Houston Astros 2024 Season Thread

[Pimphand 5837]

Just now, Scraps said:

26 minutes ago, Pimphand said:

We wanted Not Dusty more than wanted Espada

Well thats a lie. Y'all knew we weren't getting Dusty back.

I didn't believe it just like I didn't believe we weren't going to resign Mashitty.

[tx 3 putt 77287]

Upcoming probable pitchers for the Astros:

Today: Ronel Blanco vs Bowden Francis

Tuesday: Framber Valdez vs Jose Berrios

Wednesday: Cristian Javier vs Chris Bassitt 

 

I’m excited to see Blanco tonight. Ill need a telescope to see the field from my $6 seat 

[Scraps 13570]

If we get shut down by Bowden Francis we should probably burn it down

[tx 3 putt 77287]

8 minutes ago, Scraps said:

If we get shut down by Bowden Francis we should probably burn it down

 

[Snake Diggity 4627]

I would like to see Scott and Mushinski sent down and Drew Strotman and Luis Contreras brought up.  9 of the 23 pitchers on the 40 man are hurt.  Dylan Coleman is the only healthy 40 man pitcher in AAA.

[UTexasFight 9520]

 

[TonyTexas 10521]

It’s obviously time for a new stadium. MM is in its 24th season. Arlington did it after only 21 years in their previous home.

[tx 3 putt 77287]

[Scraps 13570]

They just cannot overcome that disastrous loss to the Space Cowboys

[n64ra 1087]

1 hour ago, Pimphand said:

0-162 show me a win

[UTexasFight 9520]

1 minute ago, n64ra said:

We do get the Rockies at the end of April. And it’s in Mexico City so will feel like a home game for them with the elevation 

 

(which, I guess, is a good thing for us).

[n64ra 1087]

2 minutes ago, UTexasFight said:

We do get the Rockies at the end of April. And it’s in Mexico City so will feel like a home game for them with the elevation 

 

(which, I guess, is a good thing for us).

yea, maybe we'll win nearly every away game!

[UTexasFight 9520]

I hope we don’t need to call on the ‘88 Orioles support group 

[tx 3 putt 77287]

O/U on a fan with a brown bag over his head ?

[Wulaw Horn 19146]

2 hours ago, Pimphand said:

We wanted Not Dusty more than wanted Espada

I was very clear that I thought Espada was a dumb hire because why get somebody with no track record for a team that should be contending for titles, but also infinitely better than Dusty. Stand by that. 

[runthebone 8027]

Is it Bowden Francis, or is it Francis Bowden?  No Roman number either way?

[tx 3 putt 77287]

top remaining MLB Free Agents still without a team:

1. Tommy Pham
2. Mike Clevinger
3. Brandon Belt
4. Zack Greinke
5. Rich Hill
6. Donovan Solano
7. Evan Longoria
8. Vince Velasquez
9. Aaron Loup
10. Noah Syndergaard

[Gut Wagon 8086]

1 hour ago, n64ra said:

yea, maybe we'll win nearly every away game!

81-0 road record is still doable. Show me a loss! 

[Scraps 13570]

top remaining MLB Free Agents still without a team:
1. Tommy Pham
2. Mike Clevinger
3. Brandon Belt
4. Zack Greinke
5. Rich Hill
6. Donovan Solano
7. Evan Longoria
8. Vince Velasquez
9. Aaron Loup
10. Noah Syndergaard

Sign them all?

[Pimphand 5837]

13 minutes ago, Wulaw Horn said:

I was very clear that I thought Espada was a dumb hire because why get somebody with no track record for a team that should be contending for titles, but also infinitely better than Dusty. Stand by that. 

Yeah I was definitely in the not enthused camp but glad Dusty was out..  Sadly Espada seems to have taken the worst tendencies from both Hinch & Dusty... Obviously he is dealt a short hand with all the injuries so the jury is out but for fucks sake I'm ready for Abreu to die in a fire... I had hoped after he turned it around during the end of last year he would keep that pace up but somehow he's managed to get even worse than early 2023 Abreu.

[YChang 3460]

So er... today would be a great day to start winning yeah?

[tx 3 putt 77287]

Longest Losing Streak to Start a Season: 21 Baltimore Orioles (1988) The 1988 Orioles easily own this mark as the next longest skid was the Cubs' 14-game drought to begin the 1997 season.

[WBT 20650]

1 minute ago, tx 3 putt said:

Longest Losing Streak to Start a Season: 21 Baltimore Orioles (1988) The 1988 Orioles easily own this mark as the next longest skid was the Cubs' 14-game drought to begin the 1997 season.

Hottest joke on the 1st grade recess playground in April 1988:

What do the Orioles and Michael Jackson have in common?

Spoiler

They both wear one glove for no reason

 

[UTexasFight 9520]

Based on start times, we could be the last team without a win if the white Sox and marlins show up!

[Chuckie Finster 22716]

1 hour ago, Scraps said:

1 hour ago, tx 3 putt said:

top remaining MLB Free Agents still without a team:
1. Tommy Pham
2. Mike Clevinger
3. Brandon Belt
4. Zack Greinke
5. Rich Hill
6. Donovan Solano
7. Evan Longoria
8. Vince Velasquez
9. Aaron Loup
10. Noah Syndergaard

Sign them all?

But for real, is there any logical argument against having Brandon Belt in the dugout by first pitch?

[tx 3 putt 77287]

Just now, Chuckie Finster said:

But for real, is there any logical argument against having Brandon Belt in the dugout by first pitch?

calling up loperfido end of may 

[Scraps 13570]

calling up loperfido end of may 

He can take Meyers spot when Jake is hitting .177

[Pimphand 5837]

Even the pedos have figured out this team sucks

[David Dennison 18944]

Y'all really don't get that we won't know anything about this team for months?

[kevwun 15842]

I don't think Loperfido is getting called up before June, but I will be happy to be proven wrong.

[Planet Houston 4930]

10 minutes ago, kevwun said:

I don't think Loperfido is getting called up before June, but I will be happy to be proven wrong.

I fear you’re right. But I also know I’d be a lot happier if Jon Singleton were my weed dealer than 1B for the Astros, so I’m holding out hope. 

[UTexasFight 9520]

3 minutes ago, Planet Houston said:

I fear you’re right. But I also know I’d be a lot happier if Jon Singleton were my weed dealer than 1B for the Astros, so I’m holding out hope. 

You know he’s both for somebody. I’m sure he’s accepting new clients 

[tx 3 putt 77287]

[TejasPedro 1858]

Not asking to go undefeated, just asking to not suck big ol’ donkey balls.

[tx 3 putt 77287]

Im good with moving bregman back to #2 slot and sliding everyone down. 

[Scraps 13570]

Im good with moving bregman back to #2 slot and sliding everyone down. 

If you do anything you split Yordan and Tucker with Bregman.

But at the moment you do not need to do anything.

[tx 3 putt 77287]

Bregman works that pitcher, draws walks, gets on base for yordan, makes that pitcher work

[Scraps 13570]

Yordan is the least of my fucking worries

[Scraps 13570]

After we win tonight in Space City unis yall are gonna want them every game

How the tables will have turned

[Rockethorn1978 6102]

1 hour ago, David Dennison said:

Y'all really don't get that we won't know anything about this team for months?

No thankfully we have you here to set us all straight during all 9 innings every game. 

[David Dennison 18944]

1 hour ago, Rockethorn1978 said:

No thankfully we have you here to set us all straight during all 9 innings every game. 

Challenge accepted.

[Guadaloopy 11011]

[tx 3 putt 77287]

[Planet Houston 4930]

God DAMMIT ABREU YOU FUCKING SUCK

[Welch 635]

Jose Abreu:  Worse on the field or at the plate?

[Smax 3800]

So Abreu has slid into Maldys spot?

[WBT 20650]

Ted!!

[Planet Houston 4930]

There you go Tuck

5 minutes ago, Welch said:

Jose Abreu:  Worse on the field or at the plate?

¿Por que no los dos?

[WBT 20650]

6 minutes ago, Welch said:

Jose Abreu:  Worse on the field or at the plate?

 

[Planet Houston 4930]

Actually no. Way worse at the plate. He’d miss an 88 mph middle-in meatball by a foot. I think he’d catch a dinky flip from the pitcher on a weak groundout in the field.