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Dallas Cowboys Metathread - Oh No We Suck Again!


Hermanator

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1 minute ago, futureman said:

no team is "just as dysfunctional."  the cowboys are the most dysfunctional.  they are an extravagant traveling circus that has accomplished nothing in almost a third of a century.  were you born yesterday?

Someone's not familiar with Houston Texans ownership. McNair's are just as bad if not worse than Jerry. 

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It's a weird sport. Cowboys look dead in the water against the niners then 7 days later Purdy shows he's not very good if he doesn't have top of the league weapons in McCaffrey and Deebo, and Hurts looks like shit again throwing a Romo/Dak like interception to lose to a Jets team the Cowboys just blasted out of the water a couple weeks ago. Both niners and eagles lose to teams with no QBs. 

 

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Someone's not familiar with Houston Texans ownership. McNair's are just as bad if not worse than Jerry. 

Yeah, but the owner at least let’s the football people do their job. They’ve got the coach, staff, and QB right for now. It remains to be seen in the GM, but at least they will make a change if he screws things up. The Cowboys have had a shitty GM for 35 years now.
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On 10/11/2023 at 3:45 PM, Pam Cummings said:

Jerry loves Dak because he wants a "face of the franchise" to sell merch. Thats all it is. He doesnt care about winning. He cares about winning just enough to keep people interested. Every action he takes is evidence.

jerry should sign messi to kick field goals.

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The football gods are mad because I went to a pool party downtown with friends instead of watching the game with family. I broke the tradition. Was say you Surly, how do I make the football gods happy? I started drinking at 8am for my sins. Drinking early always leads to great football days. 

Hookem

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3 hours ago, Mo Horn said:

Was curious so looked at our stats this year. Our 1st round pick has played in only 2 of the 5 games and has a whopping 2 tackles and 2 assists. Nice job Jerrah

1 tech DT's often take a year or two, but yea, early returns suck.  His get off is so fucking slow, he can't get in the proper tech to use his considerable strength.  Now do our 2nd round draft pick?  4th rounder?  Any rounder?  Best new guys on the team are UDFA's.  Sorry, you don't get a ton of credit for those.  For a team supposedly a piece or two away, this front office gets an D for its offseason.  Finally got Cooks to help out, but we can't block long enough to use his speed.

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There's no bigger indication that Pollard has lost a step after the injury than that 60 yd catch and run. No way Samuel runs him down from behind this time last year. He doesn't have that burst of speed he used to have and it was what made him worth having around. 

Also the Cowboys draft last year was abysmal. Can't think of one guy who is doing anything of note

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12 hours ago, Mo Horn said:

Was curious so looked at our stats this year. Our 1st round pick has played in only 2 of the 5 games and has a whopping 2 tackles and 2 assists. Nice job Jerrah

2nd round TE is a JAG, too. They panicked after the TEs they really wanted were already gone.

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There's no bigger indication that Pollard has lost a step after the injury than that 60 yd catch and run. No way Samuel runs him down from behind this time last year. He doesn't have that burst of speed he used to have and it was what made him worth having around. 
Also the Cowboys draft last year was abysmal. Can't think of one guy who is doing anything of note
The whole off season was bad. Franchising Pollard and giving him that salary after that injury was dumb. It offset washing our hands from Zeke.

Draft was bad. Not even hindsight. Those picks fucking sucked on draft night. More Michigan dorks who are soft and make no difference. It's Taco all over again. Even the huge Cowboys homers online weren't even trying to spin our picks.

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On 10/15/2023 at 6:46 PM, Hermanator said:

It's a weird sport. Cowboys look dead in the water against the niners then 7 days later Purdy shows he's not very good if he doesn't have top of the league weapons in McCaffrey and Deebo, and Hurts looks like shit again throwing a Romo/Dak like interception to lose to a Jets team the Cowboys just blasted out of the water a couple weeks ago. Both niners and eagles lose to teams with no QBs. 

 

That's the way NFL go.

 

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13 hours ago, tokamak said:

2nd round TE is a JAG, too. They panicked after the TEs they really wanted were already gone.

If they had picked Sam LaPorta in the first round, 8 picks sooner than he went to the Lions, they would have looked like geniuses. 

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The whole off season was bad. Franchising Pollard and giving him that salary after that injury was dumb. It offset washing our hands from Zeke.

Draft was bad. Not even hindsight. Those picks fucking sucked on draft night. More Michigan dorks who are soft and make no difference. It's Taco all over again. Even the huge Cowboys homers online weren't even trying to spin our picks.


You forgot drafting a jockey sized RB. Surprised they didn’t draft a windy day kickoff ball holder or a drop kick specialist.
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I love when they slip on the wet floor of beer piss and sweat while trying to swing at someone. I think they were in a fight over those pink flags.

They’re all in their cars sopping wet, half drunk, some blood, and going “goddam I got a good one in on that Cowboy motherfucker!” Forgetting the dudes wife poked him with a flagstick.

Does sofi have 30k cheap sro tix for these games like att?

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On 10/18/2023 at 2:10 PM, BeardIP said:

If you ever wanted to fully grasp the absurdity of the NFL, join a season long "Pick 'em".

The illogical upsets that will happen some weeks boggles the mind. BOGGLES THE MIND.

NFL Knockout is a great game to play if you have a ton of people participating. It's so much harder than it seems, especially if the rules state you can't pick the same team twice. 

Just realized I hadn't opened this thread since Oct 17. 10 full days and haven't thought about the Cowboys a single time. Jerry has finally killed the fan inside of me. 

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NFL Knockout is a great game to play if you have a ton of people participating. It's so much harder than it seems, especially if the rules state you can't pick the same team twice. 
Just realized I hadn't opened this thread since Oct 17. 10 full days and haven't thought about the Cowboys a single time. Jerry has finally killed the fan inside of me. 
Furthest I've made it was the week before the last week of the season. I was on a roll that year. Another year made it 3 weeks before the end of season. Never actually completed one. There's been years I've lost in the very 1st week. My go to strategy is follow a shit ass team and keep picking the teams to beat them.
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2 hours ago, Vic Mackey said:

Gotta love it!ae3412bbda4d5a191bf01d3ca81859f5.jpgcf2ae7ad9e4257f5a2cb20459ddb9ee6.jpg

Pathetic..... And Jerrah will bitch when we lose in the 2nd round of the playoffs.  No will to make moves to get over the hump.

I don't care about getting Derrick Henry (should have drafted him back in the day), but how about going and getting another LB?  A corner?  Maybe another DT?

Silliness.

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So which of these trades would you have traded draft capital for (assuming no nfc east team would trade with Dallas)?

A 3 for 28yr old Rasul Douglas? Not me.
A 3 for Chase Young? Not a bad price but Skins aren’t trading him to us. And that’s going to be a pricey group soon.
Ezra Cleveland G to jags for a 6. Would have really looked at that one.
Montez Sweat to bears for a 2. Again Skins wouldnt trade him to us. Wash is cleaning house for picks to go get a QB.
Kentavius Street. Eagles aren’t trading to us.
Leonard Williams. Giants ain’t talking to us.
Hard man to Chiefs. Cost them the bronco game with extreme stupidity.

None of the rest. Randy Gregory? Ha!

This team needs O line help and there wasn’t shit.

It takes two to trade.

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2 hours ago, TXLNGHRN10 said:

I'm heading up to Dallas next week for the Giants game. Looking for parking advice, tips etc.. thinking about maybe even tailgating a little bit.
Any advice would be apprecitated

Tip 1) however much money you think you'll need for everything... Quadruple it. 

Tip 2) very short notice as you only have a week but find the nearest MMA gym and cram in as many training sessions as you can in 1 week. Tell them you'll need to be able to fight multiple out of shape drunk idiots on polished slick concrete. 

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1 minute ago, BeardIP said:

Watching this Rangers parade on TV it dawned on me that Jerry Jones, while publicly happy and celebratory as he should be with this sports brother here in town, has to also be wrestling with some jealousy and despair. I don't think he's going to be someone you want to be around the next day or so, especially if we lose to the Eagles.

All the other franchises have won a title since 1995. The Rangers also turned it around with a badass GM Chris Young. It has to be driving him crazy that DFW is talking about him since he has to know that the fans are clamoring for him to hire a GM.

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31 minutes ago, BeardIP said:

Watching this Rangers parade on TV it dawned on me that Jerry Jones, while publicly happy and celebratory as he should be with this sports brother here in town, has to also be wrestling with some jealousy and despair. I don't think he's going to be someone you want to be around the next day or so, especially if we lose to the Eagles.

Jerry doesn't give a shit about winning. He pretends to. If he really cared, he'd hire a GM and step out the way. Jerry only cares about his brand and his billions. He knows his team is one of the most popular franchises in the world of any sport. All his games get high ratings. While the other teams are winning since him, he can say he has as many in 4 years in the 90s and the other 3 have combined in the nearly 30 years since is. Jerry only wants to win one way and that's him being the GM with his hillbilly son. Otherwise, he wouldn't get the credit.

Nothing is ever going to change with his approach or mindset. "We love our players" is our motto. This 2023 draft is looking as bad as that special teams draft awhile back.

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All the other franchises have won a title since 1995. The Rangers also turned it around with a badass GM Chris Young. It has to be driving him crazy that DFW is talking about him since he has to know that the fans are clamoring for him to hire a GM.

Jerry is telling himself we won 5 since they came about in 61. 3 on my watch. Glad they finally did something.

If Jerry steps aside the GM will be Stephen. He’s got the most valuable franchise on earth. Draws more eyeballs on TV than an other team. He’s planning on a ring. He’s got the greatest qb he ever saw right now.

I don’t get the call for a GM. Most teams have shitty football GMs. I’d put Will McClay against anyone and he’s running personnel and scouting. Stephen grew up in the business and knows it; you might not like some of his decisions but they don’t come from a lack of experience.
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3 hours ago, Vic Mackey said:

Jerry doesn't give a shit about winning. He pretends to. If he really cared, he'd hire a GM and step out the way. Jerry only cares about his brand and his billions. He knows his team is one of the most popular franchises in the world of any sport. All his games get high ratings. While the other teams are winning since him, he can say he has as many in 4 years in the 90s and the other 3 have combined in the nearly 30 years since is. Jerry only wants to win one way and that's him being the GM with his hillbilly son. Otherwise, he wouldn't get the credit.

Nothing is ever going to change with his approach or mindset. "We love our players" is our motto. This 2023 draft is looking as bad as that special teams draft awhile back.

Nothing would make Jerry more money faster than winning a Super Bowl.

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