2023 Houston Astros Thread

[The Earl of Texas 3,217]

On a completely unrelated note, a team that hits a grand slams wins 86% of the time. Which seems very low to me.

[elguapo 4,621]

[Mitch Hedberg 2,117]

What we learned today:

Chas is an everyday player as much as Bregman and Altuve and not playing him as such is managerial malpractice

The turnaround of Jose Abreu appears to be complete and here to stay. And just in time.

The turnaround of Christian Javier also appears to be real and either he can be fixed or the shopping list just got longer. 
 

Brantley is likely done.

The All Star break can not get here fast enough

Never underestimate the heart of a champion. (Thanks Rudy. It still applies to baseball too)

[cabowabo 4,692]

8 minutes ago, Wishbone said:

????

https://archive.totalfratmove.com/houston-astros-texas-rangers-fat-fan-ejected-f-the-rangers/

[Wishbone 4,965]

3 minutes ago, cabowabo said:

https://archive.totalfratmove.com/houston-astros-texas-rangers-fat-fan-ejected-f-the-rangers/

Thanks. Missed that, apparently.

[Scraps 13,821]

Thanks. Missed that, apparently.

Well yeah cause no one was an Astros fan til 2017 /helo

[Gut Wagon 8,227]

12 minutes ago, The Earl of Texas said:

On a completely unrelated note, a team that hits a grand slams wins 86% of the time. Which seems very low to me.

OTOH, what's the winning percentage for teams committing three errors in a road game? Must be below 86%. 

[Strat 151]

 

 

[Guadaloopy 11,144]

Next person who mentions trading Chas is getting pistol-whipped. 

[FartingDreamer 138]

Am I the only one that can't stand the sight of Altuve, Bregman or Tucker?  Something about each one of them just pisses me off.  

[David Dennison 19,581]

Just now, FartingDreamer said:

Am I the only one that can't stand the sight of Altuve, Bregman or Tucker?  Something about each one of them just pisses me off.  

Must be the championships.

[IDIOTsavant 8,690]

2 minutes ago, FartingDreamer said:

Am I the only one that can't stand the sight of Altuve, Bregman or Tucker?  Something about each one of them just pisses me off.  

Username suggests Rangers fan…

[FartingDreamer 138]

1 minute ago, David Dennison said:

Must be the championships.

Or the cheating.

Just now, IDIOTsavant said:

Username suggests Rangers fan…

I grew up (and have been) a lifelong Rangers fan. 

[HtownHorn 15,246]

7 minutes ago, Guadaloopy said:

Next person who mentions trading Chas is getting pistol-whipped. 

Yes, but can we trade Meyers, so Dusty is no longer conflicted?

[Welch 640]

Need to keep momentum into the break.

We followed up the 5-1 trip to Atlanta and Tampa with 3-8 against Philly/SF/Sea.  

Hoping for at least 4-2 for the rest of the week.

[David Dennison 19,581]

3 minutes ago, FartingDreamer said:

I grew up (and have been) a lifelong Rangers fan. 

I am so sorry.

[IDIOTsavant 8,690]

2 minutes ago, FartingDreamer said:

Or the cheating.

I grew up (and have been) a lifelong Rangers fan. 

Yeah, I have a feeling you accidentally clicked on the Astros thread instead of the thread of hate.  If this was intentional, and you intend to participate in this thread in a similar manner, I doubt it’s going to go the way you think.

[Gut Wagon 8,227]

If only there were a thread for expressing one's hatred in this rivalry. 

[FartingDreamer 138]

I had all three tabs open, I'm drunk and I couldn't tell which was which.  Like a colorblind man playing Where's Waldo...

[Rip76 5,024]

11 minutes ago, FartingDreamer said:

Am I the only one that can't stand the sight of Altuve, Bregman or Tucker?  Something about each one of them just pisses me off.  

They farting on your dreams man.

[tx 3 putt 78,919]

14 minutes ago, Guadaloopy said:

Next person who mentions trading Chas is getting pistol-whipped. 

[tx 3 putt 78,919]

need to finish strong before the all star break

[Huckleberry 34,851]

12 minutes ago, FartingDreamer said:

I had all three tabs open, I'm drunk and I couldn't tell which was which.  Like a colorblind man playing Where's Waldo...

Weird, I never even click on the Rangers thread. 

[TexArcher 39,080]

6 minutes ago, Huckleberry said:

Weird, I never even click on the Rangers thread. 

Yeah, but you're not a stupid dipshit, so.

[Scraps 13,821]

or the cheating.

Tucker wasn't even in the majors in 2017 dingleberry

[Evil Bill Obrien 3,534]

30 minutes ago, FartingDreamer said:

I grew up (and have been) a lifelong Rangers fan. 

Hey at least you have this statue outside Globe Life Barn in memory of making it to the World Series once...

[ChickenSandwich 10,003]

Co-op must be jelly over that statue 

[TexArcher 39,080]

NTTAWWT

[Strat 151]

WBC fatigue seems to continue. Hope Javy just needs the AS break, but dip in velocity on his fb is concerning.

Dana needs to find a starter and OFer/bat. A reliever would be icing but prob too much to ask for the Farm system. 

[The Earl of Texas 3,217]

50 minutes ago, FartingDreamer said:

Or the cheating.

The “my team’s cheating is OK but any one else is horrible” syndrome is funnier with some fan bases than others but someone who supported the 2010s Rangers whose whole team was juiced to the tits on HGH and roids supplied by their drug dealing all star center fielder has to be top of the list.

Not to be confused with their previous PED drug dealing all star shortstop.

Edited July 3, 2023 by The Earl of Texas

[Scraps 13,821]

Hey at least you have this statue outside Globe Life Barn in memory of making it to the World Series once...

Is that for making the WS or is that commemorating their minor league hazing?

[Storm the Field 5,367]

Glad to see King Tuck back to playing at an all-star level the last month or so. He was borderline awful in May, batting just .247 with an OPS under .700, and struck out (14) twice as many times as he walked (7).

Since then, he's been raking. .313/.900 in June and back to an even K/BB ratio.

The numbers get increasingly better if you look at the 15-day and 7-day trends.

[UTHornFan014 755]

16 minutes ago, Strat said:

WBC fatigue seems to continue. Hope Javy just needs the AS break, but dip in velocity on his fb is concerning.

Dana needs to find a starter and OFer/bat. A reliever would be icing but prob too much to ask for the Farm system. 

Or at least force Dusty to play Chas more than twice a week. The fact Meyers had about 50 more ABs than Chas coming into this game infuriates me. 

[tx 3 putt 78,919]

3 minutes ago, UTHornFan014 said:

Or at least force Dusty to play Chas more than twice a week. The fact Meyers had about 50 more ABs than Chas coming into this game infuriates me. 

 

he was on the IL for about 3 weeks 

[Rockethorn1978 6,206]

1 hour ago, FartingDreamer said:

Or the cheating.

I grew up (and have been) a lifelong Rangers fan. 

[Rockethorn1978 6,206]

Astros have a mash unit roster right now and we’re 3 games back from the rangers having the best season in 10 years. Lulzzzz. We even suck and still have a shot. 6 straight alcs, 4 WS and 2 titles and they’re still on the “cheating” shit. Hahahaha. Cheaters would have never made the playoffs the next season. Poor babies.

[dr99 566]

35 minutes ago, Storm the Field said:

Glad to see King Tuck back to playing at an all-star level the last month or so. He was borderline awful in May, batting just .247 with an OPS under .700, and struck out (14) twice as many times as he walked (7).

Since then, he's been raking. .313/.900 in June and back to an even K/BB ratio.

The numbers get increasingly better if you look at the 15-day and 7-day trends.

It's all about the gloves

[HtownHorn 15,246]

Really need a 5-1 homestand heading into the break.

[Guest]

2 minutes ago, HtownHorn said:

Really need a 5-1 homestand heading into the break.

Never Settle!!!

 I was thinking how nice it'd be with our squad getting family time/ rested up after going into the break on an 8 game win streak.

[tx ind 7,061]

55 minutes ago, The Earl of Texas said:

The “my team’s cheating is OK but any one else is horrible” syndrome is funnier with some fan bases than others but someone who supported the 2010s Rangers whose whole team was juiced to the tits on HGH and roids supplied by their drug dealing all star center fielder has to be top of the list.

Not to be confused with their previous PED drug dealing all star shortstop.

You say drugs?

[UTHornFan014 755]

53 minutes ago, tx 3 putt said:

 

he was on the IL for about 3 weeks 

And even if he wasn't he probably would have only gotten about 20-25 at bats during those 3 weeks... Because for some reason Dusty thinks he sucks even though his stats say otherwise

[ChickenSandwich 10,003]

Javi had a career high in innings last year and is on pace to break that this year. Probably just needs a rest more than anything. 

[henrygandorf 29,231]

could've been a real hangover game for us.  hopefully it's a hangover game for them now.

for texas to arrange their rotation (and lose a game to detroit in the process), then go 1-3 with losses vs blanco, dubin, and a shitty javier has got to sting.

get healthy, win games.  also if yainer can learn some plate discipline, he's gonna hit 30 bombs.  maybe he can work with bregs in the offseason.  the optimist in me says all these bench guys getting meaningful time will pay off later.  guess we'll see.

[henrygandorf 29,231]

nsiap. 

 

[The Dog 44,928]

[tx 3 putt 78,919]

This team is at about 55%. We need Yordan and urquidy back, in a very and way 

need to trade for another BP arm

probably going to 6 man rotation in august 

not sure if we get another bat, it’s going  to be a tough market 

[WBT 21,155]

4 hours ago, UTHornFan014 said:

Or at least force Dusty to play Chas more than twice a week. The fact Meyers had about 50 more ABs than Chas coming into this game infuriates me. 

Chas was out hurt

[tx 3 putt 78,919]

5 minutes ago, WBT said:

Chas was out hurt

dusty should have played with 8 so Jake wouldn’t get so many at bats 

[tx 3 putt 78,919]

5 minutes ago, WBT said:

Chas was out hurt

dusty should have played with 8 so Jake wouldn’t get so many at bats 

[Wulaw Horn 19,603]

21 minutes ago, WBT said:

Chas was out hurt

Sure. But he’s been back for 47 team games and has only appeared in 35 of them. Julks is getting more PT than Chas. Over the last 7 games Chas has sat twice and that’s not atypical.