being offended

[shadow_operative 15932]

6 minutes ago, Samson's Wig said:

Counterpoint: The guy who has demonstrated being more intellectually divergent than any other regular poster on this site complaining that he can't say the R-word may have a point when you consider the other comments regarding reclaiming slurs.  Maybe that's what is actually happening here and we should be celebrating his mission.

you're like the 10th person to say this, and it's such a wild mischaracterization that i can't tell if you're just that dense or if you have some axe to grind with me so it's intentional.

1)i don't need anyone's permission to say anything. have i ever come across to any of you as someone who seeks out your approval before i say something?

2)the words retard and retarded are not words that i generally use, and this thread/my point have nothing to do with me wanting to "be allowed" to use this word, which again, is a preposterous contention to begin with- this idea that i need your approval to say what i want to say.

3)this is (or has largely become) 100% about the absolute soul of this website and its predecessor. period. this all started with someone claiming (and getting lots of support) that "there is no place, in any context, for the words retarded/retard to be used on this site." that is fucking bullshit. that is objectively, factually wrong.

my intentions when starting this thread had nothing to do with this debate about retard/retarded. that incident was simply the genesis for my thoughts about people being offended, it was never the main point. but now that it's gone that way, yeah, i think you've fucking lost your mind if you believe that the office, norm macdonald, kenny powers, shameless, etc don't belong on shaggy. that is absolutely fucking bonkers, and antithetical the very basis of this site's existence.

further, the crowd who have come out of the woodwork with countless personal stories of how they have loved ones who are mentally handicapped and who have then pretended to have some sort of firm stance on "not making fun of others' disabilities" have all shown themselves to be self important frauds as this stance suddenly disappears whenever someone attacks me and mental health, in this very thread no less. do you think they'd be cool if i went to their mentally retarded loved one and said, "go get your bike helmet"? how about, "go get your bib"? you think they'd just be cool with that? no. of course not. they're ready to go to war over someone saying "thats retarded", but no amount of directly hateful jans about my mental illness can even move their needle. it's all fake morality, and they've exposed themselves. 

when i started this thread it was legitimately just about the idea of being offended, and i never could have imagined the different paths we've gone down. a whole lotta people here have exposed themselves though, i will start that much. that's probably my biggest takeaway from this thread. 

[irishtexan 11522]

1 minute ago, shadow_operative said:

you're like the 10th person to say this, and it's such a wild mischaracterization that i can't tell if you're just that dense or if you have some axe to grind with me so it's intentional.

1)i don't need anyone's permission to say anything. have i ever come across to any of you as someone who seeks out your approval before i say something?

2)the words retard and retarded are not words that i generally use, and this thread/my point have nothing to do with me wanting to "be allowed" to use this word, which again, is a preposterous contention to begin with- this idea that i need your approval to say what i want to say.

3)this is (or has largely become) 100% about the absolute soul of this website and its predecessor. period. this all started with someone claiming (and getting lots of support) that "there is no place, in any context, for the words retarded/retard to be used on this site." that is fucking bullshit. that is objectively, factually wrong.

my intentions when starting this thread had nothing to do with this debate about retard/retarded. that incident was simply the genesis for my thoughts about people being offended, it was never the main point. but now that it's gone that way, yeah, i think you've fucking lost your mind if you believe that the office, norm macdonald, kenny powers, shameless, etc don't belong on shaggy. that is absolutely fucking bonkers, and antithetical the very basis of this site's existence.

further, the crowd who have come out of the woodwork with countless personal stories of how they have loved ones who are mentally handicapped and who have then pretended to have some sort of firm stance on "not making fun of others' disabilities" have all shown themselves to be self important frauds as this stance suddenly disappears whenever someone attacks me and mental health, in this very thread no less. do you think they'd be cool if i went to their mentally retarded loved one and said, "go get your bike helmet"? how about, "go get your bib"? you think they'd just be cool with that? no. of course not. they're ready to go to war over someone saying "thats retarded", but no amount of directly hateful jans about my mental illness can even move their needle. it's all fake morality, and they've exposed themselves. 

when i started this thread it was legitimately just about the idea of being offended, and i never could have imagined the different paths we've gone down. a whole lotta people here have exposed themselves though, i will start that much. that's probably my biggest takeaway from this thread. 

you seem very offended.

[closetohumping 17479]

6 minutes ago, shadow_operative said:

 

1)i don't need anyone's permission to say anything. have i ever come across to any of you as someone who seeks out your approval before i say something?

You started this thread in hopes of finding posters to validate or agree with your use of the word.  
 

 

Edited July 19, 2023 by closetohumping

[BabaYaga 15328]

7 minutes ago, shadow_operative said:

and i never could have imagined the different paths we've gone down.

[LCHorn 2632]

@blacklab@immamacCan we move this to "Board Discussion"?

This isn't really a current events discussion. 

[shadow_operative 15932]

16 minutes ago, irishtexan said:

you seem very offended.

great joke, just as hilarious as the first 17 times it was posted. 

[Dahobbs 17699]

1 minute ago, shadow_operative said:

great joke, just as hilarious as the first 17 times it was posted. 

It isn't a joke. It is an accurate observation. You don't seem to understand the meaning of the word. 

[closetohumping 17479]

44 minutes ago, Dahobbs said:

He suggested it was censorship. In truth it was the artists choosing to make their art more inclusive. Can you really not see the difference? 

Can we just meet in the middle and say it was artists pandering to the PC crowd?

[Lurch 5931]

this all started with someone claiming (and getting lots of support) that "there is no place, in any context, for the words retarded/retard to be used on this site." that is fucking bullshit. that is objectively, factually wrong.

I was indeed under the impression that Imma (or maybe bl) had flat out stated it as a rule here. That the mods were willing to put up with a lot of juvenile shit, but not the N or R words. Those would earn a timeout.

I’m fine with that. There are lines on virtually all boards. They must get drawn somewhere and their placement is often debatable, but I think this one is reasonable.

[YChang 3463]

I don’t mean this in a negative way Derka. And I dunno if it’s a chicken/egg deal but… umm, you probably shouldn’t expect much much grace or backing because you’re just not very likable in this forum/format. Some out of your control unfortunately, but some of your own doing.

[closetohumping 17479]

28 minutes ago, irishtexan said:

you seem very offended.

of·fend

verb

1.

cause to feel upset, annoyed, or resentful.

 

 

[Cheeseweasel 26438]

2 hours ago, Helobious said:

Blazing saddles wouldn’t get remade today because if it isn’t an action movie or a horror movie our room temp IQ population won’t go see it and it won’t make money. That’s the biggest reason. 

What if the Sherriff was a Marvel Hero? 

[Js1 85603]

7 minutes ago, closetohumping said:

Can we just meet in the middle and say it was artists pandering to the PC crowd?

[Gatorubet 30323]

1 hour ago, Js1 said:

Jesus Christ shut up about your good ole days 

This is no longer about being offended. It’s about the world changing and people being big mad they can’t use racial and homophobic slurs and punch down anymore. And that artists are more inclusive and accepting of the current climate 

And it is also about snowflake dip shits who are outraged despite being devoid of any context regarding the thing they are outraged about.   They will do things like want to ban Mark Twain’s Huckleberry Finn because of it’s historically correct usage of words now found inappropriate.    They want the book banned, even though Huck’s decision on the raft -  “I’ll go to Hell then” - instead of a decision not to help his friend - the run-away slave Nigger Jim - is one of the most profound anti-slavery, anti-racist pieces of literature in our history.

Yes, people want to ban Huckleberry Finn because of the N word.  Fucking idiots! 

Boys and girls ARE good together. As are girls and girls - and boys and boys.  Saying I like vegetables is not saying beef is morally wrong.  Jesus. 

[Dahobbs 17699]

19 minutes ago, closetohumping said:

Can we just meet in the middle and say it was artists pandering to the PC crowd?

Why assume it is pandering and not a sincerely held belief? I don't think there was any pressure on them to change a 30 year old song. 

Also, maybe my sarcasm meter needs to work. 

Edited July 19, 2023 by Dahobbs

[Horn of Gabriel 1823]

1 hour ago, 'stache said:

Yes, easily. Probably more so today with RDJ and Ben Stillers’ profiles. Again, do you even watch tv these days?

I do; and we're not talking about streaming or TV.  We're talking about a Dreamworks produced, theatrically released movie.  Maybe there are movies like TT hitting the theaters every weekend now and I just missed it?

[elguapo 4586]

[Underdog 28793]

31 minutes ago, Cheeseweasel said:

What if the Sherriff was a Marvel Hero? 

ISWYDT... 

[shadow_operative 15932]

57 minutes ago, Lurch said:

 

I was indeed under the impression that Imma (or maybe bl) had flat out stated it as a rule here. That the mods were willing to put up with a lot of juvenile shit, but not the N or R words. Those would earn a timeout.

I’m fine with that. There are lines on virtually all boards. They must get drawn somewhere and their placement is often debatable, but I think this one is reasonable.

 

my whole beef is with the "in any context whatsoever" part. the norm macdonald thread, which we all love, can't exist if we take this hard line stance. the idea that you can't post the billy madison clip here or the michael scott clip here- i know for a fact that's not what blacklab wants this place to be like. the context is what matters, and making it a black and white, all or nothing issue is where i say that factually and objectively that type of stuff has no place here. it's antithetical to this place's existence.

banning people who are being cruel and mean is normal and fine. banning michael scott and norm macdonald from shaggy is not. this place may as well not exist under those rules.

Edited July 19, 2023 by shadow_operative

[shadow_operative 15932]

1 hour ago, Dahobbs said:

It isn't a joke. It is an accurate observation. You don't seem to understand the meaning of the word. 

oh the meaning of the word? so you think the thread should have ended right here:

so according to you, any time you're upset, annoyed, or resentful that means you're offended? so if your five year old kid won't stop making noise and it annoys you, that means you're offended? if your grandma dies and that causes you to be upset, that means that your dead grandma has offended you by dying? if someone gets the job you wanted instead of you and you feel resentful, that means you're offended? that's the stance you're taking here? sorry, but this discussion is a lot more nuanced than that. if you're actually so dense as to argue otherwise then i'm not sure you have the critical thinking skills to add anything meaningful to it.

On 7/18/2023 at 6:16 AM, shadow_operative said:

i still don't find any of that to be "offensive" per se. those things might make me mad; i might look down on you, or feel sorry for you if that's how you choose to act; but as far as pearl-clutching, *gasp*, "that's offensive to me" goes?

this was in my OP. this is what we are specifically talking about. did you read it? do you understand it? or is pointing to the textbook definition of the word literally all you've got? 

Edited July 19, 2023 by shadow_operative

[Brisketexan 105445]

1 hour ago, LCHorn said:

@blacklab@immamacCan we move this to "Board Discussion"?

This isn't really a current events discussion. 

Well, it is if you're currently retarded...dammit, I mean "mentally challenged."

[shadow_operative 15932]

let me ask you this @Dahobbs-

if i asked you, "dahobbs, what do you find offensive?", would you start listing every single thing that annoys you? what's more likely, that you would just list off every single annoyance you've ever experienced, or that you'd say something along the lines of, "profanity, racism, xenophobia", etc? 

you know what we're talking about here, but you'd rather be "clever" than just take part in the discussion. it's either that, or an alternative that makes you look even worse. i guess only you know which one it is.

['stache 21892]

17 minutes ago, shadow_operative said:

oh the meaning of the word? so you think the thread should have ended right here:

so according to you, any time you're upset, annoyed, or resentful that means you're offended? so if your five year old kid won't stop making noise and it annoys you, that means you're offended? if your grandma dies and that causes you to be upset, that means that your dead grandma has offended you by dying? if someone gets the job you wanted instead of you and you feel resentful, that means you're offended? that's the stance you're taking here? sorry, but this discussion is a lot more nuanced than that. if you're actually so dense as to argue otherwise then i'm not sure you have the critical thinking skills to add anything meaningful to it.

this was in my OP. this is what we are specifically talking about. did you read it? do you understand it? or is pointing to the textbook definition of the word literally all you've got? 

This is the definition of the verb form of the word. So if your grandma died intending to cause you to feel upset, annoyed, or resentful, then yes?

Edited July 19, 2023 by 'stache

[royiv 9375]

Derka, you seem really hung up on Norm Macdonald and Billy Madison for some reason. I haven't seen one person make an argument that some clip from a movie or a joke can't be or shouldn't be posted. What I've read is people saying we should strive to not use words that punchdown. Calling something retarded or someone a retard is punching down. Why is it so important to you that this community coalesces around your opinion that it isn't punching down?

I asked you yesterday if you read the link posted by @956 Worldwide from the Special Olympics. Have you taken a moment to do so? What are your thoughts after reading it?

[shadow_operative 15932]

4 minutes ago, royiv said:

Derka, you seem really hung up on Norm Macdonald and Billy Madison for some reason. I haven't seen one person make an argument that some clip from a movie or a joke can't be or shouldn't be posted

as has been repeated, the entire genesis of this discussion stems from a basketball board poster saying that very thing. 

[royiv 9375]

2 minutes ago, shadow_operative said:

as has been repeated, the entire genesis of this discussion stems from a basketball board poster saying that very thing. 

What are your thoughts on the Special Olympics statement on usage of the word? Why do you keep avoiding that in your adult discussion?

Edit to add: As someone who called out the stupid and insensitive meds post, you make it really difficult to defend you.

Edited July 19, 2023 by royiv

[royiv 9375]

On 7/17/2023 at 2:40 PM, UpperWestside said:

 

There’s no good reason, ever, that either of you should be using the r word. It’s beyond offensive to see here or anywhere else. One of you has been open about mental health issues and to see you using that word is embarrassing. Find better words to use or just say you think the author is really reaching to compare it to the NBA contest. 

Derka, I guess I'm not seeing the part where it says Norm Macdonald and Billy Madison are off limits. I read it as you shouldn't sling the word around in casual conversation.

@UpperWestside care to clarify what you meant?

[Da Fino 2785]

3 hours ago, shadow_operative said:

i was recently talking to my mom about a spice girls song 

 

2 hours ago, shadow_operative said:

a whole lotta people here have exposed themselves though

Amen to that

[Brew 3049]

3 hours ago, shadow_operative said:

3)this is (or has largely become) 100% about the absolute soul of this website and its predecessor. period. this all started with someone claiming (and getting lots of support) that "there is no place, in any context, for the words retarded/retard to be used on this site." that is fucking bullshit. that is objectively, factually wrong.

my intentions when starting this thread had nothing to do with this debate about retard/retarded. that incident was simply the genesis for my thoughts about people being offended, it was never the main point. but now that it's gone that way, yeah, i think you've fucking lost your mind if you believe that the office, norm macdonald, kenny powers, shameless, etc don't belong on shaggy. that is absolutely fucking bonkers, and antithetical the very basis of this site's existence.

I’ve been around the run of sites for years, I think you are completely missing the point of everything if you think the soul of the site is built around using those words or others in the same vein. Sure, there is a lot of shit given, a lot of friendly and sometimes unfriendly ribbing, etc but for the most part this site operates without all the bullshit you see on other sites and endures because of the people, the history, the connections, and the discussions that take place daily.

The vast majority of those people are telling you the use of that word isn’t appropriate any more no matter what movie you want to quote, maybe just shut up and listen for once and actually read the responses with an open mind and to educate yourself on the matter.

I’ve given numerous people on here my contact info to answer questions on tax or other things from a business perspective. I only do that because I’m no different here than I am in the real world. You’re not going to find me using any of the derogatory comments with historical context because of what they mean. That doesn’t mean I’m not going to call you a dumbass for some things that you post, but there is a clear difference in the terminology. You have a clear lack of understanding of what derogatory means if you don’t get that.

Edited July 19, 2023 by Brew

[NoName 16408]

On 7/18/2023 at 10:11 AM, Helobious said:

I don’t know any other poster that gets their intelligence insulted as much as I do, which is ironic given by most any metric I’d wager I’m one of the smartest people that posts here.

this is the most Helobious post ever made on this website.

[Dahobbs 17699]

2 hours ago, shadow_operative said:

so according to you, any time you're upset, annoyed, or resentful that means you're offended?

That is one use of the word, yes. Your post however is focused on a slightly more narrowed use of the word, better described by the following definition from the Cambridge Dictionary:

"to cause to be upset or to hurt the feelings of someone, esp. by being rude or showing a lack of respect"

https://dictionary.cambridge.org/us/dictionary/english/offend

Yes, if someone says something that you interpret as rude, insulting, or showing a lack of respect, and you feel "upset, annoyed, or resentful" then you have been offended. 

Quote

so if your five year old kid won't stop making noise and it annoys you, that means you're offended? if your grandma dies and that causes you to be upset, that means that your dead grandma has offended you by dying? if someone gets the job you wanted instead of you and you feel resentful, that means you're offended? that's the stance you're taking here? sorry, but this discussion is a lot more nuanced than that. if you're actually so dense as to argue otherwise then i'm not sure you have the critical thinking skills to add anything meaningful to it.

See above, there are different uses of the word. You're focused on a particular use. And, under that usage, you have most assuredly been offended by some of the things that people have said. For, instance, you're clearly offended that people think you overreact. The problem with your OP and the problem with everything you've said in this thread is that you're unable to take that experience and then empathize with someone else that may be feeling the same over something you have said. 

Quote

this was in my OP. this is what we are specifically talking about. did you read it? do you understand it? or is pointing to the textbook definition of the word literally all you've got? 

I've actually tried to advance the thread by identifying the thing you're struggling to understand. See my two posts below:

On 7/18/2023 at 3:45 PM, Dahobbs said:

Idiot, moron, and imbecile are all insults and thus offensive to whomever they are directed. What the OP and really this whole thread is circling around is that some terms are offensive in ways that make their use, even as an insult, unacceptable. Bigoted words and phrases are in that category because that not only demean the person they are directed at, but are more broadly demeaning to whole groups and predicated on the innate, not chosen, aspects of the group. 

 

23 hours ago, Dahobbs said:

I didn't miss that. Those terms are still insults, so they are offensive. They have just lost all connection to the general group suffering from mental handicaps, so are no longer in that unacceptable category.  

My point is that the thing we as a society are opposed to isn't really offensive words. Rather, we are opposed to particular kinds of offensive words. 

Both of those posts dovetail nicely into your most recent question:

Quote

 

let me ask you this @Dahobbs-

if i asked you, "dahobbs, what do you find offensive?", would you start listing every single thing that annoys you? what's more likely, that you would just list off every single annoyance you've ever experienced, or that you'd say something along the lines of, "profanity, racism, xenophobia", etc? 

 

Let's separate out a couple of concepts. 1) Whether a particular term is offensive, and 2) whether a person is actually offended by their use. 

Any insult is, by definition, offensive. If I call you a motherfucker, a idiot, a whore, a self-centered baby, a babbling bozo, an ignoramus, or a troglodyte, every one of those would be an offensive term in that generally they are capable of or intended to cause you to be upset or hurt your feelings. Whether or not you actually are offended by any of these things depends upon your own reaction. 

However, while all of those terms are offensive, none of them are the special category of offensive that I reference above. They are all personal to you (or to whomever they are directed), but not generally offensive to wider groups. 

Calling someone (or something) a retard is offensive to not only the person to whom it is directed, but also the wider community of the intellectually disabled. You may not personally intend to offend someone when using that word, but you should recognize that it is an offensive term. If you choose to use it, don't be surprised when people get upset, annoyed, resentful, and angry. 

Quote

you know what we're talking about here, but you'd rather be "clever" than just take part in the discussion. it's either that, or an alternative that makes you look even worse. i guess only you know which one it is.

I do know what we're talking about. The problem is that you don't. 

 

Edited July 19, 2023 by Dahobbs

[Brew 3049]

14 minutes ago, Dahobbs said:

Let's separate out a couple of concepts. 1) Whether a particular term is offensive, and 2) whether a person is actually offended by their use. 

Any insult is, by definition, offensive. If I call you a motherfucker, a idiot, a whore, a self-centered baby, a babbling bozo, an ignoramus, or a troglodyte, every one of those would be an offensive term in that generally they are capable of or intended to cause you to be upset or hurt your feelings. Whether or not you actually are offended by any of these things depends upon your own reaction. 

However, while all of those terms are offensive, none of them are the special category of offensive that I reference above. They are all personal to you (or to whomever they are directed), but not generally offensive to wider groups. 

Calling someone (or something) a retard is offensive to not only the person to whom it is directed, but also the wider community of the intellectually disabled. You may not personally intend to offend someone when using that word, but you should recognize that it is an offensive term. If you choose to use it, don't be surprised when people get upset, annoyed, resentful, and angry. 

I do know what we're talking about. The problem is that you don't. 

 

Derka, this post is a very good explanation of the differences that you fail to grasp between the different words used. Maybe read it a couple of times before you just start responding.

[Reynolds Woodcock 4804]

What's really funny is that this entire thing started because derka and ztejas got offended by a female ESPN reporter describing the WNBA three point contest results as breaking a WNBA and NBA record. Derka found that description to be, and I quote, "extra retarded". But sure, this is all about tired-ass Office memes and definitely not about being scolded for using the word as a stand in for dumb, stupid, etc. 

[shadow_operative 15932]

11 minutes ago, Brew said:

Derka, this post is a very good explanation of the differences that you fail to grasp between the different words used. Maybe read it a couple of times before you just start responding.

i don't understand how either of you thinks you can tell me that you know what we're talking about here and that i don't, when i am the one who explicitly specified what we're talking about in the first place. anything that isn't explicitly addressing my original, specifies statement (so, everything dahobbs said after acknowledging exactly what k was specifically talking about, and most everything else that he and others have said) is superfluous.

so many people in this thread have gone off on their own tangents and taken in directions where i never intended it to go, and that's fine, but you don't get to go off on a tangent that isn't germane or specific to the OP and then act like you're still addressing what this post started out as.

[shadow_operative 15932]

6 minutes ago, Reynolds Woodcock said:

Derka found that description to be, and I quote, "extra retarded".

i'll take disingenuous bullshit for $600 alex. i quoted someone else who used the descriptor "retarded" and was responding to his own words in kind. i did not out and out adjudge something to be "retarded" as my own description of choice.

i love how i'm the one guy on this site who has notably *stopped* using the word "retard" and yet people like still try to push this bullshit narrative that i'm simply mad that y'all won't "allow" me to use the word. that's...stupid.

Edited July 19, 2023 by shadow_operative

[Evil Bill Obrien 3300]

1 hour ago, NoName said:

this is the most Helobious post ever made on this website.

[shadow_operative 15932]

2 hours ago, royiv said:

What are your thoughts on the Special Olympics statement on usage of the word? Why do you keep avoiding that in your adult discussion?

Edit to add: As someone who called out the stupid and insensitive meds post, you make it really difficult to defend you.

first off, nothing in this post had anything to do with the post you quoted. so, yeah. not sure what do with that.

second, what in the hell are you talking about re: me "continuously avoiding responding to" something that the special olympics have apparently said? seriously, what are you even talking about? 

finally, defend me from what? from whom? i don't recall ever asking or needing you to defend me from anything. i would definitely settle for you simply keeping up with the discussion and making posts which make any sense or add any substance whatsoever to this conversation.

Edited July 19, 2023 by shadow_operative

[royiv 9375]

You're just being an ass at this point.

[shadow_operative 15932]

3 minutes ago, royiv said:

You're just being an ass at this point.

no, i'm honestly responding to whatever that last post of yours was. a)it in no way addressed the post you quoted and were ostensibly replying to, and b) i have zero clue as to what you are talking about with the rest of your post, specifically this idea that i've been ducking addressing some statement made by the special olympics. i have absolutely no idea what you're talking about. 

Edited July 19, 2023 by shadow_operative

[royiv 9375]

2 minutes ago, shadow_operative said:

no, i'm honestly responding to whatever that last post of yours was. a)it in no way addressed the post you quoted and were ostensibly replying to, and b) i have zero clue as to what you are talking about with the rest of your post, specifically this idea that i've been ducking addressing some statement made by the special olympics. i have absolutely no idea what you're talking about. 

I have tagged the post for you twice. Your adult discussion is like arguing with a petulant child. I can't stand petulant children so I'm tapping out here. You appear to have zero capability for self reflection and empathy yet you want everyone else to possess those qualities when it comes to your mental health issues. 

[Brew 3049]

20 minutes ago, shadow_operative said:

i don't understand how either of you thinks you can tell me that you know what we're talking about here and that i don't, when i am the one who explicitly specified what we're talking about in the first place. anything that isn't explicitly addressing my original, specifies statement (so, everything dahobbs said after acknowledging exactly what k was specifically talking about, and most everything else that he and others have said) is superfluous.

so many people in this thread have gone off on their own tangents and taken in directions where i never intended it to go, and that's fine, but you don't get to go off on a tangent that isn't germane or specific to the OP and then act like you're still addressing what this post started out as.

This one response is the essence of “derka” and the negative connotation it takes when referring to the many way things get derka’d around here. Reread paragraph #1 of post #1. Maybe you forgot where you started. 
 

As far as paragraphs 2 and 3, you’ve clearly been offended by things that have been said in this thread including the meds comment which completely invalidates that whole train of thought. Not to mention the posts you quoted are trying to help you understand “offensive” and you have been involved in that very discussion.

[troph 24913]

44 minutes ago, Brew said:

Derka, this post is a very good explanation of the differences that you fail to grasp between the different words used. Maybe read it a couple of times before you just start responding.

100% this.

[Brew 3049]

11 minutes ago, shadow_operative said:

no, i'm honestly responding to whatever that last post of yours was. a)it in no way addressed the post you quoted and were ostensibly replying to, and b) i have zero clue as to what you are talking about with the rest of your post, specifically this idea that i've been ducking addressing some statement made by the special olympics. i have absolutely no idea what you're talking about. 

You clearly don’t understand the difference between derogatory and just being generally offended. You also don’t care to learn. It’s a waste of time discussing it with you, which is usually how I walk away from one of your threads after getting roped in. 

I thought it was an act at points in the past like a Chad Briscoe or Helo. Clearly it isn’t or you’re just all in on it.

[Celery Man 21004]

Gran Torino is actually a bad movie. People just liked listening to the old racist.

[shadow_operative 15932]

5 minutes ago, Brew said:

You clearly don’t understand the difference between derogatory and just being generally offended.

i don't even understand your premise, or what you're even trying to say. being derogatory and being offended are not only two completely different things, but they're on opposite ends of the spectrum from one another. and i obviously know what being derogatory means, as well as what being offended means. seriously, eh at are you even trying to say? and what is it based off of? 

[shadow_operative 15932]

15 minutes ago, Brew said:

you’ve clearly been offended by things that have been said in this thread including the meds comment which completely invalidates that whole train of thought.

what makes you think the meds comment offended me? was it my single-sentence, tongue in cheek response to the post? or maybe it was my total lack of outrage, or neg rep, or literally anything indicating that it offended me? 

i have referred to that post solely for the purpose of pointing out other people's hypocrisy. the post did not offend me in any way. but uh, keep in telling yourself that you what i'm thinking and feeling better than i do. 👌🏼 

Edited July 19, 2023 by shadow_operative

[Brew 3049]

2 minutes ago, shadow_operative said:

what makes you think the meds comment offended me? was it my single-sentence, tongue in cheek response to the post? or maybe it was my total lack of outrage, or neg rep, or literally anything indicating that it offended me? 

i have referred to that post solely for the purpose of pointing out other people's hypocrisy. the post did not offend me in any way. but uh, keep in telling yourself that you what i'm thinking and feeling better than i do. 👌🏼 

So you think it should be offensive and are just pointing out double digit times that others are posting offensive stuff but personally you’re not offended and just want others to see the hypocrisy in the non offensive post that is actually offensive just not to you?  Got it, thanks for clarifying.

[Dahobbs 17699]

57 minutes ago, shadow_operative said:

i don't understand how either of you thinks you can tell me that you know what we're talking about here and that i don't, when i am the one who explicitly specified what we're talking about in the first place. anything that isn't explicitly addressing my original, specifies statement (so, everything dahobbs said after acknowledging exactly what k was specifically talking about, and most everything else that he and others have said) is superfluous.

so many people in this thread have gone off on their own tangents and taken in directions where i never intended it to go, and that's fine, but you don't get to go off on a tangent that isn't germane or specific to the OP and then act like you're still addressing what this post started out as.

I'm really curious for you to identify anything in my post that is "superfluous." Here, I've broken down your first post:

On 7/18/2023 at 6:16 AM, shadow_operative said:

pretty simple premise here, but i honestly don't understand the idea of being offended.

My post addressed the concept of "being offended" and what it means. 

Quote

the genesis of this thread comes from an incident yesterday where the basketball board got all up in arms because someone said the word "retarded", replete with half the thread rallying behind the idea that it's NEVER ok to use that word/those words, which of course is completely retarded, especially here on surly (not to mention in half the tv shows and movies we celebrate here). here's where i'm going with this:

My post addressed why "retarded" is in the special category of offensive words that we as a society have decided are forboden. 

Quote

I don't understand the concept of being offended. I don't think there's anything that anyone in the world could say that would actually offend me. you could call my mom a whore, tell me i'm a fat bipolar bitch, or make a crass joke about dead babies who tragically died in a house fire- i still don't find any of that to be "offensive" per se. those things might make me mad; i might look down on you, or feel sorry for you if that's how you choose to act; but as far as pearl-clutching, *gasp*, "that's offensive to me" goes? yeah, i honestly just don't get it. i'm way, way too desensitized to stuff like that to get offended. 

My post addressed examples of where you've been offended (e.g., anyone that thinks you overreact). Also, if those things make you mad, you are, by definition, offended. 

Quote

 

i've spent some time thinking about this and i can't remember the last time i felt offended,

Probably in the last 5 minutes or so. 

Quote

 am i delusional?

Yes.

Quote

am i actually offended by these things but i just don't realize it?

Yes.

Quote

i'll hang up and listen now.

Apparently not. 

Edited July 19, 2023 by Dahobbs

[shadow_operative 15932]

6 minutes ago, Brew said:

So you think it should be offensive and are just pointing out double digit times that others are posting offensive stuff but personally you’re not offended and just want others to see the hypocrisy in the non offensive post that is actually offensive just not to you?  Got it, thanks for clarifying.

man a whole bunch of you have trouble reading. i've already answered your question multiple times in this thread, but here it is once more for posterity:

a gang of people who all have mentally disabled loved ones came into this thread and passionately advocated against anyone using any language which even could be used in a derogatory manner towards an ill/handicapped person, even if it wasn't being used in such a way, eg, "that event was retarded."

i have simply pointed out that if these people truly felt that way then they would deem personal attacks on me and/or any other mentally ill person to be equally offensive. however they clearly do not feel that way based on their years long history of failing to admonish the people who take such jabs and pot shots. that gusto and vim and vigor only exists for them when it affects ya then personally, and is not the overarching "morality" that they claim it to be. pretty simple stuff here.

[shadow_operative 15932]

3 minutes ago, Dahobbs said:

I'm really curious for you to identify anything in my post that is "superfluous." Here, I've broken down your first post:

My post addressed the concept of "being offended" and what it means. 

My post addressed why "retarded" is in the special category of offensive words that we as a society have decided are forboden. 

My post addressed examples of where you've been offended (e.g., anyone that thinks you overreact). Also, if those things make you mad, you are, by definition, offended. 

Probably in the last 5 minutes or so. 

Yes.

Yes.

Apparently not. 

we are going in circles. i specified exactly what i was talking about in my OP, and i have repeatedly re-posted it when people like you stray way off course. you continue to do nothing but completely ignore this, and then tell me that i'm taking offense to a bunch of posts in this thread, again, based on your own tangential musings, and not my specific definition from my own OP. every single thing you're typing is superfluous.

bottom line, you have zero interest i honestly addressing what i've written, and are clearly on some tangential crusade to make this about whatever you want it to be about, and not what my OP specifically states. i'll leave you to that. have fun.