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Required Reading for any Longhorn ×

The "Soldier" is a bit rapey

Gil Bang

By Gil Bang
in Football

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Beau Vine

Beau Vine 54466

Posted
Posted
5 hours ago, Lhorn said:

Damn, she fine!  But I can see the appeal of withered old granny tail too. 

 

5 hours ago, Jkwellborn said:

Gummies!!! Ftw

Delivering pizza on a Saturday night
I was cranking Van Halen and looking tight
Ten extra sausage went to Shady Oak Drive
I'm lucky that I left there alive
It's a gangbang
The place was packed with wrinkly boobies and dicks
The youngest one there was maybe 76
The head granny grunted and she pulled out a gun
She said we'll pay you for the pizza when we're done
It's a gangbang
Gangbang at the old folks home
One foot in the grave
Two lips on my bone
Gangbang at the old folks home
The smell of Bengay was kind of making me sick
Till someone spit out some dentures and started gumming my dick
These golden girls had really been round the block
I got a rim job from one while she was knitting some socks
Gangbang at the old folks home
Senile sex slaves are making me groan
Gangbang at the old folks home
I took her doggy and I gave her a spank
That's when I think I dislodged her oxygen tank
She fell to the floor and three seconds later
I was running for the defibrillator
Three silver foxes started licking my ass so
I twisted my nuts to keep from cumming too fast
I had my fist in a butthole til somebody said
That ain't no way to show respect for the dead
Gangbang at the old folks home
I rode a sex train with geriatric nymphos
Gangbang at the old folks home
Old folks home, yeah
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ImissWallyPryor

ImissWallyPryor 9046

Posted
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On 6/15/2018 at 11:06 AM, Huckleberry said:

The Greatest Generation raised the Baby Boomers. Sometimes when people work their asses off and sacrifice more than nearly anyone else they overreact and shelter their children from ever having to do the same.

Kellen Sr. is a Baby Boomer, and Kellen Jr. is a Millennial. 

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Gil Bang

Gil Bang 26048

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On 6/15/2018 at 6:46 AM, hpslugga said:

There was a poster from the old Hornfans days that went by the name Nuclear Bear who honestly believed that cloud of feculent matter was, in his words, "the greatest tight end in the history of college football." Part of me wishes his stupid ass was still around just so we could be entertained by his verbal effluvia attempting to defend that clown.

If he's a Baylor Bear he probably approves all these rapes.

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bularry1

bularry1 23

Posted
Posted
On 6/15/2018 at 8:46 AM, hpslugga said:

There was a poster from the old Hornfans days that went by the name Nuclear Bear who honestly believed that cloud of feculent matter was, in his words, "the greatest tight end in the history of college football." Part of me wishes his stupid ass was still around just so we could be entertained by his verbal effluvia attempting to defend that clown.

How many years ago was that?  Do you recall every petty internet football argument you ever participated in?  because arguing about great college TE's is pretty high on the "petty" scale.

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hpslugga

hpslugga 4062

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4 hours ago, bularry1 said:

How many years ago was that?  Do you recall every petty internet football argument you ever participated in?  because arguing about great college TE's is pretty high on the "petty" scale.

I remember that one because it contained an outrageous element, namely the “I have a higher football IQ than all of you” line. It’s the same reason that if I were to utter the name “traveshamockery,” anyone familiar with that name would almost instantly associate it with “oh yeah, the kstate fan that wouldn’t stop bragging about Jordy Nelson.”

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WhatTheBuck

WhatTheBuck 28806

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37 minutes ago, hpslugga said:

It’s the same reason that if I were to utter the name “traveshamockery,” anyone familiar with that name would almost instantly associate it with “oh yeah, the kstate fan that wouldn’t stop bragging about Jordy Nelson.”

I'd instantly associate it with Mr. Show.

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closetojumping

closetojumping 62883

Posted
Posted
8 hours ago, bularry1 said:

How many years ago was that?  Do you recall every petty internet football argument you ever participated in?  because arguing about great college TE's is pretty high on the "petty" scale.

Far be it for me to ever take a position even vaguely supportive of something hpslugga is doing, but what’s wrong with being petty? I thought this was the Internet, and a college football board, to boot. If we can’t be petty, what is left, sir?

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MaybeACoordinator

MaybeACoordinator 8349

Posted
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5 hours ago, hpslugga said:

I remember that one because it contained an outrageous element, namely the “I have a higher football IQ than all of you” line. It’s the same reason that if I were to utter the name “traveshamockery,” anyone familiar with that name would almost instantly associate it with “oh yeah, the kstate fan that wouldn’t stop bragging about Jordy Nelson.”

Oh what a time we all had mocking that idiot. Until game day. FAT times. Bah.

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ImissWallyPryor

ImissWallyPryor 9046

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7 hours ago, hpslugga said:

I remember that one because it contained an outrageous element, namely the “I have a higher football IQ than all of you” line. It’s the same reason that if I were to utter the name “traveshamockery,” anyone familiar with that name would almost instantly associate it with “oh yeah, the kstate fan that wouldn’t stop bragging about Jordy Nelson.”

What I remember most about that was the Shagsters who mocked him for predicting that a white (a point made by Shagsters, not traveshamockery) wr would torch our non-white dbs. 

Edited by ImissWallyPryor
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bularry1

bularry1 23

Posted
Posted
17 hours ago, hpslugga said:

I remember that one because it contained an outrageous element, namely the “I have a higher football IQ than all of you” line. It’s the same reason that if I were to utter the name “traveshamockery,” anyone familiar with that name would almost instantly associate it with “oh yeah, the kstate fan that wouldn’t stop bragging about Jordy Nelson.”

fair points

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bularry1

bularry1 23

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13 hours ago, closetojumping said:

Far be it for me to ever take a position even vaguely supportive of something hpslugga is doing, but what’s wrong with being petty? I thought this was the Internet, and a college football board, to boot. If we can’t be petty, what is left, sir?

I'm okay with petty.  but hornfans was a long time ago.  remembering petty arguments from that time period is what most impressed me.

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Beau Vine

Beau Vine 54466

Posted
Posted

Apparently more than a bit rapey:

Quote

VISTA, Calif. -- Kellen Winslow II, the retired NFL tight end already facing multiple rape and kidnapping charges, was arraigned Thursday on a new charge -- forcibly raping a 17-year-old female who was unconscious at the time.

Winslow, now 34, was 19 at the time of the alleged rape that took place in June 2003 in a San Diego County residence, according to Dan Owens, deputy district attorney in San Diego County.

"California law allows for certain specified sexual offenses to be charged regardless of the time of their commission under certain circumstances," Owens said. "Those circumstances are met in this case. ...

"When there is a rape that occurs and the victim is under the age of 18 years old, there is no statutory time (limit) to when that can be charged. That's exactly what we have here." 

Owens declined to provide information when asked if publicity around the previous charges led the alleged victim, now 32, to come forward. 

The other felony counts include two counts of rape, two counts of kidnapping with intent to commit rape and one count of forcible sodomy. Winslow pleaded not guilty to all charges Thursday at a preliminary hearing in San Diego County Courthouse.

 

The other two alleged victims are 58 and 54, and one said she was homeless at the time. USA TODAY does not release the identities of alleged victims. 

 

Superior Court Judge Harry M. Elias  reduced two criminal counts of attempted burglary to misdemeanors, but Winslow could face life in prison on the remaining eight counts. Elias found enough evidence to move forward on those counts.

Bail was set at $2 million. Winslow's attorneys said he would post bail and be released Thursday or Friday.

 

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