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Avalanche of bad news - F cancer among it

Brisketexan

By Brisketexan
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Brisketexan

Brisketexan 105,078

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Okay, reeling a little bit here.  In the past 24-36 hours:

 My wife has had to head to Houston to MD Anderson, to be with our friends who have been stationed overseas.  Their son (who became fast friends with my boy on our last visit) broke his femur a week ago or so.  While being surgically repaired, they found stuff in the bone that they didn’t like.  He was medevaced here.  We don’t have a full diagnosis yet (he goes in for an MRI in a couple of hours), but the signs seem to be pointing strongly towards osteosarcoma.  Needless to say, his parents are a wreck.  My wife is there to minister, and help hold them together.  I, on the other hand, have stayed behind to work, take care of our son, and fret without pausing.  Which is good, because…

 My children’s godfather, a firefighter, was rushed to emergency surgery last night here in Austin.  He ended up getting a triple bypass and having an aorta that was on the verge of failing repaired.  He’s in ICU, I’m awaiting enough details to let me know when I can go and help the family.  They are, of course, scared to death.  I truly don’t know if he’s out of the woods at all at this point, details remain sketchy.  AND….

 One of my dearest colleagues just had his adult daughter diagnosed with leukemia yesterday.  Treatment is starting immediately.  We’re still figuring out what we can do to help.  Again, here in town.

 There is so much worry, and fear.  And it’s goddamned heartbreaking, and seems overwhelming – I can only imagine how much more overwhelming it is to each of these families.  The world is a fickle, cruel place sometimes.  It reminds me that it’s that much more important to love each other and be there for each other.

 I’ll probably come back here with updates and details as they gel.  I am praying quite hard that those updates are good.  But meanwhile, I pray for strength, and perseverance, for those who need it.  And if anyone of you wants to add a prayer or positive vibes their way, I imagine it would be appreciated.

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jimmyjazz

jimmyjazz 45,891

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Well, that's a triple whammy of shit.  All my best to you, your family, and everyone who is dealing with this.

I spent the weekend in and out of St. David's visiting my MIL, who broke her hip Thursday night.  She's 82 and has Parkinson's.  I haven't said anything to my wife about my concerns, but damn if that doesn't sound like a recipe for a slow spiral down.  F life.

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Johnny Sack

Johnny Sack 8,397

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3 hours ago, Brisketexan said:

Okay, reeling a little bit here.  In the past 24-36 hours:

 My wife has had to head to Houston to MD Anderson, to be with our friends who have been stationed overseas.  Their son (who became fast friends with my boy on our last visit) broke his femur a week ago or so.  While being surgically repaired, they found stuff in the bone that they didn’t like.  He was medevaced here.  We don’t have a full diagnosis yet (he goes in for an MRI in a couple of hours), but the signs seem to be pointing strongly towards osteosarcoma.  Needless to say, his parents are a wreck.  My wife is there to minister, and help hold them together.  I, on the other hand, have stayed behind to work, take care of our son, and fret without pausing.  Which is good, because…

 My children’s godfather, a firefighter, was rushed to emergency surgery last night here in Austin.  He ended up getting a triple bypass and having an aorta that was on the verge of failing repaired.  He’s in ICU, I’m awaiting enough details to let me know when I can go and help the family.  They are, of course, scared to death.  I truly don’t know if he’s out of the woods at all at this point, details remain sketchy.  AND….

 One of my dearest colleagues just had his adult daughter diagnosed with leukemia yesterday.  Treatment is starting immediately.  We’re still figuring out what we can do to help.  Again, here in town.

 There is so much worry, and fear.  And it’s goddamned heartbreaking, and seems overwhelming – I can only imagine how much more overwhelming it is to each of these families.  The world is a fickle, cruel place sometimes.  It reminds me that it’s that much more important to love each other and be there for each other.

 I’ll probably come back here with updates and details as they gel.  I am praying quite hard that those updates are good.  But meanwhile, I pray for strength, and perseverance, for those who need it.  And if anyone of you wants to add a prayer or positive vibes their way, I imagine it would be appreciated.

My aunt — moms sister — died of an osteosarcoma when she was 20 years old back in the 70s.  She actually died in the same room Freddie Steinmark did. Of the same disease.  A few weeks after he died. 

That’s a bad diagnosis. But not always a death sentence these days.  A good friend of mine and fellow ut alum from the baseball team beat it.  He has a very slight limp but is otherwise fine. 

MD Anderson is where you want to be. 

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fuck cancer.

 

Sorry to hear the news.  Please do continue to share on the board.

 

There's a bit of therapy and salve for the soul in expressing it among friends    assholes.

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Brisketexan

Brisketexan 105,078

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Yeah...my wife does much better with this.  She's a born pastoral presence.  She's been down there all day, being a rock of calmness.  He's back in the MRI now.  I have no idea how long it takes to read the results.  As for me, I'm just terrified for them.  And we wait.

I'm getting ready to head to the hospital to visit my kids' godfather.  Word is that he's rested, and his vitals are good, and they already had him sitting up for a while.  The waiting room is full of family and fellow firefighters.  But I'll be one more person there.  Don't know what I bring to the table, but I'm gonna bring all the love that I can.

Lotta fucking hurt and fear out there.

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Capn81

Capn81 372

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Look on the positive side.  All of the people you mentioned have been diagnosed and have/will start treatment.  Information and news can be unfortunate but now they can get the best care available.  Yesterday they were just as sick and NOT getting treatment 


Great advice. I just had to give my stepdad the same kind of pep talk.
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Dances with Dachshunds

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Wow. Thoughts and prayers to you, your family, and those families hurting right now. May you be given strength to face anything , calm in the face of storm, and perseverance to weather whatever lies ahead. May the doctors' hands and minds be guided to provide the best outcome of healing. 

If you need us, we are here. 

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Brisketexan

Brisketexan 105,078

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Sheesh. Sitting in my car now, trying to keep it together.

Just left visiting my kids’ godfather. If he hadn’t gone to the hospital last night, he wouldn’t be here. He’s not out of the woods, but he’s progressing positively. His family is still scared shitless. And I didn’t bring much but some love, I ain’t so good at that. But I did it anyway.

His firefighter buddies brought the food. By the way, damned firefighters...they’re this diverse bunch of really fit, really good looking guys, and they’re all genuine, and nice. I bet they have a hard time getting dates.

As for our friends at MD Anderson, he went in for an MRI late today, no results yet. We’ll know more after tomorrow, when some pathology slides arrive from overseas. But it really, really doesn’t look good. They’re having sushi tonight because that’s what he wanted, and you give the boy what he wants.

I’m going to pick up my son right now. And I think I’m going to hug him and not let go for an uncomfortably long time. And I want my girl home from Germany right now. Instead, we’re not telling her about a lot of this, we don’t want her to have a lousy trip. But I really want to see her.

And again, this isn’t even my family. Just people who I love, and would do anything for to fix all this.

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bolverk

bolverk 29,656

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I'm running out words that don't sound like trite bullshit when our fellow members of this awesome community hit on hard times or have suffering loved ones. That doesn't change the fact that I feel for you and them. As you know, I'm not religious but I am sure that you and your wife's presence in visiting them is a real blessing. Hang in there, man. Y'all are doing God's work. 

Edited by bolverk
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Brisketexan

Brisketexan 105,078

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Re: our young friend at MD Anderson, a ray of hope, maybe?

The Tumor Board at MD Anderson met, and at least one of the doctors is not convinced that what they have is a cancerous tumor -- it may be benign.  I'm not sure what the next steps are, but I like having SOME ray of hopefulness.

And my son offered a "cold splash of water" different perspective to me last night.  As I hugged him, long and tight, he asked "okay, what happened?"  I told him that I am just really worried about our friend.  And he said, resolutely "well, he's at the best cancer hospital in the world.  Treatment gets better every day.  And even if they have to take his leg, prosthetics are amazing these days."  He was just so hopeful, and it didn't come across as naive.  It came across as thoughtful, and purposefully positive.  It was something I needed to hear, and I got it from a 15 year old boy who regularly forgets where he put his shoes.

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RDCanecutter

RDCanecutter 26,398

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On 6/19/2018 at 7:12 PM, Brisketexan said:

His firefighter buddies brought the food. By the way, damned firefighters...they’re this diverse bunch of really fit, really good looking guys, and they’re all genuine, and nice. I bet they have a hard time getting dates.
 

Just don't let it go farther than Greco-Roman wrestling. You have a family of your own who believe this straight male persona you have constructed.

Seriously, hope the Bad News Wagon is lightening up for all concerned.

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Brisketexan

Brisketexan 105,078

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1 minute ago, RDCanecutter said:

Just don't let it go farther than Greco-Roman wrestling. You have a family of your own who believe this straight male persona you have constructed.

Seriously, hope the Bad News Wagon is lightening up for all concerned.

If you wouldn't at least CONSIDER going gay for a firefighter, then you're lying.  Dudes are coolness personified.

And as of this morning, the news is still rays of hope -- not GOOD news, but maybe we'll get some good news.  There are signs that point to cancer, BUT, "the overall picture suggest this may be a benign process rather than cancer," per one of the docs.  More pathology review this week, then some bigger scans next week.

Meanwhile, he's just a scared kid.  With a painful broken leg.  WHATEVER the outcome is, he's got an unpleasant road in front of him for a while.  We're going to try to get back down there early next week, ideally with our son, so they can hang out and goof off, play some Xbox, what have you.  It'll help him to spend some time with a peer just being a boy.

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RDCanecutter

RDCanecutter 26,398

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Just now, Brisketexan said:

If you wouldn't at least CONSIDER going gay for a firefighter, then you're lying.  Dudes are coolness personified.

Well, I didn't know I had the firefighter option. I thought Reese's Pieces at summer camp were the most I could get. Classic negotiating mistake.

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capnamerca

capnamerca 571

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On 6/19/2018 at 7:12 PM, Brisketexan said:

His firefighter buddies brought the food. By the way, damned firefighters...they’re this diverse bunch of really fit, really good looking guys, and they’re all genuine, and nice. I bet they have a hard time getting dates.

I'll just chip in here and mention all the badass women that are Austin Firefighters, too. One of whom left my house to go visit him in the hospital, too - they were classmates in academy. Agree that recent news is promising.

(that's not snarky although I know it can read that way ... I share your admiration for all of our fire brethren.)

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Brisketexan

Brisketexan 105,078

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Well. Its osteosarcoma. He’s getting a port for chemo put in on Tuesday. I’m not sure of the rest of the treatment plan. Fucking sucks. I suspect we’ll know more in the coming days. Gonna try to get the boys together; he’s kinda here alone. That’s a downside to being an expat kid.

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Brisketexan

Brisketexan 105,078

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Okay, some updates that are good-ish:

Our firefighter friend has been released, and is at home.  That's very good news.  I don't know what his long-term path looks like yet, but we'll be checking in later this week.

And on the osteosarcoma front....I guess the news is relatively positive, after a cancer diagnosis.  It IS treatable, and the tumor appears to be confined to the leg where the original bone break happened.  So, the plan is 10 weeks of chemo, followed by leg surgery (and I don't know how brutal that will be -- honestly, we haven't wanted to ask), followed by another 20 weeks of chemo.  He's getting the port for chemo put in today, and then, off we go.  So, he'll be in Houston for over half a year getting treatment.

We're going to figure out what that looks like, how we can help, and how we can provide some companionship.  Because he's a 13 yr old expat kid, and he doesn't have a passel of friends his age hanging around.  Gotta make plans for the long-haul.

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Brisketexan

Brisketexan 105,078

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Well, we got to all get together this past week. We were down at a beach house in Surfside, and the whole family joined us for half the day.

 

Chemo has made him pretty tired, his hair is gone, and he’s looking really skinny. They came down to the beach for a while; he wasn’t up to getting in the water, so we caught critters in the surf and brought them up to him, joking about crabs and such. After a while, we went back in the house and played some games as a group. A few rounds of Telestrations, and we had his whole family laughing their asses off - all three of them. It was great.

 

We then headed into town for a fried shrimp dinner. We let the four kids all sit at a table together, and it was kinda cool. Our other friend’s son asked about his leg break, how it happened, etc, and he told - laughing - the whole story of emergency medical care in Armenia, getting shipped to London, the whole deal. And they just goofed off. He got some fried jalapeños and ate some shrimp (good, as the goal is to cram him with calories when possible). And the adults just talked and laughed as well. Our goal was to make it just a normal, fun day, which I think we accomplished. I think the boys all exchanged info to play some computer games together online, so hopefully they can do that.

 

We headed out to the parking lot, and kept shooting the shit. I asked how our car was doing (I drove one of our cars down there a few weeks ago to give to them - it takes months for their car to get shipped back from overseas, and they needed wheels). It’s fine, although of course they had to replace the battery the week I gave it to them. But it’s good to see it doing someone some good.

 

 

He is back in for another round of particularly brutal chemo today, which will keep him in the hospital for a few days again.

 

I don’t know what they’ll ultimately do with his leg. We know that amputation is a strong option, and I guess it’ll just be what it’ll be.

 

It broke my heart to see him wrung out like that, and to know that he’s just a few weeks down this road. But he had a good evening. He laughed and was with other kids, just being a kid. I don’t think we can help with the big stuff. But if we can help with some little stuff, that’s what we’ll keep doing.

 

I wanted to just wrap him up in my arms and squeeze him till he damn near broke. I don’t know why. I didn’t. But I wanted to.

 

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