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Posted

In other news, Patrick Mahome's brother Jackson was just unfairly arrested for sexual assault charges. Despite Jackson's multiple assaults being clearly caught on camera and witnessed by employees, his lawyer said that it didn't happen, and this reassured people who now know not to trust their own eyes. The so-called victim said the following: 

“He forcibly kissed me out of nowhere,” Vaughn said, “and I’m telling him, pushing him off saying ‘what are you doing?’ and then he proceeded to do it two more times where the last time I was pushing him off and I can see on the cameras that somebody was outside the office door and I was yelling for them to come help because he’s big and massive.”

Jackson was released on $100K bond and we pray that these unjust charges aren't affecting his mental health. Patrick's wife, (and everyone's favorite person) Brittany Mahomes, said the following about Jackson's haters, and this certainly isn't tone-deaf in any way.

"They are ignorant," Brittany, who is married to NFL star Patrick Mahomes, wrote in response. "He is a human just trying to live his life and find his way and until you walk a day in his shoes (which no one ever will) you have no right to say s—t about him 🙂. So it's best to just shut up."

This statement was very well received by Jackson's many fans, as well as people who condemn sexual violence against women, and swayed the vast majority of people who are always overreacting to his harmless, charming antics, like when he threw water on other fans, danced on a dead player's number or trashed a restaurant that rudely wouldn't serve his large, unannounced, late-night party.

Hang in there, Jackson. We love you!   

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Posted

Instant karma's gonna get you
Gonna knock you right on the head
You better get yourself together
Pretty soon you're gonna be dead

 

Couldn't have happened to a nicer person.   Dude's 15 minutes has been up for a while.

 

 

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Posted
1 hour ago, Helobious said:

3 felony charges. Will likely get double or triple the amount of prison time that Henry Riggs will for killing someone and their dog. Wild. 

Maybe he and Reid’s drunk son can share a cell. 

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Posted
3 minutes ago, 4th&Five said:

Maybe he and Reid’s drunk son can share a cell. 

Nah, its Kansas. All his lawyer has to do is point out that Jackson is a celebrity. At that point, establish that Jackson moved on her like a bitch, cite trump doctrine, and the case will be dismissed by lunch. 

Posted
please file this under "we all knew this would happen eventually"
and my lord. Mahomes needs to ditch the brother and the wife. talk about bad for your image. 
How? He has zero control over his brother and isn't his problem. He got a huge contract and has tons of endorsements. He isn't responsible for him and he will be just fine.
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Posted

He can cut him off and quit bringing him to every fucking home and road game. And he should tell his wife to stand down as a woman defending a woman abusing asshole is never a good look.

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Posted
1 hour ago, Texzilla58 said:

He can cut him off and quit bringing him to every fucking home and road game. And he should tell his wife to stand down as a woman defending a woman abusing asshole is never a good look.

They should cut him. He needs to be taught a lesson about who to marry. 

Posted
16 minutes ago, Napoleon said:

I’ve got a strong feeling that this is a shakedown for da’ monies. 

could be. but the dude has put himself in this position for it to happen. after the restaurant thing he should have stepped back. but he hasnt. so here we are. 

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Posted
43 minutes ago, 4th&Five said:

Or maybe Pat is just as big of a douche as his wife and brother. 

If he is he hides it extremely well. 

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Posted
15 hours ago, cabowabo said:

So this guy just hangs out in Kansas gravy training off of his famous brother.

Yes, and can't seem to sit down and shut the fuck up. Real mooch's all around the world are shaking their heads. 

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Posted
8 minutes ago, Uncle Nate said:

Pat should call  Jimmy and get some advice on how to deal with embarrassing little brothers.

 

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lol it's hitby's long lost father

Posted
5 hours ago, The Earl of Texas said:

We made a whole thread dedicated to this fucking idiot?!? 
Bill Murray Film GIF

We should all be ashamed and feel bad. 
I’ll choose to go out Dr. Gonzo style. 

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Posted
57 minutes ago, TexArcher said:

Never heard of Jackson Mahomes until this story.

And I give the same amount of shits about him now.

Hope the young lady is okay.

Lol she’s 40. 

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Posted
On 5/3/2023 at 2:37 PM, BurntOrange&White said:

Most surprising part is that it was a woman he assaulted

Yeah I’m more confused than Jackson.  This is his lawyer’s best case.  Just show all of his “dancing” videos and look at the jury and ask “Does this look like someone that would forcibly kiss a female?”

Posted
On 5/4/2023 at 12:53 PM, Uncle Nate said:

Pat should call  Jimmy and get some advice on how to deal with embarrassing little brothers.

 

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Used to drink that beer some....still have a full unopened can

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