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Seven Win Steve Rides Again!


closetojumping

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1 hour ago, closetojumping said:

I stayed away this weekend, assuming the board would be loaded with doom and gloom and then a bunch of rationalization. After clicking around, it looks like things held together here somewhat nicely. 

That considered, now I'm worried about things here in the opposite direction. The general optimism towards the rest of the season across numerous threads creates the impression that a whole herd of you guys aren't prepared for what's actually going to unfold. That could lead to utter catastrophe when the inevitable happens, leading to numerous psychotic breaks for stunned denizens of this board and I'd hate to see it/hear about it.

The reality is, Steve Sarklostagain still hasn't done a fucking thing in his career to merit receiving the benefit of the doubt from the fanbase and posters on this board. He's never won more than 9 games, he's been outcoached on numerous occasions, and he's a born loser at heart, reflected repeatedly in a career of inexplicable losses. 

Seven Loss Steve's entire head coaching history reflects a penchant for winning games that surprise people and then following that soon enough with an inexplicable loss or seven. 

2009 - UW plays LSU close to open the season, then pulls a wild upset of USC in week 3 before going 5-7 with headscratching losses to a failing Weis-led ND program that went 6-6 and ended up firing their fat idiot head coach to end the year and then a loss to an eventual 4-8 ASU team that lost all 5 games they played after beating UW.

"but closetojumping, UW was 0-11 in 2008! he can't be dinged for the turnaround in that season!" - wait, there's more.

2010 - After upsetting 18th ranked USC on the road in the Colesseum, Seven Win turns around the next week at home and shits the bed against an ASU that had lost 3 straight and went 6-6.

2011 - No real surprising wins this season, but ol'Seven Loss did find a way to climb into the dumpster and light his team on fire by losing to an Oregon State that was 2-8 at the time and finished 3-9.

2012 - a 3rd straight 7 win season. Steve Sarkloseian took some early losses against good teams and brought his team roaring back to a 7-4 record and 4 game winning streak before bending his Washington team over and letting a 3-9 Washington State team just buttfuck it into oblivion in the annual rivalry game. He had some big time "we're back!" wins this season, beating #7 Stanford and #Oregon State.

2013 - Finally, a retooled roster with all of Seven Loss' own players! UW marches out to a 4-0 record before getting buzzsawed by the #5 and then #2 teams in the country, the latter in blowout fashion. Not the end of the world. Then, they headed to Tempe, still ranked, and were beaten by 4 touchdowns via a Todd Graham-led ASU team on no one's radar. At 8-4, and showing an obvious trajectory towards titles, USC calls Seven Win Steve home!

2014 - Seven Win's best year to date, he takes a USC team, ranked 15th to open the year, and they finish ranked #20 with underdog wins against two ranked opponents while also inexplicably losing a slap fight to a Boston College team that would finish 7-6.

2015 - Uneven Steven had USC open at #8 and then plummet out of the top 25 at 3-2 when he was seen visibly drunk on the sidelines during a loss to an unranked UW team and eventually fired for repeating the behavior the following week at practices.

2021 - No valued win in this 5-7 season of rebuilding! a 7-3 roster, but Texas did have standout losses to eventual 7-6 Iowa State, 2-10 Kansas, and 6-7 West Virginia.

2022 - We can argue about Texas Tech but Texas should have won that fucking game. Seven Win Steve freezing up with his playcalling against Tech, TCU, and Okie State played critical roles in the eventual 8-5 season.

2023 - If you can't find the next headscratching loss, you're not alone. No one else seems to be able to on this board either. I'll help you out though.

It is likely going to be among one of these opponents, and will likely be at least two of them, given history:

@UH

BYU

KSU

@TCU

@ISU

Tech

I've bolded my best bets, but it could happen with any of them.

Stop talking about the playoffs or rematching against OU. Texas doesn't have the coach for that. We're staring down the barrel of a 9-3 regular season. Sarkisian has said privately that he views bowl games as prep for the next season and the outcome doesn't concern him one way or the other. I'm assuming a banner year is in order here, and we see another career high 9 win season at 9-4. 

You can keep all of the receipts on this that you'd like, but you're not going to need them. 

It took the absolute dumpster fire of Charlie Strong to finally break the association I had between wanting Texas' coach to succeed and believing Texas' coach will succeed.

I feel like our last three hires have mirrored the three before those:

1. A great coaching staff that had, over the years, fallen off considerably, is finally let go, to be replaced by a good defensive coordinator who had had limited head coaching success elsewhere, only to then struggle to even achieve a winning season.

2. Hey, hiring a great defensive coach didn't work, let's hire a great offensive mind instead! BUT... make sure he's an insufferable arrogant dickhead who everyone hates. He wins some games he shouldn't, we see more success, but it's clear the program isn't going in the right direction (and we really don't want to put up with that shithead any more). Questionable choices re: drugs.

3. I'm stunned. I'm pissed. Why did we hire THIS guy? But then the guy comes in, says all the right things, hires a great supporting cast, and we're recruiting as well or better than anyone in the country. First couple of years are rough, and we ride the last guy's running back talent to some ok shit, then the recruiting matures AND WE ARE WINNING BIG... except for the big ones. Always seem to be coming just short of the gold. Goddamn OU. (One obvious difference: Mack almost never lost games he should've won.)

The parallels among the last 6 coaches (7, really, because Akers seems like he more or less fits in the Mack/Sark mold, but maybe not so much on the nose?) are uncanny and really seem to describe Texas Football since DKR.

But while I'm not confusing hope and belief any more, I'm not panicking either.

1. Past results doesn't guarantee future behavior. We've never seen a sober Sark as a head coach.

2. The whole NIL thing, which has the potential to turn our recruiting into a machine like what we had in the days before scholarship limits.

3. The games haven't been played yet.

 

Edited by Rimbo
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2 minutes ago, Rimbo said:

He was a wine drinker.

It was a big deal back then.

He drove around campus in his convertible sipping his Chardonnay. I got a great Polaroid of it back when I was on campus. I have it somewhere. He also had a team completely mutiny on his ass. Arizona thanks us. 

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1 hour ago, Js1 said:

Jesus Christ, we lost to OU. Go touch grass or something. 

 

Yes. We lost to OU. Our biggest rival, and for most of the past several decades, the gatekeeper to winning any kind of title.

If that's not a big deal to you, fuck off.

 

1 hour ago, Deej said:

So we only win two more games? Just when I thought you couldn't be a bigger dumbass. 

 

Like I said... Games haven't been played yet. We've seen inexplicable collapses from Sark even while he coached here.

 

58 minutes ago, Duane Moore said:

I strive to not seek out future sorrows so that I can get a head start and start experiencing them for a longer period of time.
 

My standard in the preseason was 10-2 and an appearance in the Big 12 Title Game. That’s still on the table and given the state of the league still appears more likely than not. I’ll just wait to see how things play out before deciding that we’re not getting there and being miserable about it. 

 

I strive to be realistic about my expectations (I did NOT think we had title winning talent this year) and, again, keep what I hope happens separate from my expectations.

 

43 minutes ago, hobbes2702 said:

We definitely needed this thread. None of this info has been posted anywhere else.

 

Oh, fuck off; if you can't enjoy CTJ's flowery bulshitting and can't grasp why it should be featured in its own thread, you're probably the kind of unwashed philistine who thought The Last Jedi was a bad movie.

 

35 minutes ago, Constant said:

Watching Chris Evans GIF by Knives Out

 

Constant, I say this with the deep love and respect that I always have for you: Go back to eating the ripest fruits of Bob Stoops' Fresh Organic Dick Farm and choke on it.

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4 minutes ago, Rimbo said:

If that's not a big deal to you, fuck off.

The season isn't over.  it was one game out of 12.  

Go ahead and mourn.  But fuck off for being a raging bitch about a football game. 

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2 minutes ago, MissingInAction said:

Friday The 13Th Horror GIF by filmeditor

We wouldn’t be if Sark would CHOOSE to be a HC and keep his involvement in OC stuff to a minimum. He can recruit and he has the support of the team and seems to hire good staff for the most part. He can’t do both but if he’s going to insist on it as I posted in the 3rd and 9 thread his ass needs to be in a booth and not squatting on the sideline with his nose buried in the playbook. Also I see your reference and raise you:

giphy.gif

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I think the defense will be fine. They got to get some stuff figured out pertaining to containment which is easily fixable, and they have done that well before this game. Gabriel didn’t really hurt us either in terms of reading or defense, but rather his ability to scramble on down and distances. I thought this was interesting although I feel he didn’t flip a switch. PK did the heavy lifting for him.
 
Jaylan Ford obviously went out on the town (maybe took Sweat and Murphy with him?) Friday before the game and missing Watts hurt us containing Gabriel. Even with the turnovers, the D and one big special teams fuckup lost the game for us.
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25 minutes ago, Nicole44 said:

Losing to OU is a big deal. It should always be as big a deal to us as it is to them. They have the trophies and the Heismans and the appearances in the CFP to show for it

It is known throughout college football history that 99.9% of HC swho are also heavily involved as OCs do not win MNCs. They don’t. Spurier won in 1996. Jimbo Fisher at FSU. The list is short.
 

Mack Brown figured out far too late that winning the RRR and the Big 12 fucking matter in addition to his other flaws. Mack Brown probably has the best team he’s likely to have at NC and I had them picked to make the CFP in OG poster’s thread. I wanted to pick UT but didn’t because Sark. That’s it. It matters to lose to OU and it should always matter.
 

I think the Sark supporters can’t criticize him nor accept that this weekend was a big deal leaving us with no room for error. He cannot be both and OC and a HC. Unless he decides to pick one hat the odds of us winning a MNC or even a Conference Championship are pretty slim. Win out and yes, I think we have a damn good chance to beat OU and Sark will have prepared and scripted a great game like he did Bama. 
 

I just wish those who are black out drunk on Sark Koolaid would just stop attacking those of us who are reticent and hesitant to chug the whole keg of the shit y’all are on. We aren’t idiots. We just see things differently. And there is enormous precedent for HCs trying to be also OCs that don’t win shit plus Sark’s past HC stints. Many of the same people jumping the asses of the posters critical of Sark were high on Strong until proven wrong, high on Herman until proven wrong. 
 

I am proud of Sark for conquering his demons (I have to take his word on this) and as I have been sober since 4/24/22 I understand and applaud that. I have to wonder though if he thinks he can still accomplish what he could not at Washington and USC bc he wasn’t sober and that was the missing piece. The truth is it is his stubborn insistence on being both OC and HC and that list is short short short of HCs who have won and kept their jobs and aren’t either coordinators, on their second or third teams, fired or retired. That list is LONG. Or we could ask Kliff K about his one way ticket to Thailand sometime. 

You went on and on about the sonny dykes show, so there is some hesitancy to listen to any of the shit you just typed. Have you watched tcu play this year? Do you still want what dykes has going? who is the flavor of the month this time? west virginia's head coach? Sark has turned around the staff, the recruiting, the culture, and it shows everywhere you look. Mack brown era we throw a pick to start the game and oklahoma fucking mud holes us. Bama storms back to take the lead during mack or herman times and we get mud holed. I do understand the frustration but at the end of the day we are 5-1 and this team battles, they fight their asses off for 4 quarters. Our stating qb threw two picks and fumbled once, if I told you that before the game started you think we lose by 4 with a chance to win it at the end????? I will still be here when we run sark off and hire Herman 2.0 lol. 

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1 hour ago, ClubWhatever said:

Impeccable logic there, sir

I don't expect much from most posters, but I do expect you to grasp absurdities when you see them. 

1 hour ago, Deej said:

So we only win two more games? Just when I thought you couldn't be a bigger dumbass. 

I explained in the post the origins of the nickname. I didn't give it to the guy.

1 hour ago, Pam Cummings said:

Sarklostagain remains the worst nickname i've ever seen. If you don't like the guy, Farce-isian rolls off the tongue much better.

 

I'm not with you, OP, but you're welcome for showing you how to not look like an uncreative buffoon when you insult the coach.

I like Farce-isian and hadn't heard that one before. I'll start mixing it in. If you have any others, throw them out there. 

1 hour ago, mannewers said:

No wonder our fanbase catches so much shit. How many teams go undefeated in a season on average? Did anyone here actually expect that going into the season?

Yet here we are, lose a game coach sucks, blah blah blah...

blOU was put in a position that they had to make plays during the last 75 seconds to win the game. They managed to do it, discussing that is a different topic. Which many of you have done in spades. Hindsight is 20/20.

Team played like dog shit, the could have turtled but didn't. Not sure that would have happened anytime in recent memory.

Why don't you give the coaches and players a chance to accomplish what many thought would be progress? Win 10+.

Buy hey, you do you. Be sure to come thump your chest, because you called it, if the wheels come off your beloved program.

I came into this season knowing I'd be happy with 10 wins, anything over would be gravy. It's still on the table and I'll continue to believe they get there.

I don't have to give the coaches and players anything, echeese. They get to finish the season whether I want them to or not.

58 minutes ago, WinningIsHard said:

The smartest guy in the room needs you to know he’s laughing at you though, and that he always knew sark was a failure despite picking them to play in the CFP. Lol 

Part of what I love about you is that you get me on a deeper level and it is extremely gratifying.

 

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22 minutes ago, Rimbo said:

Like I said... Games haven't been played yet. We've seen inexplicable collapses from Sark even while he coached here.

You honestly think we are going 2-4 in the last six games?  Whatever...

We lost to OU by a single score. Should we have lost? No, but you're acting like it was 77-0 and the entire team shit the bed completely. Maybe take the rest of the season off if you if this loss was too traumatizing for your fragile little being. 

I can understand everyone losing their shit on Saturday afternoon, full of emotions and alcohol, but it's 48 hours later. 

Edited by Deej
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My stubborn insistence on Sark not being both OC and HC has a precedent and a very important one. I posted it in the 3rd and 9 thread but it’s a ten year old article that quotes Sark:

https://www.latimes.com/sports/la-xpm-2013-sep-17-la-sp-0918-football-play-calling-20130918-story.html
 

Don’t want to read it cool here is a salient excerpt:

“Coaches such as Kiffin, Washington State’s Mike Leach, Arizona’s Rich Rodriguez and Washington’s Sarkisian — all from the Pac-12 Conference — fall into the “actively involved” category. Leach said he might stop if he ever got tired of it, but added, “There is no end in sight.”

Taking the play sheet from these guys is tantamount to yanking a lollipop from a kid’s mouth.

“Half the reason I coach is because I call plays,” Sarkisian said. “I got hired for a variety of reasons. One reason was my play calling. I’m not saying that in an arrogant way. Play calling is one of my strengths.”

Sarkisian didn’t seem to be paying enough attention to the other side two years ago when Washington’s defense ranked among the nation’s worst. The situation is much improved now with coordinator Justin Wilcox and the Huskies are ranked in the top 20 of both major polls.”

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2 minutes ago, Hookem2147 said:

You mean the other pass to Stoops over the middle and the PI?

Yeah, those would have definitely been different if Muhammad was in press coverage.

You think lining up 15 yards off the ball in that situation is the right strategy? There’s a difference in press coverage and playing base defense….
 

Prevent defense lost us the game on that drive. It’s the stupidest thing we could have done. 

Edited by Wilcox Cummingtonite
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10 minutes ago, WinningIsHard said:

You went on and on about the sonny dykes show, so there is some hesitancy to listen to any of the shit you just typed. Have you watched tcu play this year? Do you still want what dykes has going? who is the flavor of the month this time? west virginia's head coach? Sark has turned around the staff, the recruiting, the culture, and it shows everywhere you look. Mack brown era we throw a pick to start the game and oklahoma fucking mud holes us. Bama storms back to take the lead during mack or herman times and we get mud holed. I do understand the frustration but at the end of the day we are 5-1 and this team battles, they fight their asses off for 4 quarters. Our stating qb threw two picks and fumbled once, if I told you that before the game started you think we lose by 4 with a chance to win it at the end????? I will still be here when we run sark off and hire Herman 2.0 lol. 

Didn’t ever say I want Sark fired or think he should be run off. Just pointing out that he’s likely not elite enough to overcome the HC cannot be an OC and win a MNC deal. I thought what Dykes did last year was great. I didn’t think it was sustainable but I’d still take the year they had last year over what we’ve endured since Colt left the 40 acres. Having said that Sark has done a lot of the right things. Never said otherwise. We also have elite talent and depth now bc @closetojumping @immamac @RGBIII @SydneyCarton @SquishMitten and many others saw to it we’d be at the forefront of NIL and all that shit. If we’re going to pick apart all my posts because of a bad take here and there then pretty much everyone on this board should stop posting including yourself. 
 

Sark also went 8-5 with Bijan and Rojo. And then after losses said we should have run the ball more even though he was calling the damn plays. Think about that. My complimenting Dykes had more to do with the fact he managed to cobble together a Frankenstein team and do what we couldn’t do. I said it wasn’t sustainable year over year. But he out Coached Sark last year. Dykes likely won’t again. We are doing a lot of the right things. Dykes did what he had to do to get recruiting momentum. It’s not as sustainable. Not unless you start getting a pipeline. 

Edited by Nicole44
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1 minute ago, Nicole44 said:

Didn’t ever say I want Sark fired or think he should be run off. Just pointing out that he’s likely not elite enough to overcome the HC cannot be an OC and win a MNC deal. I thought what Dykes did last year was great. I didn’t think it was sustainable but I’d still take the year they had last year over what we’ve endured since Colt left the 40 acres. Having said that Sark has done a lot of the right things. Never said otherwise. We also have elite talent and depth now bc @closetojumping @immamac @RGBIII @SydneyCarton @SquishMitten and many others saw to it we’d be at the forefront of NIL and all that shit. If we’re going to pick apart all my posts because of a bad take here and there then pretty much everyone on this board should stop posting including yourself. 

Mercy, you said he will never stop being the OC which will result in him never winning like we should. That gets you fired at Texas. You don't have to say those exact words for the end result to be the same. TCU had a cinderella season, didn't win the big 12, and were humiliated on live tv by georgia. If Texas has become a school that looks for cinderella seasons then Sark is absolutely your perfect coach lol. I'll drop it though, sorry. 

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2 hours ago, Js1 said:

Jesus Christ, we lost to OU. Go touch grass or something. 


No shit.  The hyperbolic rhetoric, self-importance, and the words ---- the endless words! ---- are a bit much, aren't they?

My grandfather always said you can tell a lot about a man by how he reacts to adversity.

 

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2 minutes ago, Not a Sock said:

Not gonna lie this thread makes the outlook on the season way more positive for me, only because CTJ posted it. Much like the “Tom Herman is pressing his bare ass up to your mirror” thread on shaggy after the shitty 2018 Tulsa win. 

The Bama gargling balls post was way more egregious lol.  

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1 hour ago, mdmost said:

The goal should always have been winning the Big 12, not worrying about making the playoff. We still have a chance to win the Big 12 but we have zero margin for error and probably need help to stay at #2. That said, everyone was shitting on how terrible the Big 12 was and it probably still is. WVU has won numerous close games. That's not going to continue to happen unless they're this year's TCU. Sure, there are many loseable games left on the schedule. It's foolish to think otherwise. It would be nice if we'd stop having posters make declarative threads about how unbeatable our team is or likening them to 2005's team that was perfection. Losing to OU, our lone rival in a game where we tend to never have the same chip on our shoulder that they do, was always a possibility. Pretty sure ctj told us otherwise last week but we all drink the koolaid time to time. 

But I am tired of our coaches not putting a huge ass chip on our shoulders going into that game…. And every other conference game for that matter. Stop treating any game like it’s “just another day at the office”. 
Those players need to come out of the tunnel frothing at the mouth and spitting blood with murder in their eyes instead of looking like tourists.

Everybody does it against us without fail, yet too often our coaches and players seem so lackadaisical.

Get FIRED UP dammit!

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