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Most "Texan" thing you've ever done?

Brisketexan

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F250

F250 28760

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Me and my roommate got pulled over by DPS just outside of Bandera, TX back in the mid 90's. My roommate was driving my F150 because I was drunk and in the bed of the truck was an ice chest full of beer, a couple bottles of Jack Daniel's and a small arsenal of guns. There was even a loaded a Mak-90 with a 30 round magazine I forgot to unload.

That was the day I learned about white privilege. Because despite being underage and driving a pickup with a left taillight out and me being drunk. We ended up spending about 20 minutes with the State Troopers shooting the shit about guns and deer and being told to be careful on our way home.

That's Texas.

 

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F250

F250 28760

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3 hours ago, lemonandaturd said:

Shot the shit with Rusty Wier over a couple of beers at Donn's Depot.  

A buddy and me shared a couple of pitchers of beer with Chris Wall at Floore's one night. A big thunderstorm rolled in so the place was dead and Chris joined us for some beer and conversation.

He told a lot of stories about Jerry Jeff and how Jerry's wife banned him from visiting their place. It was a pretty good time but then a group of girls with Texas State shirts rolled in to the place.

Chris went from a jovial drinking partner to an Old Dirty Bastard immediately. He started pointing out ass and tits and talking dirty then finally excused himself by saying "I have a lake house in Austin, some of these girls might want to check it out tonight."

 

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SHOOTER12

SHOOTER12 8800

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On 7/12/2023 at 10:58 AM, Ten Bears said:

 

When I was 12 I got kicked square in the chest by the first horse I ever broke.  It knocked me about about 10 feet away and my dad said he couldn't get a heartbeat for what seemed like an eternity but he figures it was a little less than a minute. I woke up and was fine except for the horseshoe shaped 1" knot on my chest.

I plowed my first field all by myself at 9 years old and had my fist pickup (58 Chevy stepside) as an 7th grader.  You grow up fast on the farm.  Probably illegal now.

That's kinda Texan I guess.

Nope...that's DAMNED Texan if you ask me.

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SHOOTER12

SHOOTER12 8800

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On 7/6/2023 at 9:29 AM, Brothahorn said:


 

 


Never heard of that one. But we basically did the same with hogs. Miracle that no one got shot.

I went on an authentic trail ride once. With all the trimmings, horses, mules, wagons, and such. No electricity at all. Man, that shit sucked.

 

 

On 7/6/2023 at 10:06 AM, RPM said:

It wasn't the Red Stegall trail ride was it?

 

On 7/6/2023 at 10:19 AM, Brothahorn said:
On 7/6/2023 at 10:06 AM, RPM said:
It wasn't the Red Stegall trail ride was it?

Nothing that fancy. Just some of the county and church leaders thought it would be fun to show the kids how things used to be. It was sponsored by the circuit church. I think we did about 15 miles, then camped out. It could have been fun if there had been less adults there. Especially the holy rollers.

To hell with that. You should have had a trail ride with Armybrat when he he rode with the Youngers and James boys.

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QuesoEspecial

QuesoEspecial 255

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Scheduled a patrol in Iraq in order to arrive at destination in time to watch VY win Texas the National Championship...Patrol got  rescheduled anyway for the next night due to combat operations on our route which gave plenty of time to watch the game from LSA Anaconda 🤘

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Bevo&Pevo

Bevo&Pevo 5120

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When I took my first breath, I made for a 5th living generation of strong Czech/Russian stock. Recently, I sent a request trying to recover the picture.  No luck yet.

Cut my teeth on a Mexican gal named Raquel.  Thanks Roxy.

Started building fence with Dad around 12, working in the filed with tractors, combines, etc.

Swam at a water pump location for a rice field.  That's something you never forget; the water is cold and clear.

Got my ass busted with a paddle (at school and home) more times than I care to think of.  Momma said, I had a lot of Texas spirit.  Dad said, I was hardheaded.

Picked about a bazillion gallons of dewberries and worked on twice as much barb wire fence.

On a football team that won a 2A state title.

Won a county BBQ championship and got to cook at the HSL&R.

Guzzled Shiner Bock at the brewery back when they used to do the Shiner Bocktober Festival there.  

Danced at Gruene and float trips on Comal, Frio, Rio Grande, Guadalupe, and the Colorado rivers.

Drank more than 1 margarita at Jorge's on 6th.  Closed the deal tons of tail at the Cedar Door.

Attend the greatest university in the world and certainly the known universe.  TEXAS FIGHT!  Lost count for the aggy/UT game, but certainly close to 15 or more.  We made the last one in CS with our kids and my dad.

Had a pair of custom boots made.  Now, my oldest son has 'em. For reasons that are unknown I never got a hat.  I guess I'm happy with off the shelf straw ones.

Worked in the O&G industry for 24 years.

I know the difference between a kolache and a klobasnicky.  Klobásník - Wikipedia

Spent the night in the officer's quarters at La Bahia SP in Goliad.  The only SP that with let you reserve a room for the night.   If you elect to do this, you'll get the place to yourself for the night.  Kinda eerie walking around at night thinking about the history of it.  On our night there was a major thunderstorm. Recommended.

Visited all the painted Catholic churches.

Got a state flag for my dad that flew over our state capital on his birthday to give to him as a gift.

Planted my first bluebonnets this year in the yard.  Hopefully, they'll return next year.

Finally, I have never rented any pigs.

 

 

 

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Ten Bears

Ten Bears 2479

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My second piece of ass was my freshman year of high school on a trip to Del Rio where my dad was racing mules.  He had several racing quarter horses and then racing mules back before parimutuel betting ruined all of that. In La Cuña at the calcutta the night before the races my dad tells my buddy and I that his best friend and the jockeys were going to Boys Town and asked did we want to go with them.  Why yes, yes we did want to go with them.  Right in front of my mom he gives us each $20 and says to be careful while my mom just shakes her head.

On the way over there one of the jockeys pulls out a joint and we all get high af, with my dad's friend saying if I repeat anything I see tonight I will never go anywhere with him again.  I kept my word because the next year we go back and I get laid for third time.

The next summer we raced mules in Durango.  Did not get laid but drank moonshine for first time.

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Jiggy-Z

Jiggy-Z 3432

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Spent a couple of nights under the stars at mile marker 58 Padre Island National Seashore.

Played Texas/OU halftime show with Willy.

Snuck into the Disch over visitors bullpen fence many times.

Played pool and drank Lone Star in a beer joint....when I was 8. Summer

Had my first shot of whiskey on a pier in Copano bay .. also 8. Winter.

Taken a burt orange shit in the dunes at Matagorda.

Dipped Copenhagen...at my wedding reception.

Killed grasshoppers with a homemade slingshot.

Got fired from the Posse East.

Built my own home out in the country.

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SHOOTER12

SHOOTER12 8800

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On 7/13/2023 at 8:55 PM, Elvis said:

I went to Willies last picnick at Leukenbach.  Summer between senior and freshman year. We camped at/on Enchanted Rock. 
 

We brought girls and had a lot of fun. Highway Patrol interfered regularly. 

 

On 7/14/2023 at 10:20 AM, RPM said:

Steve Brule What GIF

 

On 7/14/2023 at 7:40 PM, Elvis said:

Woops. 

Fucking yankee...

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SHOOTER12

SHOOTER12 8800

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20 hours ago, F250 said:

Me and my roommate got pulled over by DPS just outside of Bandera, TX back in the mid 90's. My roommate was driving my F150 because I was drunk and in the bed of the truck was an ice chest full of beer, a couple bottles of Jack Daniel's and a small arsenal of guns. There was even a loaded a Mak-90 with a 30 round magazine I forgot to unload.

That was the day I learned about white privilege. Because despite being underage and driving a pickup with a left taillight out and me being drunk. We ended up spending about 20 minutes with the State Troopers shooting the shit about guns and deer and being told to be careful on our way home.

That's Texas.

 

Today you guys would be dead...

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Gladeite

Gladeite 375

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First job was working for HL Hunt shooting crows in his pecan orchards.  $1/crow.  Summer after 2nd grade.  Got dropped off at 7:30 with a sack lunch, a pocketful of shells and a single shot .410.   Picked up at 3 pm for an accounting with the ranch foreman.  

At 14, drove family truck and dad built gooseneck trailer to Laredo to drop off missionary supplies.  The original driver got sick and I said I could do it.  How hard can it be to read a map and drive in a straight line all the way down 35?  I had been driving our gooseneck all over the farm the previous 2 years. I had zero issues on the trip.

Our house did not have any insulation because my parents saved a few bucks and bled off natural gas from a well that was pretty close to the house.   Still darn cold in the mornings.  My folks would light the fire about 5 a.m., wake us up about 5:40 and it sure feels great to put on your Tough Skins jeans.  The polyester/nylon reinforced denim felt amazing after being warmed by the fire.  Alternatively, in the summer, always loved laying on fresh washed sheets that had been on the clothes line all day and laying next to an open window while the attic fan sucks in all the fresh air.

With warm clothes on, gather eggs, feed the pigs and then walk down to the road to catch the 6:30 bus.  Home about 4 p.m., saddle the horses and move cows to different pastures or move hay around on the tractor.  At dark, neighbors would show up at our house for a little headin & heeling at our lighted ropin pen.  

Had a party line and my parents would not allow a long distance call to the town where I went to school.  So, had to work with what I had and cruise the nearest DQ and Sonic for potential conquests.  

For us, a very normal Texas life.  Don't miss it.

 

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Brothahorn

Brothahorn 10087

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First job was working for HL Hunt shooting crows in his pecan orchards.  $1/crow.  Summer after 2nd grade.  Got dropped off at 7:30 with a sack lunch, a pocketful of shells and a single shot .410.   Picked up at 3 pm for an accounting with the ranch foreman.  
At 14, drove family truck and dad built gooseneck trailer to Laredo to drop off missionary supplies.  The original driver got sick and I said I could do it.  How hard can it be to read a map and drive in a straight line all the way down 35?  I had been driving our gooseneck all over the farm the previous 2 years. I had zero issues on the trip.
Our house did not have any insulation because my parents saved a few bucks and bled off natural gas from a well that was pretty close to the house.   Still darn cold in the mornings.  My folks would light the fire about 5 a.m., wake us up about 5:40 and it sure feels great to put on your Tough Skins jeans.  The polyester/nylon reinforced denim felt amazing after being warmed by the fire.  Alternatively, in the summer, always loved laying on fresh washed sheets that had been on the clothes line all day and laying next to an open window while the attic fan sucks in all the fresh air.
With warm clothes on, gather eggs, feed the pigs and then walk down to the road to catch the 6:30 bus.  Home about 4 p.m., saddle the horses and move cows to different pastures or move hay around on the tractor.  At dark, neighbors would show up at our house for a little headin & heeling at our lighted ropin pen.  
Had a party line and my parents would not allow a long distance call to the town where I went to school.  So, had to work with what I had and cruise the nearest DQ and Sonic for potential conquests.  
For us, a very normal Texas life.  Don't miss it.
 


Your story reminds me of the when we moved to the country. There was no running water in the house. So, while that was being fixed, every morning I had to catch water. When it was bath time, I would have to catch enough for 4 people in the foot tubs. Then cover the tub with plastic so the damn grass hoppers wouldn't get in.

Then, later on, we had a calf who couldn't suck because her momma tit got too big. So first we started off with the big ass baby bottle, then we moved to the bucket with the nipple. She would conveniently knock it off the fence if I didn't watch her. And if it didn't matter how hungry she was, I still had to catch her ass every morning.

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Hpara759

Hpara759 1778

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5 minutes ago, Brothahorn said:


 

 


Your story reminds me of the when we moved to the country. There was no running water in the house. So, while that was being fixed, every morning I had to catch water. When it was bath time, I would have to catch enough for 4 people in the foot tubs. Then cover the tub with plastic so the damn grass hoppers wouldn't get in.

Then, later on, we had a calf who couldn't suck because her momma tit got too big. So first we started off with the big ass baby bottle, then we moved to the bucket with the nipple. She would conveniently knock it off the fence if I didn't watch her. And if it didn't matter how hungry she was, I still had to catch her ass every morning.
 

 

the old man was covered with tattoos and scars......

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RPM

RPM 26315

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52 minutes ago, Brothahorn said:

At 14, drove family truck and dad built gooseneck trailer to Laredo to drop off missionary supplies.  The original driver got sick and I said I could do it.  How hard can it be to read a map and drive in a straight line all the way down 35?  I had been driving our gooseneck all over the farm the previous 2 years. I had zero issues on the trip.

At 15 I got my Hardship License so I could "feed cattle." Downside it was daylight only. Fast forward 2 months and I'm driving a 1967 Needlenose Pete running local in Houston. Never forgot the advice the Terminal Manager gave me, "turn the signal on, count to 4 and change lanes." The one time I didn't follow that advice I wound up stalled on the Ship Channel bridge. Liked to have never got that bitch moving again. Anyway, it was all good until the guy that actually owned the company found out I was driving one of his trucks and I got fired. Our yard was at 59 & 610 before 610 was finished. Used to hear gunshots all night long.

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Longhornstampede

Longhornstampede 3180

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I walked into a dive bar in Grand Prairie back in 2007, sat down and realized I was sitting next to Johnny Rodriguez. We closed the bar down and at the end of the night I paid the tab. That little fucker put away considerably more beer than I did, and I could throw them down back then

No goats were stolen that night as far as I know. 

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SHOOTER12

SHOOTER12 8800

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Posted (edited)
On 7/17/2023 at 11:07 PM, Longhornstampede said:

I walked into a dive bar in Grand Prairie back in 2007, sat down and realized I was sitting next to Johnny Rodriguez. We closed the bar down and at the end of the night I paid the tab. That little fucker put away considerably more beer than I did, and I could throw them down back then

No goats were stolen that night as far as I know. 

But, were any goats fucked?

Edited by SHOOTER12
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Felix

Felix 607

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Drank beer and played domino's at the Type store after dove hunting/tank fishing at my grandfathers land in Coupland. 

Drove to Lexington at 6 am for Snow's BBQ on several Saturday mornings before Texas Monthly fucked it up for everyone. 

Fixed fences at my other grandfathers place in Elgin after Curls the bull pushed it over to get to Mr. Shroeders heifers in the next pasture. 

Chased Curls back to our pasture.  He was very compliant for some reason. Maybe he was tired.

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JCHIL

JCHIL 414

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4th Generation Texan:

Attended David Clyde's debut at old Arlington Stadium

Attended Nolan Ryan's 7th No hitter at old Arlington Stadium

Castrated calves in Ennis TX and saved the gonads in a mason jar and the ranch hand's wife cooked fresh fried mountain oysters that same day for dinner

Watched my Grandfather eat fried bass eggs from bass we caught - he loved them 

Rode bulls at Kowbell Rodeo in Mansfield in 8th grade

Had a horse growing up and still have 2 now

Used to take my shotgun to High School proudly displayed in the gun rack in my truck in the early eighties so I could go dove hunting after school

S. padre/Matamoros spring breaks, guadalupe river tubing, hunting all over the state, geology field trips in Big Bend..... 

 

 

Edited by JCHIL
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Rip76

Rip76 4924

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The week before the annual Texas City/La Marque football game.  Me and two other friends “broke in” to the TC football late at night.  (Basically climbed the fence)

We had a 12 pack of Bud heavy and we’re just sitting in the stands.

So we decide to get up and go looking around under the bleachers.  Well apparently someone left a door unlocked, and behind the door was the TC Mascot “Big Vic.”

Looked like this:  (but a little more updated)

IMG_2043.jpeg

I lived across the street from the stadium. Ran home and got a can of black spray paint.  We painted “TC sucks/La Marque Rules,” on it and took it out to the middle of the field.  Surrounded it with the empty Bud cans and took off.

TC beat La Marque that week which was a rarity.

I’d like to think we had a hand in that victory.

Edited by Rip76
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Elvis

Elvis 3369

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Senior year of high school. Double date. My date is Miss Teen Texas. (Maybe she didn’t win, but she competed). Other couple is my best friend (inside linebacker) and his date is the beautiful and dumb town bicycle. 
 

After dinner we go to a little spot at the lake. Things are going well for everyone in the front and back seats and we’re all down to our skivies. We get the girls to parade around in front of the headlights before a dip in the lake. 
 

After a little swim and making out, we head back to the car for what should have happened but didn’t. 
 

Linebacker bro tries to press the girls into switching dates for a while. 
 

Miss teen TX didn’t expect that and it ruined all the action  “that’s enough, take us home”

So I settled for a burger and a grape snow cone, dropped em off early but we didn’t go home. 
 

True story. 

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Hate

Hate 20106

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We had a quarter horse ranch out near Waring, Texas growing up. I worked there for a few summers cleaning stalls, unloading hay (coastal and alfalfa), repairing fences, and working with the horses. We had river access to the Guadalupe so we would jump in to cool off during lunch. I think about those days fondly while I’m sitting inn my office in downtown Houston. I’d rather be back in the ranch doing real work.

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Beau Vine

Beau Vine 54203

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2 hours ago, Elvis said:

Senior year of high school. Double date. My date is Miss Teen Texas. (Maybe she didn’t win, but she competed). Other couple is my best friend (inside linebacker) and his date is the beautiful and dumb town bicycle. 
 

After dinner we go to a little spot at the lake. Things are going well for everyone in the front and back seats and we’re all down to our skivies. We get the girls to parade around in front of the headlights before a dip in the lake. 
 

After a little swim and making out, we head back to the car for what should have happened but didn’t. 
 

Linebacker bro tries to press the girls into switching dates for a while. 
 

Miss teen TX didn’t expect that and it ruined all the action  “that’s enough, take us home”

So I settled for a burger and a grape snow cone, dropped em off early but we didn’t go home. 
 

True story. 

So did you fuck the linebacker or did linebacker fuck you?

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Patricio Swayze

Patricio Swayze 17058

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Not something I did, but my grandfather (so by proxy I guess).  But seems to fit the thread.

My mom's dad was a hard drinking, racist South Texan.  My biological grandmother I never knew was a drug addict.  When my mom was maybe 1, my grandmother took her and her siblings to New York.  Kidnap might not be the right word as I am sure she wanted to get away from her situation, but it was against my grandfather's will.  He could fly planes and flew to New York to bring them all back.  Supposedly on the way back, my mom needed milk, so my grandfather landed in a farmer's field and acquired milk from the farmer.  Kind of feel that is a very Texan spirit.

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Armybrat

Armybrat 40814

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On 7/18/2023 at 2:52 PM, ETHorn said:

Born in the Crazy Water Hotel in Mineral Wells.

Spent my bachelor party on the Brazos River.

 

First of June, 1967 - My bachelor “party” was at Lake Travis’ Windy Point with four friends, three cases of Lone Star, a can of beans, a deck of cards, and one blanket. 
Being the guest of honor, I got the blanket, but sometime during the night I rolled down into a cactus. 
Not the best night’s sleep.

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Tex Long

Tex Long 4382

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Had a computer gig in '68 in England. Finished previous one in Charleston SC, flew to NYC, got on a BOAC flight to London - not long after they had a 747 drop an engine and scare the shit out of errybody, so not a crowded flight. Anyway, suitably Texan, I was carrying a brand new (to me) 1940's D28 that I had bought off a guy in SC. I had it in the seat next to me. Yes, I bought an extra ticket for it - couldn't get a suitably hard shell case for that beautiful thing before I had to get to Limeyland. Having been nearly knee-capped a few times, I only flew 1st, so no problem with stews over the identity of my seat-mate, "Martin". They were pretty excited, thinking I was some sort of bigshot country musician, black hat, jeans, Luccheses, semi-long hair... they plied me with suitable alcoholic beverages, and by the time we landed (I think it  was Heathrow) I was feeling no pain.

This was before jetways and we had to walk down a stairway, which I did carrying the guitar over my shoulder. On the tarmac, there were airport people making sure we headed to the customs gate, and there were civilians - evidently drivers - waiting to pick up folks. One of them was for me, although neither of us knew it at the time.

As I got to the bottom of the steps, the guy who turned out to be waiting for me, cried out in a voice that was likely audible for at least a quarter-mile, "Jeeezusss Fucking Keeerist! ANOTHER fucking TEXAN with another fucking GEETAR. Fuck me! What I wouldn't give to see one get off a fucking aeroplane with a FUCKING TROMBONE!"

He wasn't kidding either, but we got along pretty well. He worked for my client, and he drove me around for the next few days. I never did get around to picking and singing for those folks.

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Tylerocks

Tylerocks 2553

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Mid 80;s..Enjoyed a coke float at a real drug store/soda fountain Arp, TX...wearing short coduroy OP shorts, a cutoff/half shirt, and cowboy boots.

Either that or going dove hunting at a friends ranch in south Texas, near Carrizo Springs. 

Hunting in shorts and boots, limiting in about 15 min, cooking the dove that night while drinking whiskey and beer and driving 4 wheelers.

Someone followed a bird down and ended up peppering the ranch owner.  That person was asked to leave.

Then someone was driving their hunting truck while out trying to shoot pigs..The truck had a stand/seats on top.  Guess the driver forgot about that and tried to cut across a field and hit their irrigation sprinklers.  Peeled the top of the suburban back like a sardine can.

We were all asked to leave after that.

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