Dallas Cowboys Metathread - Oh No We Suck Again!

[Sgt Hulk 13716]

Jfc lol

[kevwun 15783]

1 minute ago, 'stache said:

Nice, GTFO asshole. Although, he'll probably dominate Fat Mike as long as he's there, since he knows his tendency to do the same shit over and over even if it doesn't work.

That will be countered by his tendency to allow receivers to run wide open all over the field.

[Texzilla58 4735]

So it appears he’s like the 7th choice. I wonder if he got more money than Fat Mike’s meager $4 mil a year.

How do you sell that hire as the new owner with the hotshot basketball dude? Out of everyone out there, we’re hiring Mr 28-3. The dude that collapsed against a really young packers team.

He might take Joe Whitt as his DC.

['stache 21813]

What's going to be telling is the DC hire. Will it be a young innovative guy who can adjust to modern offenses? Of course not, that type of coach won't be one of Jerry's perferred yes men. It'll be some old ass boring retread who sucks shit, guaranteed. Is Rod Marinelli still alive? Jerry would probably be happy to Weekend and Bernies him to ensure only Jerry ever gets credit for anything.

[Sgt Hulk 13716]

Yeah we are def gonna hire some washed up shit show no doubt 

[Radical Larry 28589]

Go get Vrabel? 

It’s going to be Ron Rivera.

[Trey3216 15346]

Mike Zimmer.....c'mon down!!!  lol

[Vic Mackey 47029]

It’s going to be Ron Rivera.

Awesome. Another retread loser to pair with Fat Mike.

[mdmost 43001]

13 minutes ago, Radical Larry said:

It’s going to be Ron Rivera.

Sigh...I know. 

[speed817 19268]

32 minutes ago, Vic Mackey said:

Dan Quinn the new head coach of Washington

[VirginiaLonghorn 4771]

27 minutes ago, mdmost said:

Go get Vrabel? 

 

17 minutes ago, Radical Larry said:

It’s going to be Ron Rivera.

Thanks for the laugh …

[Gene Parmesan 4006]

33 minutes ago, 'stache said:

Nice, GTFO asshole. Although, he'll probably dominate Fat Mike as long as he's there, since he knows his tendency to do the same shit over and over even if it doesn't work.

So two games?

[Irish Wrist Watch 1359]

It occurs to me that Jerry's plan is to hire an OC - and now a DC. His tight ass can squeeze out enough money for that level, but to get the very best, he's gonna have to promise one that if your Offense (or Defense) shines, you will be the head coach when FatLazy's contract runs out. He'll throw in that "you have to continue to exhibit the leadership of an HC, but we already know you got that." Now with two Coordinator slots open, he can play one against the other for that HC position. Make the same promise to both.

Also, he can tell each coordinator candidate "Look, you can just ignore anything the Fat Fuck tells you. Do your job and make your Offense (Defense) shine, and you'll be a shoe-in come next season."

The plan could work. If you're a cheapskate, how else you gonna get a young, innovative HC ala Shanahan?

[DougO 5245]

15 hours ago, TornACL said:

If you really want a shock, start that Cowboys Vikings video at 1:15:00 and watch for a couple of minutes.

I watched all these old playoff games during COVID while working from home and I thought I was hallucinating when I saw this.

And back to the game. Nothing much to see there...

[Vic Mackey 47029]

Promote Al Harris to DC.

[tx 3 putt 76933]

Not sure why’d you hire quinn over vrabel 

[Pam Cummings 9641]

Vrabel likely wants more power, Washington seems all-in on having a GM being the coach's boss type of power structure.

Edited February 1 by Pam Cummings

[LTtxfan 49184]

9 hours ago, Vic Mackey said:

Promote Al Harris to DC.

Is Zimmer in consideration ??

 

Also...

 

Edited February 2 by LTtxfan

[markstanco 12576]

I find it odd that some of yall are buying into the recency bias with Dan Quinn. He was a great DC, to the point where he is now a HC.

We are aggy.

[tokamak 6427]

43 minutes ago, markstanco said:

I find it odd that some of yall are buying into the recency bias with Dan Quinn. He was a great DC, to the point where he is now a HC.

We are aggy.

Man, it don't make a shit either way. This organization has way, way deeper problems than the name of the defensive coordinator.

Worrying about losing DQ is like saying my haircut is gonna cost me a chance to fuck Ana de Armas. Technically, sure, she's not fucking any dudes with bad haircuts. But the truth is, I'm never going to even get within 500 yards of Ana de Armas in the first place. Per the judge's order.

[ConferenceRoom 6141]

Same. 

['stache 21813]

10 hours ago, markstanco said:

I find it odd that some of yall are buying into the recency bias with Dan Quinn. He was a great DC, to the point where he is now a HC.

We are aggy.

Well the most recent game was as pathetic a defensive performance as I’ve ever seen, and I’ve been an OSU fan since the late 90s. Let a no name qb carve him up nonstop for an entire game in the first round of the playoffs is not offset by some decent regular season performances. Fuck him, he deserves Washington and vice versa, hope the stadium crumbles in him and their jackass new owner.

Edited February 2 by 'stache

[Texzilla58 4735]

Awesome. Another retread loser to pair with Fat Mike.

Ernie Stauntner is hanging around

[Paper_jam 831]

Maybe we could get Wade Phillips back, this time as DC!

 

 

[TankedBevo 2482]

Lovie Smith come on doooooowwnn!!!

[Zeus 6022]

Dan Quinn going to have the redskins in the NFC championship game before the cowboys. 

[SurlyBDR 22783]

[Chooky 13307]

On 2/1/2024 at 10:25 AM, Radical Larry said:

It’s going to be Ron Rivera.

The convenient thing about hiring Rivera is that it buys you at least 3 years before you have to fire him. He's gas station food -- filled a void but nothing exciting. 

[futureman 22457]

49 minutes ago, Chooky said:

He's gas station food -- filled a void but nothing exciting. 

you’re eating at the wrong gas stations. 

[EvilCaseMcCoy 691]

30 minutes ago, futureman said:

you’re eating at the wrong gas stations. 

Yeah, ever been to a 7 eleven in Japan? 

[LTtxfan 49184]

Cowboys Legends...

 

[Gucci_Suit 2644]

18 hours ago, EvilCaseMcCoy said:

Yeah, ever been to a 7 eleven in Japan? 

Or an Allsups in Clovis?

[DougO 5245]

"Zimmer spent the 2023 campaign away from the game but studying current trends as part of an effort to return to the sidelines."

 

So there... it will all be just fine.

 

[Surly Bevo 24908]

5 minutes ago, DougO said:

"Zimmer spent the 2023 campaign away from the game but studying current trends as part of an effort to return to the sidelines."

 

So there... it will all be just fine.

 

Was he in a barn?  It only works if he was studying in a barn.

Edited February 5 by Surly Bevo

[DougO 5245]

On 2/1/2024 at 10:11 AM, Vic Mackey said:

Dan Quinn the new head coach of Washington

If they ever get a lead over anybody, it will never be safe.

[Texzilla58 4735]

Yeah, ever been to a 7 eleven in Japan? 

I have. They are even better than Wawa. They are amazing.

['stache 21813]

So Zimmer it is, consistent with all of Jerry's hires, it has to be people with no other options, because nobody worth a shit wants to work for that idiot egomaniac. 

Edited February 5 by 'stache

[markstanco 12576]

14 hours ago, DougO said:

"Zimmer spent the 2023 campaign away from the game but studying current trends as part of an effort to return to the sidelines."

 

So there... it will all be just fine.

 

Oh goodie, at least he is well rested.  67 year old DC trying to adapt to hybrid college/nfl offenses. 

[Vic Mackey 47029]

At this point, just go hire Dave Campo while we are looking at re-tread losers.

[Braff Zacklin 13562]

7 minutes ago, Vic Mackey said:

At this point, just go hire Dave Campo while we are looking at re-tread losers.

Do you even Butch Davis, bruh?

[Pam Cummings 9641]

Just look at a list of head coaches that got fired between the years of 1999-2005, one of those names should do

[Texzilla58 4735]

I’m thinking Dana X Bible might be ready for another go

[gofuckyourself 8227]

18 hours ago, DougO said:

"Zimmer spent the 2023 campaign away from the game but studying current trends as part of an effort to return to the sidelines."

 

So there... it will all be just fine.

 

Or 4 years ago.

[lilMAC25 3794]

Zimmer as a DC has had a better career than Quinn. I think he’d be a great hire, but then again, since I think so, you all should bet heavily against it working out.

[Dewey 3286]

Jerry and his comfort hires. First he recycled through Jimmy's staff, then he kept the wrong Parcels disciple and now he requires a guy to have 30 years in the league with moderate success. Bienemy has some years to go before Jerry gives him a look. Still too young, but his resume is lining up for Jerry's liking.  

He is so stubborn and has only an inkling of what to do with roster and staff. 

We all know how the Zimmerman hire will go, good regular season, shitty postseason, ends up the head coach when fat boy is canned. 

[General Colt 121]

3 hours ago, Dewey said:

Jerry and his comfort hires. First he recycled through Jimmy's staff, then he kept the wrong Parcels disciple and now he requires a guy to have 30 years in the league with moderate success. Bienemy has some years to go before Jerry gives him a look. Still too young, but his resume is lining up for Jerry's liking.  

He is so stubborn and has only an inkling of what to do with roster and staff. 

We all know how the Zimmerman hire will go, good regular season, shitty postseason, ends up the head coach when fat boy is canned. 

Meanwhile, after that shit show playoff loss, Jerruh extended this guy's contract:

We're George.

[Braff Zacklin 13562]

Dave Wannstedt is still heavily pockmarked and rested ...

[markstanco 12576]

100% Parsons is gone

[Vic Mackey 47029]

100% Parsons is gone

You'll only notice him missing in the first part of the season

['stache 21813]

15 hours ago, Dewey said:

Jerry and his comfort hires. First he recycled through Jimmy's staff, then he kept the wrong Parcels disciple and now he requires a guy to have 30 years in the league with moderate success. Bienemy has some years to go before Jerry gives him a look. Still too young, but his resume is lining up for Jerry's liking.  

He is so stubborn and has only an inkling of what to do with roster and staff. 

We all know how the Zimmerman hire will go, good regular season, shitty postseason, ends up the head coach when fat boy is canned. 

Yup, you know this is what will happen. Nobody young and innovative wants to work for Jerry, and Jerry doesn’t want a young guy getting any credit. So it’ll be Zimmer who will be HC at 70. Fuck Jerry.

Edited February 6 by 'stache