Doesn't Have a Leg to Stand On, aka Dumb Criminal Stories

[gofuckyourself 8688]

I didn't see a "dumb criminal" thread so delete/ban/merge/etc. as needed.
 

A student persuaded by his friend to get his legs amputated for a $1.3 million insurance scam wound up getting only $7,200 that he now has to return.

https://www.yahoo.com/news/student-persuaded-friend-legs-amputated-071127189.html

Some highlights:

On January 26, 2023, Liao and Zhang rode around Taipei on a motorbike at night, wanting to present the claim that Zhang was afflicted with frostbite while riding the vehicle in the late evening, investigators said.

Just days before, Zhang bought several expensive policies for life insurance, travel insurance, and accident insurance.

The Criminal Investigation Bureau said the man soaked his feet for 10 hours in dry ice to get frostbite.

But medical staff sensed something was amiss while assessing him, such as:

The weather on the night of January 26 was nowhere close to below freezing, with its coldest temperature at about 42 degrees Fahrenheit.

[Chooky 13321]

The classic tale was the guy who picked up a manhole cover, smashed a storefront window, grabbed a bunch of loot and then fell through the hole on his getaway. Smashed his face on the side of the hole and broke his leg. 

[markstanco 12663]

This thread has potential.

[WhatTheBuck 28838]

16 hours ago, gofuckyourself said:

I didn't see a "dumb criminal" thread so delete/ban/merge/etc. as needed.
 

A student persuaded by his friend to get his legs amputated for a $1.3 million insurance scam wound up getting only $7,200 that he now has to return.

https://www.yahoo.com/news/student-persuaded-friend-legs-amputated-071127189.html

Some highlights:

On January 26, 2023, Liao and Zhang rode around Taipei on a motorbike at night, wanting to present the claim that Zhang was afflicted with frostbite while riding the vehicle in the late evening, investigators said.

Just days before, Zhang bought several expensive policies for life insurance, travel insurance, and accident insurance.

The Criminal Investigation Bureau said the man soaked his feet for 10 hours in dry ice to get frostbite.

But medical staff sensed something was amiss while assessing him, such as:

The weather on the night of January 26 was nowhere close to below freezing, with its coldest temperature at about 42 degrees Fahrenheit.

Now his friends will call him Neil. 

[crash_davis 23159]

16 hours ago, gofuckyourself said:

I didn't see a "dumb criminal" thread so delete/ban/merge/etc. as needed.
 

A student persuaded by his friend to get his legs amputated for a $1.3 million insurance scam wound up getting only $7,200 that he now has to return.

https://www.yahoo.com/news/student-persuaded-friend-legs-amputated-071127189.html

Some highlights:

On January 26, 2023, Liao and Zhang rode around Taipei on a motorbike at night, wanting to present the claim that Zhang was afflicted with frostbite while riding the vehicle in the late evening, investigators said.

Just days before, Zhang bought several expensive policies for life insurance, travel insurance, and accident insurance.

The Criminal Investigation Bureau said the man soaked his feet for 10 hours in dry ice to get frostbite.

But medical staff sensed something was amiss while assessing him, such as:

The weather on the night of January 26 was nowhere close to below freezing, with its coldest temperature at about 42 degrees Fahrenheit.

He was at the head of the line for Determination and Conviction while they were handing out Intelligence.

[gofuckyourself 8688]

Just a hunch that Florida will be represented well.

This one's about a year old, but there's no statute of limitations on "durrr":

Man tries to assemble stolen electric scooter in front of Target [where he had just stolen it]

https://news3lv.com/news/offbeat/dumb-criminal-man-attempts-to-assemble-stolen-electric-scooter-in-front-of-store-florida-razor-theft-busted-flagler-county-drugs-arrested

According to the Flagler County Sherriff's Office, the man was witnessed walking past cashiers and out Target's front door without paying for the scooter worth $539.99. Officials say that instead of fleeing the scene of the crime the man stopped on the sidewalk in front of the store and started assembling the scooter. A responding deputy caught the man before he could finish assembling it and gave him a ride to jail.