Leaving kids overnight

[luke duke 6412]

How old were your kids the first time you let them stay at the house overnight by themselves? Are your kids dipshits or responsible?

[BigDHornfan 6546]

My dipshit is 11 and we can't even trust him to stay by himself long enough for us to get the mail.

[Mo Horn 8832]

Their senior year of high school, but we had a neighbor who was available and they could go over there if needed/wanted. They were both pretty responsible. 

[CoTex 1160]

I went to a party once that was thrown by some girl whose parents were out of town.  I'm sure it was initially intended as a small get=together but by the time I arrived there were hooligans poppin' bottles out of the parents wine stash.  Lotsa bottles.  

I stayed less than one hour but lingered long enough to witness a young man retrieve a stuffed blue crab from the freezer, and then throw it like a ninja throwing star into a wall.  The thing was this was a tall wall in an area of the home with 15-20 foot ceilings.  The crab disappointed and did not stick but it did leave damage.

So, I think you're good.  As long as they're over about 12, what could possibly go wrong?

[burntorangebongos 10710]

Credit cards? Fuck that! Have good shit pre-made for them and they have no need for food delivery. Every other thing like plumbing emergency and the plumber can call you for card number. 

[burntorangebongos 10710]

Every kid is a dipshit who will succumb to peer pressure to have a party if they are in high school. Because in their pro/con analysis in their governorless brain, it will always be worth it. Be a hero to the whole school and have the party people will talk about for years over pissing off people who will still love you and forgive you in time. The nicer your home, the more likely they get uninvited guests. Call a neighbor to watch them and maybe you can do it. 

[Biff Tannen 45673]

4 minutes ago, burntorangebongos said:

Every kid is a dipshit who will succumb to peer pressure to have a party if they are in high school. Because in their pro/con analysis in their governorless brain, it will always be worth it. Be a hero to the whole school and have the party people will talk about for years over pissing off people who will still love you and forgive you in time. The nicer your home, the more likely they get uninvited guests. Call a neighbor to watch them and maybe you can do it. 

I had one party at my parent's house in high school and the next door neighbor, who had a daughter my age, was home and obviously told my parents.  I wasn't very smart.

[conVINCEd 21469]

My cousin threw a party in high school when her parents were gone for one night.   My uncle anticipated shenanigans would occur, so he had a couple of his college DL teammates swing by the house around 10:00.  It is my understanding that the place cleared out pretty quickly.  I never did anything like that because my next door neighbor growing up was a cop who tolerated no bullshit whatsoever.

[WithoutAClue 15343]

I was 16 the first time my parents left me home alone.

I managed not to burn the house down...

[MonkeyDoughnut 10232]

The high school crap we used to do I have to think is way more difficult now.  Everyone has cameras outside and many even inside.  That said multiple kids but oldest was probably 15 before we left them home "alone" for a single night.  More than one I think helps... they'll keep an eye on each other and/or rat each other out.

 

adding... this was pre-"everyone has a phone". Now much easier to facetime to check on "them"...

Edited November 30, 2023 by MonkeyDoughnut

[66BUFF 2562]

[luke duke 6412]

One night, back before lunch the next day. Not the least bit concerned about a party.

Starting in about 6-7th grade I was frequently left in charge of my little sister while my parents went to 250 miles away for the weekend. This is well before cell phones. I don’t ever recall them calling to check-up on us. Only one party was had late in high school.

My wife wants to wait until the kids are 40.

I think there’s some compromise to be had.

[burntorangebongos 10710]

Your parents played with fire!  Also... NERD!!!

[Guest]

1 hour ago, luke duke said:

How old were your kids the first time you let them stay at the house overnight by themselves? Are your kids dipshits or responsible?

at our house?  probably when the oldest was 16 and his lil bro was 11.  Something like that.

No they were not little shits- they act like their mom.  We also had 2 different neighbors that were mother hens, in a good way.  pretty much everyone on our street knew each other.  It was a cool situation.

FWIW, I think there is no one right answer.  It comes down to your kids, the neighborhood, and how far away is adult help( not 911, but family/ neighbors.)

[immamac 42839]

a mature/responsible self-sufficient 13 year old if you have local emergency contacts/help (an aunt/uncle, grandparents etc) otherwise 16+ with DL. 

That's where I'd be at. I'm not sure if there is a law around this though. 

Here's what bard says:

So you are facing criminal stuff under 15 if something goes down. 

[Guest]

1 hour ago, CoTex said:

I went to a party once that was thrown by some girl whose parents were out of town.  I'm sure it was initially intended as a small get=together but by the time I arrived there were hooligans poppin' bottles out of the parents wine stash.  Lotsa bottles.  
 

If anyone drank up all of my wife's wine, I would not be able to protect them.  LOLz.

[YGIFS 19450]

As stated, I think the ability to constantly check in via webcams/nest/smartphones/etc. can be a difference-maker.  I was left alone or with my special-needs sister overnight all the time in junior high.  But it was a different time.  

One weird story was a few years back, my neighbor calls us outta the blue.  Their backyard "smart" camera or whatever saw that their youngest son had like a dozen friends over to swim in the pool and there were obviously beer bottles 'n shit visible in frame.  The kid isn't picking up the phone (for obvious reasons).  So she asks if I'll walk my phone over there and tell him he has to take the call from Mom.  I don't want to embarrass the kid and have his friends egg my house later, but I realize I gotta do it (they were in NY at the time).  The Dad grabs the phone from wife as I'm walking over my phone.  He was an NYPD cop for a year before going to law school so he's proficient with firearms.  So I'm walking over the phone and he's apologizing for putting us in this awkward position.  So I just say, "Ben, your parents are on the phone.  You need to take this, bring my phone back when you're done."  5 minutes later, his friends start leaving and he walks the phone back over.  His parents are overly-apologizing and telling me they regret leaving him home alone for the weekend and that he's not mature enough to be left alone yet even during his senior year.  Hour later, Dad calls and asks me to make sure their guns are still locked up because maybe Ben had taken some out to show off to his friends.  He saw the son had left to go eat with friends and gave me the codes to get inside and check the gun safe.  All I could think was, "You don't trust this fucking lunatic to stay home by himself but you gave him access to your handgun collection, what the fuck?"  Kid ended up teaching rowing classes to special needs kids on Town Lake and is on academic scholarship at UC-Boulder.  He was a crazy kid though, always misbehaving and pushing boundaries.  But always thought it was weird that they had all these reservations about leaving him home alone but no qualms about giving him a small armory of guns.  

We went about mischief a different way.  Mom went outta town.  I'd tell her I was hosting our church youth group dinner with pizza or taco bell or whatever.  one of the older or college kids would take the call and thank her for letting us have it at her home and what a great son she had.  Story checked out.  We'd get as much Bartles & James we could carry out of Phar-Mor and get fucked up and watch Andrew Dice Clay standup until the weed arrived and finger-banging commenced.  

[txduck87 985]

a mature/responsible self-sufficient 13 year old if you have local emergency contacts/help (an aunt/uncle, grandparents etc) otherwise 16+ with DL. 
That's where I'd be at. I'm not sure if there is a law around this though. 
Here's what bard says:

So you are facing criminal stuff under 15 if something goes down. 

Maryland is nuts. What’s Louisiana? 3?

[Jerry Callo 8700]

We left the girls home for one night when the oldest was almost 15 and the youngest was almost 14.  They weren't dipshits, though.

 

[Dennis Taylor 18812]

Technology has sapped the fun out of being young.  I'm glad I grew up when I did because parents out of town = some level of shenanigans every time 

[NeverMarryAStripper 21898]

My parents left me at home alone frequently for the weekend all through high school.  They knew that I knew that if I threw a party my body would never be found. I did, however, attend all of my friend's parties.  The worst I ever did while left at home for the weekend was get laid in my room.

[52-80 19150]

My dad left me overnight 25 years ago and still hasnt come back

 

 

heyyooooo

[Felix 607]

Mine are all homebodies and introverts.  I think the oldest was around 14 when left for a night, but she had younger sisters.  My parents and brother live within 1/4 mile of my house so they had someone to call if needed but they never did.  I think 13-14 if they aren't idiots and you have a phone tracker on them.

[High Plains Drifter 11035]

1 hour ago, txduck87 said:

Maryland is nuts. What’s Louisiana? 3?

 

I could be wrong, but I think in Florida, its a criminal offense if you don't leave them alone for a night by the time they are ten or so.

 

[Armybrat 40832]

2 hours ago, Dennis Taylor said:

Technology has sapped the fun out of being young.  I'm glad I grew up when I did because parents out of town = some level of shenanigans every time 

High school kid behind us threw a kegger early one summer while mom was working night shift at her hospital. 
Not too loud, but us neighbors knew what was going on. 
Somebody (not me) squealed and the Wilco deputy sheriffs raided the house about 11pm. 
I saw at least 2 dozen kids climbing over the wood privacy fences in all the adjacent back yards to escape - it looked like turning on the kitchen light at midnight in a taqueria and watching the cockroaches take off. 

The escapees broke two of my fence pickets and left both gates open on either side of the house. 

About an hour later we heard a very irate mom chewing ass all the way from their front yard while the sheriff cruisers still had their lights flashing and deputies were searching the premises for “contraband”.

For the next month there was not a light on in that house, and it sold by the end of the summer. 
 
The kid was too dumb to throw a pasture party somewhere further out than our Brushy Creek suburb.

[Dennis Taylor 18812]

2 hours ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

My parents left me at home alone frequently for the weekend all through high school.  They knew that I knew that if I threw a party my body would never be found. I did, however, attend all of my friend's parties.  The worst I ever did while left at home for the weekend was get laid in my room.

And by worst you mean best, right?

[Sbbruin 21841]

Interesting topic.  My wife and i had this convo recently regarding my 17 yo daughter. I was like 12 when I was left home alone.  But it was different back then.  I was left to my own devices at a young age.  My daughter is immature for her age, but more than capable of managing by herself.  My wife is convinced she is not.  What, get a babysitter for a 17 yo?   Fuck all that.  Most babysitters ARE 17 or so.  

[Dennis Taylor 18812]

3 minutes ago, Armybrat said:

High school kid behind us threw a kegger early one summer while mom was working night shift at her hospital. 
Not too loud, but us neighbors knew what was going on. 
Somebody (not me) squealed and the Wilco deputy sheriffs raided the house about 11pm. 
I saw at least 2 dozen kids climbing over the wood privacy fences in all the adjacent back yards to escape - it looked like turning on the kitchen light at midnight in a taqueria and watching the cockroaches take off. 

The escapees broke two of my fence pickets and left both gates open on either side of the house. 

About an hour later we heard a very irate mom chewing ass all the way from their front yard while the sheriff cruisers still had their lights flashing and deputies were searching the premises for “contraband”.

For the next month there was not a light on in that house, and it sold by the end of the summer. 
 
The kid was too dumb to throw a pasture party somewhere further out than our Brushy Creek suburb.

Sounds like mom overreacted quite a bit. I've been led to believe by a thread, perhaps on this very website, that nurses can be a little freaky themselves.  

A couple fence planks is fairly harmless in the overall scheme of things I'd hope. Lord knows I would be a colossal hypocrite if I bitched about teenagers doing something similar to my house, especially in the act of fleeing Johnny Law

[Armybrat 40832]

I didn’t complain.

Laughed about it when talking to one of the deputies, then nailed a couple of spare pickets up the next morning. 
 
When my parents left me home alone for a weekend or a week, I did what NMAS did. 

[4th&Five 41525]

Good topic. My oldest will be 16 in March and we’re hoping to be able to do a night or 2 away by Summer if she stays as responsible as she is now. My parents are 20 minutes away and we have good neighbors if something comes up. 

[gofuckyourself 8209]

10 minutes ago, Sbbruin said:

Interesting topic.  My wife and i had this convo recently regarding my 17 yo daughter. I was like 12 when I was left home alone.  But it was different back then.  I was left to my own devices at a young age.  My daughter is immature for her age, but more than capable of managing by herself.  My wife is convinced she is not.  What, get a babysitter for a 17 yo?   Fuck all that.  Most babysitters ARE 17 or so.  

To make a ruling on this I'll need pics of the wife, babysitter and the 17 ye ... dammit.

Check back with us in a year.

[Dnaguy 11943]

every 80’s and 90’s movie about teens being left alone confirms that this is a wonderful idea that will only result in responsible decisions.

Maybe you’ll luck out and they create a hottie with their computer.

[Guest]

49 minutes ago, Dennis Taylor said:

Sounds like mom overreacted quite a bit. I've been led to believe by a thread, perhaps on this very website, that nurses can be a little freaky themselves.  

A couple fence planks is fairly harmless in the overall scheme of things I'd hope. Lord knows I would be a colossal hypocrite if I bitched about teenagers doing something similar to my house, especially in the act of fleeing Johnny Law

If the cops are at my house, I'm gonna lose my shit.  I'm busting my ass at work and this is what the fuck you do?

Yeah, Mom was righteous in this case.

[nnm 36360]

We never left our high school kids alone overnight. We would have them spend the night at one of their friends’ houses when we went out of town. Our kids were good kids, but they were teenagers in the 2000s and 2010s, and even then social media would have brought a horde of kids there, even if our kids didn’t want them. It’s not worth it. 

We did have the cops call us twice when we left them alone for a few hours to go to a Texans game or something. Once it was because my 7-yo son called 911 “to see what would happen.”  He was alone with his 10-yo sister. When the cops came (that’s what happens when you call 911!), he developed a severe stomachache and had to go to the bathroom suddenly, sending her to the door. He didn’t tell her why the cops were there. Poor girl had to figure it out. The next day I took him down to the police station and had him apologize to the biggest cop I could find. 

One other time we were on our way back from whatever event and the police called. Older sister, probably 16, was supposed to be home watching the younger two. Nope, she snuck out and went parking with basketball stud. Cops busted them (thank you Nassau Bay police!). Cops called me. 

All three kids are now very well adjusted adults. Oldest is a PA, married to a former SF, current paramedic/fireman. Middle is a teacher married to a guy in the ministry. Youngest (who called 911 to see what would happen) is in the ministry. 

When I was a kid, we lived so far out in the country in the mountains in northern NM, we couldn’t have had a party. We were feral children, left to our own devices. I don’t remember the first time my parents left us alone, but I’m sure my older sister couldn’t have been more than 13, making me around 9 at the time. 

[BearSchlong 8083]

Allegedly, my ex-wife’s father would drive her from DeKalb to Love field, grab his suitcase from the trunk, and tell her to drive his car home. When she was 12.

[nnm 36360]

28 minutes ago, BearSchlong said:

Allegedly, my ex-wife’s father would drive her from DeKalb to Love field, grab his suitcase from the trunk, and tell her to drive his car home. When she was 12.

I dropped off my parents at the airport in ABQ and drove two hours back home when I was 13. 

[tfoolry 8208]

3 minutes ago, nnm said:

I dropped off my parents at the airport in ABQ and drove two hours back home when I was 13. 

[mchookem 16327]

i feel like i was left home alone a lot starting at like 15 maybe. my maternal grandfather was sick/dying (heart disease) for what seemed like a couple years, so my parents pretty regularly traveled from Houston to Palestine during that time. they would take my sister, as she is 9 years younger and was thus still very much a young child. but at some point they determined forcing their teenage daughter to miss school and spend every spare moment around death and dying wasn't great.

however... leaving their teenage daughter home alone regularly probably also wasn't great. it didn't help that during this same time period their marriage was literally disintegrating. they had a lot of adult stuff on their minds and were just not particularly...attentive 😐

let's just say...there were a lot of shenanigans. but to be fair, there were a lot of shenanigans when they were home as well. did i mention they weren't very attentive? 

gawd, it's honestly amazing i didn't end up (fill in the blank). 😜

 

[Longboard Horn 40301]

Man some of y'all were old af. I was 8 year s old when my parents started leaving me at home alone. Plenty of sandwiches had been prepared and days were filled with video games and day time tv consisting of Jerry Springer, Ricki Lake, Jenny Jones and the Maury Show.  

[tx ind 7012]

I got left home by accident once when I was pretty young.  The family was headed to Paris for Christmas and in a rush they forgot me.  I had to defend the house from a couple of low rent criminals but it all ended well.

 

[YGIFS 19450]

I read somewhere that you went on to meet a future President of the United States while staying alone in Manhattan.  And that future Commander-in-Chief?  You guessed it, Donald Stallone.  

It really is something amazing to think about when you look back and realize how quickly a party would come together at somebody's house whose parents had left town, without the power of cellphones.  I mean it wasn't like there some magic phone tree sheet where we'd all call each other at home at 10:00p on a Friday night.  Obviously the parents that were home to hear the phone ring would know what the fuck was going on, it wasn't some impromptu study session.  But magically, you'd tell a handful of people earlier in the day and then voila, there were 50 people at your house drunk off their ass with people sneaking off to bedrooms.  Not a single text was sent, no address looked up on google maps.  It was this unseen magnet that just brought us all together every other weekend for 3-4 years.  How in the world did that happen?  

I'm not kidding.  My mom left town my junior year and took my special needs sister.  We had a swim meet earlier that day.  I told a few guys we could go back to my house and have a few beers with a handful of girls.  I had a fake ID at that point.  Went out and bought some beer and Burger King for dinner.  Literally one hour later.  There's dozens of people in my house drunk off their ass.  And I'm tripping on acid with a whopper in my hand.  Leanna D. whom I had a crush on since junior high walks into my house, she was a senior and had sweater puppies from here to college.  and that was the first time I was convinced we were living in a computer simulation.  Mom came home Sunday night and the house was immaculately clean and trash had been buried in the woods.  

[Guest]

1 hour ago, Longboard Horn said:

Man some of y'all were old af. I was 8 year s old when my parents started leaving me at home alone. Plenty of sandwiches had been prepared and days were filled with video games and day time tv consisting of Jerry Springer, Ricki Lake, Jenny Jones and the Maury Show.  

left at home daytime is way the fuck different than overnight, IMHO.

But yeah, 9 YO for me, because my mother had no choice in a rural environment where she had to work until about 6PM each day in a town 40 miles from our house.  My kids never remotely had the same situation.

The 'feral kids' description up thread is perfect. I'd ride my bike to my buddies' houses and hang out, or grab the pellet gun/ .22 and my dog and go plinking on about a 500 acre farm, with no limits to stay on just our land.  Lots and lots of pickup basketball/ baseball/ football games were had, or we'd swim or fish.  You stayed busy, or at least kept up the appearance of being occupied or the adults would starting finding shit for you to do( AKA work.)  And whatever house you were at, you were considered one of their kids when chores and shit were handed out.  Nobody sat and watched their buddy get hosed.  LOL.

 

 

Edited December 1, 2023 by slorch

[Jerry Callo 8700]

2 hours ago, YGIFS said:

It really is something amazing to think about when you look back and realize how quickly a party would come together at somebody's house whose parents had left town, without the power of cellphones.

On one end of the area was a 7-11 on the other a Taco Bell.  All you had to do was drive by to find out where the party was happening.

[GoPokes83 2240]

My kid’s 11, thinks she’s 15 and has the smartass level of a 23 year old that’s never had her ass kicked. I’ve tried leaving her alone overnight a few times but she always seems to find her way back out of the woods.

[beer 3220]

15 and 17 at the time, but they were both at home.  The 15 year old was 16 before she stayed alone alone without her brother. I would have allowed it sooner but she wasn't cool with it. That was last year. 

[High Plains Drifter 11035]

 

I was left alone a few times in HS. I never threw parties. I'd rather just have a gf over for the night.

#priorties

 

[Gene Parmesan 4005]

5 hours ago, Longboard Horn said:

Man some of y'all were old af. I was 8 year s old when my parents started leaving me at home alone. Plenty of sandwiches had been prepared and days were filled with video games and day time tv consisting of Jerry Springer, Ricki Lake, Jenny Jones and the Maury Show.  

Your parents left you alone overnight at 8? 

[mchookem 16327]

13 hours ago, High Plains Drifter said:

 

I was left alone a few times in HS. I never threw parties. I'd rather just have a gf over for the night.

#priorties

 

[Bevo&Pevo 5131]

On 11/30/2023 at 4:57 PM, Dnaguy said:

every 80’s and 90’s movie about teens being left alone confirms that this is a wonderful idea that will only result in responsible decisions.

Maybe you’ll luck out and they create a hottie with their computer.

At my age the nuclear weapon would be worth more.

[Celery Man 20934]

On 11/30/2023 at 2:18 PM, luke duke said:

One night, back before lunch the next day. Not the least bit concerned about a party.
 

Kinda dorky then -  are you worried a t all about noise complaints from aggressive euphonium practice?