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Most "Texan" thing you've ever done?

Brisketexan

By Brisketexan
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Brisketexan

Brisketexan 105121

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I had a particular memory pop into my head from a LONG time ago, and realized "holy crap, that's a pretty 'Texas' damn story."  I mean, if you're a real Texan and you've lived here long enough, you've done plenty of things that would merit mention: fallen into the bay/lake while fishing drunk, shot beer cans tossed into a stock tank, hollered "OU sucks!" a near infinite number of times, that sort of thing.  But surely y'all have got some relatively unique ones.

Mine happened in college.  We were doing a barbecue for some big event (I can't remember what for), I was pretty much in charge of the cooking.  While the briskets were on the smoker, we decided to go out running around, doing some stupid shit that resulted in several of us being, ummm, unfortunately detained by the local constabulary.   So, as I'm being cuffed and placed in the back of a squad car, I tell one of the guys who isn't getting arrested "hey....remember that the briskets need to come off the smokers at 6:00."

So, my entry is "upon being arrested, reminded a friend to make sure to pull the briskets off the smoker so they didn't get overcooked."

No charges were brought, by the way, and the bbq turned out great, and we had a great story to tell upon our liberation from custody.

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Longhornstampede

Longhornstampede 3182

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Hiked Guadalupe peak

Swam in the Rio Grande

Drank A LOT of Lone Star and Pearl back in the day

Sang the Eyes of Texas standing on a conference room table in Arizona as part of a bet

First vehicle was a pick up

Married a girl who is a descendant of one of the Old 300

Attended the University of BY GOD Texas

Saddle broke a horse - in reality I was the one who got broke the first time I tried getting on underestimating how things were going

Shot every kind of gun I could get my hands on

I dunno 

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Armybrat

Armybrat 40839

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Fell off a quarter horse at full speed in a grassy pasture, rolled about 20’, got back on the horse to finish the tour of the bbq host’s ranch. 
(the 6 or 7 beers helped prep me for the fall)

Not bad for a Georgia-born city boy who hadn’t ridden an equine since childhood, and that was a Shetland pony.

Edited by Armybrat
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Hate

Hate 20108

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17 minutes ago, ztejas said:

4th generation Austinite if we're playing that game.

I forgot to mention that I'm also a 4th generation descendant of posthumous Texas Ranger.  He was the sheriff of  Llano County during the Civil War and fought off Comanche Indian attacks.

1 minute ago, Firemans4Horn said:

Brought my whole family to an OG @hornian narbecue backyard party. God damn was that a Texan Fuckin day. 

What the fuck is a narbecue??  I don't recall those.

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ztejas

ztejas 43420

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2 minutes ago, Hate said:

I forgot to mention that I'm also a 4th generation descendant of posthumous Texas Ranger.  He was the sheriff of  Llano County during the Civil War and fought off Comanche Indian attacks.

No, I mean, you got me. I just think there aren't a ton of people in Austin whose great grandfather built a house here.

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Firemans4Horn

Firemans4Horn 18048

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5 minutes ago, Hate said:

I forgot to mention that I'm also a 4th generation descendant of posthumous Texas Ranger.  He was the sheriff of  Llano County during the Civil War and fought off Comanche Indian attacks.

What the fuck is a narbecue??  I don't recall those.


IMG_2182.thumb.jpeg.fd4986b3a43d7a90bc63969b30fce0b3.jpeg

 

@hornian will save children; but not the English children. 

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bolverk

bolverk 29671

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Had a long list but my post disappeared. I'll try again:

  • Ridden a pumpjack drunk out in the Permian Basin
  • Got laid in the back of a car in Palo Duro Canyon
  • Ridden horses and dirtbikes
  • Got degrees from Texas and Tech
  • Caught red snapper out in the gulf off Port A
  • Got a blowjob in a barn
  • Been to every corner of the state with only Eagle Pass and Bay City missing from the "major cities" list
  • Been in more duststorms than I can count and have seen three tornados in person
  • Got charged by a javelina at the bottom of a cliff but buddy at the top shot it dead in its tracks
  • Sandsurfed Monahans State Park and swam at Balmorhea
  • Worked at the Capitol Complex for a few years
  • Slept under the stars in the Davis Mountains
  • Ate at the top of Hemisphere Tower
  • Hunted jackrabbits from the hood of a car using the headlights to spot them
  • Have eaten rattlesnake at a roundup and have been to a number of rodeos
  • Skinnydipped Hippie Hollow on a second date
  • Hunted at my grandparents' place outside Brownwood
  • Conceived in a field on the Katy Prairie, born at Baylor Medical Center in Dallas, raised in West Texas
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Hairy Biped

Hairy Biped 586

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Went to Luckenbach on a nice Spring day, walked into the post office/gift store, bought a cold Lone Star from Marge (RIP) at the inside part of the bar.  Then meandered around to the area where the outside part of the bar is and noticed a guy playing guitar and singing a Jerry Jeff Walker song under the big oak trees for a small crowd.  Slowly wander around to the area where the people were watching and look up at the guy singing and realize that it's Jerry Jeff Walker.  This was back when there were still beer tabs all over the ground.  Mid to late 90s-ish.  That was pretty Texan I think.

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52-80

52-80 19151

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5 hours ago, bolverk said:

Had a long list but my post disappeared. I'll try again:

  • Ridden a pumpjack drunk out in the Permian Basin
  • Got laid in the back of a car in Palo Duro Canyon
  • Ridden horses and dirtbikes
  • Got degrees from Texas and Tech
  • Caught red snapper out in the gulf off Port A
  • Got a blowjob in a barn
  • Been to every corner of the state with only Eagle Pass and Bay City missing from the "major cities" list
  • Been in more duststorms than I can count and have seen three tornados in person
  • Got charged by a javelina at the bottom of a cliff but buddy at the top shot it dead in its tracks
  • Sandsurfed Monahans State Park and swam at Balmorhea
  • Worked at the Capitol Complex for a few years
  • Slept under the stars in the Davis Mountains
  • Ate at the top of Hemisphere Tower
  • Hunted jackrabbits from the hood of a car using the headlights to spot them
  • Have eaten rattlesnake at a roundup and have been to a number of rodeos
  • Skinnydipped Hippie Hollow on a second date
  • Hunted at my grandparents' place outside Brownwood
  • Conceived in a field on the Katy Prairie, born at Baylor Medical Center in Dallas, raised in West Texas

all that, and you still haven't watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhäuser Gate

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beer

beer 3220

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Got chased out of the littlefield fountain drunk in my underwear the day SRV died.  Had to do the wet walk of shame through jester in the daylight where people could see. Not too many people, we just started the next semester but still. 

Edited by beer
drunk
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Armybrat

Armybrat 40839

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9 hours ago, Hate said:

I forgot to mention that I'm also a 4th generation descendant of posthumous Texas Ranger.  He was the sheriff of  Llano County during the Civil War and fought off Comanche Indian attacks.

Oh yeah? 
Mrs. Brat’s maternal grandpa was the only dentist in Lampasas during the 1890s. 
So… there.

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immamac

immamac 42845

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14 hours ago, davidg said:

Got drunk and rode a pump jack.

Very texas

13 hours ago, Longhornstampede said:

Hiked Guadalupe peak

Swam in the Rio Grande

Drank A LOT of Lone Star and Pearl back in the day

Sang the Eyes of Texas standing on a conference room table in Arizona as part of a bet

First vehicle was a pick up

Married a girl who is a descendant of one of the Old 300

Attended the University of BY GOD Texas

Saddle broke a horse - in reality I was the one who got broke the first time I tried getting on underestimating how things were going

Shot every kind of gun I could get my hands on

I dunno 

This guy also seems pretty Texan to me. 

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Crapinon

Crapinon 2257

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Hiked to the South Rim, Climbed Emory peak, forged the Rio Grande into Santa Elena canyon, took the 25 cent ferry to Boquillas Mexico, drank Lone Star in the old brewery, took too many trips measured by six packs instead of miles, Palo Duro canyon, White Elephant Saloon (every Wednesday for 2 years), Big Texan Steakhouse, Cadillac Ranch, 2 Texas/OU weekends before they arrested everyone for anything (Shout out to Commerce Street Elvis "We don't need the Dallas Police"), South Padre Spring break, Matramoros big liquor store and Matamoros Boys town and survived too many dives and biker bars to be alive. 

 

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MissingInAction

MissingInAction 25064

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Getting shit faced at a bar in Newport Beach where I got the steers and queers line thrown my way. Naturally I obliged the offender with a kick to the shins followed by an uppercut.

Chaos ensued. When the cops showed up someone yelled, ,"Be careful! There's a fucking Texan in there!"

I hopped the bar and escaped out the back through the kitchen.

road house GIF

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burntorangebongos

burntorangebongos 10710

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Going way up Andy Bowie Park on SPI in the late 70s with a group of kids, 2 dads and one college kid. We had about 25 horses altogether and we knew each other from going to the Hidalgo Sheriff's Posse every Saturday during rodeo season. My friend competed in barrel racing and I just liked to go and ride her big mare. We spent the day riding bareback in the dunes and in the shallows of the Laguna Madre and camped on the beach side. Me and a couple of friends slipped out in the moonlight with our horses and rode the dunes because we wanted to see the moon reflect off the still water of the Laguna. We had convinced ourselves that it would be magical. I had put a rope around the neck of the big mare and that was the only way I could stay on her back when she climbed up a dune, the rope and her mane. We laughed at each other trying to stay on our horses. We didn't realize how far away we were so we never made it to the Laguna but the ride in the dunes was fun. We got back a couple of hours later and my friend's dad was pretty peeved at our night ride.  But he got over it fairly quick, he could never stay mad at his daughter for long. We had set up our tent too close to the high tide line and in the morning, the water was almost to the tent. We were so young and dumb, we didn't know and her dad had let us hoping we'd get wet, I guess. We rode the horses again in the morning for a bit and then cleaned them up at a car wash to get the sand off of them and the horse trailers and went home. Being an 8th grade kid about an hour from South Padre was pretty damn sweet. 

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