the 2023 speaker of the house voting thread of implosion

[SimonBolivar 10,910]

What's our current record for non-Jordan R votes in previous two rounds? 22?

[ConferenceRoom 6,123]

Just now, Rimbo said:

Oh, boy! I LOVE story time! Here's one:

Once upon a time, there was a young eel, deep in the coral reef. He lived a happy life and never thought of anything but feasting on the tasty fish and shrimp that lived in the bottom of the ocean with him, swimming and feeling the push of the tide as it drew him in and out, and sleeping in his comfortable hidey-hole. It was a comfortable life, and he was content.  Until one day, as he was swimming about, a wise old shark swam by. "Little eel," said the shark. "Are you not lonely? Do you not often wish for companionship?"  The little eel thought about it. "No, sir," he said. "I am quite content swimming around and eating delicious shrimp and living in my hidey-hole."  "Suit yourself," said the old shark. But as he swam away, he added, "Might as well forget I asked."  Now, if that shark had said something like, "Mark my words," or if the shark had emphasized the importance of it, then the young eel would have done just that. But since the shark had made nothing of it and, in fact, had told the eel to forget it, quite naturally the eel could think of nothing else for days. And because he could think of nothing else, he became very unhappy with his life indeed. He became bitter about his shrimp and fish dinners and uncomfortable with his hidey-hole. And when he went out to swim with the tide, surrounded by the population of the reef, it only made him feel lonelier.  "Oh stuff all these things!" he said. "I was never unhappy about it, but now I am unhappy without a companion! I must find one." And so the young eel swam off in search of a companion.  Within minutes, he found another eel. "Hello, Miss eel," he said to her. "Would you like to be my companion?"  "Oh, no," she said. "I have a companion already, and all these little fry to take care of! But thank you for the offer." And he swam away, disappointed, but he did not expect to be so lucky on the first try.  He came up to another eel a couple of hours later. "Hello, Miss eel," he said to her. "I would like a companion."  "You would, would you?" said she. "Well, good luck with your search."  "Would you like to be my companion?" he asked.  "I am not interested in a companion at this time." And he swam away, quite perturbed.  A couple of days later, he came upon another eel. "My dearest Miss eel," he said to her. "Isn't it a lovely day for companionship? Would you like to join me?"  "No," she said.  "Why not?" asked he.  "Because," she said, "In all honesty, you seem a bit too eager for companionship to me. And I wonder, what is it you are looking for that you haven't found?"  "I am looking for a companion," he said. "I was happy in my hole, eating shrimp and fish and swimming with the tide, but then I realized that I did not have a companion, and that I must have a companion to be happy."  "But my dear Mister eel," she replied. "If you are not satisfied without a companion, what makes you think you will find something with one? Companionship is as much about giving as it is about taking. Are you ready to give? I can tell you are not. You are thinking only of what you want. Now do go, I have had a busy day of swimming and need my rest."  And the young eel was more frustrated than ever, and darted back to his hidey-hole, bitter and upset.  He had been there a week, pouting and grouchy, before the shark swam by again. "What's this?" he asked the little eel. "What happened to my happy young eel? I think I have not seen an eel so miserable as this in all my years! Do you no longer enjoy your shrimp and fish and your swimming with the tide and your coze hidey-hole?"  "No!" the young eel nearly shouted. "I do not have a companion to share this with me! And I must have one to be happy," he said.  "Oh, dear," said the shark. "You do now? You didn't before."  "Well, yes," said the eel. "I was quite content before. But then the idea of having a companion -- well it seemed so nice! Someone I can snuggle with in my cozy hidey-hole. I can catch a big fish or shrimp and split it with her! We can swim in the ocean together."  "Those sound quite nice. But they seem quite nice even without a companion, no?"  "Well, yes, but now that I think of how it might feel to do them with someone..."  "Perhaps that is the case. Perhaps there is no more enjoyment to be had in these things," said the shark, and he swam away.  Now if that shark had pointed out to the eel that the things he had enjoyed were still just as fun as they had been before, the eel never would have thought another thing of it. But because the shark said there was no more enjoyment to be had, the young eel began to think.  "You know, I do still like my hidey-hole. It is a very nice hidey-hole by itself. And I enjoy swimming in the water just as much as I always did. And the little fish I ate yesterday was particularly good. I would enjoy them just as much as I did before if I don't have a companion. Why would I miss the joy without them?"  And so the little eel stopped worrying about having a companion, and began to enjoy his life once again. He still had that longing in his heart, but he was no longer a miserable young eel. He was happy again.  One month later, the water was warming up as Spring began to arrive, and he was just the happiest little eel swimming about, when someone came up to him.  "Pardon me," she said. "I couldn't help but notice how much you were enjoying the water here."  "Dance with me!" said the little eel. "It's fun, but it's even more fun if we do it together!" And she did. And the two eels spun and coiled and danced, and all the fish and life around the reef were amazed at the beauty of their dance.  Just then, the eel spotted a large tiger shrimp! "Over there!" he said to the other eel. "Those taste wonderful, but they are too large for one little eel to eat. Would you like to split one with me?"  "Oh, I don't know," she replied.  "You don't have to if you don't want to. Here, I'll catch some for myself, and you may try it if you like." And he shot forward and snapped and bit the tiger shrimp clean in two. He nudged the tastiest part, the head, to the female eel, and she ate it. Together, they ate the delicious shrimp.  "You know," she said, "I've had them before, but for some reason, like this, it tastes better!"  "Yes," the little eel yawned, "I think... I think you're right!" And the little eel was very tired.  "I must retire to my cozy hidey-hole. It is truly a nice hidey-hole. Great for sleep. I am tired."  "Oh, I do love a good hidey-hole," she said.  "Would you... would you like to share mine with me?"  "I do believe I would!"  And so the young eel snuggled up in his hidey-hole with his new companion, and they went to sleep.  The wise old shark watched all this from afar, while an even older lobster ambled up to him.  "You knew that the little eel would finally find love all along?" the lobster.  "Of course," said the shark. "That's a moray."

 

God, I wish I still had access to Mr. Wizard's Star Trek/Star Wars spec script from Shaggy. 

[tokamak 6,350]

Lost another one, Molinaro-NY (yet again a Biden district). He has not gained any so far from the 2nd vote.

[Guest]

This looks to trend 30+

[tokamak 6,350]

3 minutes ago, SimonBolivar said:

What's our current record for non-Jordan R votes in previous two rounds? 22?

First vote = 20 against

Second vote = 22 against

[TexasEd 8,064]

Just now, FirstTimeCaller said:

This looks to trend 30+

And it's all the Dems fault

 

[Rimbo 25,766]

3 minutes ago, ConferenceRoom said:

God, I wish I still had access to Mr. Wizard's Star Trek/Star Wars spec script from Shaggy. 

Yep. Same. Had to go home-grown for that instead. Paragraphs were not preserved in copy/paste which really just makes the desired result all the better.

[Red Five 40,627]

1 minute ago, TexasEd said:

And it's all the Dems fault

 

Why won't the dems help elect someone who will impeach Biden for no reason? Bastards. 

[yoladu 4,066]

1 minute ago, tokamak said:

Lost another one, Molinaro-NY (yet again a Biden district). He has not gained any so far from the 2nd vote.

i almost feel like these additional rounds are an attempt for some Republicans in Biden districts to save themselves from their previous votes FOR Jordan.

See, see.. i am a moderate.. i voted against Jordan, it's right there.. round 3.

[shakahorn 1,625]

3 minutes ago, TexasEd said:

And it's all the Dems fault

 

96% oF tHe No VoTeS cAMe fRoM dEMoCRaTs !!!

[Guest]

Question for those in the know -- at the Texas Capitol, you can just walk in and sit in the gallery. Same thing at the US Capitol? (Or does entry require special access or in the performance of an insurrection?)

Edited October 20, 2023 by FirstTimeCaller

[Beau Vine 53,978]

2 hours ago, Wally Fairway said:

Matt Gaetz - representative from Florida Congressman Matt Gaetz | Representing the 1st District of Florida (house.gov)
Matt Gertz - Sr. Fellow at Media Matters Matt Gertz | Media Matters for America

the first one initiated the revolution, the second one is just reporting on it

[bernorange 8,348]

1 hour ago, Bozo_Casanova said:

I'm dead

[TexasEd 8,064]

25!

 

 

[tokamak 6,350]

7 minutes ago, shakahorn said:

96% oF tHe No VoTeS cAMe fRoM dEMoCRaTs !!!

Hey, that percentage is moving down. Clearly the Democrats are coming around.

[Js1 85,085]

Just now, TexasEd said:

25!

 

 

[locodos 5,330]

found a live stream..

 

[texasdago 7,552]

[TexasHooch 5,117]

11 minutes ago, TexasEd said:

And it's all the Dems fault

 

He keeps arguing that it's the Dem's fault because they represented 96% of the "No" votes.  I wish she would have asked him what would have happened if they had represented 100% of the "No" votes.

[Js1 85,085]

2 minutes ago, TexasHooch said:

He keeps arguing that it's the Dem's fault because they represented 96% of the "No" votes.  I wish she would have asked him what would have happened if they had represented 100% of the "No" votes.

I wish she'd ask him "Why should a Dem vote for a GOP speaker? Did you vote for Pelosi in 2019 and 2021?"

[Blotto 23,424]

15 hours ago, bernorange said:

Why is laughing at someone because of their height socially acceptable?

Fuck short people. They need to be pulling themselves up by their bootstraps instead of crying about how unfair the world is. 

[Brisketexan 104,537]

38 minutes ago, Biff Tannen said:

Threatening the wives and families of people who don't vote for you seems like peak fascism.

This is very, very important.  Understand that this is no longer an outlier.  This is a core part of how the GQP functions.  It. Is. A. Terrorist.  Organization.  This is how criminal gangs work -- when your political "team" uses violent intimidation as a primary tool, it is no longer a political party.  It is a terrorist movement, and should be treated as such.

[Bozo_Casanova 26,271]

5 minutes ago, locodos said:

found a live stream..

 

I could watch that video on look for hours. 

[The Dog 43,784]

 

[Chad Fuck 17,548]

13 minutes ago, bernorange said:

Live look at gym.

[TexasHooch 5,117]

Group aligned with Freedom Caucus is behind pro-Jordan pressure campaign

From CNN's Melanie Zanona

The Conservative Partnership Institute — a group headed up by former Freedom Caucus Chair Mark Meadows, who is Jim Jordan’s close ally — has been an active player in the intense, outside pressure campaign aimed at boosting Jordan’s speakership candidacy, sources tell CNN. 

CPI has been coordinating calls and helping strategize with right-wing activists about ways to apply pressure on holdouts and whip up support for Jordan, sources say.

Jordan has denounced the threats and harassment some of his detractors are facing, and has denied any involvement in the right-wing intimidation tactics. But CPI is very closely tied to the Freedom Caucus, which even holds their weekly meetings at CPI’s headquarters. 

There’s growing anger among the holdouts over the bullying they are facing from some of Jordan’s allies on the right, and they say they are disappointed with Jordan’s response — which is only hardening their opposition. 

Rep. Don Bacon tells CNN: “Jordan and his team are in denial over the threats and harassment his supporters are doing. Jordan’s response has been tepid.”

Edited October 20, 2023 by TexasHooch

[deech 2,251]

51 minutes ago, Biff Tannen said:

Threatening the wives and families of people who don't vote for you seems like peak fascism.

 

Edited October 20, 2023 by deech

[bernorange 8,348]

Can any of the GOP fools that are voting for Jordan not understand that strong arm, death threat, bullying M.O. is what he would bring to the table as Speaker were he elected?  I'm disappointed but not surprised at my go along to get along Rep voting for this asshole.

[4th&Five 41,457]

[The Dog 43,784]

Crenshaw has said he won't vote for Jordan after this. 

I'd expect most of the Biden district GOP members (other than Santos) will continue to drop. 

[Wally Fairway 5,517]

18 minutes ago, Blotto said:

Fuck short people. They need to be pulling themselves up by their bootstraps instead of crying about how unfair the world is. 

They should be told to grow up

[Bozo_Casanova 26,271]

6 minutes ago, deech said:

 

WOW, deep cut Tombstone reference. A+

[ConferenceRoom 6,123]

Michael Rooker rules. 

[Beau Vine 53,978]

I seriously don't understand what the point of continuing to hold votes is.  

Are they just stalling?  They think this is good because the government can't work?

[Js1 85,085]

Just now, Beau Vine said:

I seriously don't understand what the point of continuing to hold votes is.  

Gymbo is a big fan of “ow my balls?” Or he’s just proving how fucking aggy the GOP really is. Keep rolling shit out, losing and trying again and again 

[Chuckie Finster 22,598]

Just now, Beau Vine said:

I seriously don't understand what the point of continuing to hold votes is.  

Are they just stalling?  They think this is good because the government can't work?

Some of them genuinely think this is just a negotiating tactic and the other members will eventually come around like they did with McCarthy.

Some of them are in disbelief that Jordan is this unpopular.

Some of them just like to watch the world burn.

 

[texasdago 7,552]

Dollars to donuts vote 4 will be incoming sooner or later

[ConferenceRoom 6,123]

Beyond the hubris and inability to read the room, is it as simple as betting that the electorate will buy the rhetoric blaming the Democrats? I feel pretty good about that strategy backfiring if that's what they're doing. 

[TexasHooch 5,117]

CNN is doing a goo job with the live updates.  Here's the latest:

 

[bernorange 8,348]

2 minutes ago, Beau Vine said:

I seriously don't understand what the point of continuing to hold votes is.  

Are they just stalling?  They think this is good because the government can't work?

C-SPAN covered an impromptu press conference on the steps of the Capitol.  Gaetz et al seem to really believe that they can win support for Jordan.  Delusional.

[Pig Bellmont 8,691]

This is the result of zero sum politics. GOP won’t abide ANY compromise with Dems so there’s been zero effort to offer them anything of substance in exchange for being able to function. And since they can’t get their own conference in line - they’d rather just embarrass themselves over and over and over

[TexasHooch 5,117]

McCarthy thinks he can get it back.  He may be right.

 

[Pig Bellmont 8,691]

Just now, bernorange said:

C-SPAN covered an impromptu press conference on the steps of the Capitol.  Gaetz et al seem to really believe that they can win support for Jordan.  Delusional.

It’s especially delusional after the death threats. Those votes are never happening 

[DDD Dad 14,243]

[texasdago 7,552]

At least McCarthy finally said it out loud that Gaetz and his team are responsible but I fully expect him to go on Fox News and blame the Democrats once again.

[Bozo_Casanova 26,271]

Clown Caucus

 

[Js1 85,085]

It would be helpful if CNN would have on senior Dem House leadership to reiterate that it’s not their job to bail out the GOP or elect a speaker for a body where they don’t have the majority. And that the GOP didn’t vote for Pelosi in 2019 or 2021.

But no, let’s put on a bunch of GOP members to blame the Dems 

Edited October 20, 2023 by Js1

[TexasEd 8,064]

4 minutes ago, bernorange said:

C-SPAN covered an impromptu press conference on the steps of the Capitol.  Gaetz et al seem to really believe that they can win support for Jordan.  Delusional.

Yeah, they offered themselves as martyrs if Jordan gets the speaker but they know no-one would take it so it was a hollow offer.

[Red Five 40,627]

1 minute ago, Js1 said:

It would be helpful if CNN would have on senior Dem House leadership to reiterate that it’s not their job to bail out the GOP or elect a speaker for a body where they don’t have the majority. And that the GOP didn’t vote for Pelosi in 2019 or 2021. 

"I'm sorry, you're asking me why democrats aren't voting for republicans?" 

[SubliminalHorn 6,672]

55 minutes ago, G650 said:

Is it that obscure? I figured everyone over a certain age would know that song by heart

What age? Like 65+? I would bet young millennials and Gen Z have no fucking clue about that song