Brent Venables sits in the right lane at red lights when he's going straight

[Boss Hogg 808]

Brett Venables is a HEAVY CR poster. 

[Boss Hogg 808]

Brent Venables fucking loves Bro Country

[orangeut 212]

Bent Venalbles takes his wife to the romantic city of Cleveland    What a dumbass

Edited October 3, 2023 by orangeut

[Texasborn91 935]

Brent Venables thinks missionary is risky. 

[Dnaguy 11,964]

BV tries to use Mastercard, then cash, and finally writes a personal check at Costco.... on Sunday.

[ajax 2,617]

Brent Venables thinks NFL broadcasts should be giving Taylor Swift more of the spotlight.

Edit - shit, I'm late. @hookem17 already said the same thing

Edited October 3, 2023 by ajax

[ajax 2,617]

Brint Venereal thinks Ticketmaster should charge more in fees.

[ousux 5,597]

Brent Venables is convinced Barbie will sweep all the Academy awards.

[Eskimohorn 5,635]

When BV and his wife fly into Austin every year for SXSW, they spend most of their time in Waco to enjoy the Magnolia store and restaurant.

[Boss Hogg 808]

Brent Venables fucked Fitlump

[YGIFS 19,450]

Brent Venables starts every conversation with, "Since I'm a student of the Constitution, let me tell you something..."  

[Dnaguy 11,964]

BV carries a pocket constitution.

[Eskimohorn 5,635]

BV uses the constitution as toilet paper.

[MrBig 5,398]

BV wishes he could’ve run down the Clemson hill instead of Dabo

[PvilleStang 2,907]

BV introduced Taylor Swift to Kelce.  

BV's role models off the field are Joe Paterno and Jerry Sandusky.

BV didn't see anything wrong with what Baylor did.

[HornOnTheBayou 8,922]

BV thinks this summer hasn't been so bad. 

[PanchoChancho 19]

BV has flashbacks to Vietnam

[YGIFS 19,450]

Brent Venables told his black defensive players to shut up and tackle.  

Brent Venables eats his peas one at a time.

Brent Venables went into coaching because he was too stupid to be an airline pilot.  But to this day, he still opens his garage door, starts his car, and just sits in idle for 35 minutes before backing out for no reason.  

[Bevo&Pevo 5,146]

BV proudly claims he invented the slogan:  You can't spell COCKSUCKER without ou.

BV still uses floaties in the pool.

BV and his wife share the same underwear.

BV sings Sweet Caroline during the church hymnal.

BV pours the milk in the bowl, then adds the cereal.

to be continued......

[lemonandaturd 4,285]

Brent Venables is scared shitless of Steve Sarkisian.

[PvilleStang 2,907]

BV orders his steak well done, and uses A1.

[YGIFS 19,450]

Brent Venables wakes up early to write his own name on his kids' student government ballots to secretly place them in their backpacks.  

[Wishbone 4,760]

Brent Venables Scotchguard’s the inside of his pants.

[YGIFS 19,450]

Brent Venables served me chili once.  In four quadrants.  One was the meat.  One was the sauce.  One was the spices.  One was the cheese.  All of them had beans.

[coachherman'sgrill 2,105]

Bert Vaginal waters his lawn err'day

[Stunns38 3,460]

Brent Venables sits when he pees

Brent Venables shits standing up

[YGIFS 19,450]

Brett Venables purposely lies and says  “no, first time here” when asked by a waiter who inquires “have you dined with us before?  If not, let me tell you how we do things here…”

[Boss Hogg 808]

Brent Venables put mayonnaise on his Whataburger instead of mustard. 

[Boss Hogg 808]

Brent Venables celebrates Ian Boyd’s entire catalog. 

[Eskimohorn 5,635]

Brent Venables doesn’t just protest homosexuality at funerals of strangers (like soldiers), he shows this conviction at relatives and friends funerals.

[Digdogger 1,344]

Brent Venables think Mary Kate is the most talented Olsen

[Digdogger 1,344]

Brent Venables’ favorite president is Millard Fillmore

[Digdogger 1,344]

Brent Venables vacations only at all inclusive resorts 

[Digdogger 1,344]

Brent Venables wears sansabelts with a belt

[Digdogger 1,344]

Brent Venables will always remember the Alamo.  And by that I mean the time he argued for 2 1/2 hours at St Louis Lambert to get upgraded from his Chevy Malibu to a PT Cruiser with Alamo Rental, only to learn his reservation was with Hertz.

[Digdogger 1,344]

Brent Venables thinks @South Austin’s mom is a lovely lady

[Digdogger 1,344]

Brent Venables thinks Matt LeBlanc was the best Top Gear host

[JesusSweatDuck 17,781]

Burnt Vegetables hands out bibles on campus

[JesusSweatDuck 17,781]

Blistered Vagina doesn't use headphones for conference calls in an open office 

[Magabro 171]

Brent Venables takes marriage counseling from Joe Mixon

[Waterface 129]

Brent Venables is the kind of guy who struggles with his consience before finally deciding to go to a gloryhole with the intention of sucking anonymous cock, only to proceed to stare at the wall while multiple cocks impatiently cycle out of the gloryhole for over an hour while he gently rubs his balls over his jeans and and silently cries

[South Austin 52,507]

Brent Venables wrote Digdogger off for dead.

[Huckleberry 32,861]

Brent Venables schedules work meetings from 11:30-1 and doesn't provide food. 

[JesusSweatDuck 17,781]

1 hour ago, Waterface said:

Brent Venables is the kind of guy who struggles with his consience before finally deciding to go to a gloryhole with the intention of sucking anonymous cock, only to proceed to stare at the wall while multiple cocks impatiently cycle out of the gloryhole for over an hour while he gently rubs his balls over his jeans and and silently cries

Strangely specific 

[SilasCoade 2,622]

16 hours ago, Bevo&Pevo said:

BV pours the milk in the bowl, then adds the cereal.

wtf, is this a thing?

[PvilleStang 2,907]

BV throws his six pack holders away without cutting them up to save the turtles.

[BrazilHorn 6,607]

Brett Venables hired Jeff Lebby. 

[Bevo&Pevo 5,146]

2 hours ago, SilasCoade said:

wtf, is this a thing?

Not at my haus.

[PvilleStang 2,907]

BV... eh, this thread needs a photoshop.

 

[Pimphand 5,751]

When Sen Dog wrote this outro he was talking to Venables....
 

 

Edited October 4, 2023 by Pimphand