shit housed hammered.

Tried to explain 1. I have no memory of saying that. 2. I tell everyone that when I'm pickled. I'm a happy drunk unless whiskey or longhorn football is involved.

I wouldn't bother going but the host is doing a low country boil I won't be missing.

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Sbbruin

Sbbruin 21,829

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5 minutes ago, MissingInAction said:

Could be fireworks Saturday as I've been invited to a party with my old yard bar crew. 

There may be a bat shit female in attendance who is convinced I'm in love with her because I may have told her that while shit housed hammered.

Tried to explain 1. I have no memory of saying that. 2. I tell everyone that when I'm pickled. I'm a happy drunk unless whiskey or longhorn football is involved.

I wouldn't bother going but the host is doing a low country boil I won't be missing.

Oh what a tangled web we weave when first we get shithoused.

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Kennythetiger

Kennythetiger 9,375

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13 minutes ago, MissingInAction said:

Could be fireworks Saturday as I've been invited to a party with my old yard bar crew. 

There may be a bat shit female in attendance who is convinced I'm in love with her because I may have told her that while shit housed hammered.

Tried to explain 1. I have no memory of saying that. 2. I tell everyone that when I'm pickled. I'm a happy drunk unless whiskey or longhorn football is involved.

I wouldn't bother going but the host is doing a low country boil I won't be missing.

In vino veritas. 

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TrashMaster G

TrashMaster G 17,546

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24 minutes ago, MissingInAction said:

Could be fireworks Saturday as I've been invited to a party with my old yard bar crew. 

There may be a bat shit female in attendance who is convinced I'm in love with her because I may have told her that while shit housed hammered.

Tried to explain 1. I have no memory of saying that. 2. I tell everyone that when I'm pickled. I'm a happy drunk unless whiskey or longhorn football is involved.

I wouldn't bother going but the host is doing a low country boil I won't be missing.

Which family member did you say this to?

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tx 3 putt

tx 3 putt 76,870

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25 minutes ago, MissingInAction said:

Could be fireworks Saturday as I've been invited to a party with my old yard bar crew. 

There may be a bat shit female in attendance who is convinced I'm in love with her because I may have told her that while shit housed hammered.

Tried to explain 1. I have no memory of saying that. 2. I tell everyone that when I'm pickled. I'm a happy drunk unless whiskey or longhorn football is involved.

I wouldn't bother going but the host is doing a low country boil I won't be missing.


Nothing wrong being in love for 15 mins or so 

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Sbbruin

Sbbruin 21,829

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3 hours ago, tx 3 putt said:


Nothing wrong being in love for 15 mins or so 

Plenty of strippers I was sure I could offer a better life to.  Love…was not a big enough word to express how I felt about those sluts.  For 15 mins or so.

 

95AD831C-FDC0-4DF4-AED6-8D3DA7592E8F.jpeg

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Sandman

Sandman 3,403

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I made the mistake of texting my sister to she if she had talked to our dad about our christmas get-together. She lives 1/2 mile from him and sees him more than I do, as I live 20 miles away. This innocent question quickly turned into her sending me longcat texts, letting me know that she (and dad, supposedly) are mad that my adult children see my MIL and their maternal grandparents/extended family more than they see my side, and how she feels like an afterthought to them, blah blah. I resisted the urge to blast her about her own kids' bullshit and said I'd ask my kids and get back to her. 

My daughters are 21 (no pics) and have moved out of my house and have jobs and lives of their own. I cannot control their schedule and don't want to. Now I don't want to go over there at all, I don't want this fucking drama bullshit. 

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YoungCounty

YoungCounty 165

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Doing Christmas at my mom’s house today. My son is running a tad late. My mom popped off about eating without him. My wife is now pissed. 
 

I usually just try to sit in the den by myself all day and avoid everyone. But now my wife is in here bitching to me about my mom. And food isn’t ready anyways and my son will be here before it is. So, all of this didn’t even need to happen. 
 

Going to be a long day. 

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Kennythetiger

Kennythetiger 9,375

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4 minutes ago, YoungCounty said:

Doing Christmas at my mom’s house today. My son is running a tad late. My mom popped off about eating without him. My wife is now pissed. 
 

I usually just try to sit in the den by myself all day and avoid everyone. But now my wife is in here bitching to me about my mom. And food isn’t ready anyways and my son will be here before it is. So, all of this didn’t even need to happen. 
 

Going to be a long day. 

Food’s ready and Junior isn’t- he can make a plate when he gets there. 
Food’s not ready and wife and mom pulling you apart?  That’s god invented whisky. 

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tigol

tigol 2,395

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1 minute ago, SHOOTER12 said:

Makes sense. Not terribly sharp lately. Lot of things going overly head it seems...

Dude.  No worries.  Happy to help.  Some shit went down at a family Christmas party yesterday that I'm still trying to reconcile.  The bottom line is my Aunt is a fall down drunk and on the decline.  She literally fell down and my husband had to pick her ass up, put her on the couch and say "Don't try to get up!"  Spoiler alert:  She got up because she was "out of wine" and promptly fell the fuck back down again.  On the hardwood floor.  Full wine glass in hand.  It's a miracle she hasn't injured herself to the point of calling an ambulance, but I'm sure that is next.  

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Gil Bang

Gil Bang 25,918

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18 minutes ago, tigol said:

Dude.  No worries.  Happy to help.  Some shit went down at a family Christmas party yesterday that I'm still trying to reconcile.  The bottom line is my Aunt is a fall down drunk and on the decline.  She literally fell down and my husband had to pick her ass up, put her on the couch and say "Don't try to get up!"  Spoiler alert:  She got up because she was "out of wine" and promptly fell the fuck back down again.  On the hardwood floor.  Full wine glass in hand.  It's a miracle she hasn't injured herself to the point of calling an ambulance, but I'm sure that is next.  

She's out of wine but has a full wine glass?  

 

Are you sure that you're not the drunk?

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Al Czervik

Al Czervik 1,229

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On 12/13/2022 at 1:06 PM, MissingInAction said:

Could be fireworks Saturday as I've been invited to a party with my old yard bar crew. 

There may be a bat shit female in attendance who is convinced I'm in love with her because I may have told her that while shit housed hammered.

Tried to explain 1. I have no memory of saying that. 2. I tell everyone that when I'm pickled. I'm a happy drunk unless whiskey or longhorn football is involved.

I wouldn't bother going but the host is doing a low country boil I won't be missing.

Username kinda checks out. 

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MissingInAction

MissingInAction 25,011

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Crazy lady didn't show up to the party but there was a shit show nonetheless.

One of the attendees had been drinking all day and showed up to the party around 7 visibly shit housed. Next thing you know he has a bag of shrooms and is trying to hand them out. Everyone politley declines, just not that kinf od party, but instead of putting his offering back in the bag he eats each one.

About an hour goes by and I'm watching the dude. He seems to be hold up well. 

Dinner gets served and while  eating I look over to see him passed out and sliding down the wall. I was like hey yall shroom boy is out cold. Couple guys pop up to ease him to the ground.

I kept eating cause fuck that guy. He's not ruining my crab dinner with his bullshit. 

So people are slapping his face yelling at him. He finally comes around and starts to get up then promptly goes right back down. 

Out of the 12 people there 7 are concerned while the rest of us go about our business. The people who knew him didn't give a fuck because apparently he does this shit all the fucking time and they are sick of it.

After about an hour and a half  he's finally lucid, and one woman starts yelling in his face how he promised not to do this to her again. Then left. Then everyone is like dude, get the fuck out. 

The host called an uber and physically escorted him down to the curb.

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MinerProphet

MinerProphet 71

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1 hour ago, MissingInAction said:

Crazy lady didn't show up to the party but there was a shit show nonetheless.

One of the attendees had been drinking all day and showed up to the party around 7 visibly shit housed. Next thing you know he has a bag of shrooms and is trying to hand them out. Everyone politley declines, just not that kinf od party, but instead of putting his offering back in the bag he eats each one.

About an hour goes by and I'm watching the dude. He seems to be hold up well. 

Dinner gets served and while  eating I look over to see him passed out and sliding down the wall. I was like hey yall shroom boy is out cold. Couple guys pop up to ease him to the ground.

I kept eating cause fuck that guy. He's not ruining my crab dinner with his bullshit. 

So people are slapping his face yelling at him. He finally comes around and starts to get up then promptly goes right back down. 

Out of the 2 people there 7 are concerned while the rest of us go about our business. The people who knew him didn't give a fuck because apparently he does this shit all the fucking time and they are sick of it.

After about an hour and a half  he's finally lucid, and one woman starts yelling in his face how he promised not to do this to her again. Then left. Then everyone is like dude, get the fuck out. 

The host called an uber and physically escorted him down to the curb.

Sorry for partying. Y'all didn't have to hit me in the face though.

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High Plains Drifter

High Plains Drifter 11,029

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3 hours ago, MissingInAction said:

Crazy lady didn't show up to the party but there was a shit show nonetheless.

One of the attendees had been drinking all day and showed up to the party around 7 visibly shit housed. Next thing you know he has a bag of shrooms and is trying to hand them out. Everyone politley declines, just not that kinf od party, but instead of putting his offering back in the bag he eats each one.

About an hour goes by and I'm watching the dude. He seems to be hold up well. 

Dinner gets served and while  eating I look over to see him passed out and sliding down the wall. I was like hey yall shroom boy is out cold. Couple guys pop up to ease him to the ground.

I kept eating cause fuck that guy. He's not ruining my crab dinner with his bullshit. 

So people are slapping his face yelling at him. He finally comes around and starts to get up then promptly goes right back down. 

Out of the 12 people there 7 are concerned while the rest of us go about our business. The people who knew him didn't give a fuck because apparently he does this shit all the fucking time and they are sick of it.

After about an hour and a half  he's finally lucid, and one woman starts yelling in his face how he promised not to do this to her again. Then left. Then everyone is like dude, get the fuck out. 

The host called an uber and physically escorted him down to the curb.

 

can you dm me the guy's number?

 

 

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Sandman

Sandman 3,403

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On 12/16/2022 at 6:25 PM, Sandman said:

I made the mistake of texting my sister to she if she had talked to our dad about our christmas get-together. She lives 1/2 mile from him and sees him more than I do, as I live 20 miles away. This innocent question quickly turned into her sending me longcat texts, letting me know that she (and dad, supposedly) are mad that my adult children see my MIL and their maternal grandparents/extended family more than they see my side, and how she feels like an afterthought to them, blah blah. I resisted the urge to blast her about her own kids' bullshit and said I'd ask my kids and get back to her. 

My daughters are 21 (no pics) and have moved out of my house and have jobs and lives of their own. I cannot control their schedule and don't want to. Now I don't want to go over there at all, I don't want this fucking drama bullshit. 

Yesterday, I received an even longer longcat text, apologizing for her earlier outburst and explaining how she feels like she needs to go to therapy. I just said "ok" and left it at that. We're all meeting for dinner after Christmas, hopefully it'll be drama-free but not gonna hold my breath.

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HouTex

HouTex 1,866

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2 hours ago, FirstTimeCaller said:

No CR, but the Fox News + Older folks paradigm is very, very real. Woof. Turn it off for a weekend.

It’s the other side that’s problematic in our family.  We have a leftist BSC niece that makes everything about politics.  She can single handedly ruin Christmas.  

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GhostofDanJones

GhostofDanJones 336

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Pray for me...

Girlfriend's family always does a huge Christmas party on Christmas Eve at their place and invite a lot of their friends and my family too, which is great, but now I'm told that apparently their party will now be at my house. She sprung this up on me last night. So now instead of cooking one thing and bringing it over for a potluck like we do every year I'm now in charge of grilling everything(GFs father and brother have volunteered to help me to take some of the pressure off) and cooking almost all the sides(your standard stuffing, casseroles, pies, etc.). When I asked about why it's at our place all of a sudden she said that her family wanted to "try something new" this year. More like try my patience. I've put my foot down and told my future MIL that they need to cook 75% of the side dishes since I literally do not have time. I've told them multiple times that I'll be in the office most of that day on Christmas Eve getting some last minute work done since we'll be closed that next week and I'll be on vacation until January 3rd. 

If it's your party, go all out and invite me and others, but don't fucking volunteer us to host at the last god damn minute! Going to be knocking back egg nog with Jack Daniels to get ready for this disaster. Oh yeah, they haven't given me a guest list or head count either yet. 

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