Dallas Cowboys Metathread - Oh No We Suck Again!

[FunkSoulBrother 931]

7 minutes ago, dcar00 said:

Jerry's not gonna fire the thumb, even though he should.  He doesn't want to deal with the interview/hiring "process" again.  It is easier just to run it back.  he doesn't give a fuck as long as the money rolls in.

Dude couldn't even fire JG. He just chose not to renew his contract. No way he firing McCarthy.

[PhillyHorn1 79]

19 minutes ago, ConferenceRoom said:

Well, at least we aren’t this guy. 

Funny coming from a Coward fan

[PhillyHorn1 79]

10 minutes ago, InkaUtexas said:

Um, Oilers.... Oliers is an appetizer at Olive Garden I think.

Yes. I misspelled oilers, fuck I do like those oliers

[TrashMaster G 17,558]

1 hour ago, Surly Bevo said:

Jerry's accountants thank you for your support.

Jerry hasn't received a penny from me in over 25 years. 

I won't buy a Cowboys anything until he's dead.

[petscii 1,189]

2 hours ago, TrashMaster G said:

Jerry hasn't received a penny from me in over 25 years. 

I won't buy a Cowboys anything until he's dead.

It'll be longer than that since the kid will will run the team into the ground another 30-40 years.  

[Fastbreak 3,985]

It sucks to get embarrassed by a below-average team like the Packers, but all this showed me was the 49er blowout was going to happen again. This team sucked in every big game they played this year except the Lions game, I guess.
Honestly, even though Dak sucked, the defense was horrible. Dan Quinn clearly one foot out the door in Seattle and Parsons needs to shut his trap next year until he does something in the playoffs.

To be fair, they sucked in the Lions game too…

[TonyTexas 10,515]

8 hours ago, Disco Strangler said:

Texans with a deep run would be good for Cowboys.  Jones takes this state for granted and puts little effort into winning.  The Cubs of the NFL.  

Since the Texans came into existence 

 

[Underdog 28,690]

5 hours ago, Surly Bevo said:

Gonna be really fucking funny when the Lions make it to the NFC Championship game

Wouldn’t break my heart. 

[Underdog 28,690]

Home Teams 3-1 so far in POs. 

[DigglerontheHoof 21,202]

10 hours ago, Dewey said:

It literally does not matter who the head coach is. This is Jerry's team and his culture. 

This. This. Motherfucking This.  

The rot of failure starts at the top.  And even when he dies, his drooling offspring will continue the culture of losing.  

Jerry can make money falling out of bed.  But he will never, ever win another SB and I doubt any or his offspring do either. 

[hookem48 4,689]

8 hours ago, Texzilla58 said:

For years Dallas QBs could either be Roger/Troy or Danny White. I’d kill for Danny White right now. 3 straight championship games and branded a loser. That sounds great right now.

To each his own, I don't give two shits about what round of the playoffs you lose in. You didn't get it done when it mattered most.  Danny White? That comeback vs Atlanta was great, I got nothing else. 

[Guest]

7 hours ago, TrashMaster G said:

Jerry hasn't received a penny from me in over 25 years. 

I won't buy a Cowboys anything until he's dead.

I went to the first Tech-Baylor game at Jerry World.  Other than that, same here.

Last night during the game, wife is talking to oldest son(30) on the phone, "Your dad doesn't even scare the dogs any more during the Dallas games."  That's right.  I'm just watching the wrecks.  It's a lot more NASCAR for me now.

I don't even hate this team.  I just laugh.

Edited January 15 by slorch

[Guest]

13 minutes ago, DigglerontheHoof said:

This. This. Motherfucking This.  

The rot of failure starts at the top.  And even when he dies, his drooling offspring will continue the culture of losing.  

Jerry can make money falling out of bed.  But he will never, ever win another SB and I doubt any or his offspring do either. 

and this.

The folks saying Jerry dying will fix it, vastly underestimate the kiddos preserving Daddy's legacy.  It won't be the Hunts in Kansas City. It won't be the Rooneys in Pittsburgh.  It will just be more suck, unless... they hire legitimate football people at GM and HC, as opposed to yes men.

[DigglerontheHoof 21,202]

5 minutes ago, slorch said:

I went to the first Tech-Baylor game at Jerry World.  Other than that, same here.

Last night during the game, wife is talking to oldest son(30) on the phone, "Your dad doesn't even scare the dogs any more during the Dallas games."  That's right.  I'm just watching the wrecks.  It's a lot more NASCAR for me now.

I don't even hate this team.  I just laugh.

Yep.  I watch just to see exactly how they're going to choke.  I had a text chain going w/ 3 buds and the only emojis/gifs were laughing.

The group conclusion:

[Fastbreak 3,985]

With a Total QBR of 99.3, Love became the first player to post a 99 QBR in a playoff game since ESPN began the metric in 2006, bettering Josh Allen's 98.8 in a 2021 wild-card game.

Nice…

[Texzilla58 4,738]

To each his own, I don't give two shits about what round of the playoffs you lose in. You didn't get it done when it mattered most.  Danny White? That comeback vs Atlanta was great, I got nothing else. 

I’m not saying I’m a big Danny white fan. And those losses in champ games had much to do with Landry’s failures in the Flex and his reliance on Ernie Stautner on defense. I’m saying it’s a long walk in the desert right now.

The team isn’t getting sold. Under the reality it’s time for Jerry to do what must be done. This team is loaded with talent. And was absolutely destroyed.

Jerry needs to retire and hand the reins to the kids. Charlotte as the team president. Stephen as football operations. Will McClay as GM. Jerry as whatever he does.
And where does it go.

[Nueces River Rat 5,539]

30 minutes ago, slorch said:

and this.

The folks saying Jerry dying will fix it, vastly underestimate the kiddos preserving Daddy's legacy.  It won't be the Hunts in Kansas City. It won't be the Rooneys in Pittsburgh.  It will just be more suck, unless... they hire legitimate football people at GM and HC, as opposed to yes men.

Yep…. More like Adams family.   Not the one with Uncle Fester and Learch.   But the late Bud and now his daughter Amy.  

[Nueces River Rat 5,539]

8 hours ago, TrashMaster G said:

Jerry hasn't received a penny from me in over 25 years. 

I won't buy a Cowboys anything until he's dead.

I really wish what I call the Blue Kool Aid drinkers would understand this.   Sure enough they are complaining and moaning since last night again like they’ve been doing for years now, but will be hitting the discount racks at the local Academy this week for the current year merchandise which Jerry gets a nice chunk of royalties from.  Until he and his successors in waiting  see it on the balance sheet, they ain’t doing anything different.    

[hookem48 4,689]

24 minutes ago, Nueces River Rat said:

I really wish what I call the Blue Kool Aid drinkers would understand this.   Sure enough they are complaining and moaning since last night again like they’ve been doing for years now, but will be hitting the discount racks at the local Academy this week for the current year merchandise which Jerry gets a nice chunk of royalties from.  Until he and his successors in waiting  see it on the balance sheet, they ain’t doing anything different.    

Jerry's 81 years old and he's made $8 billion on his $150 million investment and you're talking tee shirt sales? Jerry would give away a $ billion to win a Super Bowl without Jimmy but he's too football stupid to do it. 

 

 

[Irish Wrist Watch 1,360]

The only reason we won the Division is Philly's collapse. 

[Trey3216 15,346]

10 hours ago, PhillyHorn1 said:

Lol at yall, go Green Bay, or my brother's team 49ers. Fuck Dallas, hate them. Oliers love.

[Horn80 6,124]

54 minutes ago, hookem48 said:

Jerry's 81 years old and he's made $8 billion on his $150 million investment and you're talking tee shirt sales? Jerry would give away a $ billion to win a Super Bowl without Jimmy but he's too football stupid to do it. 

 

 

Technically, he did win SB in 1995 without Jimmy.  

[Nueces River Rat 5,539]

53 minutes ago, hookem48 said:

Jerry's 81 years old and he's made $8 billion on his $150 million investment and you're talking tee shirt sales? Jerry would give away a $ billion to win a Super Bowl without Jimmy but he's too football stupid to do it. 

 

 

Every dollar  feeds the beast if you will.  He's not going to suddenly go broke by any stretch , but numbers sliding south even if they are still in the millions speak to numbers people like the Jones empire.   

[hookem48 4,689]

30 minutes ago, Horn80 said:

Technically, he did win SB in 1995 without Jimmy.  

 Everyone knows Jimmy put that team together, especially Jerry.

[TOR 5,628]

Hope MM is spending the federal holiday cleaning all the menus out of his desk.  

[Tex Long 4,401]

Spent a couple of years living at Grandma's near Dallas. The date was a school holiday in Dallas, celebrating Robert E. Lee's Birthday. 

[Beau Vine 54,246]

 

['stache 21,817]

1 hour ago, hookem48 said:

Jerry's 81 years old and he's made $8 billion on his $150 million investment and you're talking tee shirt sales? Jerry would give away a $ billion to win a Super Bowl without Jimmy but he's too football stupid to do it. 

 

 

Even ticket sales are meaningless in the grand scheme. Ratings are always high because the haters tune in, there’s nothing that can be done to hurt Jerry financially that would make any impact in his decision making. It’s never going to happen. Time to just give up on this franchise. I have.

[Horn80 6,124]

54 minutes ago, hookem48 said:

 Everyone knows Jimmy put that team together, especially Jerry.

Hence, the word “technically”.  Lol

[C-Man 27,230]

11 hours ago, BeardIP said:

It sucks to get embarrassed by a below-average team like the Packers, but all this showed me was the 49er blowout was going to happen again. This team sucked in every big game they played this year except the Lions game, I guess.

Honestly, even though Dak sucked, the defense was horrible. Dan Quinn clearly one foot out the door in Seattle and Parsons needs to shut his trap next year until he does something in the playoffs.

The defense was definitely the worst part but Dak was ALMOST as equally shitty. While he wound up with more than 400 yards passing, he had ZERO in the first quarter and 62 as the Packers built a 27-0 lead. That included one pick-6 and almost another that set up a very short field for the Packers' second TD. Dak was absolute trash but, hey, he got some nice garbage time stats in the second half. He's the poster boy for empty stats.

 

7 hours ago, TonyTexas said:

Since the Texans came into existence 

 

 

2 hours ago, hookem48 said:

Jerry's 81 years old and he's made $8 billion on his $150 million investment and you're talking tee shirt sales? Jerry would give away a $ billion to win a Super Bowl without Jimmy but he's too football stupid to do it. 

 

 

I absolutely believe this.

 

1 hour ago, hookem48 said:

 Everyone knows Jimmy put that team together, especially Jerry.

JJ definitely has a fatal flaw in that he wants to be GM and win the Super Bowl all by "himself." But he did prove his point that any one of 500 coaches could've won a SB with the early 90's Cowboys. Trouble is that Jimmy's fingerprints were all over putting that team together.

[gofuckyourself 8,294]

Is McCarthy back in the barn yet for another year (or two or three) of studying "NFL trends and analytics"?

Edited January 15 by gofuckyourself
And can he take Quinn with him?

[Surly Bevo 24,964]

Just now, gofuckyourself said:

Is McCarthy back in the barn yet for another year (or two or three) of studying "NFL trends and analytics"?

With this cold and McCarthy the pipes at the barn are frozen and the shitter's full.  

[C-Man 27,230]

Bill Barnwell had some interesting stats in his ESPN.com weekend NFL playoff wrapup: https://www.espn.com/nfl/insider/story/_/id/39309176/nfl-wild-card-playoffs-2023-offseason-questions-losing-teams-browns-dolphins-cowboys-rams

Quote

The bigger problems Sunday were on the defensive side of the ball. The Packers averaged 0.39 expected points added per play (EPA/play), which was the sixth-best offensive performance of the season. If we take out the fourth quarter, when they mostly were sitting on the football, they generated 0.57 EPA per play, which was the best single offensive performance by any team all season, topping the Dolphins dropping 70 on the Broncos.

 

Quote

More than anything, the Cowboys looked undisciplined and sloppy. Jones ran through multiple tackles from linebacker Markquese Bell. Cornerback DaRon Bland played off coverage on a third-and-4 that produced a quizzically easy conversion for tight end Luke Musgrave. Corner Stephon Gilmore tried to peek into the backfield in zone coverage and slipped, allowing Doubs to be wide-open for a 46-yard completion on a play where only two receivers went out on routes. Bell and safety Donovan Wilson both chased Love on a boot play, leaving Musgrave open across the field on a classic leak concept for a 38-yard touchdown. With 17.2 yards of separation, Musgrave was more wide open than any other receiver has been on a pass all season, per NFL Next Gen Stats.

 

Edited January 15 by C-Man

[DougO 5,250]

11 hours ago, BeardIP said:

It sucks to get embarrassed by a below-average team like the Packers, but all this showed me was the 49er blowout was going to happen again. This team sucked in every big game they played this year except the Lions game, I guess.

Honestly, even though Dak sucked, the defense was horrible. Dan Quinn clearly one foot out the door in Seattle and Parsons needs to shut his trap next year until he does something in the playoffs.

Yeah, Dak made a couple of brutal throws, but the D was a total dumpsterfire. Quinn comes up with some really cool schemes, but doesn't seem to be able to adjust very well short term or in game. They just flat out sucked ass. That's how shit like the blowouts Dallas suffered, and blowing a 28-3 lead in the Superbowl happens. I sure wish some team were stupid enough to hire him away as a head coach. 

McCarthy is just McCarthy.  Credit to him for getting the offense cranking this year, but his overall leadership and game management is still shittyass shit.

[Irish Wrist Watch 1,360]

1 hour ago, TOR said:

Hope MM is spending the federal holiday cleaning all the menus out of his desk.  

Cowboys locker room: pre-game motivational bulletin board (McCarthy's sloth bled over to his players):

 

Edited January 15 by Irish Wrist Watch

[Surly Bevo 24,964]

8 minutes ago, C-Man said:

Bill Barnell had some interesting stats in his ESPN.com weekend NFL playoff wrapup:

 

 

Open by almost 20 yards. Is that bad?

['stache 21,817]

10 minutes ago, DougO said:

Yeah, Dak made a couple of brutal throws, but the D was a total dumpsterfire. Quinn comes up with some really cool schemes, but doesn't seem to be able to adjust very well short term or in game. They just flat out sucked ass. That's how shit like the blowouts Dallas suffered, and blowing a 28-3 lead in the Superbowl happens. I sure wish some team were stupid enough to hire him away as a head coach. 

McCarthy is just McCarthy.  Credit to him for getting the offense cranking this year, but his overall leadership and game management is still shittyass shit.

Zero adjustments from McCarthy with the play calling when they were clogging the middle and nobody was open. Same as every other blowout loss. Fuck him, Dak is far from perfect, but he and Romo have had everything destroyed by bullshit coaching. The defense lost yesterday, period. The offenses problem was McCarthy. I’m done with all of it.

Edited January 15 by 'stache

[babysdaddy 2,725]

I hate that I love the Cowboys.  It's an abusive relationship that I'm stuck in forever.  

[Guest]

"Seize everything" is a really weird motto right?

It makes me think of an FBI raid or a communist takeover involving the "means of production." Very weird to have that as a motto.

[Horn80 6,124]

Good luck to any team that hires Dan Quinn.  He blew a huge lead in SB and completely shit the bed yesterday along with McCarthy who I never thought was any good without Rodgers to cover up for him.

[DanTheHorn 4,925]

3 hours ago, hookem48 said:

Jerry's 81 years old and he's made $8 billion on his $150 million investment and you're talking tee shirt sales? Jerry would give away a $ billion to win a Super Bowl without Jimmy but he's too football stupid to do it. 

 

 

This is what warms my heart because when he hired Barry Switzer as a fuck you to all the Cowboy fans that were Texas fans he lost me and I loved my Cowboys. Now he is feeling what we use to feel before becoming completely apathetic. Fuck you Jerrah and thanks for the interview after the game it was the ultimate schadenfreude.

Edited January 15 by DanTheHorn

[Pato del Muerto 52,507]

I was looking through gifs of the letterkenny coach to post here or the game thread, but each one of them contains way more emotion than I’ve had for this franchise for 15 years at least. So I abandoned the idea. 

[Texzilla58 4,738]

Every dollar  feeds the beast if you will.  He's not going to suddenly go broke by any stretch , but numbers sliding south even if they are still in the millions speak to numbers people like the Jones empire.   

The tickets get sold. The real estate continues to appreciate. The TV money comes rolling in. Jerry rescued this franchise from the gotterdamerung it was headed to with latter Murchison and Bum Bright.

He is not the only the field shitting, Dak was. He wasn’t fucking up, parsons was. He doesn’t call plays.

He has a personnel staff with his son and will McCain with 9 fucking pro bowlers, a top qb, a top WR, talented o linemen, which performed in season. Got a 2 seed. Shit the bed again. Jerry had nothing to do with that. That’s on Mike, Quinn, the position coaches, and the team leaders. It’s not working. Jerry needs to realize it’s endemic in the culture going back to Wade. And he’s an enabler of it. His attitude, his lack of accountability for players, the poshness of the Star. Softness.

Id like to see a driver like vrabel and a new qb, a top Qb coach, a dc focused on the modern game.

[Irish Wrist Watch 1,360]

So I guess McCarthy will retire to his barn and begin marathon study of NFL trends. For some reason this pic from the movie Se7en comes to mind.

 

[DougO 5,250]

4 hours ago, hookem48 said:

Jerry's 81 years old and he's made $8 billion on his $150 million investment and you're talking tee shirt sales? Jerry would give away a $ billion to win a Super Bowl without Jimmy but he's too football stupid to do it. 

 

 

This is fact. The myth that Jerry is only interested in making money is false. He wants to win more than anyone, for his own ego. He just doesn't have a clue how to get it done. So at least he's got his money.

[Irish Wrist Watch 1,360]

1 hour ago, 'stache said:

Zero adjustments from McCarthy with the play calling when they were clogging the middle and nobody was open. Same as every other blowout loss. Fuck him, Dak is far from perfect, but he and Romo have had everything destroyed by bullshit coaching. The defense lost yesterday, period. The offenses problem was McCarthy. I’m done with all of it.

You'd think that shithead McCarthy and shithead Quinn don't talk to each other during the game. It's as if a Defensive Coordinator doesn't see what an opposing offense is doing when his D is getting smeared, and he's incapable of relaying a suggestion or two to the OC, in this case McCarthy when he can't get on track. Works both ways.

And FWIW, Bayless, whom y'all despise, repeated a couple of quotes from Trey Lance's past coaches that make him sound like the second coming of Christ. What did Fat Mike do to develop him - to put pressure on Prescott to up his game? I know nothing about him except that I heard one pundit say he was the only highlight in one of our pre-season games this year.

Sorry, but fuck Cooper Rush. Rush him the fuck outta town.

Edited January 15 by Irish Wrist Watch

['stache 21,817]

6 minutes ago, Irish Wrist Watch said:

You'd think that shithead McCarthy and shithead Quinn don't talk to each other during the game. It's as if a Defensive Coordinator doesn't see what an opposing offense is doing when his D is getting smeared, and he's incapable of relaying a suggestion or two to the OC, in this case McCarthy when he can't get on track. Works both ways.

And FWIW, Bayless, whom y'all despise, repeated a couple of quotes from Trey Lance's past coaches that make him sound like the second coming of Christ. What did Fat Mike do to develop him - to put pressure on Prescott to up his game? I know nothing about him except that I heard one pundit say he was the only highlight in one of our pre-season games this year.

Sorry, but fuck Cooper Rush. Rush him the fuck outta town.

Fucking Greg Olson was telestrating how their defense was different than normal with the two high safeties clogging the middle. So to get Lamb going, he calls a fucking slant right into traffic, pick 6. Dak should have held on to that ball, but at some point, when everyone is covered every play, you have to make a throw. If he takes a sack or throws it away, fans yell that he sucks for not throwing it, without considering that nobody is fucking open because McCarthy got owned and can’t adjust. If I were Dak, I’d beg for a trade.

Edited January 15 by 'stache

[Beau Vine 54,246]

1 hour ago, Pato del Muerto said:

I was looking through gifs of the letterkenny coach to post here or the game thread, but each one of them contains way more emotion than I’ve had for this franchise for 15 years at least. So I abandoned the idea. 

Let's just stick with this:

 

[Irish Wrist Watch 1,360]

What I remember most about McCarthy's hire, was that FJJ didn't interview anybody else (or maybe one or so). In an industry/sport filled with up'n'comers, filled with innovative minds and future hall of fame coaches, that stupid fucking hillbilly hired a coach nobody else wanted without talking to any other candidates. How many fucking years of grief with this fuck who was goddamn out of fucking work - and wasn't going anywhere.

I think the hire came down to the fact that McCarthy came cheap. Seems to me that many years ago I heard an interview with Pete Carroll who interviewed with Jones, maybe when he was leaving UCLA, or thinking about it, but he said that he and Jerry had agreed to everything - set to go, but then the Cowboys came thru with an offer - an offer which Carroll said would have made him the lowest paid coach in the league. He knew right then it was time to cut bait. Jones of course ends up hiring one of those transition groups, maybe Chan Gailey or Dave Campo - complete duds.

Now everyone is talking about Bellichick, a coach who has a major losing record in the NFL in all games without Tom Brady. A coach who couldn't innovate any kind of return for New England post Brady. A coach who told his owner that Brady should be traded, that he was done. (After which, Brady goes down to Tampa and wins another Super Bowl.) I hope FJJ doesn't make the same fucking mistake he made when he hired Fat Fuck.

[tx 3 putt 76,980]