Best Salsa: Your taste buds are fucked if you do not agree with these fine ladies.

[Enemy07 288]

 

[dcbc 14464]

Lol.  "I tasted no happiness in that jar."

[jimmyjazz 45877]

This hits close to home, because against my better judgment I tried this the other day, since the ingredients seemed legit and it contains no vinegar (which is unusual for a jarred pantry salsa).

It was incredibly uninteresting.  I wept.

[CooterBrown 18001]

This hits close to home, because against my better judgment I tried this the other day, since the ingredients seemed legit and it contains no vinegar (which is unusual for a jarred pantry salsa).
It was incredibly uninteresting.  I wept.

Boring out of the jar but good warmed up for huevos rancheros.

[Dewey 3286]

All of that hits close to home. When I moved back to central Texas from the border, I loaded up with salsa. When I finally ran out, I went to HEB and wept. First I was lazy and would buy various salsas and add serranos. That didn't work and just like old girl in that video said, I found a piquín plant and started making my own. Us gringos have really fucked up their cuisine. 

 

[jimmyjazz 45877]

9 minutes ago, CooterBrown said:

Boring out of the jar but good warmed up for huevos rancheros.

I figured I'd just amp it up with some serranos, but I'll try your angle, too.

[TwiceHorn 31431]

Kind of amusing that Pace ranked highest.

Get a rope!

If they'd used medium or hot probably would have been 10/10.

[dcbc 14464]

7 hours ago, TwiceHorn said:

Kind of amusing that Pace ranked highest.

Get a rope!

If they'd used medium or hot probably would have been 10/10.

And if they'd tried the Herdez Guacamole Salsa, they'd have finished the jar because, while it's not the best thing I've ever tasted, the main ingredient is crack.

[locodos 5387]

Serious question for you salsa peeps, Is Newman's own any good?  If not what jar salsa is the best of the worst?

[Neonmoon 38129]

Salsa is spicey. Any non spicy sauce they ranked low. 

[dcbc 14464]

4 minutes ago, locodos said:

Serious question for you salsa peeps, Is Newman's own any good?  If not what jar salsa is the best of the worst?

As grocery store fare goes, I remember thinking Julio's Habanero salsa wasn't half-bad.  But it's been a while.

[VABuckeye 2472]

7 hours ago, TwiceHorn said:

Kind of amusing that Pace ranked highest.

Get a rope!

If they'd used medium or hot probably would have been 10/10.

Pace didn't rank highest.  It was the habenero hot Tostitos.  Overall I agree with the ladies.  Store bought salsa is mostly no bueno.

[TwiceHorn 31431]

7 minutes ago, VABuckeye said:

Pace didn't rank highest.  It was the habenero hot Tostitos.  Overall I agree with the ladies.  Store bought salsa is mostly no bueno.

Ok, second, but they did the mild.  If they'd done medium or hot it probably would have stomped.

The reality is, though, that Americans are spice wimps and anything made for widespread consumption is going to be bland.

[VABuckeye 2472]

I agree with you about Americans and spice and about hot Pace salsa.  I think I've purchased just about every store bought salsa my groceries carry.  It's tough to find a good one.

[SydneyCarton 48051]

Fun premise. But yeah, like 4 of the ones they tried were Tostitos brand, a taco bell salsa verde (WTF) and pace and some other shit. 

What would be really good is a video if they tried some of the many craft salsas and the like we can find at HEB. Find me the best of the worst, ladies. 

 

Also, I love Pace. I'm sure it's youthful nostalgia, but that was the shit that went on my tortilla chips or doritos as snacks as a kid. 

Edited June 15, 2023 by SydneyCarton

[ztejas 43411]

40 minutes ago, TwiceHorn said:

The reality is, though, that Americans are spice wimps

Eh. Depends on who you're talking about and who you're comparing us to.

[Patricio Swayze 17058]

If the jar says “mild” or “medium”, it’s not salsa.

[Gene Parmesan 4002]

I just grab the pace hot and skip the craft salsas.  Not that I think pace is the best, but it's cheap and available and it's still solid.  I recently discovered how easy it is to make salsa.  I just always assumed it took a long time, but just roasting some tomatoes/peppers/onion/garlic and throwing it in a blender with some cilantro salt and lime will slam better than most store bought.  Plus you can actually make it hot, which is hard to find in store bought salsas.

['stache 21788]

Rick Bayless is white af, but this is my favorite grocery store salsa by a pretty healthy margin.

[Patricio Swayze 17058]

That says medium. Not salsa.

[gofuckyourself 8195]

Fresh salsa is about the easiest thing to experiment with and make in order to nail down your own preferred flavors.

Store bought, if you must, is Mark's Good Stuff at HEB.

Though I have read that Pace has done well since 2020 because of a surprising number of "perma-Covid" cases, where people can't taste shit.

[tigol 2395]

Just get the hot fresh stuff that HEB makes in the produce section if you don't want to blend it up yourself.  It freezes well, too.

[CooterBrown 18001]

Cheap AF and tasty.

[Da Fino 2772]

I enjoy that El Gallo squeeze stuff. The green is good on taco's in the morning and afternoon. 

[Teddyballgame 441]

My favorite is La Michoacana salsa molcajete. 

[Enemy07 288]

19 hours ago, jimmyjazz said:

This hits close to home, because against my better judgment I tried this the other day, since the ingredients seemed legit and it contains no vinegar (which is unusual for a jarred pantry salsa).

It was incredibly uninteresting.  I wept.

I tried all the HEB salsas.  All were below average. Would not recommend.

[DalTxHornFan 3097]

This stuff is pretty solid.  You can usually find it at HEB (when it's open).

[Enemy07 288]

8 hours ago, Gene Parmesan said:

I just grab the pace hot and skip the craft salsas.  Not that I think pace is the best, but it's cheap and available and it's still solid.  I recently discovered how easy it is to make salsa.  I just always assumed it took a long time, but just roasting some tomatoes/peppers/onion/garlic and throwing it in a blender with some cilantro salt and lime will slam better than most store bought.  Plus you can actually make it hot, which is hard to find in store bought salsas.

It is very easy. If you are still college lazy like I was, just throw 1 can of tomato sauce, 6-10 habaneros depending on your desired spice level, salt and garlic to your preference.  But if it's a party of 30+ people, I would prefer to just buy a bunch of bottled salsa. Cannot find any good bottled salsas at my HEB.

Edited June 15, 2023 by Enemy07

[dcbc 14464]

Alright, I'm making that lady's salsa recipe (the first one in the video description link).  Couldn't find habanero.  So I'm subbing jalapeno.  Wish me luck.  If it sucks then her opinion of Pace sucks.

['stache 21788]

Big fan of this too.

[Enemy07 288]

1 hour ago, dcbc said:

Alright, I'm making that lady's salsa recipe (the first one in the video description link).  Couldn't find habanero.  So I'm subbing jalapeno.  Wish me luck.  If it sucks then her opinion of Pace sucks.

Report back. Jalapenos might be alright if you like the flavor. I'm more of a habaneros fan.

[dcbc 14464]

Got it done. Very tasty and very hot. My initial reaction was Uma Thurman in the bathroom in Pulp Fiction.

[Enemy07 288]

That looks great. How long was the total make time?

[jimmyjazz 45877]

Yeah, I'd eat that.  Do you ship?

[dcbc 14464]

42 minutes ago, Enemy07 said:

That looks great. How long was the total make time?

If I wasn't a neophyte with getting whole roasted heads of garlic in the blender easily, maybe 30 minutes.  You're barely chopping anything.  12 minutes under the broiler with a flip in the middle.  Let it cool down a little.  Into the food/processor-blender with salt, pepper, and water..  Medium speed until it looks as smooth or chunky as you prefer.  But it's hot.  And I like hot.  I'm interested to see how it changes after it cools down and/or goes in the fridge overnight.

 

Glad I did it.

12 minutes ago, jimmyjazz said:

Yeah, I'd eat that.  Do you ship?

No, but you have a kid in my current hometown for a little longer you probably need to come visit.  I'll make you some.

 

Wait.  It's summer.  Nevermind.   Just make the first recipe in the comments for the video in the OP.

Edited June 16, 2023 by dcbc

[billfromlaketravis 11444]

I think every big TexMex chain is missing business by not putting a rack of salsa by the hostess stand. 
 

Make your salsa, add preservatives to keep in a can. Profit. 
 

If you’re not willing to do that, don’t hide your bulk menu on page 27 El T. 

I believe they their use chips and salsa like a loss leader. How many times have you been in a restaurant for a couple beers, and you ended up ordering an entree? Exactly. 

[dcbc 14464]

57 minutes ago, Enemy07 said:

Report back. Jalapenos might be alright if you like the flavor. I'm more of a habaneros fan.

They don't.  And I'm sensitive to too much jalapeno flavor.  I think that many habaneros would have killed me though. 

 

I think if I cut the jalepeno dosage in half it still will be hot enough, but not Uma Thurman at the sink hot.  Still, my lips aren't burning 10 minutes after my last dose.  So it might be fine as-is.

Edited June 16, 2023 by dcbc

[jimmyjazz 45877]

21 minutes ago, dcbc said:

No, but you have a kid in my current hometown for a little longer you probably need to come visit.  I'll make you some.

 

Wait.  It's summer.  Nevermind.   Just make the first recipe in the comments for the video in the OP.

Yup, he's done with Tyler, was accepted to UT-Austin.  Now I get to pay 30% more rent to have him 99% closer to home.

[dcbc 14464]

1 minute ago, jimmyjazz said:

Yup, he's done with Tyler, was accepted to UT-Austin.  Now I get to pay 30% more rent to have him 99% closer to home.

Very high likelihood my older one will be there in 2024 just in time for the good football schedule.  So I'll be around Austin more.

Edited June 16, 2023 by dcbc

[jimmyjazz 45877]

19 minutes ago, billfromlaketravis said:

I believe they their use chips and salsa like a loss leader. How many times have you been in a restaurant for a couple beers, and you ended up ordering an entree? Exactly. 

Toward this point, I'll offer a new "discovery":  Taco Cabana sells their pico de gallo -- $1.50 for an 8 oz container.  That's way less than HEB's fresh pico, and to me it tastes as good or better.  Other salsas are also available in bulk, but I haven't tried them.

[CooterBrown 18001]

3 heads of garlic seems like an awful lot for that salsa. That’s like 30 garlic cloves. Surely that’s a mistranslation.

[Texzilla58 4731]

I typically like making fresh salsa better than roasted. Good tomatoes, fresh japs, garlic, cilantro in the vitamix. Then add minced red onion. Takes like three minutes.

I’ve got this can of escabishe. Jalapeños, onion, carrots pickled. I think I’m going to just dump it in the vitamix and blend it up. From there add what else needs to balance it or toss it in the sink.

I just saw walMart now has Cholula jarred salsa at a cheap price. I’ll have to try it out. My usual go to jarred sauce besides Pace is Clint’s, which I find nicely balanced and Texasy.

[Enemy07 288]

11 minutes ago, Texzilla58 said:

I typically like making fresh salsa better than roasted. Good tomatoes, fresh japs, garlic, cilantro in the vitamix. Then add minced red onion. Takes like three minutes.

I’ve got this can of escabishe. Jalapeños, onion, carrots pickled. I think I’m going to just dump it in the vitamix and blend it up. From there add what else needs to balance it or toss it in the sink.

I just saw walMart now has Cholula jarred salsa at a cheap price. I’ll have to try it out. My usual go to jarred sauce besides Pace is Clint’s, which I find nicely balanced and Texasy.

Lucky. Cholula is usually gone when I go try to buy it.

[Patricio Swayze 17058]

I typically like making fresh salsa better than roasted. Good tomatoes, fresh japs, garlic, cilantro in the vitamix. Then add minced red onion. Takes like three minutes.

I’ve got this can of escabishe. Jalapeños, onion, carrots pickled. I think I’m going to just dump it in the vitamix and blend it up. From there add what else needs to balance it or toss it in the sink.

I just saw walMart now has Cholula jarred salsa at a cheap price. I’ll have to try it out. My usual go to jarred sauce besides Pace is Clint’s, which I find nicely balanced and Texasy.

Clint’s hot is a good salsa as far as store bought goes.

I also tend to prefer fresh than roasted.

[Enemy07 288]

Mexican dads haha.

 

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=-V38mfSi2BE&pp=ygUWbWV4aWNhbiBkYWRzIHRyeSBzYWxzYQ%3D%3D

Edited June 16, 2023 by Enemy07

[Patricio Swayze 17058]

Apparently I am a Mexican dad.

[Enemy07 288]

56 minutes ago, Patricio Swayze said:

Apparently I am a Mexican dad.

One of those guys seemed bias. People do not want to hurt their abuelitas. She hates me.

[dcbc 14464]

2 hours ago, CooterBrown said:

3 heads of garlic seems like an awful lot for that salsa. That’s like 30 garlic cloves. Surely that’s a mistranslation.

It was a pain in the ass is what it was.  But the result is not over-garlicy

[bluto 4912]

10 hours ago, billfromlaketravis said:

I think every big TexMex chain is missing business by not putting a rack of salsa by the hostess stand. 
 

Make your salsa, add preservatives to keep in a can. Profit. 
 

If you’re not willing to do that, don’t hide your bulk menu on page 27 El T. 

I believe they their use chips and salsa like a loss leader. How many times have you been in a restaurant for a couple beers, and you ended up ordering an entree? Exactly. 

Friend of mine looked into starting a salsa line for commercial/retail sale, meeting fda standards (and just general preserving) and keeping the recipe as close to ‘authentic’ as possible along with finding a processor was an absolute m-fer that killed the idea. Shit was really good salsa too. 

[bluto 4912]

Also fun fact, when I visit friends out of state I’ll go buy a quart of salsa from restaurant nearby and freeze it solid overnight. It’s totally fine to pack solid frozen (former) liquids in a carry on.