Jurassic World Fallen Kingdom

[hobbes2702 13052]

4 minutes ago, pied06 said:

 

 

Wuld appreciate if you could just cut to the chase and tell us what you really think.

It’s funny the first thing I did last night when we got home was look for a thread but when there was nothing on the first page I figured no one cared enough.

[mchookem 16361]

okay then lol

 

[Underdog 28765]

Does Red show her tits?  

[Stringer 1439]

It’s funny the first thing I did last night when we got home was look for a thread but when there was nothing on the first page I figured no one cared enough.

Seeing that the Dominion talk is just a continuation of a thread from a four year old movie, I think your instinct was correct.

[Tom 2959]

It's probably going to be awful but I'm still going to go see it this weekend.

[Enchubben 5510]

My kid loved it because it had dinosaurs eating people and attacking other dinosaurs. It served it’s purpose and well; go see it because it’s the last of the series, not because of expected award winning acting.  It’s a movie about dinosaurs for fucks sake. 

[ATexanAbroad 627]

movie fucking sucked worse than top gun 2

[The Ace of Aces 5193]

Went tonight.  Might be the worst movie I’ve ever seen in a theater. 

[Murfdogg21 4422]

How do they fuck up a Jurassic Park movie with dinosaurs, Alan Grant, Star Lord, and Goldblum? You’d think they could mad libs a decent plot out of that combo. 

[Yev Kassem 1031]

Y’all are a fucking beating. It’s a fucking movie about dinosaurs. It’s not supposed to be The Godfather. The chase scene with the Atroraptors was great and the tie-ins with the original and current cast were fun. Goldblum was hysterical. 

Most of you would complain about an Alexandra Daddario sex video because it was shot with poor lighting. 

Edited June 11, 2022 by Yev Kassem

[utxmike05 1828]

Dinosaur overload. Kid in me loved it. But we just kinda jump into this era of dinos living amongst as the norm. It was awkward.  It's what I expected. Definitely not the worst of the series.  Cool throwback character and special item from the original.  Didnt feel like much closure on the series. 
 

I can still watch the original over and over. 

[Hermanator 7129]

It was the most generic thing I could have imagined. It was basically the type of movie The Rock stars in just with dinosaurs. Plot made no sense.

Is there something wrong cognitively with Sam Neill? He acted very stiff and awkward almost like a person with neurological issues. Can't tell if that was intentional or involuntary

 

Edited June 11, 2022 by Hermanator

[utxmike05 1828]

8 hours ago, hobbes2702 said:

It’s easily one of the worst movies I’ve ever seen. Kid wanted to see it so we went last night. After an hour I took my phone out to see how long the movie was and realized I had to sit through another hour and half. 
Chris Pratt had about the worst acting performance I’ve seen in a major movie and he only spoke like 10 lines the whole movie. Goldblum was clearly cashing a check. There’s no discernible plot and it’s basically just a Dino fight scene once every ten minutes or so.

As we were leaving my first comment was that it was the worst movie I’ve ever seen.

OMG they forgot to produce an oscar nominee!  And too many dino fights!! What is this? Jurassic Park?? 

[Red Five 40880]

15 hours ago, Underdog said:

Does Red show her tits?  

I normally get them confused, but I'm pretty sure this one is Bryce Dallas Chastain right? 

[South Austin 52558]

11 hours ago, Yev Kassem said:

Most of you would complain about an Alexandra Daddario sex video because it was shot with poor lighting. 

That’s actually a legit complaint.

[futureman 22519]

19 hours ago, utxmike05 said:

OMG they forgot to produce an oscar nominee!  And too many dino fights!! What is this? Jurassic Park?? 

it’s absolutely not jurassic park you thick fuck. jurassic park was a masterpiece. this is jurassic world and it sucks harder than your wife. 

[ATexanAbroad 627]

19 hours ago, utxmike05 said:

OMG they forgot to produce an oscar nominee!  And too many dino fights!! What is this? Jurassic Park?? 

youre somehow more fucking stupid than your profile picture.

[mchookem 16361]

fwiw the gap b/t critic and audience score has grown (up to 85%). i imagine it will be fun 🙂

[ATexanAbroad 627]

3 minutes ago, mchookem said:

fwiw the gap b/t critic and audience score has grown (up to 85%). i imagine it will be fun 🙂

if you have half a brain, youre going to sit there for 2+ hours saying to yourself....what the fuck did I get myself into. Then again, people are lapping up TopGun2 so it isnt like hollywood doesnt know how to give you a baisc shit product and take your money while you smile. 

Edited June 12, 2022 by ATexanAbroad

[mchookem 16361]

[Herpa Derpa 6127]

20 hours ago, Yev Kassem said:

Most of you would complain about an Alexandra Daddario sex video because it was shot with poor lighting. 

We talking standard porn poor lighting or Game of Thrones poor lighting? Cuz if it's the latter, then fuck yeah I'm gonna complain.

[utxmike05 1828]

1 hour ago, ATexanAbroad said:

youre somehow more fucking stupid than your profile picture.

Lol. It's a dino movie. Go hang out in the Oscar threads. And that's my late dog in my pic, mfer. Fuck you. What are you 12 with a babe in bikini profile pic?

[ATexanAbroad 627]

3 minutes ago, utxmike05 said:

Lol. It's a dino movie. Go hang out in the Oscar threads. And that's my late dog in my pic, mfer. Fuck you. What are you 12 with a babe in bikini profile pic?

Yes, I am 12 years old.

[mdmost 43016]

Did Pratt teach the dinos how to ride a motorbike yet?

[henrygandorf 29194]

jurassic park thread seems to have brought out everyone's inner 12 year old.

[Sam Lin 3560]

I chuckled a bit when they showed NowThis news. Thanks Surly.

Movie was well produced, the plot was just a hot mess/dumpster fire that had plenty of potential but all of it left untouched, and most of the acting was mailed-in. None of the plot made sense.

[mchookem 16361]

9 hours ago, Sam Lin said:

Movie was well produced, the plot was just a hot mess/dumpster fire that had plenty of potential but all of it left untouched, and most of the acting was mailed-in. None of the plot made sense.

pretty close to what i'd say...silly plot, lots of things made no sense, but dinos were fun, still several 'jump' moments that worked, a few chuckles here and there, a couple of fun callbacks to the original. audience seemed to love it.

i think the 'mailing it in' really stands out bc we know every single one of these actors is capable of so much more, we expect better. i got the sense (especially from Goldblum) that they were bored and thought the whole thing was silly. they weren't wrong 😁 but I imagine they all got pretty nice paychecks.

i've seen worse 🦕🦖😜

i was thinking it would have been much more interesting to follow Malcolm's thought from earlier in the film...humans have no more right to safety and security than any other animal, deal with it. and we even brought these guys back lol. obviously would have been a much darker film...Jurassic Park: Apocalypse 😄

[LTbear 4171]

Didn't expect much, had fun. Nowhere near as good as Jurassic Park, obviously, but better than the last sequel. Nostalgia hits were nice. Also enjoyed it much more having not watched any trailers (but did watch the prologue, which was awesome). 

[Tom 2959]

I think I have to side more with the critics than the audience score on this one.  

I actually liked Jurassic World pretty well, but these two follow-ups were phoned in.  With everyone returning, I had hopes this would be better than Fallen Kingdom, but it wasn't.  Feels like the only thought that went into it was "how many dino fights can we fit into a two-hour movie, and how many previous characters can we shoehorn in?"  I'm kind of surprised William H. Macy and Tea Leoni didn't show up in the third act.

[Sam Lin 3560]

Spoiler

Oh so many questions:

 

Break in to this monster illegal dino breeding facility with clearly fairly expensive cage and assets, yet not even basic security?

How do those cages open to let the dino out? The ring of metal clearly was shaped around the neck and the head grew into it.

Why is dino breeding/smuggling a thing? We see at the end that dinos are hanging out at the park, at people's back yards, all over the place. Just go catch or shoot your own!

Old friends are all over upper echelons of govt but govt is either powerless against Biosyn or is completely partnered with Biosyn and tacitly supporting them? There is not one other whistleblower in the world?

Grant is this dino legend, yet still digs in the desert to pay bills?

Purebred raptors that target fixate based on a laser. How? Visual recognition? Recognition of what? Does a clothing change fool them? Can't be smell given the environments and distances where we saw it work. Do they get confused and kill everyone in a dance club with laser light show? Do identical twins both die?

Why is Biosyn taking in all these sanctuary dinos from the govt? If they already have samples of all the dinos for their genetic research, what use is it to have more? That's just more mouths to feed for no new genetic property. If it's just for the lucrative govt contract, why are they not just flying them out and dumping them in the ocean? That should be an easy coverup given how much else they apparently easily cover up. Or sell them into the underground smuggling, double your money! Again, you apparently can cover anything up, so why not?

Malta is this hotbed of illegal dino trading (the secret trading room is one of the coolest scenes btw - there was so much more that could have been developed in this plot direction), and everyone just looks the other way/there are no other sleeper agents in there?

When the fight/chase happens in there, everyone else just nonchalantly goes on with their business, even when large carnivores escape and start eating people. Apparently this is just a normal day at the office for a dino smuggler. At least have some urgency to protect your own dinos from being eaten/burnt! Those are your business assets!

Blonde villain plot line just vanishes after her scene. Plot line of a massive global supercriminal with connections seemingly everywhere and super laser dino assassin tech. Right.

Massive housecat-sized locusts eating everything except Biosyn crop, but no one asks any questions or connects the dots except for Ellie?

Biosyn can't do what Monsanto is already doing? Make crop that simply outpollinates and outreproduces all other strains of crop so after a few generations, only Biosyn crop survives out in the wild? Then go around and sample the crops of farmers that don't plant Biosyn, and when you find Biosyn DNA in their crop, you sue the farmer to force them to either pay or give up your intellectual property?

Biosyn's "containment and destruction" procedure dumps flaming live bugs and live DNA out all over the valley? I'm not sure they understand how a full decontamination system works... Any of those flaming chunks would give equally incriminating DNA match.

Why are different samples/ages of locust kept in separate little grain patches? What keeps them from hopping over to the next patch and totally mixing up your specimens? The later swarm scene shows they clearly are free to mix in that room. So why do Grant/Saddler need to go down the room to pick a specific sample? The first locust in the first grain patch should have given an equally usable DNA sample.

The entry/exit airlock decon. Again Biosyn appears to totally not understand biocontainment. All it does is blow the locusts around for a while until they get tired? You can target biosystems to where they won't eat your crops but you can't target a biotoxin that instantly kills only your superlocusts?

Ramsey can whistleblow to Malcolm but can't whistleblow to anyone else? And he can't get a DNA sample himself? Or, with his level of access, he can't just whistleblow a data dump out to the news/govt/Ellie?

Ramsey has to wait until someone gets to the tunnel gate before he can unlock it? Why not just leave it unlocked?

Their security camera directional mics can follow a single conversation across the room yet get fooled by a coffee machine steamer? That's not how directionality works.

Crazy doctor needs girl's DNA to see how it was spliced. But he's been splicing various dino DNA with various random other animals since the first movie - he's supposed to be the top genetic splicing guy in the world!

Why does this require kidnapping the girl? Stray hair left on a hairbrush can provide a DNA sample.

Why does this require taking Beta, Blue's baby? Again, take a blood sample and gtfo. And this supergeneticist doesn't know about the other currently living species who are able to reproduce asexually? Only this DNA will answer the question?

Girl goes in to town apparently frequently. Entire town keeps a secret about an odd girl who comes out of the forest?

Malcolm can literally destroy the entire organization via security breach, and just politely be asked to leave?

Why does Malcolm need that level of access anyways? He's a guest lecturer!

Why does Biosyn even keep him around if all his lectures are warning against Biosyn behavior?

Holding out the hand to stop and calm a dino is apparently some behavior that Biosyn has programmed to be understood by all dinos. How else does it work on fucking everything??

Evil villain guy early on instantly gets flaky behavior and absentminded when denied his scooby snacks, and every other scene shows he needs to constantly snack. So much potential there to delve into some sort of bioenhancement and how he needs constant supply of some chemical to function and how he's an engineered super-being. Instead we get nothing, just that he's this stereotypical megalomaniac that really has zero perception of his own actions and will do anything for greed and company success. Just another Hammond minus the soul searching at the end.

Hyperloop tunnels clearly connect into dinosaur tunnels, we see the humans exit into dino tunnel and we see dinos in the hyperloop tunnel. Why and how? Hyperloop if based on Musk concept is an air suspension and propulsion - you need a good fitting tunnel wall to do this, not random openings out into the dino tunnels. And if it is a conventional tram, how is it safe if random dinos can wander into your tracks at any time? And why are there lit control panels all the way down the tunnel? That's just a pile of extra cost.

That and: early on we are told the Biosyn sanctuary is human safe because there are underground tunnels the humans can use to commute and evacuate. But then later we see the tunnels are not safe.

Big dino 2 and 3 somehow team up to kill big dino 1 at the end, and then leave each other alone, so they will now co-lead the food chain. Yeah, that's not how nature works.

 

So many questions.

Spoiler warning.

[Jersey Man10 3538]

Jesus H. Christ.

[Hermanator 7129]

Would have been way better if they just dropped everything about the teen girl and baby raptor and worthless villan and made it a Dino smuggling/sex trafficking crime thriller with fighting dinosaurs. 

My favorite part of the movie was the end. Mainly because it meant I got to leave but also because it had the hilariously cheesy scene where Chris Pratt and a killer raptor have a moment where they both do this

[Jersey Man10 3538]

Dude I completely forgot about that little girl I had no idea who the fuck she was. I just remembered that giant trex raptor dinosaur and that’s it and that dude on a bike hunting with raptors.

[Mitch Cumsteen 18550]

Saw this today. Now, it's not like I'm expecting some complex character driven drama with jaw dropping acting performances here, but holy fuck that is some of the laziest film making and writing I've ever seen. It's like they got half way through making the movie and just said "Fuck it.... all bets are off.  We aren't even going to try anymore. Let's just figure out what kind of cool cgi dinosaur shit we can get away with and call it a day on this whole pesky plot thing or even pretending that anything in this movie makes any sense." I mean, Chris Pratt fell through the ice on top of a lake and got out not even acknowledging that it was even cold and the next scene he was in a tropical jungle. It just got worse and worse and made less and less sense as it went on. Saying this movie had plot holes is an insult to plot holes. It had plot canyons. Terrible, awful lazy filmmaking. 

But somehow I didn't completely hate it because of dinosaurs doing dinosaur things.

[kilroydos 267]

1 hour ago, Mitch Cumsteen said:

Saw this today. Now, it's not like I'm expecting some complex character driven drama with jaw dropping acting performances here, but holy fuck that is some of the laziest film making and writing I've ever seen. It's like they got half way through making the movie and just said "Fuck it.... all bets are off.  We aren't even going to try anymore. Let's just figure out what kind of cool cgi dinosaur shit we can get away with and call it a day on this whole pesky plot thing or even pretending that anything in this movie makes any sense." I mean, Chris Pratt fell through the ice on top of a lake and got out not even acknowledging that it was even cold and the next scene he was in a tropical jungle. It just got worse and worse and made less and less sense as it went on. Saying this movie had plot holes is an insult to plot holes. It had plot canyons. Terrible, awful lazy filmmaking. 

But somehow I didn't completely hate it because of dinosaurs doing dinosaur things.

I can safely and happily live one thousand more years before seeing someone hold up their hand to calm/stop a vicious animal again.

[Herpa Derpa 6127]

5 hours ago, kilroydos said:

I can safely and happily live one thousand more years before seeing someone hold up their hand to calm/stop a vicious animal again.

Good luck with that. It's a Hollywood classic.

[BHMCruiser 1814]

This movie fucking sucked. It's the worst movie I have seen in a theater since my idiotic mother-in-law made us all watch Bridget Jones' Diary in 2001 or whatever.

To paraphrase Andy Richter's old line, this was like being taken on a three mile hike to look at a dog turd.

[Viper 12111]

Are we doing spoilers? does anyone care still?

Spoiler

Some things I didn't get:

Why do they need to do all this illegal stuff at all? Why kidnap the girl? Can't they just offer her a large reoccurring payment to study her dna? Offer to pay for her college, and have a job waiting for her. She's the clone of the most brilliant geneticists ever, seems like it would be a great investment.

why did they create the locusts in the first place? if some genetic study, why use one of the biblical plagues and not some other, more benign bug? Why not have a kill switch or prevent them from reproducing like they did in original Jurassic Park? Was there a plot to force everyone to use biosyn crops? wouldn't that lead to a lot of investigations into them?

Did Alan Grant always have a Irish accent? Seemed really strong in the beginning and then faded after a few scenes. Was Sam Neill just rusty and they didn't want to wait for him to get back into character?

Why are the older trio all wearing the same outfits from the first movie? Malcom I can kid of see keeping the black motif, but Sattler and Grant are wearing the exact same outfits.

 

[BHMCruiser 1814]

Spoiler

Because the movie fucking sucked.

 

[Underdog 28765]

Had every intention of seeing this but you guys have convinced me not to waste my time, you make The Meg sound like a masterpiece.  

[MonkeyDoughnut 10346]

[BHMCruiser 1814]

1 hour ago, Underdog said:

Had every intention of seeing this but you guys have convinced me not to waste my time, you make The Meg sound like a masterpiece.  

I actually thought about the Meg this morning and the Meg was way better because it was in on the joke. This movie is just trash. 

[RomaVicta 29966]

On 6/10/2022 at 4:35 PM, hobbes2702 said:

It’s easily one of the worst movies I’ve ever seen. Kid wanted to see it so we went last night. After an hour I took my phone out to see how long the movie was and realized I had to sit through another hour and half. 
Chris Pratt had about the worst acting performance I’ve seen in a major movie and he only spoke like 10 lines the whole movie. Goldblum was clearly cashing a check. There’s no discernible plot and it’s basically just a Dino fight scene once every ten minutes or so.

As we were leaving my first comment was that it was the worst movie I’ve ever seen.

That is so close to how I felt watching No Time to Die. The dreaded running length. Action sequences on cue. A barely serviceable plot. Awful.

Thanks for killing the only few molecules in me that were considering giving this other tired franchise a look.

I'll just have to wait a year for a new Spiderman and then another for a new Batman beginning.

The studios are shit.

[GreenspointTexas 9662]

Saw it yesterday. Easily the worst movie i have seen in theatres in maybe 5-10 years. And i see about 20 movies a year in theatres. 
 

everything has already been said, but ill add that the villain of this movie was so bad, i literally laughed out loud at some of the more “serious” parts of the film. I just dont see how someone can defend this movie… unless you are 9 years old or have never seen a movie before

[Hermanator 7129]

35 minutes ago, GreenspointTexas said:

Saw it yesterday. Easily the worst movie i have seen in theatres in maybe 5-10 years. And i see about 20 movies a year in theatres. 
 

everything has already been said, but ill add that the villain of this movie was so bad, i literally laughed out loud at some of the more “serious” parts of the film. I just dont see how someone can defend this movie… unless you are 9 years old or have never seen a movie before

When he's throwing the toddler tantrum hitting the desk and the people working for him are doing the "wtf" guy face. 

I laughed

[Trey3216 15352]

On 6/20/2022 at 11:08 AM, Viper said:

Are we doing spoilers? does anyone care still?

  Hide contents

Some things I didn't get:

Why do they need to do all this illegal stuff at all? Why kidnap the girl? Can't they just offer her a large reoccurring payment to study her dna? Offer to pay for her college, and have a job waiting for her. She's the clone of the most brilliant geneticists ever, seems like it would be a great investment.

why did they create the locusts in the first place? if some genetic study, why use one of the biblical plagues and not some other, more benign bug? Why not have a kill switch or prevent them from reproducing like they did in original Jurassic Park? Was there a plot to force everyone to use biosyn crops? wouldn't that lead to a lot of investigations into them?

Did Alan Grant always have a Irish accent? Seemed really strong in the beginning and then faded after a few scenes. Was Sam Neill just rusty and they didn't want to wait for him to get back into character?

Why are the older trio all wearing the same outfits from the first movie? Malcom I can kid of see keeping the black motif, but Sattler and Grant are wearing the exact same outfits.

 

Well, that's not the exact same outfit.  But it goes along with the bulk of the complaints.  Plus, scientists are pretty dull folks.  They have a look they like and they rarely stray from it.  

[Trey3216 15352]

2 hours ago, GreenspointTexas said:

Saw it yesterday. Easily the worst movie i have seen in theatres in maybe 5-10 years. And i see about 20 movies a year in theatres. 
 

everything has already been said, but ill add that the villain of this movie was so bad, i literally laughed out loud at some of the more “serious” parts of the film. I just dont see how someone can defend this movie… unless you are 9 years old or have never seen a movie before

So you're saying if I go in and watch it as a comedy, like JFK should be watched, it'll be much more entertaining?? 

[Sam Lin 3560]

10 hours ago, Hermanator said:

When he's throwing the toddler tantrum hitting the desk and the people working for him are doing the "wtf" guy face. 

I actually had a job where the owner did this. And we did look at each other with "wtf" faces.

[Viper 12111]

24 minutes ago, Sam Lin said:

I actually had a job where the owner did this. And we did look at each other with "wtf" faces.

Must have sucked working for Tom Herman

[52-80 19223]

Jurassic World Fallen Franchise