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Posted (edited)

THIS PAGE FUCKING SUCKS

It's like we starting eating our own - Without Japs or a Cheese Henge. Focus on the real enemy. Those dilatants in the look what I made, with their fancy china and upper class photogenic food that you would actually feed to people in public.

 

Edited by Jameslaw121
ok - so the last page sucked... sorry continue on
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Posted
31 minutes ago, Brisketexan said:

I've fed Norwegians.  They think onion is a spice, and you best not use too much of it.  Dear god, those nordics can't handle ANY spice.  I mean, literally, ANY spice.  It's pathetic.  And as a result, their food -- both there, and the versions imported to the upper midwest -- is flat-out godawful.  There's only so much you can do with potatoes, heavy cream, cabbage, and unseasoned meat.

My aunt won’t eat food cooked next to onions.  It’s maddening.

Posted
1 hour ago, Al_4_ISU said:

I hate loose meats.  Taverns?  Different story.

If anyone thinks I’m bothered by slamming the blandness of traditional Midwestern food, they’re wrong.  I’ve been pushing back on that shit since I was a pre-teen.  You are preaching to my choir.

Full confession.  When I was about 15 yrs old I used to work for a German fella named Hefner.  His wife Olga Mae called them burger, but they were browned hamburger mixed with mayonnaise.  Loose meat.  I would have stormed Normandy rather than eating that.  

Posted
1 hour ago, Braff Zacklin said:

"Loose meat"--sounds like yet another sandwich inspired by Hope Solo, following in the footsteps of the Arby's original roast beef, of course.

Jodi Arias says hi

Posted (edited)

There were beans in my chili, but my wife asks me to put beans in there, and she is having our second child tomorrow so clearly I’ve been laid at least twice which is  pretty great. 

Edited by Etexhorn13
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Posted (edited)
4 minutes ago, Etexhorn13 said:

There were beans in my chili, but my wife asks me to do that, and she is having our second child tomorrow so clearly I’ve been laid at least twice which is  pretty great. 

Dear God.  That delivery room is going to be plastered with "chili" out of both ends.

Edited by tigol
Congrats, btw.
Posted
36 minutes ago, Etexhorn13 said:

There were beans in my chili, but my wife asks me to put beans in there, and she is having our second child tomorrow so clearly I’ve been laid at least twice which is  pretty great. 

Not so fast, my friend.

efb61eb5-d577-4f1b-812b-54e28c5986e2_scr

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Posted
3 hours ago, Brisketexan said:

I've fed Norwegians.  They think onion is a spice, and you best not use too much of it.  Dear god, those nordics can't handle ANY spice.  I mean, literally, ANY spice.  It's pathetic.  And as a result, their food -- both there, and the versions imported to the upper midwest -- is flat-out godawful.  There's only so much you can do with potatoes, heavy cream, cabbage, and unseasoned meat.

I’m 1/4 Norwegian and I like my shit hot. Like these leftovers from a Mexican joint in Leadville. 
 

IMG_4523.thumb.jpeg.d2c946dab1d1932e12b8b42866f33357.jpeg

 

Best carnitas ever. 

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Posted

My freshman year in jester was in a shared bathroom suite. We’d stack up that weeks pizza boxes (Gumby’s, papa John’s, the hut, etc) up under the sink in the connecting bathroom. I may have raided those boxes whilst hungover on an occasion or two.

Posted
I've fed Norwegians.  They think onion is a spice, and you best not use too much of it.  Dear god, those nordics can't handle ANY spice.  I mean, literally, ANY spice.  It's pathetic.  And as a result, their food -- both there, and the versions imported to the upper midwest -- is flat-out godawful.  There's only so much you can do with potatoes, heavy cream, cabbage, and unseasoned meat.

They eat fucking lutefisk. I don’t think a seal blubber eating Eskimo would eat that shit. If you’ve never had it it’s like a hunk of nasty fish aged in a state park pit toilet on a 106 degree day.
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Posted
3 hours ago, Judge Roybeanbag said:

Full confession.  When I was about 15 yrs old I used to work for a German fella named Hefner.  His wife Olga Mae called them burger, but they were browned hamburger mixed with mayonnaise.  Loose meat.  I would have stormed Normandy rather than eating that.  

That’s a fucking nightmare 

Posted
8 hours ago, Al_4_ISU said:

That’s a fucking nightmare 

In her defense there was a crew of 8 or so of us working out in the field, and she’d bring us food for lunch.  But it was basically a manwich, except instead of manwich sauce it was mayo and sometimes ketchup mixed in with the ground meat.  My brother and I still laugh/cringe about it.  

Posted
12 hours ago, Judge Roybeanbag said:

Full confession.  When I was about 15 yrs old I used to work for a German fella named Hefner.  His wife Olga Mae called them burger, but they were browned hamburger mixed with mayonnaise.  Loose meat.  I would have stormed Normandy rather than eating that.  

I went to work for her that summer

A teenage kid so far from home…

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Posted
45 minutes ago, Judge Roybeanbag said:

In her defense there was a crew of 8 or so of us working out in the field, and she’d bring us food for lunch.  But it was basically a manwich, except instead of manwich sauce it was mayo and sometimes ketchup mixed in with the ground meat.  My brother and I still laugh/cringe about it.  

Yeah, that type of food is easy to make en masse, but it's not hard to come up with a better binder/sauce.  A good sloppy joe/tavern is tough to beat, but when it has either a bad sauce (like this) or no sauce (like a traditional maid rite/loose meat) it sucks.

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Posted
15 hours ago, Judge Roybeanbag said:

Full confession.  When I was about 15 yrs old I used to work for a German fella named Hefner.  His wife Olga Mae called them burger, but they were browned hamburger mixed with mayonnaise.  Loose meat.  I would have stormed Normandy rather than eating that.  

that sounds good.  ground beef and mayonnaise?  I don’t understand, what’s not to like?

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Posted
4 hours ago, Judge Roybeanbag said:

In her defense there was a crew of 8 or so of us working out in the field, and she’d bring us food for lunch.  But it was basically a manwich, except instead of manwich sauce it was mayo and sometimes ketchup mixed in with the ground meat.  My brother and I still laugh/cringe about it.  

a lot of people think this is basically big mac sauce.  those people are wrong.  big mac sauce has no tomato in it.  the color is from turmeric, paprika, and caramel

 

Quote

 

Big Mac Sauce

 

Ingredients: Soybean Oil, Sweet Relish (diced Pickles, Sugar, High Fructose Corn Syrup, Distilled Vinegar, Salt, Corn Syrup, Xanthan Gum, Calcium Chloride, Spice Extractives), Water, Egg Yolks, Distilled Vinegar, Spices, Onion Powder, Salt, Propylene Glycol Alginate, Garlic Powder, Vegetable Protein (hydrolyzed Corn, Soy And Wheat), Sugar, Caramel Color, Turmeric, Extractives Of Paprika, Soy Lecithin.

 

 

 

 

Posted
16 minutes ago, elfenix said:

a lot of people think this is basically big mac sauce.  those people are wrong.  big mac sauce has no tomato in it.  the color is from turmeric, paprika, and caramel

 

 

 

 

That's a lot of stuff in that sauce.  My @futureman special sauce is thousand island dressing, with some extra mayo added in.  Don't judge me.

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Posted

as long as we’re on the topic I’ll say that I have lately been enjoying the hell out of this.  decided to get a little fancy and divert from blue plate/duke’s/hellman’s.  this shit is very good.  futureman approved. 

IMG_4291.jpeg

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Posted
21 hours ago, elfenix said:

a lot of people think this is basically big mac sauce.  those people are wrong.  big mac sauce has no tomato in it.  the color is from turmeric, paprika, and caramel

 

 

 

 

 

21 hours ago, Al_4_ISU said:

I always thought Big Mac Sauce was just Thousand Island/Russian dressing.

 

21 hours ago, Judge Roybeanbag said:

That's a lot of stuff in that sauce.  My @futureman special sauce is thousand island dressing, with some extra mayo added in.  Don't judge me.

If you don't like eating trash and filler:

https://keytomylime.com/big-mac-sauce-recipe/

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Posted
31 minutes ago, Al_4_ISU said:

I'm not a fan of the mayo/ketchup combo so I kinda steer clear of thousand island/russian/big mac sauces.

In Argentina, the mayo/ketchup combo is called "salsa golf," and they put that shit on EVERYTHING.  Of course, they also think black pepper is spicy, so there's that.

Posted (edited)
2 minutes ago, Brisketexan said:

In Argentina, the mayo/ketchup combo is called "salsa golf," and they put that shit on EVERYTHING.  Of course, they also think black pepper is spicy, so there's that.

That's gotta be a holdover from all the old Nazis.

I can't fully explain my aversion to mayo/ketchup.  I'm not wild about mayo as a standalone condiment, but I'm fine with it being a base ingredient for something more interesting.  I'm fine with ketchup in certain applications (often very weird ones, like fried fish) but it's not one of my main condiments.  I don't completely avoid other, but I just don't like it when they come together.

Edited by Al_4_ISU
Posted
Just now, Frank The Tank said:

I also enjoy the tangy zip on certain things. For instance, a scrambled egg sandwich with miracle whip on white bread has been a go-to quick meal for me since childhood. Dad would enjoy this thread. 

I was drunkenly introduced to fried egg/mayo sandwiches on a house boat in Wisconsin last summer.  Toss a little hot sauce in there and it didn't disappoint.

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Posted
On 6/29/2023 at 7:22 AM, Al_4_ISU said:

Yeah, that type of food is easy to make en masse, but it's not hard to come up with a better binder/sauce.  A good sloppy joe/tavern is tough to beat, but when it has either a bad sauce (like this) or no sauce (like a traditional maid rite/loose meat) it sucks.

My grandmother (German ancestry, Great Depression/WWII generation) used canned gumbo and some mustard as a base for her sloppy joes. I have never seen something like that anywhere else but her kitchen. 

Posted
10 minutes ago, Cheeseweasel said:

(unsubscribe)

Maybe we'll have Miracle Whip Week next week on this thread to coincide with our Nation's birthday. You going to unsubscribe from America?

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Posted (edited)
5 minutes ago, Kennythetiger said:

My grandmother (German ancestry, Great Depression/WWII generation) used canned gumbo and some mustard as a base for her sloppy joes. I have never seen something like that anywhere else but her kitchen. 

My grandmother is of the same ilk, but the young end of the Depression/WWII era, and that fits her approach to cooking (she had to feed 6 kids - 5 boys).

But the canned gumbo is not something she'd have kept on hand, and sounds intriguing.  I'd definitely eat your grandma's sloppy joe.

Edited by Al_4_ISU
Posted
6 minutes ago, Kennythetiger said:

That’s what Brat said. 
I’ll hunt around for the recipe 

I recently had sloppy joes with large chunks of celery in them, and it was pretty great.

Posted
1 hour ago, Al_4_ISU said:

My grandmother is of the same ilk, but the young end of the Depression/WWII era, and that fits her approach to cooking (she had to feed 6 kids - 5 boys).

But the canned gumbo is not something she'd have kept on hand, and sounds intriguing.  I'd definitely eat your grandma's sloppy joe.

I think I have mentioned this to you before, but she also used butter as a condiment on our ham sandwiches, something else that I haven’t seen since her passing. Weird as shit to me growing up, but makes perfect sense now, as they milked cows through the 30s and 40s. Homemade butter was probably all that they had. 
She and Grandpa also belonged to some sort of dairy cooperative, from which Grandma would order fucking huge bricks of pre-sliced cheese. Which she froze, along with everything else. 

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Posted
2 minutes ago, Kennythetiger said:

I think I have mentioned this to you before, but she also used butter as a condiment on our ham sandwiches, something else that I haven’t seen since her passing. Weird as shit to me growing up, but makes perfect sense now, as they milked cows through the 30s and 40s. Homemade butter was probably all that they had. 
She and Grandpa also belonged to some sort of dairy cooperative, from which Grandma would order fucking huge bricks of pre-sliced cheese. Which she froze, along with everything else. 

Butter on sandwiches was something my grandparents did too.  My mom and aunt would always do it when making sack lunches for our farm employees, and you still see it at church dinners and shit like that.

I never do it myself, but I've eaten many a sandwich with butter on it in my life.  Our school district would have butter and white bread sandwiches set out that you could take without it counting towards your punch for lunch that day.  I remember hammering those free butter sandwiches with some mustard.

Posted
1 hour ago, Al_4_ISU said:

I recently had sloppy joes with large chunks of celery in them, and it was pretty great.

Sure it wasn’t a bolognese sandwich?  A bolognese sloppy Joe sounds pretty fucking good, actually. 

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Posted
Sure it wasn’t a bolognese sandwich?  A bolognese sloppy Joe sounds pretty fucking good, actually. 

I’m sure. Here’s the recipe
76d913c93327fb32c306f7c9b52f5414.jpg

But I would hammer a bolognese sandwich

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