2023 Houston Astros Thread

[Gut Wagon 8065]

20 minutes ago, WBT said:

This thread has sure swung wildly based on one win.  We're sweeping now?  I'd cut your arm off to split the next two with Seattle.

Make that Maton's right arm and we just might get the split. 

[tx 3 putt 76906]

Go team 

Edited September 26, 2023 by tx 3 putt

[Seasick Sailor 3747]

1 hour ago, Rockethorn1978 said:

Haha it’s what we do. Win one and we’re going to the WS.

It's time to admit that we are all in an abusive relationship with the 2023 Houston Astros. Sure they've spent the last two weeks on a bender beating the shit out of us every night, but they brought home flowers last night, so they've clearly changed. Plus, how would we get by without them?

Edited September 26, 2023 by Seasick Sailor

[Rockethorn1978 6077]

7 minutes ago, Seasick Sailor said:

It's time to admit that we are all in an abusive relationship with the 2023 Houston Astros. Sure they've spent the last two weeks on a bender beating the shit out of us every night, but they brought home flowers last night, so they've clearly changed. Plus, how would we get by without them?

Perfect analogy. “He didn’t mean it when he hit me”.

[Js1 85313]

He’s changed. I promise! 

[Dutchrudder 11137]

Just win baby...  As an added bonus, it would be great to crush the Mariners souls for a second season in a row. 

[kevwun 15774]

Make it 2 in a row and I might get my hopes up.

[APMP 688]

If we can't win the division, I'd rather stay right where we are and play Minnesota instead of the Rays.  If we beat Minnesota, then we'd open the ALDS at the Rangers on October 7.  If that was a night game, that would make for a helluva day in Dallas.  There would be a game on Sunday at the Rangers too, and Monday is a holiday.

This is the recipe for an epic Surly post.

[Ojo Rojo 1963]

5 hours ago, tx 3 putt said:

 

No human liver could survive that day

[Halohal 498]

Go Astros 

[UTexasFight 9431]

 

I guess Brantley’s dead again. Assuming so, here is our playoff lineup 

Edited September 26, 2023 by UTexasFight

[CycleTex87 2967]

Brantley’s shoulder has fallen off after a dozen at bats.  

[Chuckie Finster 22694]

The refusal to put an obviously finished Brantley on the injured list and intentionally shortening our bench is as close as you can get to a true "fired for cause: incompetence" scenario for the GM.

Edited September 26, 2023 by Chuckie Finster

[Rip76 4925]

Website says 9:05

TV says 8:30??

[CycleTex87 2967]

9:05

[Guadaloopy 10960]

Y’all bring it home, fellas.  Boarding a flight to Spain.  Hope the boys are still playing when I get home in a couple of weeks.  

[Hank Chinaski 6314]

27 minutes ago, Chuckie Finster said:

The refusal to put an obviously finished Brantley on the injured list and intentionally shortening our bench is as close as you can get to a true "fired for cause: incompetence" scenario for the GM.

We’ve been operating as a dumb organization, top to bottom, since the ‘22 WS ended. 

Edited September 26, 2023 by Hank Chinaski

[TonyTexas 10510]

1 hour ago, UTexasFight said:

I guess Brantley’s dead again. Assuming so, here is our playoff lineup 

 

53 minutes ago, Chuckie Finster said:

The refusal to put an obviously finished Brantley on the injured list and intentionally shortening our bench is as close as you can get to a true "fired for cause: incompetence" scenario for the GM.

 

1 hour ago, CycleTex87 said:

Brantley’s shoulder has fallen off after a dozen at bats.  

 

[Chuckie Finster 22694]

2 minutes ago, TonyTexas said:

 

 

 

[Wulaw Horn 19069]

3 hours ago, Seasick Sailor said:

It's time to admit that we are all in an abusive relationship with the 2023 Houston Astros. Sure they've spent the last two weeks on a bender beating the shit out of us every night, but they brought home flowers last night, so they've clearly changed. Plus, how would we get by without them?

This was literally the last 5 minutes of my podcast. It made my co host very uncomfortable. 

[Wulaw Horn 19069]

10 minutes ago, TonyTexas said:

 

 

 

The training staff said he was ready to go today. So Dusty said we had to wait for tomorrow because that’s his rule, 1 extra day. Even if there are only 5 games left in the season. 
a man has to have a code. 

[TexArcher 37774]

11 minutes ago, Wulaw Horn said:

a man has to have a code. 

Oh, indeed.

 

[dr99 560]

 

R.I.P. 

Edited September 27, 2023 by dr99

[Fudge Nuggets 19190]

Taylor Clarke for the Royals has three saves against the Astros. Tonight on seven pitches he’s given up back-to-back massive homers and a rocket caught at the wall in the deepest part of Comerica Park. 

[Dutchrudder 11137]

I like this late start time, I actually get to see the first few innings after the kids go to bed. Gotta win out from here on!  

[YChang 3443]

Let’s go Stros!!!

[TexArcher 37774]

1 hour ago, Fudge Nuggets said:

Taylor Clarke for the Royals has three saves against the Astros. Tonight on seven pitches he’s given up back-to-back massive homers and a rocket caught at the wall in the deepest part of Comerica Park. 

This vexes me.  I'm terribly vexed.

[Scraps 13561]

Booooooo

Shut up fucktards

[Dutchrudder 11137]

NIce hustle play there by Altuve to get on!  Let's GOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

[tx 3 putt 76906]

We need King Tuck 

[Dutchrudder 11137]

Another lucky bounce there to only get 1 out. Need a couple runs here to start the avalanche

[Honeysucklerose 987]

Come on Diaz. Don’t swing at everything.

[Rip76 4925]

Jeez

[YChang 3443]

Well that was not optimal

[David Dennison 18854]

That was a bad inning.

[YChang 3443]

Freaking Abreu

[Honeysucklerose 987]

Weak

[tx 3 putt 76906]

Unclutch City

[cabowabo 4484]

What the fuck are you swinging at Yanier?  He’s not throwing a strike at 0 - 2. 

[Scraps 13561]

Diaz looks like me on mlb the show

Fuck it swing at everything

[WBT 20562]

So how far out would he have gone?

[UTHornFan014 710]

1 minute ago, Honeysucklerose said:

Come on Diaz. Don’t swing at everything.

Narrator: He Swung at Everything 

[Dutchrudder 11137]

Well that went just about as well as you would expect...  the drought with RISP continues...

[Rip76 4925]

Disheartening 

[Gut Wagon 8065]

It's way too early in the game to be miffed about a weak effort on offense. But that's never stopped me before. 

[Scraps 13561]

Less raisin ball innings and more wheelbarrow nut innings

[Wulaw Horn 19069]

1 minute ago, Gut Wagon said:

It's way too early in the game to be miffed about a weak effort on offense. But that's never stopped me before. 

It’s not though. This guy is a stud. If you are gonna get him you have to do it early. He gonna settle down now. 

[UTHornFan014 710]

3 minutes ago, Wulaw Horn said:

It’s not though. This guy is a stud. If you are gonna get him you have to do it early. He gonna settle down now. 

No way he settles down! Maldy is on a hot streak of hitting and catching baseballs. 

[Scraps 13561]

Who names their kid July anyway

[Guadaloopy 10960]

5 minutes ago, Scraps said:

Less raisin ball innings and more wheelbarrow nut innings