Jump to content

88th Texas Legislature

atomheartbevo

By atomheartbevo
in Cloak Room

 Share

Recommended Posts

Brisketexan

Brisketexan 106618

Posted
Posted
When do I get a fertile young female assigned to me for procreation?

Dude. It’s texas, we’re trying to make A Handmaid’s Tale into a documentary. Buddy up to GQP leadership, and you’ll have one assigned to you by the next legislative session (or the one after that, tops).
  • Hook 'Em 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites
  • Replies 1.6k
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Popular Days

Top Posters In This Topic

Popular Days

Popular Posts

Js1
Js1
StassneyHorn
StassneyHorn

I vaguely remember some rumblings about Talarico. I think he’s going to be a huge presence in years to come. Loved this exchange he had, shows he does his homework, didn’t seem like he was talking at,

SubliminalHorn
SubliminalHorn

And this is the best we’ll get out of the brainwashed republicans. Just get them to not vote. They’ll never vote for a Democrat because, well, they don’t even really know why, but they won’t. Just do

Posted Images

atomheartbevo

atomheartbevo 90546

Posted
  • Author
Posted
5 hours ago, tx 3 putt said:

I’m curious what the breaking point will be 

4 hours ago, CooterBrown said:

Don’t kid yourself. There’s not one. The average Texan is a complete piece of shit.

Birth control.  I don't know what they will go after first, but I'm guessing The Pill.

Alternative: They enact a Louisiana-style porn bill where you have to show state ID to view porn online.

And I do believe they will go after one or the other.

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Anastasis

Anastasis 23699

Posted
Posted

Was playing blackjack in an Oklahoma casino and the okie I was playing with was bitching about the 50 cent ante to the state that each player had to make on each hand. He suggested that an okie DL should be exempt him from paying it. Told that fucker that I’d be ok with the same table odds if Texas would pull its head out of its ass on casinos. He started talking how he knew when he passed the Oklahoma state line when the state highways went to shit.  

  • Rage+1 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites
hayden_horn

hayden_horn 11401

Posted
Posted
15 hours ago, Anastasis said:

Was playing blackjack in an Oklahoma casino and the okie I was playing with was bitching about the 50 cent ante to the state that each player had to make on each hand. He suggested that an okie DL should be exempt him from paying it. Told that fucker that I’d be ok with the same table odds if Texas would pull its head out of its ass on casinos. He started talking how he knew when he passed the Oklahoma state line when the state highways went to shit.  

we used to talk so much shit about louisiana and crossing that state line back in the day. i shit you not, it's still bad, but it used to be smooth sailing until pothole fucking city on the louisiana side of the bridge. 

now the roles are somewhat, if not completely, reversed. it's fucking maddening.

  • Hook 'Em 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Js1

Js1 86940

Posted
Posted
2 minutes ago, hayden_horn said:

we used to talk so much shit about louisiana and crossing that state line back in the day. i shit you not, it's still bad, but it used to be smooth sailing until pothole fucking city on the louisiana side of the bridge. 

now the roles are somewhat, if not completely, reversed. it's fucking maddening.

Yeah but Freedomland!  

Link to comment
Share on other sites
tx 3 putt

tx 3 putt 78470

Posted
Posted

tik tok gone from state campus wi-fi systems.

they're going hard on drag shows. any place hosting a drag show, will have to be a sexually oriented business. Per some maga state rep, men dressed in women's underwear are letting kids stuff dollar bills in drag queen undies. WE MUST PROTECT THE CHILDREN !!!

Link to comment
Share on other sites
BearSchlong

BearSchlong 8231

Posted
Posted

I wanna know which legislator’s wife likes drag shows, and why he hates her so much.

Dade Phelan’s older brother and I (unknowingly, we were underage and thought it was a biker bar) walked into a gay bar one afternoon for a pitcher of beer and a game of pool. Not sure why I all of a sudden remembered that.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites
atomheartbevo

atomheartbevo 90546

Posted
  • Author
Posted
8 hours ago, hayden_horn said:

we used to talk so much shit about louisiana and crossing that state line back in the day. i shit you not, it's still bad, but it used to be smooth sailing until pothole fucking city on the louisiana side of the bridge. 

now the roles are somewhat, if not completely, reversed. it's fucking maddening.

Fucking hate when we get into Oklahoma on the turnpikes and they're fantastic.  Meanwhile, I haven't been able to drive through Dallas from Austin on up through Oklahoma and points N/E, without running into some kind of construction over the past 25 years, minus one or two years.

It's gotta be a huge fucking scam, making some developers (probably out-of-staters or even foreigners) a shitload of money.  Those highways will never be done.

50 minutes ago, Anastasis said:

Is there a connection between tik tok and drags shows or was that two separate thoughts. I mean cause fuck tik tok. 

China.

  • Hook 'Em 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Guest

Guest

Posted
Posted

So what's on the table for addressing another Uvalde? You know, because a special session couldn't be called and Abbott promised that something would be done during the regular session.

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Js1

Js1 86940

Posted
Posted
50 minutes ago, FirstTimeCaller said:

So what's on the table for addressing another Uvalde? You know, because a special session couldn't be called and Abbott promised that something would be done during the regular session.

Mandatory AR-15s for anyone within 500 feet of a school. 

The only way to stop a bad guy with a gun is to arm every K-12 student with a gun.  And the teachers.  And the janitors.  And the crossing guards. 

  • Like 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites
HornOnTheBayou

HornOnTheBayou 9056

Posted
Posted
55 minutes ago, FirstTimeCaller said:

So what's on the table for addressing another Uvalde? You know, because a special session couldn't be called and Abbott promised that something would be done during the regular session.

We're locking doors now. What else do you want?!?

And, actually, that's not even happening anymore. At the beginning of the year, district and TEA officials would come by my campus at least once a week and check interior and exterior doors to make sure they were locked. But I haven't seen any of them around since October, so I guess we're done with that too. "Thoughts and prayers" it is.

Link to comment
Share on other sites
YGIFS

YGIFS 19456

Posted
Posted (edited)
11 hours ago, CooterBrown said:

Bob the Drag Queen is opening for Madonna at the Moody Center in September. Is UT going to register as a sexually oriented business?

You laugh but Dan Patrick is already planning on blocking this.  I'm 90% sure it's gonna become a "thing" with him (it's a privately funded venue, but there's no denying it's state lands).  And I'm already 20% sure there's gonna be a special session about it over the Summer.  I wish I was kidding.

Edited by YGIFS
  • Rage+1 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Nice Guy Eddie

Nice Guy Eddie 13707

Posted
Posted

So what's the ultimate fall out of property tax reform that gives the average home owner $175-500 back? I believe there are different reforms under consideration. 

My understanding is that this mainly targets school taxes. I was under the belief that if a school doesn't hit their allowable tax revenue target based on student days, the state was obligated to make up the shortfall. And if the school receives too much in tax revenue, they owe it to the state.

If the ISDs are collecting less school tax revenue, doesn't that put a huge burden on the state? Why do I want to think that the burden will somehow be shifted to the poorer school districts to get less help while the average wealthy ISD will be kept whole?

Link to comment
Share on other sites
bolverk

bolverk 30231

Posted
Posted
8 minutes ago, Nice Guy Eddie said:

So what's the ultimate fall out of property tax reform that gives the average home owner $175-500 back? I believe there are different reforms under consideration. 

My understanding is that this mainly targets school taxes. I was under the belief that if a school doesn't hit their allowable tax revenue target based on student days, the state was obligated to make up the shortfall. And if the school receives too much in tax revenue, they owe it to the state.

If the ISDs are collecting less school tax revenue, doesn't that put a huge burden on the state? Why do I want to think that the burden will somehow be shifted to the poorer school districts to get less help while the average wealthy ISD will be kept whole?

I'd wager whatever they do will shift it to where Austin ISD will be sending three-quarters of its revenue to the state rather than just half.

  • Hook 'Em 1
  • Rage+1 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Neonmoon

Neonmoon 38130

Posted
Posted
13 hours ago, CooterBrown said:

Bob the Drag Queen is opening for Madonna at the Moody Center in September. Is UT going to register as a sexually oriented business?

I hope Abbott prohibits this from happening and Madonna cancels all her shows in Texas, because fuck Abbott

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Texas Jeff

Texas Jeff 1998

Posted
Posted
On 1/19/2023 at 9:14 AM, Nice Guy Eddie said:

So what's the ultimate fall out of property tax reform that gives the average home owner $175-500 back? I believe there are different reforms under consideration. 

My understanding is that this mainly targets school taxes. I was under the belief that if a school doesn't hit their allowable tax revenue target based on student days, the state was obligated to make up the shortfall. And if the school receives too much in tax revenue, they owe it to the state.

If the ISDs are collecting less school tax revenue, doesn't that put a huge burden on the state? Why do I want to think that the burden will somehow be shifted to the poorer school districts to get less help while the average wealthy ISD will be kept whole?

You are correct, for the part of school finance that pays for daily operations (like teacher pay).  The part of school finance that is related to building schools is not part of Robin Hood.  For operations, money comes in to the state based on property tax rates and money goes out to the districts based on a funding formula.  The funding formula is the key to how teachers get paid in Texas.

Right now the Robin Hood plan is bringing in more money than the state is obligated to give out.  So if you live in Austin or Eanes or any other "rich" district, some of your school tax money is going to the state and just staying there as a budget surplus.  It's not going back to the schools.

So, there is room for property tax "reform" which might mean "compressing" tax rates more, which would mean that your school tax goes down, Robin Hood payments go down, and excess school tax doesn't just pile up in state coffers or go to other state programs.  Balance the equation...

Alternatively, the state could increase the funding formula.  Keep tax rates where they are but raise the "entitlement" for districts so that teachers are paid more.  This would also balance the equation.  We would have to replace a few teachers that died of disbelief that this actually happened, but most would survive and be able to pay their rent.

Or, the state could find a new source of revenue, like maybe a 1% state sales tax.  They could lower property taxes and raise teacher pay.

Right now there is a mismatch between the money coming to the state and the money going out to the schools.  Most of the proposals that I have seen relate to resolving that mismatch, or shifting tax burdens between property tax and other taxes.

Link to comment
Share on other sites
YGIFS

YGIFS 19456

Posted
Posted

I am super fucking confused (as usual).  Our ISD Superintendent and some of his senior staff invited me to a lobbyist luncheon near the Capitol.  The guest list is half lobbyists for public school coalitions.  The other half are lobbyists for voucher groups.  I honestly have no idea what the fuck the point of this is going to be and I definitely picked the wrong week to quit drinking.  I'm guessing our district is playing long-game, if vouchers do come to fruition...we'll be one of those most sought out districts for incoming transfers (we already have several hundred across the district) and that's a huge infusion of money.  

Our district is one of those that overpays into recapture and two of our campuses are literally falling apart and among the most dilapidated.  Our teachers make only $1500 more than the state average, we have a massive retention problem, and the cost of living in this part of Austin is such that none of them can afford to live anywhere near where they work.  We literally have teachers/staff commuting in from Temple, Belton, Seguin, etc.  I can't imagine their fuel costs.  But nobody outside our district gives a shit because our student outcomes look good on paper.  Obviously we can tack on more bonds to fix the buildings, adding to our already crippling property tax bill.  But there has got to be some happy medium where more of recapture is either distributed back to schools in conjunction with our rising overall tax bill due to needed maintenance and construction.  But instead they're treated as two separate silos and debt service platforms.  When that's not really the case.   

Also, they want to build a massive and very expensive parking garage at our high school which I think is dumb as fuck.  Enrollment is in decline, driver licenses are in decline, single-rider automobile are in decline.  And such a garage wouldn't be delivered until 2029-30 school year when those rates will continue to plummet at a higher rate.  If we're gonna build it, it should be purpose-built to have entire levels eventually converted to learning space or athletics practice areas.  But of course, that's more expensive out of the gate and our bond bandwidth doesn't allow for that this cycle.  So 20 years from now, we can all enjoy a massive fucking eyesore and financial miscalculation.  /rant

This session is gonna be good for UT and higher ed, which is nice.  And gonna be a total shitshow for K-12.  

  • Hook 'Em 2
  • Rage+1 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Js1

Js1 86940

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, Texas Jeff said:

Right now the Robin Hood plan is bringing in more money than the state is obligated to give out.  So if you live in Austin or Eanes or any other "rich" district, some of your school tax money is going to the state and just staying there as a budget surplus.  It's not going back to the schools.

 

The state is overinflating the rainy day fund by withholding from public education? No way 

  • Rage+1 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Nice Guy Eddie

Nice Guy Eddie 13707

Posted
Posted
5 hours ago, YGIFS said:

   

Also, they want to build a massive and very expensive parking garage at our high school which I think is dumb as fuck.  Enrollment is in decline, driver licenses are in decline, single-rider automobile are in decline.  And such a garage wouldn't be delivered until 2029-30 school year when those rates will continue to plummet at a higher rate.  If we're gonna build it, it should be purpose-built to have entire levels eventually converted to learning space or athletics practice areas.  But of course, that's more expensive out of the gate and our bond bandwidth doesn't allow for that this cycle.  So 20 years from now, we can all enjoy a massive fucking eyesore and financial miscalculation.  /rant

Someone high up has a brother-in-law who owns a company that builds parking garages. 

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites
YGIFS

YGIFS 19456

Posted
Posted
Just now, Nice Guy Eddie said:

Someone high up has a brother-in-law who owns a company that builds parking garages. 

That's what I've been thinking.  Sure as shit wish somebody high up had a brother-in-law with a plumbing company because the bathrooms across our district are a pretty sad state of affairs.  When you'd rather hold it and piss at Posse East, there's an issue.  

 i Realize it didn't have to do with Legislature's education agenda, but the way they pretend bond issuances (like the 2-3 coming down the pike at our ISD) at the district level fall wildly separate from regular recapture is very misleading to voters.  When you cut your check and the line item for ISD goes to the state, they don't collect it all and then calculate what each specific homeowner owes in terms of debt service on the bonds issued since they bought the home.  and send that portion directly back to the schools to pay their underwriters/bondholders.  

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Brisketexan

Brisketexan 106618

Posted
Posted

So, a bit of chuckleworthy irony struck our household this weekend.
Remember how Trump loves him some Norway, asking why we don't get all our immigrants from there instead of "shithole countries?"
And remember how our own Lite Guv, Dan Patrick, couldn't fellate Donny boy hard enough?
And how that same Lite Guv stays awake all night, every night, worried about which bathroom people go to?
Daughter posted this observation from Oslo (she's visiting a friend there this weekend):
 
a310d78a681f15699cd40ada7bea97c6.jpg

I have seen the “shithole country.” It’s us.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites
  • 3 weeks later...
Pescado_Rojo

Pescado_Rojo 19558

Posted
Posted
7 minutes ago, Blotto said:

As good a place as any for this

https://www.kvue.com/article/news/crime/sen-charles-j-schwertner-arrested-charged-with-dwi/269-37dfda00-9b72-493b-8adc-77c49fa9f9ce

This dude is a shining beacon of hope. A true credit to the state. 

This asshole is my State Senator, Gerrymandered into the seat for as long as he wants it or until he's convicted of DWI and some other Republican Shitbird takes over. 

Same guy: University of Texas investigating Sexual misconduct allegations against Charles Schwertner

Spoiler Alert: Sent a med student a dick pic and flirty text through an encrypted burner account, claimed a 3rd person had access to the account, refused to make the 3rd person available to investigators. UT closed the investigation and "cleared" him of Title IX violations. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites
NotActuallyALonghorn

NotActuallyALonghorn 4998

Posted
Posted
On 1/17/2023 at 10:00 PM, BearSchlong said:

I wanna know which legislator’s wife likes drag shows, and why he hates her so much.

Dade Phelan’s older brother and I (unknowingly, we were underage and thought it was a biker bar) walked into a gay bar one afternoon for a pitcher of beer and a game of pool. Not sure why I all of a sudden remembered that.

 

On 1/18/2023 at 8:23 AM, HenryJames said:

Police Academy (1984)

12936558_837805523032621_193168210495822

  • Like 1
  • Haha 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites
HRSchenker

HRSchenker 2331

Posted
Posted
On 2/8/2023 at 10:11 AM, Blotto said:

As good a place as any for this

https://www.kvue.com/article/news/crime/sen-charles-j-schwertner-arrested-charged-with-dwi/269-37dfda00-9b72-493b-8adc-77c49fa9f9ce

This dude is a shining beacon of hope. A true credit to the state. 

Just wait until the media finds out he was allegedly with Claudia Ordaz-Perez that night..... 

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Beau Vine

Beau Vine 55824

Posted
Posted
On 1/21/2023 at 5:36 PM, Brisketexan said:

I have seen the “shithole country.” It’s us.

Quote

Texas banned more books from school libraries this past year than any other state in the nation, targeting titles centering on race, racism, abortion and LGBTQ representation and issues, according to a new analysis by PEN America, a nonprofit organization advocating for free speech.

The report released on Monday found that school administrators in Texas have banned 801 books across 22 school districts, and 174 titles were banned at least twice between July 2021 through June 2022. PEN America defines a ban as any action taken against a book based on its content after challenges from parents or lawmakers.

The most frequent books removed included “Gender Queer: A Memoir” by Maia Kobabe, which depicts Kobabe’s journey of gender identity and sexual orientation; “The Bluest Eye” by Toni Morrison; “Roe v. Wade: A Woman's Choice?” by Susan Dudley Gold; “Out of Darkness” by Ashley Hope Pérez, which follows a love story between a Mexican American teenage girl and a Black teen boy in 1930s East Texas; and “All Boys Aren’t Blue” by George M. Johnson, a personal account of growing up black and queer in Plainfield, New Jersey.

https://www.texastribune.org/2022/09/19/texas-book-bans/

  • Rage+1 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites
ChuckNorrisActionJeans

ChuckNorrisActionJeans 2692

Posted
Posted
On 2/10/2023 at 6:30 AM, HRSchenker said:

Just wait until the media finds out he was allegedly with Claudia Ordaz-Perez that night..... 

Hmmm.  And then what will happen? No reporting except by boutiques like Texas Tribune? And then crickets? Sorry, this guy is total shit, but my cynicism has been metastasized by Paxton and his ilk 

Link to comment
Share on other sites
 Share
Go to topic listing


Football ... Basketball ... Baseball ... Other Sports ... Futbol ... 🤫995🤫 ... Gambling ... Movies & TV ... Music ... Hobbies ... Lulz ... Food & Travel ... Daily Texan ... Business and Markets ... Cloak Room ... Help ... For Sale ... Board Discussion ... Subscribe!... Donate!... Advertise... COOKIE MONSTER!

×
×
  • Create New...