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Posted
  On 2/14/2023 at 6:23 PM, Brisketexan said:

So, work with me here.....a fighter plane.....equipped with "Tactical Scissors*" on the front.  Just cut the strings between the balloon and payload -- balloon floats away, payload plummets in free fall right there, easy recovery.

* "Tactical Scissors" is a trademark of the Raytheon group, and cost $300 million per pair, because of special design and alloys and shit.

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Mohel Group Inc. have already created something similar that Israel uses to remove the top of the balloon.  Would it be Kosher for us to borrow it?

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Posted
  On 2/14/2023 at 11:58 PM, ABSR said:

Mohel Group Inc. have already created something similar that Israel uses to remove the top of the balloon.  Would it be Kosher for us to borrow it?

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It would have been, but I used their one pair to cut open a package of thick cut bacon the other day.  

Dammit man, this is why we can't have nice things! 

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Posted

https://www.washingtonpost.com/national-security/2023/02/14/china-spy-balloon-path-tracking-weather/

 

  Quote

By the time a Chinese spy balloon crossed into American airspace late last month, U.S. military and intelligence agencies had been tracking it for nearly a week, watching as it lifted off from its home base on Hainan Island near China’s south coast.

U.S. monitors watched as the balloon settled into a flight path that would appear to have taken it over the U.S. territory of Guam. But somewhere along that easterly route, the craft took an unexpected northern turn, according to several U.S. officials, who said that analysts are now examining the possibility that China didn’t intend to penetrate the American heartland with their airborne surveillance device.

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The balloon floated over Alaska’s Aleutian Islands thousands of miles away from Guam, then drifted over Canada, where it encountered strong winds that appear to have pushed the balloon south into the continental United States, the officials said, speaking on the condition of anonymity to describe sensitive intelligence. A U.S. fighter jet shot the balloon down off the coast of South Carolina on Feb. 4, a week after it crossed over Alaska.

This new account suggests that the ensuing international crisis that has ratcheted up tensions between Washington and Beijing may have been at least partly the result of a mistake.

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Meanwhile, the White House on Tuesday said that three other objects shot down over North America in the last week may have posed no national security threat, striking perhaps the clearest distinction yet between those flying anomalies and the suspected spy balloon. John Kirby, the National Security Council’s coordinator for strategic communications, told reporters that the U.S. intelligence community “will not dismiss as a possibility” that the three craft instead belonged to a commercial organization or research entity and were therefore “benign.”

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  Reveal hidden contents

 

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Posted
  On 2/15/2023 at 3:26 AM, Francisco 2.0 said:

https://www.washingtonpost.com/national-security/2023/02/14/china-spy-balloon-path-tracking-weather/

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

  Reveal hidden contents

 

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“China didn’t intend to penetrate the American heartland.” Holy shit that’s hilarious. 

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Posted
  On 2/14/2023 at 11:10 PM, Surly Bevo said:
On the potential "alien" objects.  My deal with that.  You are telling me that these things are sophisticated enough to travel and navigate through space/spacetime, or whatever to arrive at Earth, and enter our atmosphere in a controlled manner that prevents them from being incinerated. Then Captain Hiller takes it out with a janky old Murican bandit shot. 
 
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Due to the distance, when the exploration probe visited earth, we were cavemen. The signal was sent that the planet was harmless, so they just send the science division.

They finally get back 200,000 years later and run into:

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Posted
  On 2/15/2023 at 2:15 PM, GoPokes83 said:

So… Why not shoot them down when they fly over Guam?

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I don't know if you're being literal...but Guam is only 8 miles wide.  By the time you scramble a jet up there and get into a firing position...it's long since passed over Guam.  

If you likely mean why not shoot it down after they see it in Guam? I'm guessing maybe they wanted to see how this thing maneuvered?  Could have a jet from Guam follow it to Wake (within one-way range particularly if there's no mid-air antics).  From there another jet can follow from Wake to Midway.  Midway to Hawaii.  and so on.  Apparently, they were monitoring the comms and signals emitting from the balloon in addition to see how it ascended/descended/maneuvered.  I'm guessing you could probably get close enough to it to see if it emitted any nuclear profiles.  Plus collecting the debris just off the coast of South Carolina with awaiting near-port surface/sub-surface vessels and coast guard assets is a fuckton easier than grabbing something outta the North Pacific Gyre which is what, 20 times the size of the Continental U.S. with far more unpredictable currents and depths?  

 

Posted
  On 2/15/2023 at 2:32 PM, YGIFS said:
I don't know if you're being literal...but Guam is only 8 miles wide.  By the time you scramble a jet up there and get into a firing position...it's long since passed over Guam.  
If you likely mean why not shoot it down after they see it in Guam? I'm guessing maybe they wanted to see how this thing maneuvered?  Could have a jet from Guam follow it to Wake (within one-way range particularly if there's no mid-air antics).  From there another jet can follow from Wake to Midway.  Midway to Hawaii.  and so on.  Apparently, they were monitoring the comms and signals emitting from the balloon in addition to see how it ascended/descended/maneuvered.  I'm guessing you could probably get close enough to it to see if it emitted any nuclear profiles.  Plus collecting the debris just off the coast of South Carolina with awaiting near-port surface/sub-surface vessels and coast guard assets is a fuckton easier than grabbing something outta the North Pacific Gyre which is what, 20 times the size of the Continental U.S. with far more unpredictable currents and depths?  
 

I meant in territorial waters. Keep knocking them down and eventually they’ll get tired of sending them.
Posted

agreed, I think what you'll see from now on.  or at least, it is my hope.  Is send up a sortie, if it's basically giving off the same sigint/comms signatures, no radiation detected, get some hi-res photos and splash the bitch over the water.  Don't waste the fuel on salvaging the wreckage, it'll get swept in with that plastic flotsom in the Pacific.  We got enough sidewinders to take out a balloon a day for the next several years.  

Posted (edited)

I think I figured it out. We need to have our own attack balloons with razor blades and shit. Send them up to take out the Chinese Mylar imitation junk.

Edited by Bevo
Posted
  On 2/15/2023 at 2:32 PM, YGIFS said:

I don't know if you're being literal...but Guam is only 8 miles wide.  By the time you scramble a jet up there and get into a firing position...it's long since passed over Guam.  

If you likely mean why not shoot it down after they see it in Guam? I'm guessing maybe they wanted to see how this thing maneuvered?  Could have a jet from Guam follow it to Wake (within one-way range particularly if there's no mid-air antics).  From there another jet can follow from Wake to Midway.  Midway to Hawaii.  and so on.  Apparently, they were monitoring the comms and signals emitting from the balloon in addition to see how it ascended/descended/maneuvered.  I'm guessing you could probably get close enough to it to see if it emitted any nuclear profiles.  Plus collecting the debris just off the coast of South Carolina with awaiting near-port surface/sub-surface vessels and coast guard assets is a fuckton easier than grabbing something outta the North Pacific Gyre which is what, 20 times the size of the Continental U.S. with far more unpredictable currents and depths?  

 

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But would shooting it down make the island of Guam capsize?

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Posted

It's why you gotta hit it on the tall size.  Centrifugal motion and what-not.  Science, Bitch!

I think about Hank Johnson sometimes and remember that his district is adjacent to MTG's.  And I think, "What the fuck is in the water of North Georgia?"  And is the anthem of that region still that kid with the banjo on the swing?  Explains so much.  These are the people appropriating the money to my Department of Defense?  

Then again, 30 days ago I would have laughed at $25mm for balloon surveillance.  Now I think that's not enough.  

Also-these things are being found in the Stratosphere, 2 "levels" up.  Where the fuck is Space Force in all this?  Chance to come outta the gate hot and brand yo' shit.  And where are you guys?  Technical consulting to the new Star Trek series on theCW?  

Posted

So when a nation launches one of these balloons, is there ever a true intention to retrieve it when its “mission” is completed, or does the owner just say “Fuck it” and let it turn into someone else’s problem?  

Posted

What if this is just the most elaborate, over-the-top gender reveal ever, and when we shoot one down and it explodes in a blue cloud, some super-rich Chinese couple will be all over TikTok celebrating their impending baby boy with their friends?

Did y'all ever think of that?

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Posted

Can you even do that on TikTok in china? I thought theirs was regulated to educational shit, ours was meant to distract our kids during their formative years…

Posted
  On 2/15/2023 at 3:38 PM, Bevo said:

I think I figured it out. We need to have our own attack balloons with razor blades and shit. Send them up to take out the Chinese Mylar imitation junk.

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I've seen this movie, only the balloon has a net... And Michelle Pfeiffer and Robert DeNiro

It looks like this

f8ceac8c390a21e41622f72e686b3387.jpg

but I think we need to do better and fancier, because we are the USA

91DSADVnZdL.jpg

 

 

Posted

Distinct possibility that all these things are not necessarily China/foreign objects, and hopefully we aren’t shooting down every slow moving aerial object that’s unidentified.  
image.jpeg.063d934ee67bbc005b8fe12c2f124117.jpeg

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Posted
  On 2/15/2023 at 11:21 PM, Brisketexan said:

What if this is just the most elaborate, over-the-top gender reveal ever, and when we shoot one down and it explodes in a blue cloud, some super-rich Chinese couple will be all over TikTok celebrating their impending baby boy with their friends?

Did y'all ever think of that?

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If it blows up pink, we'll know that another poor Chinese girl was fed to the snow leopards.  

Posted

US Air Force U-2 pilots flexing and taking selfies with the Chinese balloon when they were checking it out.  Given the balloon was at 60,000 feet or so, and it looks kind of tiny here, wonder if they were at 70,000 feet or higher.

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Posted

https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/us/chinese-spy-balloon-gathered-intelligence-on-us-military-sites-nbc-news/ar-AA19pVLM

Video in link goes into more detail

 

  Quote

The high-altitude balloon, controlled by Beijing, was able to make multiple passes over some of the sites before it was shot down on Feb. 4, at times flying in a figure-eight formation, NBC said, citing two current senior U.S. officials and one former senior administration official.

The three officials said it could transmit the information it collected back to Beijing in real time, NBC reported.

"The intelligence China collected was mostly from electronic signals, which can be picked up from weapons systems or include communications from base personnel, rather than images," NBC cited the officials as saying.

Related video: Chinese spy balloon gathered intelligence from U.S. military sites, senior U.S. officials say (NBC News)
U.S. officials were not immediately available for comment. The Chinese Foreign Ministry in Beijing and the Chinese Embassy in Washington did not immediately respond to Reuters' request for comment.


At the time, U.S. officials played down the balloon's impact on national security.

The balloon, which Beijing denies was a government spy vessel, spent a week flying over the United States and Canada early in February before the U.S. military shot it down off the Atlantic Coast on President Joe Biden's orders.

The Chinese balloon incident prompted U.S. Secretary of State Antony Blinken to postpone a planned visit to Beijing and further strained relations between Washington and Beijing.

The episode caused an uproar in Washington and led the U.S. military to search the skies for other objects that were not being captured on radar.

The United States said on Feb. 17 it had successfully concluded recovery efforts off South Carolina to collect sensors and other debris from the suspected Chinese surveillance balloon and that investigators would analyze its "guts."

(Reporting by Doina Chiacu in Washington and Juby Babu in Bengaluru, Editing by Louise Heavens and Bernadette Baum)

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Posted (edited)

Surly assured me that our surveillance of the balloon gathered intimate details of its capabilities and that we knew exactly what information was being transmitted back to China.  Lol!   
“frequently wrong but never in doubt” should be our motto. 
 

I fear our military is far less Jason Bourne and far more Gomer Pyle than we’d like to believe. 

Edited by Lhorn
Posted
  On 4/3/2023 at 9:38 PM, Lhorn said:

Surly assured me that our surveillance of the balloon gathered intimate details of its capabilities and that we knew exactly what information was being transmitted back to China.  Lol!   
“frequently wrong but never in doubt” should be our motto. 
 

I fear our military is far less Jason Bourne and far more Gomer Pyle than we’d like to believe. 

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Do you even John Winger, bro?

28f57c45-54af-4f79-9e27-805ddf05bb4b-Bil

Posted
  On 2/23/2023 at 1:06 AM, PRONG HORN said:

No, that would mean that the pilot is about two miles away from the balloon in this pic.  

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Not if they were inverted, duh! 

So, to recap:

1.  China captured all of our most sensitive defense capabilities and nuclear weapon depots while the world laughed at us.

2.  China will use this information against us in warfighting.

3.  According to many news outlets and surly experts, tensions with China HAVE NEVER BEEN HIGHER!

4.  Somebody wake me for the impending multi-theater WWIII.  

 

Or it's possible it was just a really good few days for the U.S. Armed Forces and we got some toys from China off the coast of South Carolina, while we demonstrated to the world that we have weapons systems that can fly into the mid-Stratosphere and accurately fire ordnance on enemy devices.  Nothing below 15 miles above the Earth is safe.  Fun movie idea.

 

Posted
  On 4/3/2023 at 6:56 PM, Your Mom said:

Isn’t it just assumed that we are conducting as much surveillance on them as they are on us?

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  On 4/3/2023 at 9:38 PM, Lhorn said:

Surly assured me that our surveillance of the balloon gathered intimate details of its capabilities and that we knew exactly what information was being transmitted back to China.  Lol!   
“frequently wrong but never in doubt” should be our motto. 
I fear our military is far less Jason Bourne and far more Gomer Pyle than we’d like to believe. 

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China has satellites that can pick up signals.  China has spies who can park a car, buy a business or house near a lot of military installations and then scoop up lots of signals intelligence.  Military knows where it was going and they could turn off any Top Sekrut comm devices in advance.

Military is probably far more worried about the hiding-in-plain-sight dudes who have a house or business nearby and are scooping up signals intel for days/weeks/years on end.  Or spies in the factories or research centers.

Radio signals, how do they work?

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Posted
  On 4/4/2023 at 4:45 AM, Homercles said:

What about jet pack guy?  Could he be a spy too?

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Fair point.  What do we actually know about what that guy once he's dropped off the football and left the state?  What does he take with him?  

Posted
  On 4/3/2023 at 9:38 PM, Lhorn said:

I fear our military is far less Jason Bourne and far more Gomer Pyle than we’d like to believe. 

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We've got plenty of top secret shit to spy with. Just because you don't know about it doesn't mean we haven't actively been using them.

Sincerely, 

A guy that was actually in the military 

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Posted (edited)
  On 4/4/2023 at 7:50 PM, Schulz2.0 said:

We've got plenty of top secret shit to spy with. Just because you don't know about it doesn't mean we haven't actively been using them.

Sincerely, 

A guy that was actually in the military 

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I don’t doubt it at all.  I never implied otherwise.  If you think so, show me where.
What I am suggesting is that while one portion of our military or most of our military might be completely on the ball, there might be other areas where we are stepping on our own dicks.  I missed most of the discussion about the balloon.  I’ve heard it suggested that we’re completely on top of the situation the whole time.  Knew exactly what the balloon’s capabilities were and knew exactly what information they acquired with the balloon- in real time.  The latest reports are “we don’t think they learned a whole lot” and that determination was made after the fact, not in real time.  
if we are incapable of tremendous lapses in our national security then how did the balloon, multiple balloons get to our airspace?  Could we pull that off with China or Russia?  I’m asking because I don’t know the answer but would guess that radar would pick it up.  If one were to say that ballon’s fly too high for radar to detect, then why are we surprised by this.   There are likely hundreds up there now.  
I’m certainly not saying they acquired vital information but I don’t think we need to make it easy for them by letting surveillance balloons traverse the entire country unimpeded. 

By the way, I hope and pray that whatever surveillance they are doing, we are doing 10 fold.  

Edited by Lhorn
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