"Brisket for dummies" questions

[jimmyjazz 45893]

For me, it's three-fold, especially if I get my in-laws to pay for the brisket.  

(1) delicious cheap food and I'm the hero

(2) sanctioned drinking for 12-20 hours

(3) I don't have to interact with my family ("Sorry honey, you know I'd love to go to the dinosaur museum with you and the kids but I gotta stay here and tend this beast")

[Trey3216 15345]

Yep.  Smoking brisket is one of the only excuses (outside of tailgating and playing golf early) the wife acknowledges for starting the consumption of adult beverages during pre-breakfast hours.  

[TornACL 7698]

1 hour ago, Jameslaw121 said:

^^^^ He's right you know.

The best part about smoking delicious smoked meats is waking up and having a beer (or whiskey) at 4:00 in the morning when everyone else is asleep and it's just you and the dog.

Sometimes, in my past experience, at 4am it's you, whiskey, and the possum that falls out of the tree above you, almost lands right on top of your head and damn near gives you a heart attack. 

I needed a few more whiskies to calm my nerves after that.

[elfenix 34227]

beer, dog, possum, and the raccoon digging in the trash the neighbors' grandkids left after using the pool while the neighbors were away, which is kinda entertaining because the raccoon somehow gets into the can while standing on top of the lid. 

[jimmyjazz 45893]

16 minutes ago, TornACL said:

Sometimes, in my past experience, at 4am it's you, whiskey, and the possum that falls out of the tree above you, almost lands right on top of your head and damn near gives you a heart attack. 

I needed a few more whiskies to calm my nerves after that.

Well, yeah.  That sounds terrifying.

[Sbbruin 21830]

Arby's got you, fam.

 

[utee94 15808]

That covers the brisket.  But don't forget the ribs!

[Dutch 4465]

2 hours ago, jimmyjazz said:

For me, it's three-fold, especially if I get my in-laws to pay for the brisket.  

(1) delicious cheap food and I'm the hero

(2) sanctioned drinking for 12-20 hours

(3) I don't have to interact with my family ("Sorry honey, you know I'd love to go to the dinosaur museum with you and the kids but I gotta stay here and tend this beast")

This man knows that of which he speaks.  All three of those reasons are damn spot-on.  I have gotten out of a lot of "honey-do shit" by claiming exactly what JimmyJazz posted in #3.  

OP, get your FIL to pay for the brisket (Costco usually has primes for $3.50/pound here recently).  Get some course black pepper, kosher salt (Diamond is best), lump charcoal, and oak and hickory logs. If your FIL doesn't have one, you'll need a charcoal chimney as well (availabe at any hardware store for $15).  Oh, and a bottle of bourbon.  

Then watch these:

 

 

What you make, even on the first go-round, will be better than what these Yankees have ever eaten. Then bask in the adulation and props. You're wife will be so impressed, you'll get a blowjob upon arriving back home.

Edited July 12, 2018 by Dutch

[dark54555 72]

I've done this twice, and it's probably cheating, but it turned out pretty good.

1. Sous vide brisket for 38 hours at 155 degrees.

2. Let rest (chill overnight in fridge)

3. Smoke for 6ish hours at 275 or so.

[jimmyjazz 45893]

Well, that's a twist.

[Jameslaw121 4448]

24 minutes ago, dark54555 said:

I've done this twice, and it's probably cheating, but it turned out pretty good.

1. Sous vide brisket for 38 hours at 155 degrees.

2. Let rest (chill overnight in fridge)

3. Smoke for 6ish hours at 275 or so.

Brisket will only absorb smoke up to about 140 Degrees. So does your brisket take any smoke flavor in?

[jimmyjazz 45893]

Yeah, if you're determined to sous vide, smoke the thing first, and then sous vide to 195 on the nose.

[Napoleon 8666]

On 7/11/2018 at 12:11 PM, Anastasis said:

1. Buy WSM.

2. Got to HEB and purchase an untrimmed cryovac packer. 

3. Obtain coarse ground pepper and kosher salt, mix in 2:1 ratio. Coat brisket thoroughly. 

4. Build fire using minion method, intersperse oak chunks.

5. ????

6. Profit

When in doubt, go to the experts on the YouTube.
 

EDIT: Look at the Franklin videos above. ^ ^ ^

 

Edited July 12, 2018 by Napoleon

[dark54555 72]

33 minutes ago, Jameslaw121 said:

Brisket will only absorb smoke up to about 140 Degrees. So does your brisket take any smoke flavor in?

It had a pretty good smoke flavor.  Not overpowering by any means, though.

With the brisket coming out of the fridge, it takes quite a while for the temperature to rise overall.

[dark54555 72]

27 minutes ago, jimmyjazz said:

Yeah, if you're determined to sous vide, smoke the thing first, and then sous vide to 195 on the nose.

But then you're losing the benefit of the sous vide, which is to not lose any liquid prior to or during the cook.  If you smoke first, you will lose moisture.

[jimmyjazz 45893]

1 minute ago, dark54555 said:

But then you're losing the benefit of the sous vide, which is to not lose any liquid prior to or during the cook.  If you smoke first, you will lose moisture.

Not much.  You certainly don't want to invert the process, for reasons stated above.

I've smoked a brisket until "dark enough" and taken it the rest of the way in the oven, with absolutely zero problems.  I couldn't tell you why it wasn't my best, but it was far from my worst.  I literally ran into a situation where I could no longer babysit it so I said "fuck it" and cooked it at 225 F for like 8 hours.  It came out fantastic.

[immortal13 4059]

3 minutes ago, jimmyjazz said:

Not much.  You certainly don't want to invert the process, for reasons stated above.

I've smoked a brisket until "dark enough" and taken it the rest of the way in the oven, with absolutely zero problems.  I couldn't tell you why it wasn't my best, but it was far from my worst.  I literally ran into a situation where I could no longer babysit it so I said "fuck it" and cooked it at 225 F for like 8 hours.  It came out fantastic.

Ive thought about doing that a couple of times

[Sbbruin 21830]

4 hours ago, Dutch said:

What you make, even on the first go-round, will be better than what these Yankees have ever eaten. Then bask in the adulation and props. You're wife will be so impressed, you'll get a blowjob upon arriving back home.

[FartingMonk 3606]

brisket really isn't that hard.  just season it with sea salt and pepper.  get your smoker to 250 degrees and just wait for the temperature to get to 160 and throw it in the oven until it gets to 195 or leave it on the smoker and waste wood until 195.  then let it rest for 30 minutes.  cut against the grain.  i've never dried out a brisket and i'm an amateur.  now if you happen to dry out your brisket have your bbq joint on speed dial.  

[utee94 15808]

2 hours ago, jimmyjazz said:

Yeah, if you're determined to sous vide, smoke the thing first, and then sous vide to 195 on the nose.

Or, you know, don't sous vide a brisket at all, because a packer-trimmed brisket is the perfect combination of meat, fat, and connective tissue, perfectly designed for smoking low and slow for long periods of time, and coming out perfect.  

[Anastasis 23464]

I just love the fact that a guy with no brisket experience comes here and one of the responses tells him to sous vide it.

[Baboontyme 2809]

Make sure you keep the smoker temperature between 225 and 234.5 or you will ruin it. 

[Firemans4Horn 18036]

Butterfinger rub or bust

[immortal13 4059]

OP must post pics of finished brisket

[workswithseed 2095]

14 hours ago, utee94 said:

That covers the brisket.  But don't forget the ribs!

When I was 6 the family went camping, and my dad and grandpa took me out to some local bbq joint. I asked for a rib sandwich like the one from McDonald's, and they did exactly that. My dad was pissed for some reason, but I had ribs, so I was good. 

[immortal13 4059]

17 hours ago, workswithseed said:

When I was 6 the family went camping, and my dad and grandpa took me out to some local bbq joint. I asked for a rib sandwich like the one from McDonald's, and they did exactly that. My dad was pissed for some reason, but I had ribs, so I was good. 

The fuck?

[GreenspointTexas 9598]

17 hours ago, workswithseed said:

When I was 6 the family went camping, and my dad and grandpa took me out to some local bbq joint. I asked for a rib sandwich like the one from McDonald's, and they did exactly that. My dad was pissed for some reason, but I had ribs, so I was good. 

Lol wut?

[PantsTent 2002]

So, is tomorrow the big day, or Sunday?

 

[workswithseed 2095]

2 hours ago, immortal13 said:

The fuck?

Yeah

[TornACL 7698]

10 hours ago, workswithseed said:

Yeah

Congrats you ate dog meat

[Saint Austin 745]

I'm back.

So on Friday evening, while making a plan for when to begin the smoking process, I got a call from by father-in-law (the destroyer of brisket) and sister-in-law (vegetarian). SIL was concerned that my way of smoking might delay the entire meal, so it was asked that I not smoke anything after all. Fuck it, I wasn't thrilled at the idea of putting in a day's effort for people who wouldn't appreciate the meal anyway, not to mention also paying for the meat.

As a postscript, however, I arrived at FIL's on Sunday, not to his so-called brisket, but to BBQ chicken. 

Apparently FIL did such a shitty job this time, he decided to spare us all his burnt shoe leather, and the poultry was substituted instead. I'll try my virgin smoking attempt sometime later on.

That said, I did at least cook myself a damn good reverse-sear ribeye paired with Jameson for my dinner.

Edited July 16, 2018 by Saint Austin

[immortal13 4059]

After all that you didn't smoke the goddamn brisket? The fuck, man

[Baboontyme 2809]

I'm not sure how you neg rep and I probably wouldn't do it even if I did know, but I would at least strongly consider it. 

[HouTex 1866]

So basically the women in your family fucked this up. I’m curious about where your wife was in all of this.

[Tylerocks 2553]

Man, this thread had potential.  I haz the sads.

Good lookin ribeye though.

[Saint Austin 745]

6 hours ago, HouTex said:

So basically the women in your family fucked this up. I’m curious about where your wife was in all of this.

Correct. Wife actually got sick the night before, so she didn't even go to her family's thing. But she was pissed at her family for first asking us to do all the leg work on the brisket, and then asking us to cancel at the last-minute. Sorry for a brisket blue balls thread.

[TornACL 7698]

People never fail to confuse and disappoint, but I have no idea how your family went from "we want to smoke a brisket" to "let's cook about 3 servings worth of pulled chicken in a crock pot"

 

 

Edited July 17, 2018 by TornACL

[Both Tacos 1806]

You should have said FU, I'm smoking a damn brisket as previously requested.  You want to eat some, it will be there. If you don't, then go get that crock pot shit. Either way, you should have stayed the course and done it up anyways just to show them what a good brisket tastes like. 

[Saint Austin 745]

10 minutes ago, TornACL said:

People never fail to confuse and disappoint, but I have no idea how your family went from "we want to smoke a brisket" to "let's cook about 3 servings worth of pulled chicken in a crock pot"

 

 

FIL wanted me to try it, but SIL found out and got the rest of wife's family to get FIL to withdraw request. That said, I've decided to get my own WSM shortly and will return here with pics of my first attempt.

[utee94 15808]

On the bright side, you didn't spend hours cooking for people that clearly don't know or care about BBQ.
 

You're gonna be ok, Saint Austin.  

[Deej 76756]

6 hours ago, Both Tacos said:

You should have said FU, I'm smoking a damn brisket as previously requested.  You want to eat some, it will be there. If you don't, then go get that crock pot shit. Either way, you should have stayed the course and done it up anyways just to show them what a good brisket tastes like. 

Should have done it up and told them they don't get any, and to eat their chicken. 

[immamac 42838]

Holy fuck what a let down.