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Poetic Justice: How Texas puts an end to the monster they created

Sir Ulrich

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Sir Ulrich

Sir Ulrich 5,187

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Here we go again Texas vs Bama Part Deux but this time we are rolling into the hostile territory of Bryant Denny Stadium. Last year at this time we were 20 point dogs and didn’t stand a chance against Saban as he and his 5 star fueled Death Star came to Austin. This team included 3 first rounders and 8 total picks in the first 2 days of the 2023 draft but they needed to yet again injure a Texas QB and get some Big 12 ref magic to squeak out a 1 point victory.  Was this a case of Saban slipping a little bit or was Texas and Steve Sarkisian finally pulling out of their decades of mediocrity? Based on how each team finished the season it seems like more of the former as Bama lost to Tennessee for the first time in Saban’s tenure while LSU and the fighting Kelly’s beat them in an OT mid-off. During this time Texas finished 7-4 with a couple of big wins and a couple embarrassing losses. 

To pull off the biggest win in years Texas has to do to buck the following trends:


1.    Texas mediocrity: For the past 13 years Texas has been the laughingstock of CFB and failed to live up to expectations exactly once (2018) but even then lost 4 games including a laugher to Maryland. Can Texas finally win a monster on the road and officially claim to be back for good?

2.    Sevin Win Sark: Out of his 7 full seasons as a head coach Sark has won more than 7 games only 3 times. Even his biggest backers here couldn’t name a matchup of this magnitude that he has coached his team to a win in. Will he be able to finally get a big win on the road and a new nickname by years end? 

3.    Saban’s Dominance at Home: Saban at Alabama has won 103 and lost just 8 games at home since taking over in 2007.  The current streak sits at 21 games since a team last walked out of Tuscaloosa with a win. Has Saban finally jumped the shark 

All the daunting trends and statistics aside here is why Texas is going to shut up all of the talking heads and pull out a dominating victory in Tuscaloosa:

1.    We’re fucking Texas: Other fanbases and media will laugh at the notion that the Texas decal on the helmet means anything but disappointment but since the beginning of time Texas has dared to play big games and more often than not came out ahead. Texas has a winning record against every other Blue Blood except USC and ND. If you exclude the annual matchup with OU the total record is 25-21. But what about on the road you ask? Texas in 9-8 in true road games against the non OU Blue Bloods. No University of Texas player, coach, or fan is going to be fazed by the atmosphere, this type of game is why you choose the University of Texas. 

2.    Saban’s Swan Song: It is no secret that Alabama has lost their CFB throne to Georgia over the last 2 seasons but they are still 1B in the CFB pecking order. Saban has built up a lot of trust in his program to warrant the #3 ranking in a year when they lost a Heisman QB, all world defender, and do it all RB. Recruiting rankings suggest they just reloaded and will keep rolling but this is not your Uncle’s Alabama. To replace Bryce Young they tapped Jalen Milroe to assume the throne at QB despite their best efforts to buy an elite QB in the portal. If his game against the aggies is any indication than it will be a long night for Saban in Tuscaloosa.  

3.    Poetic Justice: Since that night at the Rose Bowl Texas has coveted a seat at the table that they once had a standing reservation at. Year after year we have had to sit by and watch an Alabama dynasty reel off championship after championship that was propelled by an injury to a Texas QB. Every dominant program has an alpha and omega when the world either knows you have arrived or that the end is near. In tandem the alpha and omega happened for Alabama and Texas on January 7th, 2010 while millions looked on. This Saturday will be the bookend moment for both of these programs as Texas beacons to the world that they are in fact back while leaving Alabama faithful wondering what will be next for their beloved program. 


The stars are aligned for a big night for the Horns in Tuscaloosa this weekend. Quinn has an opportunity to show us why he is the highest rated QB of all time and cement his legacy as a Texas QB. Sark is gunning to come full circle from wonderkid when he was hired at UW to a seasoned veteran HC with a career defining year. This team fucks and will prove it on the field in primetime. See yall in Tuscaloosa, I will be in U4-CC. Hook ‘em

“The pride and winning tradition of The University of Texas will not be entrusted to the weak or the timid”

Edited by Sir Ulrich
Name change
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WinningIsHard

WinningIsHard 4,030

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In on page one, taking a stance so when I come back and laugh at this later I don’t get negged by a charmin soft little bitch that also happens to be a narcissist. Texas just needs to keep this game close, milroe runs like a fast fullback and that scares me to death based off history. I’d love to win in Tuscaloosa but it doesn’t seem likely. 

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closetojumping

closetojumping 62,630

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Dude, you could have just used any other title and been an original with it. Now it's like "welp, i guess i won't be doing that."

Also, @WinningIsHard , I trend way more directionally to sociopathic than narcissistic. Get a grip on proper use of overkilled buzzwords that you've adopted from social media.

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orange dream

orange dream 1,247

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1 minute ago, closetojumping said:

Dude, you could have just used any other title and been an original with it. Now it's like "welp, i guess i won't be doing that."

Also, @WinningIsHard , I trend way more directionally to sociopathic than narcissistic. Get a grip on proper use of overkilled buzzwords that you've adopted from social media.

hey at least he didn't steal "ball gargling" from you.

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  • Sir Ulrich changed the title to Poetic Justice: How Texas puts an end to the monster they created
Sir Ulrich

Sir Ulrich 5,187

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19 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

Dude, you could have just used any other title and been an original with it. Now it's like "welp, i guess i won't be doing that."

Also, @WinningIsHard , I trend way more directionally to sociopathic than narcissistic. Get a grip on proper use of overkilled buzzwords that you've adopted from social media.

I got you 🫡. The bones of the post didnt match the name anyhow.

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Doc Daneeka

Doc Daneeka 6,769

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31 minutes ago, WinningIsHard said:

In on page one, taking a stance so when I come back and laugh at this later I don’t get negged by a charmin soft little bitch that also happens to be a narcissist. Texas just needs to keep this game close, milroe runs like a fast fullback and that scares me to death based off history. I’d love to win in Tuscaloosa but it doesn’t seem likely. 

I feel like Texas is fast enough now to contend with a fullback, even a fast one. Let’s see if Milroe can be effective passing against Texas’ defense. I don’t think he will be. 

If the OL can make Alabama play the run honestly and not let them get too much pressure without sacrificing coverage, that should be enough.

Protect the ball, don’t give up or set up cheap scores, win, come back to “Texas won despite Sarkisian posts,” and get ready for Wyoming. 

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Vertigo

Vertigo 20,276

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1 hour ago, Sir Ulrich said:

Here we go again Texas vs Bama Part Deux but this time we are rolling into the hostile territory of Bryant Denny Stadium. Last year at this time we were 20 point dogs and didn’t stand a chance against Saban as he and his 5 star fueled Death Star came to Austin. This team included 3 first rounders and 8 total picks in the first 2 days of the 2023 draft but they needed to yet again injure a Texas QB and get some Big 12 ref magic to squeak out a 1 point victory.  Was this a case of Saban slipping a little bit or was Texas and Steve Sarkisian finally pulling out of their decades of mediocrity? Based on how each team finished the season it seems like more of the former as Bama lost to Tennessee for the first time in Saban’s tenure while LSU and the fighting Kelly’s beat them in an OT mid-off. During this time Texas finished 7-4 with a couple of big wins and a couple embarrassing losses. 

To pull off the biggest win in years Texas has to do to buck the following trends:


1.    Texas mediocrity: For the past 13 years Texas has been the laughingstock of CFB and failed to live up to expectations exactly once (2018) but even then lost 4 games including a laugher to Maryland. Can Texas finally win a monster on the road and officially claim to be back for good?

2.    Sevin Win Sark: Out of his 7 full seasons as a head coach Sark has won more than 7 games only 3 times. Even his biggest backers here couldn’t name a matchup of this magnitude that he has coached his team to a win in. Will he be able to finally get a big win on the road and a new nickname by years end? 

3.    Saban’s Dominance at Home: Saban at Alabama has won 103 and lost just 8 games at home since taking over in 2007.  The current streak sits at 21 games since a team last walked out of Tuscaloosa with a win. Has Saban finally jumped the shark 

All the daunting trends and statistics aside here is why Texas is going to shut up all of the talking heads and pull out a dominating victory in Tuscaloosa:

1.    We’re fucking Texas: Other fanbases and media will laugh at the notion that the Texas decal on the helmet means anything but disappointment but since the beginning of time Texas has dared to play big games and more often than not came out ahead. Texas has a winning record against every other Blue Blood except USC and ND. If you exclude the annual matchup with OU the total record is 25-21. But what about on the road you ask? Texas in 9-8 in true road games against the non OU Blue Bloods. No University of Texas player, coach, or fan is going to be fazed by the atmosphere, this type of game is why you choose the University of Texas. 

2.    Saban’s Swan Song: It is no secret that Alabama has lost their CFB thrown to Georgia over the last 2 seasons but they are still 1B in the CFB pecking order. Saban has built up a lot of trust in his program to warrant the #3 ranking in a year when they lost a Heisman QB, all world defender, and do it all RB. Recruiting rankings suggest they just reloaded and will keep rolling but this is not your Uncle’s Alabama. To replace Bryce Young they tapped Jalen Milroe to assume the throne at QB despite their best efforts to buy an elite QB in the portal. If his game against the aggies is any indication than it will be a long night for Saban in Tuscaloosa.  

3.    Poetic Justice: Since that night at the Rose Bowl Texas has coveted a seat at the table that they once had a standing reservation at. Year after year we have had to sit by and watch an Alabama dynasty reel off championship after championship that was propelled by an injury to a Texas QB. Every dominant program has an alpha and omega when the world either knows you have arrived or that the end is near. In tandem the alpha and omega happened for Alabama and Texas on January 7th, 2010 while millions looked on. This Saturday will be the bookend moment for both of these programs as Texas beacons to the world that they are in fact back while leaving Alabama faithful wondering what will be next for their beloved program. 


The stars are aligned for a big night for the Horns in Tuscaloosa this weekend. Quinn has an opportunity to show us why he is the highest rated QB of all time and cement his legacy as a Texas QB. Sark is gunning to come full circle from wonderkid when he was hired at UW to a seasoned veteran HC with a career defining year. This team fucks and will prove it on the field in primetime. See yall in Tuscaloosa, I will be in U4-CC. Hook ‘em

“The pride and winning tradition of The University of Texas will not be entrusted to the weak or the timid”

If I am looking at this with the trained eye, none of the reasons that you listed for us to win are actual reasons. It was a noble effort reminiscent of the fat girl on prom night, but here are some reasons that I think we will win:

1. Texas has the depth at DLine to withstand the Bama run focused offense. Texas is one of maybe three schools in the country that can line up and play Bama straight up in the run game. Not only do we have the front line talent, but we also have a deep rotation at the DT spot with high quality talent that can hold the point of attack. I expect to see them move some guys around and to the edges in rotation for this game to spell Burke and Sorrell including Collins, Bledsoe, Hill and maybe even Zac Swansen in a pinch. I was pleasantly surprised by Burke's toughness at the point of attack against rice. Yeah yeah, it was Rice, but Burke has surprising leverage and very quick lacross powered feet to evade blockers when needed. I saw him duck through and dodge double teams multiple times on Saturday with both guys whiffing on him completely.  

2. Our defensive backfield is going to give Milroe all kinds of problems. We will be able to play any kind of defense we want to play and know that we have the dudes to execute it in the backend. None of Bama's receivers feel like a true problem, and that will allow us to lock them up more in coverage with less people committed to the pass. Catalon and Thompson will be able to take turns playing down closer to the box in run support, Barron and Watts can be used as blitzers, and we can roll back into shallow zones with Catalon, Barron, and Watts all looking in towards the QB to help on scrambles. 

3. Skill position superiority. We are better than Bama at the WR, TE, and QB with a good set of complimentary running backs to what Sark wants to do. Remember last year how much Sarkisian used the RBs in the pass game? Well, Brooks, Robinson, and Blue can all execute that really effectively. Baxter has hands as well, I just don't know his availability. If he does play, he should get 20+ carries against Bama. When we line up in three wides, that is our most potent formation. You can't double any of the receivers or you will leave the middle open for Sanders. You can't play zone or Worthy and Whittington will torch it. You can't play press man or Mitchell and Worthy will beat it. If you go to a nickel or dime look, then you lighten the box and give the running game a chance to get traction. 

4. Offensive Line. Yes I know, some of you just spit out your drink. Consider this.. Last year, we had two true freshman and a true sophomore starting in their second games against Bama. We held the point of attack admirably under the circumstances. Last week was bad. That means Flood and Sark are going to be all up in their asses the entire week making sure that we don't get our balls kicked right up the middle. Last year, Sark did a masterful job of scheming to take pressure off of the OLine. I expect him to do the same against them this year. I also expect our starting lineup to be Banks, Umeozulu, Majors, Hutson, Jones. Neto was just better than Robertson last week. He moved guys in the run game, and played pretty cleanly in pass pro. Hutson coming back gives more experience to the line in pass protection. We can't afford to have a hobbled Campbell to go along with a mentally struggling Campbell, but I do expect him to get more shots throughout the season. Add a year of strength and weight, and subtract a couple of first and second round picks from the defense, and I think the line has a better performance than most people think. 

 

 

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Tex Long

Tex Long 4,389

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25 minutes ago, Doc Daneeka said:

Let’s see if Milroe can be effective passing against Texas’ defense. I don’t think he will be.

This right here. Claims have been made that Nick is bringing "bully ball" this year, which sorta implies we won't see much in the way of passing. The DL and LB group looks like a strength for us, so I think the game will be decided by whether or not Bama (not necessarily Milroe) can pass. If not, I like our chances.

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Doc Daneeka

Doc Daneeka 6,769

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1 minute ago, Tex Long said:

This right here. Claims have been made that Nick is bringing "bully ball" this year, which soprta implies we won't see much in the way of passing. The DL and LB group looks like a strength for us, so I think the game will be decided by whether or not Bama (not necessarily Milroe) can pass. If not, I like our chances.

I think I’d be in favor of seeing some bully ball directed at Sweat and his guys. I think they might, too. 

Texas is not lacking in the secondary. That’s a good point that Milroe might not be the finisher, though. 

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Atticus

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They will have to throw the ball to win the game. Hopefully our run defense will allow us to defend the pass without making it too easy for Milroe. 
I think the best run defense will be a strong early scoring offense though. We score in bunches early, and their execution window becomes very tight. I believe Milroe crumbles under that pressure.

Of course, we could always just knock Milroe out of the game in the first quarter…

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Sir Ulrich

Sir Ulrich 5,187

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36 minutes ago, Vertigo said:

If I am looking at this with the trained eye, none of the reasons that you listed for us to win are actual reasons. It was a noble effort reminiscent of the fat girl on prom night, but here are some reasons that I think we will win:

1. Texas has the depth at DLine to withstand the Bama run focused offense. Texas is one of maybe three schools in the country that can line up and play Bama straight up in the run game. Not only do we have the front line talent, but we also have a deep rotation at the DT spot with high quality talent that can hold the point of attack. I expect to see them move some guys around and to the edges in rotation for this game to spell Burke and Sorrell including Collins, Bledsoe, Hill and maybe even Zac Swansen in a pinch. I was pleasantly surprised by Burke's toughness at the point of attack against rice. Yeah yeah, it was Rice, but Burke has surprising leverage and very quick lacross powered feet to evade blockers when needed. I saw him duck through and dodge double teams multiple times on Saturday with both guys whiffing on him completely.  

2. Our defensive backfield is going to give Milroe all kinds of problems. We will be able to play any kind of defense we want to play and know that we have the dudes to execute it in the backend. None of Bama's receivers feel like a true problem, and that will allow us to lock them up more in coverage with less people committed to the pass. Catalon and Thompson will be able to take turns playing down closer to the box in run support, Barron and Watts can be used as blitzers, and we can roll back into shallow zones with Catalon, Barron, and Watts all looking in towards the QB to help on scrambles. 

3. Skill position superiority. We are better than Bama at the WR, TE, and QB with a good set of complimentary running backs to what Sark wants to do. Remember last year how much Sarkisian used the RBs in the pass game? Well, Brooks, Robinson, and Blue can all execute that really effectively. Baxter has hands as well, I just don't know his availability. If he does play, he should get 20+ carries against Bama. When we line up in three wides, that is our most potent formation. You can't double any of the receivers or you will leave the middle open for Sanders. You can't play zone or Worthy and Whittington will torch it. You can't play press man or Mitchell and Worthy will beat it. If you go to a nickel or dime look, then you lighten the box and give the running game a chance to get traction. 

4. Offensive Line. Yes I know, some of you just spit out your drink. Consider this.. Last year, we had two true freshman and a true sophomore starting in their second games against Bama. We held the point of attack admirably under the circumstances. Last week was bad. That means Flood and Sark are going to be all up in their asses the entire week making sure that we don't get our balls kicked right up the middle. Last year, Sark did a masterful job of scheming to take pressure off of the OLine. I expect him to do the same against them this year. I also expect our starting lineup to be Banks, Umeozulu, Majors, Hutson, Jones. Neto was just better than Robertson last week. He moved guys in the run game, and played pretty cleanly in pass pro. Hutson coming back gives more experience to the line in pass protection. We can't afford to have a hobbled Campbell to go along with a mentally struggling Campbell, but I do expect him to get more shots throughout the season. Add a year of strength and weight, and subtract a couple of first and second round picks from the defense, and I think the line has a better performance than most people think. 

 

 

Love the insight and agree on your points. I didn't want to sound like another amateur analyst and took the hopeful fan approach. But I stand by the fact that big time programs fare better in big time games regardless of recent history (Strong years excluded for obvious reasons). 

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Vertigo

Vertigo 20,276

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7 minutes ago, Sir Ulrich said:

Love the insight and agree on your points. I didn't want to sound like another amateur analyst and took the hopeful fan approach. But I stand by the fact that big time programs fare better in big time games regardless of recent history (Strong years excluded for obvious reasons). 

I was just giving you a hard time. I am incapable of being nice to people on the internet. 

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Rip76

Rip76 4,925

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5 hours ago, Vertigo said:

If I am looking at this with the trained eye, none of the reasons that you listed for us to win are actual reasons. It was a noble effort reminiscent of the fat girl on prom night, but here are some reasons that I think we will win:

1. Texas has the depth at DLine to withstand the Bama run focused offense. Texas is one of maybe three schools in the country that can line up and play Bama straight up in the run game. Not only do we have the front line talent, but we also have a deep rotation at the DT spot with high quality talent that can hold the point of attack. I expect to see them move some guys around and to the edges in rotation for this game to spell Burke and Sorrell including Collins, Bledsoe, Hill and maybe even Zac Swansen in a pinch. I was pleasantly surprised by Burke's toughness at the point of attack against rice. Yeah yeah, it was Rice, but Burke has surprising leverage and very quick lacross powered feet to evade blockers when needed. I saw him duck through and dodge double teams multiple times on Saturday with both guys whiffing on him completely.  

2. Our defensive backfield is going to give Milroe all kinds of problems. We will be able to play any kind of defense we want to play and know that we have the dudes to execute it in the backend. None of Bama's receivers feel like a true problem, and that will allow us to lock them up more in coverage with less people committed to the pass. Catalon and Thompson will be able to take turns playing down closer to the box in run support, Barron and Watts can be used as blitzers, and we can roll back into shallow zones with Catalon, Barron, and Watts all looking in towards the QB to help on scrambles. 

3. Skill position superiority. We are better than Bama at the WR, TE, and QB with a good set of complimentary running backs to what Sark wants to do. Remember last year how much Sarkisian used the RBs in the pass game? Well, Brooks, Robinson, and Blue can all execute that really effectively. Baxter has hands as well, I just don't know his availability. If he does play, he should get 20+ carries against Bama. When we line up in three wides, that is our most potent formation. You can't double any of the receivers or you will leave the middle open for Sanders. You can't play zone or Worthy and Whittington will torch it. You can't play press man or Mitchell and Worthy will beat it. If you go to a nickel or dime look, then you lighten the box and give the running game a chance to get traction. 

4. Offensive Line. Yes I know, some of you just spit out your drink. Consider this.. Last year, we had two true freshman and a true sophomore starting in their second games against Bama. We held the point of attack admirably under the circumstances. Last week was bad. That means Flood and Sark are going to be all up in their asses the entire week making sure that we don't get our balls kicked right up the middle. Last year, Sark did a masterful job of scheming to take pressure off of the OLine. I expect him to do the same against them this year. I also expect our starting lineup to be Banks, Umeozulu, Majors, Hutson, Jones. Neto was just better than Robertson last week. He moved guys in the run game, and played pretty cleanly in pass pro. Hutson coming back gives more experience to the line in pass protection. We can't afford to have a hobbled Campbell to go along with a mentally struggling Campbell, but I do expect him to get more shots throughout the season. Add a year of strength and weight, and subtract a couple of first and second round picks from the defense, and I think the line has a better performance than most people think. 

 

 

#3.

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BigHorn'13

BigHorn'13 3,363

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5 hours ago, Ghost of Shag said:

some blue bell ice cream.

What the ever living fuck is wrong with you?

1. Find an heb that's open

2. Go to the freezer section and pickup some creamy creations

3. ???

4. Profit

3 hours ago, TrashMaster G said:

Literally? Pretty sure those actions would land our guys in jail.

Sodomy alone is enough for the electric chair in Alabama

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Nicole44

Nicole44 22,059

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Sometimes, there’s a team, and I’m talking about the Longhorns here. Sometimes there’s a team, well, they’re the team for their time and place. They fit right in there. And even though they’ve been an underachieving team—and the Horns have been most certainly that, over the years. Quite possibly they have had some of the biggest underachieving teams  in the Big 12. Which would place them high in the running for some of the most underachieving rosters in the FBS. But sometimes, there’s a team, sometimes there’s a team.

 

 

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