Let's talk about....incels

[seven 1367]

2 minutes ago, Da Fino said:

Found one. ☝️ 

I also don't understand how guys have sex with women they aren't attracted to just to get some pussy. I tried it once, knew it wasn't for me a few minutes in, faked a nut and peaced out. I'd rather just jerk off. 

[F250 28767]

1 minute ago, Rimbo said:

Well, that wasn't true for me. I wanted to get pussy because I was horny as fuck.

Yeah, I figured like myself most guys were driven by a biological imperative. This was a weird take.

[seven 1367]

I'm not talking strictly about incels, sexual activity in general is down with younger generations. I'm relating to generational attitudes about sex. I think it's just not as important to younger people. I understand that the 50yr olds here won't agree. 

[DixonHur 11296]

6 minutes ago, Rimbo said:

you say that like these are BAD things

maybe is BECAUSE all the pussy is shaved, that's why they lost their drive. Ever think about that?

This reminds me of a friend back in the day who claimed he didn't masturbate because "T-Rex needs to hunt"...dubious claim on the masturbation front, but maybe that's it...pussy is too easy to get now.

[Da Fino 2779]

8 minutes ago, seven said:

I also don't understand how guys have sex with women they aren't attracted to just to get some pussy. I tried it once, knew it wasn't for me a few minutes in, faked a nut and peaced out. I'd rather just jerk off. 

You’re supposed to have sex with the attractive ones. 

[DixonHur 11296]

10 minutes ago, seven said:

I also don't understand how guys have sex with women they aren't attracted to just to get some pussy. I tried it once, knew it wasn't for me a few minutes in, faked a nut and peaced out. I'd rather just jerk off. 

Hey just because we grew up in the 80's doesn't make us @Vic Mackey.  Some of us had standards.

[Nivek 16923]

Without judgment, a lot of you sound like old guys trying to prove how manly you are (were) because back in your day getting pussy was the most important measure. I'm an old millenial but I can somewhat identify with some gen-z characteristics, one of those is giving less of a shit about proving your manhood. I never really understood the crawl over glass obsession with sex. Yeah, it's a fun time but it seems older generations seem to put a lot more emphasis on it.

I hate everything about, you.

(It’s a song by Ugly Kid Joe)

[seven 1367]

For instance, many younger people find sex scenes in mainstream movies to be kinda weird and awkward. I tend to agree, most add nothing at all to a film. I bet many on here have watched a movie specifically for a sex scene. Generational differences! 

1 minute ago, Nivek said:

I hate everything about, you.

(It’s a song by Ugly Kid Joe)

I said I was old too! 

[DixonHur 11296]

2 minutes ago, Nivek said:

I hate everything about, you.

(It’s a song by Ugly Kid Joe)

Thanks, asshole, I'd managed to block that band from my consciousness...now I gotta do it all over again.

[seven 1367]

5 minutes ago, Da Fino said:

You’re supposed to have sex with the attractive ones. 

You must have missed all the incredulous posts about their friends turning down women they weren't attracted to. 

[Rimbo 25919]

12 minutes ago, F250 said:

Yeah, I figured like myself most guys were driven by a biological imperative. This was a weird take.

I did, too, but at a pretty early stage, I realized that most guys were NOT as libidinous as I was.

Slowed down a lot with age, to where I'm able to actually think with something other than my dick from time to time.

[Rimbo 25919]

8 minutes ago, DixonHur said:

This reminds me of a friend back in the day who claimed he didn't masturbate because "T-Rex needs to hunt"...dubious claim on the masturbation front, but maybe that's it...pussy is too easy to get now.

t-rex can't reach

those little baby arms

otherwise t-rex would be fappin like mad

unless t-rex didn't have enough sex drive... hey maybe THAT'S why the dinos died out?

[Rimbo 25919]

i also wonder

when I took my kid to college, I was astonished how butt ass ugly most of the coeds were... potato-shaped fatass bodies with no tits and saggy ass. I expect that among people MY age, but 18-22 year olds? WTF

so maybe that's it, girls are just uglier this generation

[Da Fino 2779]

3 minutes ago, seven said:

You must have missed all the incredulous posts about their friends turning down women they weren't attracted to. 

Must have. I can’t relate. My attraction scale goes binary when I’m horny. 

[DixonHur 11296]

4 minutes ago, Rimbo said:

I did, too, but at a pretty early stage, I realized that most guys were NOT as libidinous as I was.

Slowed down a lot with age, to where I'm able to actually think with something other than my dick from time to time.

In my mid-20's I met a Dermatologist at the gym who had, shall we say, a kink (not kink shaming) where he liked to watch other guys have sex with chicks in front of him.   For a couple of years, he would pay me to have sex with girls at his house while he watched.

These chicks were hot too, so not sure how he convinced them, but I also didn't care at the time.  

[Rimbo 25919]

i mean does a male t-rex even have a dick

apparently birds don't... so probably not

so t-rex didn't wank because t-rex couldn't reach and didn't even have a dick

Just now, DixonHur said:

In my mid-20's I met a Dermatologist at the gym who had, shall we say, a kink (not kink shaming) where he liked to watch other guys have sex with chicks in front of him.   For a couple of years, he would pay me to have sex with girls at his house while he watched.

These chicks were hot too, so not sure how he convinced them, but I also didn't care at the time.  

nice work if you can get it

[DixonHur 11296]

2 minutes ago, Rimbo said:

i mean does a male t-rex even have a dick

apparently birds don't... so probably not

so t-rex didn't wank because t-rex couldn't reach and didn't even have a dick

Interesting rabbit hole, but I think he was just quoting Jurassic Park when they tied the lamb, or whatever, to the stake but T-Rex wouldn't eat it.

2 minutes ago, Rimbo said:

nice work if you can get it

It was the best job I ever had...only stopped to go back to grad school

Edited May 2 by DixonHur

[Al_4_ISU 12457]

Without judgment, a lot of you sound like old guys trying to prove how manly you are (were) because back in your day getting pussy was the most important measure. I'm an old millenial but I can somewhat identify with some gen-z characteristics, one of those is giving less of a shit about proving your manhood. I never really understood the crawl over glass obsession with sex. Yeah, it's a fun time but it seems older generations seem to put a lot more emphasis on it.

I’m an elder millennial (‘85) and I wanted to get pussy because, well, it’s fucking awesome.

There was nothing societal about it. My brain was just wired with a high sex drive. It sounds like yours is less so. There’s nothing wrong with that either, so long as you’re comfortable with yourself and others.

None of this makes you a “man”. But guys who actively despise women because they can’t convince any of them to have consensual sex are definitely not real men.

[Al_4_ISU 12457]

i also wonder
when I took my kid to college, I was astonished how butt ass ugly most of the coeds were... potato-shaped fatass bodies with no tits and saggy ass. I expect that among people MY age, but 18-22 year olds? WTF
so maybe that's it, girls are just uglier this generation

It’s the fucking mom jeans

[seven 1367]

1 minute ago, Al_4_ISU said:

I’m an elder millennial (‘85) and I wanted to get pussy because, well, it’s fucking awesome.

There was nothing societal about it. My brain was just wired with a high sex drive. It sounds like yours is less so. There’s nothing wrong with that either, so long as you’re comfortable with yourself and others.

None of this makes you a “man”. But guys who actively despise women because they can’t convince any of them to have consensual sex are definitely not real men.

I've read your posts on several different topics regarding millenials and we had very different experiences growing up and in high school/college. Not a negative, just something I've noticed and kind of interesting considering we are from generally the same region. The people I've known from small town Kansas are similar to your experiences though. I 100% agree with the last part.

[Al_4_ISU 12457]

I've read your posts on several different topics regarding millenials and we had very different experiences growing up and in high school/college. Not a negative, just something I've noticed and kind of interesting considering we are from generally the same region. The people I've known from small town Kansas are similar to your experiences though. I 100% agree with the last part.

I’m from a very small town and it’s absolutely the reason my youth experience had a heavy Gen X vibe. We were very much 3-5 years behind on a lot of cultural trends.

[Surly Bevo 24908]

I will say one astounding thing.  If it could indeed be proven that the youngs have, as a cohort, a considerably reduced interest in sex, that there are virgins that are perfectly fine with it, etc. then we have stumbled upon quite the breakthrough.  Humans, and all animals in general are hard-wired to survive, adapt and.....reproduce.  There are and have always been a number of individual exceptions.  But, when you start looking at some of the numbers like the ones that lead this thread off..... if one could in fact attribute it to the fact that a primary driving factor in those numbers is youngs are just not as interested in sex and don't any longer have the drive to participate in the act of reproduction then that means that on a much broader non-exception level we are evolving (at a seemingly a breakneck pace).  And, evolving in a way that doesn't follow the general "survival" driven path of evolution.  

Edited May 2 by Surly Bevo

[956 Worldwide 34705]

28 minutes ago, Rimbo said:

i also wonder

when I took my kid to college, I was astonished how butt ass ugly most of the coeds were... potato-shaped fatass bodies with no tits and saggy ass. I expect that among people MY age, but 18-22 year olds? WTF

so maybe that's it, girls are just uglier this generation

We talked about this up thread. I’ve noticed it too, but it’s not a gender thing. The male students are also not in great shape. And I absolutely remember going back to campuses in my late 20s and 30s and thinking “wow, all the people are so attractive.”  This is something that has changed. 

Unfit, lots of weed, SSRIs, and a shit diet is the norm. Not good for the sex drive. 

[Rimbo 25919]

Just now, 956 Worldwide said:

We talked about this up thread. I’ve noticed it too, but it’s not a gender thing. The male students are also not in great shape. And I absolutely remember going back to campuses in my late 20s and 30s and thinking “wow, all the people are so attractive.”  This is something that has changed. 

Unfit, lots of weed, SSRIs, and a shit diet is the norm. Not good for the sex drive. 

I wonder how much of the online lifestyle is connected not so much to "social media bad" but simply that everyone is sitting on their asses now.

[Celery Man 20934]

11 minutes ago, Al_4_ISU said:

I’m from a very small town and it’s absolutely the reason my youth experience had a heavy Gen X vibe. We were very much 3-5 years behind on a lot of cultural trends.

Have you ever read Fargo Rock City by Chuck Klosterman? It’s been like 15 years but I feel like you would dig it. It’s kinda a response to Michael Azerrad’s “our band could be your life” (which is great, about the most influential bands in 80s underground rock). I think he opens it kinda shitting on elitist college rock snobs and talking about how if you didn’t like Motley Crue you never experienced it correctly - blasting in a single cab pickup in a cornfield. Something like that.

[Al_4_ISU 12457]

Have you ever read Fargo Rock City by Chuck Klosterman? It’s been like 15 years but I feel like you would dig it. It’s kinda a response to Michael Azerrad’s “our band could be your life” (which is great, about the most influential bands in 80s underground rock). I think he opens it kinda shitting on elitist college rock snobs and talking about how if you didn’t like Motley Crue you never experienced it correctly - blasting in a single cab pickup in a cornfield. Something like that.

Great book.

I’ve read everything Klosterman has ever wrote. His background (and ingrained worldview as a result) is extremely similar to mine, except I ended up more like his older brother who took over the family farm. Hell, he even looks like my best friend’s brother.

[Da Fino 2779]

10 minutes ago, Rimbo said:

I wonder how much of the online lifestyle is connected not so much to "social media bad" but simply that everyone is sitting on their asses now.

It’s more acceptable now. These kids grew up body positive. No judgement. 

[Captainant 27653]

15 minutes ago, 956 Worldwide said:

We talked about this up thread. I’ve noticed it too, but it’s not a gender thing. The male students are also not in great shape. And I absolutely remember going back to campuses in my late 20s and 30s and thinking “wow, all the people are so attractive.”  This is something that has changed. 

Unfit, lots of weed, SSRIs, and a shit diet is the norm. Not good for the sex drive. 

I really do wonder how much the ubiquity of micro plastics and PFAS/PFOS in literally every facet of life - even the fucking tap water in Texas. It would not surprise me if 15 or 20 years down the line we all learn just how badly we've been poisoning ourselves. This generations leaded gasoline sorta thing

[atomheartbevo 89648]

1 hour ago, Rimbo said:

you say that like these are BAD things

maybe is BECAUSE all the pussy is shaved, that's why they lost their drive. Ever think about that?

Bush is preferable to those of us who like grown-ass women...

But it's all over the place, there's been years where one is more popular than the other, and you can see this with porno videos.

Years back, I worked with a friend producing amateur pornos.  He or I would hang out at gyms, make up some story about how we were an engineer or dermatologist or chef or whatever, and tell dudes at the gym that we would like to watch them have sex with women in front of us, and we'd pay them to meet up at a rental house that we pretended was ours.  We were paying women as well, telling them that we would like to watch them have sex with guys we met at the gym.  After we got both to the house, whoever had recruited the two people would pretend that we were getting off  just watching them have sex, all the while the whole place was rigged with cameras.

If any of those guys or gals ever realized how much money we were making selling videos of them, or that they probably should have checked themselves for STDs afterward, or that we were filming them in the first place, they would have been pissed off.  We didn't even make them sign releases, so in theory they could have sued us, but we tended to pick up good-looking dumbasses and just hoped they never came across videos of themselves.

[Brisketexan 105095]

1 hour ago, seven said:

I'm not talking strictly about incels, sexual activity in general is down with younger generations. I'm relating to generational attitudes about sex. I think it's just not as important to younger people. I understand that the 50yr olds here won't agree. 

Yeah.  This one certainly doesn't agree.

1 hour ago, Rimbo said:

I did, too, but at a pretty early stage, I realized that most guys were NOT as libidinous as I was.

Slowed down a lot with age, to where I'm able to actually think with something other than my dick from time to time.

This too.  I was probably on the higher end of the sex drive bell curve.  Now that I'm of a certain age, it's probably down to "pretty normal."

1 hour ago, Al_4_ISU said:

I’m an elder millennial (‘85) and I wanted to get pussy because, well, it’s fucking awesome.

There was nothing societal about it. My brain was just wired with a high sex drive. It sounds like yours is less so. There’s nothing wrong with that either, so long as you’re comfortable with yourself and others.

None of this makes you a “man”. But guys who actively despise women because they can’t convince any of them to have consensual sex are definitely not real men.

And this.  I was chasing girls with all I had from a pretty early age, and I wasn't pressured by anyone, wasn't trying to impress anyone....I was really, really, really into girls, and wanted as much action as I could possibly get. 

But also, the "guys just don't want sex as much" rings bullshitty to me, kind of a "those grapes are sour anyway" shit.  Why do I say that?  Because "incels" aren't just sitting at home, happy to be playing video games and eating Cheetos.  No...a shitload of them are angry, bitter, and resentful of "Chads" getting all the "Stacies."  If we were just dealing with a lower sex drive, they wouldn't care.  But they care.  Deeply.  They are angry - the the point of becoming violent.

Since the beginning of time, men have chased sex.  Because they want it.  Today is no different.  If young men are dealing with 1) social impetus to just not be that into sex, but underneath, 2) they still have the same biology we all had, and have had for millenia....yeah, I can see why we're dealing with some messed up dudes.

['stache 21802]

9 hours ago, Surly Bevo said:

I will say one astounding thing.  If it could indeed be proven that the youngs have, as a cohort, a considerably reduced interest in sex, that there are virgins that are perfectly fine with it, etc. then we have stumbled upon quite the breakthrough.  Humans, and all animals in general are hard-wired to survive, adapt and.....reproduce.  There are and have always been a number of individual exceptions.  But, when you start looking at some of the numbers like the ones that lead this thread off..... if one could in fact attribute it to the fact that a primary driving factor in those numbers is youngs are just not as interested in sex and don't any longer have the drive to participate in the act of reproduction then that means that on a much broader non-exception level we are evolving (at a seemingly a breakneck pace).  And, evolving in a way that doesn't follow the general "survival" driven path of evolution.  

Modern medicine has dropped infant mortality from very common to very rare. Our species is unique that way and doesn’t require tons of births for survival. If evolution is at play, it makes sense that humans in general can be less interested in sex because it’s not necessary for a woman to pump out a dozen kids hoping that a few survive to adulthood. 

[Thatguy 8686]

12 hours ago, seven said:

I also don't understand how guys have sex with women they aren't attracted to just to get some pussy. I tried it once, knew it wasn't for me a few minutes in, faked a nut and peaced out. I'd rather just jerk off. 

I don't know man, say there is a particular thing you like sexually and you find out there is a woman that is very good at it. She isn't obese or anything but simply isn't what usually does it for you. You mean to tell me that upon finding out said abilities it doesn't ratchet up your interest level? I find that weird.

[Al_4_ISU 12457]

If this trend continues, I might just start hoping my daughter is a lesbian.

[Aqua Buddha 14588]

12 hours ago, seven said:

I also don't understand how guys have sex with women they aren't attracted to just to get some pussy. I tried it once, knew it wasn't for me a few minutes in, faked a nut and peaced out. I'd rather just jerk off. 

Slumpbusters.

Also depends what time it is at the bar.  She's a 2 at 10 and a 10 at 2.

[Thatguy 8686]

10 hours ago, Brisketexan said:

Yeah.  This one certainly doesn't agree.

This too.  I was probably on the higher end of the sex drive bell curve.  Now that I'm of a certain age, it's probably down to "pretty normal."

And this.  I was chasing girls with all I had from a pretty early age, and I wasn't pressured by anyone, wasn't trying to impress anyone....I was really, really, really into girls, and wanted as much action as I could possibly get. 

But also, the "guys just don't want sex as much" rings bullshitty to me, kind of a "those grapes are sour anyway" shit.  Why do I say that?  Because "incels" aren't just sitting at home, happy to be playing video games and eating Cheetos.  No...a shitload of them are angry, bitter, and resentful of "Chads" getting all the "Stacies."  If we were just dealing with a lower sex drive, they wouldn't care.  But they care.  Deeply.  They are angry - the the point of becoming violent.

Since the beginning of time, men have chased sex.  Because they want it.  Today is no different.  If young men are dealing with 1) social impetus to just not be that into sex, but underneath, 2) they still have the same biology we all had, and have had for millenia....yeah, I can see why we're dealing with some messed up dudes.

I think it's simply a case of insecurities. If you interact with young people they spend way too much time in their own world and simply don't know how to interact socially. Take a guy like that. No game. Socially awkward. Match him up with a girl who is also socially awkward due to the same reasons. They want to have sex, but just can't get out of the starting blocks. Time goes by. Insecurities build. More time goes by. Frustration sets in. So on and so forth.

I know you know this having young adults, but these young folks are awkward as hell. Just watching them attempt to interact with each other is cringy. You can sit and watch them missing all the body language cues as well. Just flat out hard to watch.

[Nivek 16923]

And this.  I was chasing girls with all I had from a pretty early age, and I wasn't pressured by anyone, wasn't trying to impress anyone....I was really, really, really into girls, and wanted as much action as I could possibly get. 
But also, the "guys just don't want sex as much" rings bullshitty to me, kind of a "those grapes are sour anyway" shit.  Why do I say that?  Because "incels" aren't just sitting at home, happy to be playing video games and eating Cheetos.  No...a shitload of them are angry, bitter, and resentful of "Chads" getting all the "Stacies."  If we were just dealing with a lower sex drive, they wouldn't care.  But they care.  Deeply.  They are angry - the the point of becoming violent.
Since the beginning of time, men have chased sex.  Because they want it.  Today is no different.  If young men are dealing with 1) social impetus to just not be that into sex, but underneath, 2) they still have the same biology we all had, and have had for millenia....yeah, I can see why we're dealing with some messed up dudes.

There was a spectrum of libido and inhibitions from my experience. Maybe the horn dogs who were inhibited were the ones who morphed into incels?

But also I thought one dude I knew was a horn dog until I met a real pussy hound. The pussy hound was way more successful and put things into perspective. He was also the most focused guy I knew in high school.

[Al_4_ISU 12457]

42 minutes ago, Nivek said:

There was a spectrum of libido and inhibitions from my experience. Maybe the horn dogs who were inhibited were the ones who morphed into incels?

But also I thought one dude I knew was a horn dog until I met a real pussy hound. The pussy hound was way more successful and put things into perspective. He was also the most focused guy I knew in high school.

I think you're on to something here.  The horn dog is definitely a different species from the pussy hound.  I knew a kid in HS who was the absolute definition of a horn dog.  He was always trying to score porn, constantly talking about jerking off and how he wanted to screw pretty much every woman on the planet.  He was just very publicly horny at pretty much all times.  He never had a girlfriend in HS and I don't know if he really figured it out later in life either (haven't seen the kid in 20 years).

A pussy hound generally has a lot more self control/regulation, and like you stated, are often extremely focused.  Especially on getting pussy, which is imperative on essentially killing off your inner horn dog.  There's nothing women find more off putting than that open horniness.  If a horn dog can't get that under wraps, he ain't going to get any, and you're now hurtling towards incel status at warp speed.

[rage-a-holic 4382]

2 hours ago, Al_4_ISU said:

If this trend continues, I might just start hoping my daughter is a lesbian.

why? do you think a woman isn't gonna get her drunk and stick things inside her?

[Al_4_ISU 12457]

Just now, rage-a-holic said:

why? do you think a woman isn't gonna get her drunk and stick things inside her?

A) it's a joke.  I don't give a shit if my daughter is gay or straight.

B) I do think women are less prone to get caught up in this really creepy, toxic, possessive "the world owes me human possessions" mindset

[DixonHur 11296]

Hmm, interesting line of thought.  I think a horn dog is someone obsessed with sex, but not necessarily having it because of shyness, fear or whatever...IE me in HS.  I talked a big game in, but got scared when a girl was like "ok".

A pussy hound is someone, we'll call him "Billy", who gets laid on the regular.  

Some of us, horn dogs, morph into pussy hounds once we hit college, others I suppose don't and start blaming women on the way to becoming Incels.

Edited May 2 by DixonHur

[Al_4_ISU 12457]

9 minutes ago, DixonHur said:

Hmm, interesting line of thought.  I think a horn dog is someone obsessed with sex, but not necessarily having it because of shyness, fear or whatever...IE me in HS.  I talked a big game in, but got scared when a girl was like "ok".

A pussy hound is someone, we'll call him "Billy", who gets laid on the regular.  

Some of us, horn dogs, morph into pussy hounds once we hit college, others I suppose don't and start blaming women on the way to becoming Incels.

This is describes my evolution from HS to college fairly well.  I guess I'm distinguishing between the guys who wear their horniness on their sleeve and the ones who don't.  I think internally nearly every teenage boy is a horn dog.  Some of them advertise it more blatantly than others.

Booger in Revenge of the Nerds was a horn dog.  Donal Logue in the Tao of Steve was a pussy hound.

[atomheartbevo 89648]

2 hours ago, Thatguy said:

I think it's simply a case of insecurities. If you interact with young people they spend way too much time in their own world and simply don't know how to interact socially. Take a guy like that. No game. Socially awkward. Match him up with a girl who is also socially awkward due to the same reasons. They want to have sex, but just can't get out of the starting blocks. Time goes by. Insecurities build. More time goes by. Frustration sets in. So on and so forth.

I know you know this having young adults, but these young folks are awkward as hell. Just watching them attempt to interact with each other is cringy. You can sit and watch them missing all the body language cues as well. Just flat out hard to watch.

So should we track down those socially awkward people and bully pressure them on social media about getting laid, and tell them they aren’t a real man (or woman) if they aren’t having sex at least a few times a month year?

[Nivek 16923]

I guess from my perspective there is a branching at the horn dog level.    The horn dog that is too overt but is still managing to score a hit every now and then.   Then there is the unsuccessful horn dog who has the same needs but is riding the pine and reeks of desperation.   

[Nivek 16923]

7 minutes ago, Al_4_ISU said:

This is describes my evolution from HS to college fairly well.  I guess I'm distinguishing between the guys who wear their horniness on their sleeve and the ones who don't.  I think internally nearly every teenage boy is a horn dog.  Some of them advertise it more blatantly than others.

Booger in Revenge of the Nerds was a horn dog.  Donal Logue in the Tao of Steve was a pussy hound.

I don't think so, I think it is a spectrum as well here.  Some are just late bloomers.  Some are never really horn dogs mentally.    

[DixonHur 11296]

3 minutes ago, Nivek said:

I guess from my perspective there is a branching at the horn dog level.    The horn dog that is too overt but is still managing to score a hit every now and then.   Then there is the unsuccessful horn dog who has the same needs but is riding the pine and reeks of desperation.   

As a former horn dog that got laid zero times during HS, I think there is a 3rd fork in that road...horn dogs who had opportunities to get laid but were too scared to actually go through with it.  I hit plenty of triples, but even when the coach was waving me home, I always pulled up until 2 weeks after graduation when I was essentially raped.  Best thing that ever happened to me, because it gave me the confidence I needed.

[Al_4_ISU 12457]

2 minutes ago, DixonHur said:

As a former horn dog that got laid zero times during HS, I think there is a 3rd fork in that road...horn dogs who had opportunities to get laid but were too scared to actually go through with it.  I hit plenty of triples, but even when the coach was waving me home, I always pulled up until 2 weeks after graduation when I was essentially raped.  Best thing that ever happened to me, because it gave me the confidence I needed.

Remarkably similar story to me.  I was mostly too daft in HS to realize that I had some opportunities while also being unwilling to put myself out there and get shot down, when I realized that I might.  My ego couldn't handle it.

I ended up losing my virginity to a very aggressive chick at a party the week before my 18th birthday, and that gave me the confidence I needed to succeed in college.  At pussy I mean.  Not school.

[DixonHur 11296]

3 minutes ago, Al_4_ISU said:

Remarkably similar story to me.  I was mostly too daft in HS to realize that I had some opportunities while also being unwilling to put myself out there and get shot down, when I realized that I might.  My ego couldn't handle it.

I ended up losing my virginity to a very aggressive chick at a party the week before my 18th birthday, and that gave me the confidence I needed to succeed in college.  At pussy I mean.  Not school.

Sounds like we're brothers from another mother.

Fear of rejection was really high on the list...also fear that I'd suck at sex, and she'd tell everyone at school.  This was so strong that I mostly messed around with girls from other schools.  I was also oblivious to clues, so even the action I did get was when the girl made the first move.

[Incredulity 11664]

20 minutes ago, DixonHur said:

Sounds like we're brothers from another mother.

Fear of rejection was really high on the list...also fear that I'd suck at sex, and she'd tell everyone at school.  This was so strong that I mostly messed around with girls from other schools.  I was also oblivious to clues, so even the action I did get was when the girl made the first move.

Not to derail too far, but I think both of your experiences are fairly common.  I was similar.

High school was a series of sexual interactions that were frankly a bit awkward due to inexperience of both participants, plus my read was girls had significant slut-shaming pressure.   Summer post graduation all bets were off and I had fairly satisfying sex with a couple classmates that were obvious flirtations through school.  College reverted a bit in my experience, way different than high school, but there definitely was social brakes on freakiness. The couple of years post college was unleashed.  Zero fucks given on any social pressure to not get it on.   Then I got married( happily so) and kids which really fucks with the sexy time.   

['stache 21802]

35 minutes ago, DixonHur said:

Sounds like we're brothers from another mother.

Fear of rejection was really high on the list...also fear that I'd suck at sex, and she'd tell everyone at school.  This was so strong that I mostly messed around with girls from other schools.  I was also oblivious to clues, so even the action I did get was when the girl made the first move.

I didn’t really mature emotionally until late college right around the time my now wife and I got serious. I was very introverted and lacked any semblance of self esteem in those early years. Fear of rejection was pretty high in the list for why I wasn’t dating or banging at that age. I also was quite traumatized looking back at my strict catholic upbringing. Like crying myself to sleep routinely because I gave in to jerking off. Pretty sure I’d have entered a guilt coma if I had actually had sex with girl. I hate that it’s probably still a major issue for millions of kids. At least I wasn’t molested by a priest, goddamn I hate that part of my life.

[Incredulity 11664]

6 minutes ago, 'stache said:

Like crying myself to sleep routinely because I gave in to jerking off.

thats awful.  Legit sorry to hear that.

my mother walked in on me mid-stroke when I was about 15-16 ish.  Like look you in the eye, look at your hand full of penis, then look you in the eye, gasp turn around and slam door.  I swear I locked the bathroom door.   I spent 15 minutes cold sweating in the bathroom trying to figure out how it was going to be addressed when I exited the bathroom.  

Not a word has ever been said.  Thank you, Mom.

 

My wife doesn't have any brothers.  She goes pretty white when I describe to here what our son will be like from  something like 14-leaving for college.