Let's talk about....incels

[Rimbo 26,111]

45 minutes ago, DixonHur said:

Damn, it...if only I knew what low brass meant, I coulda been a contender.

 

[Samson's Wig 3,194]

4 hours ago, DixonHur said:

I remember checking the phone to see if it was working while expecting a call, and then immediately panicking, thinking they may have tried to call while I was checking to make sure the phone was working.  Having 2 lines was definitely a game changer.

We had a party line when I was a teenager.  Finally got a dedicated line senior year.  I think back on those years of basically never using a phone fondly these days.  It created zero impediments to hooking up, you just had to get out and go somewhere.

[Da Fino 2,784]

43 minutes ago, Al_4_ISU said:

Catholic sexual repression is very real. Especially about masturbation.My grandma knocked my dad out with a rolling pin when he was in grade school because she thought he was jerking off at the dinner table. He claims he was just scratching. My grandma denies it ever happened but at least one of my uncles remembers.

Man…I don’t think I would file that under catholic sexual repression. 

[Nivek 16,986]

4 hours ago, SimonBolivar said:

We had a family friend that died a few years back that was worth about $15M and never married or had a significant other. He was a really strict Catholic and ended up leaving all $15M to the church. When we went to help clean up his place after he passed there was gay porn everywhere and it made us really sad that he sat there with millions and millions all the while he never lived his best life because church. 

Wait, he left the Church 15 million and you were the clean up crew?  haha

[chainsaw 9,873]

27 minutes ago, Samson's Wig said:

We had a party line when I was a teenager.  Finally got a dedicated line senior year.  I think back on those years of basically never using a phone fondly these days.  It created zero impediments to hooking up, you just had to get out and go somewhere.

Internet makes it possible to talk to multiple women simultaneously.

[Brisketexan 105,337]

Internet makes it possible to talk to multiple women simultaneously.

Counterpoint: there are no real women on the internet.

[chainsaw 9,873]

1 minute ago, Brisketexan said:

Counterpoint: there are no real women on the internet.

You'll end up bloated and floating by Rainey street with that kind of talk

[Mole 4,333]

3 hours ago, Rimbo said:

now me, I'd go for the band nerd stepsister.

1. band chicks, especially low brass, are the best kissers

what's not to love?

A band nerd dirty joke:
 

A girl went out on a date with a trumpet player, and when she came back her roommate asked, "Well, how was it? Did his embouchure make him a great kisser?"

"Nah," the first girl replied. "That dry, tight, tiny little pucker; it was no fun at all."

The next night she went out with a tuba player, and when she came back her roommate asked, "Well, how was his kissing?"

"Ugh!" the first girl exclaimed. "Those huge, rubbery, blubbery, slobbering slabs of meat; oh, it was just gross!"

The next night she went out with a French horn player, and when she came back her roommate asked, "Well, how was his kissing?"

"Well," the first girl replied, "his kissing was just so-so; but I loved the way he held me!"

[Rimbo 26,111]

4 minutes ago, Mole said:

A band nerd dirty joke:
 

A girl went out on a date with a trumpet player, and when she came back her roommate asked, "Well, how was it? Did his embouchure make him a great kisser?"

"Nah," the first girl replied. "That dry, tight, tiny little pucker; it was no fun at all."

The next night she went out with a tuba player, and when she came back her roommate asked, "Well, how was his kissing?"

"Ugh!" the first girl exclaimed. "Those huge, rubbery, blubbery, slobbering slabs of meat; oh, it was just gross!"

The next night she went out with a French horn player, and when she came back her roommate asked, "Well, how was his kissing?"

"Well," the first girl replied, "his kissing was just so-so; but I loved the way he held me!"

You know how you know when you're kissing a French Horn player?

He sticks his hand up your ass.

[Al_4_ISU 12,485]

2 hours ago, Da Fino said:

Man…I don’t think I would file that under catholic sexual repression. 

Are you team child abuse or team justifiable intervention?  The line was frequently blurred in German Catholic families for a very long time.

My grandpa got kicked by a horse when he was 8, and it shattered his hip.  His parents dropped him off at the children’s hospital in Iowa City, which was a 4 hour drive to the southeast in those days.  He was laid up there for 9 months.  His parents never visited.  About 4 months in, he wrote them a letter.  He got a letter back from his grandparents (in German) that instructed him not to be so needy because his parents were busy on the farm and caring for his other 4 siblings.

I come from very hard people.  My dad’s generation made a lot of progress breaking that cycle.  My generation is trying to finish the job.

[Da Fino 2,784]

1 hour ago, Al_4_ISU said:

Are you team child abuse or team justifiable intervention?  The line was frequently blurred in German Catholic families for a very long time.

My grandpa got kicked by a horse when he was 8, and it shattered his hip.  His parents dropped him off at the children’s hospital in Iowa City, which was a 4 hour drive to the southeast in those days.  He was laid up there for 9 months.  His parents never visited.  About 4 months in, he wrote them a letter.  He got a letter back from his grandparents (in German) that instructed him not to be so needy because his parents were busy on the farm and caring for his other 4 siblings.

I come from very hard people.  My dad’s generation made a lot of progress breaking that cycle.  My generation is trying to finish the job.

I was referring to her being mistaken and overreacting when she thought that someone was shooting loads under her dinner table. Take it easy. 

[atomheartbevo 89,799]

I joked about mocking the incels for not getting laid, but on a serious note - a lot of these people proclaiming themselves to be incels, whether publicly or not, probably need at least some pushback from somebody, because there is a shitload of overlap between the incels, Qanon/conspiracy types, etc.

As mentioned earlier, they are going down Internet rabbit holes where nobody is challenging them.  25 years ago, if these people were spouting off insane bullshit about conspiracy theories that they were a victim of or whatever, a parent or sibling or other relative or friend or classmate would usually set them straight, or at the very least, they'd see the people around them not following the stupid bullshit they are pushing. And truthfully, some of that pushback would be basically bullying, as in "you're a fucking idiot for believing that, just lower your standards and go get laid you moron".

Way too many of these incels, as well as school shooters, etc., all seem to have a problem of being enabled by those around them when it comes to stupid shit.  Maybe it's a parent who is too tired from work (or is ill-equipped) to monitor their internet habits or spend time with them and know what's going on with their lives, or they don't have a lot of people in their home lives who can either provide a role model for them, or at least keep them from buying into the shit like Andrew Tate, etc. are selling.

[Incredulity 11,683]

6 hours ago, atomheartbevo said:

As mentioned earlier, they are going down Internet rabbit holes where nobody is challenging them.  25 years ago, if these people were spouting off insane bullshit about conspiracy theories that they were a victim of or whatever, a parent or sibling or other relative or friend or classmate would usually set them straight, or at the very least, they'd see the people around them not following the stupid bullshit they are pushing. And truthfully, some of that pushback would be basically bullying, as in "you're a fucking idiot for believing that, just lower your standards and go get laid you moron".

The writers at the Simpsons didn’t conjure Comic Book Guy out of thin air 30 years ago.  Are there more of them, or are they just more visible with social media/internet?  

[Al_4_ISU 12,485]

9 hours ago, Da Fino said:

I was referring to her being mistaken and overreacting when she thought that someone was shooting loads under her dinner table. Take it easy. 

My opinion is that said overreaction was as a result of Catholic repression and using it as an example of how deep and powerful that shit can be.

[atomheartbevo 89,799]

2 hours ago, Incredulity said:

The writers at the Simpsons didn’t conjure Comic Book Guy out of thin air 30 years ago.  Are there more of them, or are they just more visible with social media/internet?  

We’ve added 80 million people since 1990, so both?

[Samson's Wig 3,194]

17 hours ago, chainsaw said:

Internet makes it possible to talk to multiple women simultaneously.

You could do that before the Internet, too.

[chainsaw 9,873]

41 minutes ago, Samson's Wig said:

You could do that before the Internet, too.

How

[Goredho 17,420]

6 hours ago, Incredulity said:

The writers at the Simpsons didn’t conjure Comic Book Guy out of thin air 30 years ago.  Are there more of them, or are they just more visible with social media/internet?  

I think what the internet and social media allows is for them to form groups, become organized, and be collectively influenced by agitators to take action.

Comic book guy used to just sit in his room geeking out over comics.  Maybe he was friends with a couple other comic book nerds.  They might be like, "Damn, I wish I could get laid."  But that's where it kind of stopped.

Now you have large pods of comic book guys coalescing into groups online.  Those groups have overlap.  And as the people in these online communities get to talking, they start to wonder wtf they aren't all getting Batman level's of pussy.  It becomes an echo chamber of sexual disenfranchisement.  At that point, they are ripe for conversion from being a support group of sexually frustrated geeks to being a motivated force for taking action and striking out against their perceived nemesis.  It just takes the right messaging and view of events to set them off.

That's a pattern happening with conspiracy theorists, racists, incels, anti-vaxxers, environmentalists, BLM, #metoo and other groups.  Some of them are righteous causes that have been corrupted or coopted, either wholly or in specific instances.  Collectively, its all leading to a growing sense of societal malaise and erosion of faith in our institutions and each other.  Its a problem that no one is effectively combatting, maybe not even trying.  Efforts seem more focused on adding groups of angry, scared and motivated followers to your political tribe.

[Brisketexan 105,337]

4 minutes ago, Goredho said:

I think what the internet and social media allows is for them to form groups, become organized, and be collectively influenced by agitators to take action.

Comic book guy used to just sit in his room geeking out over comics.  Maybe he was friends with a couple other comic book nerds.  They might be like, "Damn, I wish I could get laid."  But that's where it kind of stopped.

Now you have large pods of comic book guys coalescing into groups online.  Those groups have overlap.  And as the people in these online communities get to talking, they start to wonder wtf they aren't all getting Batman level's of pussy.  It becomes an echo chamber of sexual disenfranchisement.  At that point, they are ripe for conversion from being a support group of sexually frustrated geeks to being a motivated force for taking action and striking out against their perceived nemesis.  It just takes the right messaging and view of events to set them off.

That's a pattern happening with conspiracy theorists, racists, incels, anti-vaxxers, environmentalists, BLM, #metoo and other groups.  Some of them are righteous causes that have been corrupted or coopted, either wholly or in specific instances.  Collectively, its all leading to a growing sense of societal malaise and erosion of faith in our institutions and each other.  Its a problem that no one is effectively combatting, maybe not even trying.  Efforts seem more focused on adding groups of angry, scared and motivated followers to your political tribe.

Fantastic post.

 

I'll add that back when these guys HAD to have some level of normal social interaction (they couldn't just hide in their little caves/online worlds), they were exposed to some social pressure like "maybe, dude, you could dress a little better -- see how we dress -- and you'd have better luck with the ladies.  It helped the dorks become a bit more normal.  Now, they can just stay and wallow in their dorkdom.

Edited May 3 by Brisketexan

[Txangel9910 217]

23 hours ago, Aqua Buddha said:

I would not get serious with a woman with a low body count unless she had a LONG stretch of a long term relationship.  If she's 35 or something, never been married, and been with like 3 people, hard pass.  

Why not?  She could have a list of things she wants to try but wants to feel safe with a partner before letting her freak flag fly...hypothetically speaking...and she hasn't found him yet.

[Aqua Buddha 14,610]

15 minutes ago, Txangel9910 said:

Why not?  She could have a list of things she wants to try but wants to feel safe with a partner before letting her freak flag fly...hypothetically speaking...and she hasn't found him yet.

Or she has issues with sex.....

[Helobious 9,464]

8 minutes ago, Aqua Buddha said:

Or she has issues with sex.....

That’s a pretty toxic/stupid mindset. Just because someone doesn’t feel the need to have 30+ sexual partners in their lifetime doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with them. 

[F250 28,818]

3 minutes ago, Txangel9910 said:

Why not?  She could have a list of things she wants to try but wants to feel safe with a partner before letting her freak flag fly...hypothetically speaking...and she hasn't found him yet.

Aqua Buddha might be on to something. During my post-divorce dating, some of the blandest sex I had were with women coming out of long term marriages and had very limited partners. A couple of women were open to new things but they were neither new nor things.

[Helobious 9,464]

4 minutes ago, F250 said:

Aqua Buddha might be on to something. During my post-divorce dating, some of the blandest sex I had were with women coming out of long term marriages and had very limited partners. A couple of women were open to new things but they were neither new nor things.

You guys sound desperate for STDs and for opening yourselves up to sexual assault allegations (I see it as the more partners I have, the higher the odds I run into a crazy one that could make up an allegation about me). Not worth the risk at all. 
 

I really don’t feel like I’ve missed out on anything by not having someone ever ask me to cum on their eggs benedict. But you do you. 

[Goredho 17,420]

6 minutes ago, Helobious said:

You guys sound desperate for STDs and for opening yourselves up to sexual assault allegations (I see it as the more partners I have, the higher the odds I run into a crazy one that could make up an allegation about me). Not worth the risk at all. 
 

I really don’t feel like I’ve missed out on anything by not having someone ever ask me to cum on their eggs benedict. But you do you. 

tl;dr @F250 is the Harvey Weinstein of Surlyhorns and has AIDS.

[Brisketexan 105,337]

7 minutes ago, Helobious said:

I really don’t feel like I’ve missed out on anything by not having someone ever ask me to cum on their eggs benedict. But you do you. 

What kind of sick bitch would want to skip out on hollandaise in favor of ANYTHING else?  See, I'd be out just because I can't handle being with a gal who doesn't appreciate the good things in life.

[Samson's Wig 3,194]

1 hour ago, chainsaw said:

How

In person, how else?  If you played your cards right, and with a little luck, you might even get more than one of them naked simultaneously as well.

[F250 28,818]

19 minutes ago, Helobious said:

You guys sound desperate for STDs and for opening yourselves up to sexual assault allegations (I see it as the more partners I have, the higher the odds I run into a crazy one that could make up an allegation about me). Not worth the risk at all. 
 

I really don’t feel like I’ve missed out on anything by not having someone ever ask me to cum on their eggs benedict. But you do you. 

To be fair, you're the Surly village idiot.

[chainsaw 9,873]

19 minutes ago, Samson's Wig said:

In person, how else?  If you played your cards right, and with a little luck, you might even get more than one of them naked simultaneously as well.

By simultaneous I mean simultaneous. I seen guys with multiple monitors up, 8-12 chat windows, sometimes even spreadsheets to keep track of their progress. Not dissimilar to a boiler room.

[Samson's Wig 3,194]

11 minutes ago, chainsaw said:

By simultaneous I mean simultaneous. I seen guys with multiple monitors up, 8-12 chat windows, sometimes even spreadsheets to keep track of their progress. Not dissimilar to a boiler room.

Yeah.  I meant simultaneous as in simultaneous as well.  The best way to flirt with one woman is to flirt with all the women in the room.  I have no doubt there are guys communicating online in the manner you describe, but that's creepy as shit and likely has a success rate barely above zero.  Life is for the living, and communion with others (whether sex driven or not) is kind of the point of why we're here.  I'm not sure I would count what you're describing as living.  Whatever blows their skirt up, I guess, but the thought of anyone doing that makes me feel sad for them.

[chainsaw 9,873]

3 minutes ago, Samson's Wig said:

creepy as shit

yes

3 minutes ago, Samson's Wig said:

success rate barely above zero

he averaged like 3 new bodies per week.

To be clear, even back then I thought there was something wrong with him along the lines of sex addiction.

Edited May 3 by chainsaw

[DixonHur 11,376]

1 hour ago, Helobious said:

That’s a pretty toxic/stupid mindset. Just because someone doesn’t feel the need to have 30+ sexual partners in their lifetime doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with them. 

[Samson's Wig 3,194]

10 minutes ago, chainsaw said:

yes

he averaged like 3 new bodies per week.

To be clear, even back then I thought there was something wrong with him along the lines of sex addiction.

There was definitely something wrong with him, but how he managed that level of success communicating predominantly online is rather astounding (and sad for all parties involved). 

[Aqua Buddha 14,610]

Barring a long term relationship, if you’ve been sexually active for 15 years and been with 3 people, you’re putting pussy on a pedestal or dick on display.  Either that, or you have a low sex drive.

Hard pass all around.

[CHIEF 5,095]

2 hours ago, Brisketexan said:

Fantastic post.

 

I'll add that back when these guys HAD to have some level of normal social interaction (they couldn't just hide in their little caves/online worlds), they were exposed to some social pressure like "maybe, dude, you could dress a little better -- see how we dress -- and you'd have better luck with the ladies.  It helped the dorks become a bit more normal.  Now, they can just stay and wallow in their dorkdom.

Exactly. CHIEF Jr., being an engineer, would probably have some intel tendencies if we let him. One rule we set after graduation is that he was not to work from home. He needed to be in an office setting, and go in daily to interact face to face with people. Sit across from people and solve problems. That is how the real world works. He is not a sharp dresser until he needs or wants to be. That shit had to stop. Go into the office dressed nice, properly groomed, and with a good attitude. That is the way young adults are supposed to learn to be on time, meet deadlines,  build comradery and maturity. Working from home is for those old and mature enough to manage their time and stay on schedule. The office is also where you meet women, not necessarily one for a romantic relationship, but many want to hook up a friend, niece, daughter, or granddaughter with a successful young man that is sharp, educated, dresses nice, and is groomed properly.

So far all of this has worked. One of my son's graduation presents was that we would pay for Lasik anytime he wanted it. He gets it next Thursday, along with an "old school" barbershop trip. He has a standing appointment every three weeks, his hair grows like crazy. We have a wedding reception for one of his friends, his wife is gorgeous, as are most of her friends. He wants to look good to "shoot his shot".

CHIEF

 

[Brisketexan 105,337]

3 minutes ago, CHIEF said:

Exactly. CHIEF Jr., being an engineer, would probably have some intel tendencies if we let him.

Shit, I think that a LOT of guys of intelligence might.  There's a lot that's attractive about staying at home, goofing around on your computer, reading books, whatever it might be (I had to fight those tendencies myself.  Fortunately, the cold hard fact of "yeah, but all the girls are OUT THERE" motivated the shit outta me to get out there myself).

I lived in Moore Hill my freshman year.  Was at least acquainted with most of the guys on my hall.  When I was heading home for Xmas break, was taking my time packing my car, and walking the halls.  Stopped by one of the rooms with the door open, maybe 8-10 of the residents were in there.  A few guys were playing some computer game, a couple more were drinking some cheap beer.  I hung out in the doorway, shot the shit for a moment.  One of the guys turns around and asks "hey Brisket...we hang out like this all the time, like every weekend.  How come you never come down and hang out with us?"  I remember saying out loud something to the effect of "dude....have you been outside [waving to the entire UT campus all around us]?  That's where all the girls are.  It's FULL of girls.  That's where I am on the weekends, why aren't y'all out there?"  Got a shrug.  But FFS, sure, it's fun sitting in a room playing some game, drinking beer with your buddies and laughing at fart jokes.  Nothing wrong with doing it some time.  But sticking with that safe place instead of putting yourself into an environment that 99% of the straight men on earth would have killed to be in?  Fuck that noise.

[Nivek 16,986]

42 minutes ago, Aqua Buddha said:

Barring a long term relationship, if you’ve been sexually active for 15 years and been with 3 people, you’re putting pussy on a pedestal or dick on display.  Either that, or you have a low sex drive.

Hard pass all around.

Aqua Buddha at lunch

[Rimbo 26,111]

1 hour ago, Aqua Buddha said:

Barring a long term relationship, if you’ve been sexually active for 15 years and been with 3 people, you’re putting pussy on a pedestal or dick on display.  Either that, or you have a low sex drive.

Hard pass all around.

[Helobious 9,464]

56 minutes ago, CHIEF said:

One rule we set after graduation is that he was not to work from home. He needed to be in an office setting, and go in daily to interact face to face with people. Sit across from people and solve problems. That is how the real world works. He is not a sharp dresser until he needs or wants to be. That shit had to stop. Go into the office dressed nice, properly groomed, and with a good attitude. That is the way young adults are supposed to learn to be on time, meet deadlines,  build comradery and maturity. Working from home is for those old and mature enough to manage their time and stay on schedule. The office is also where you meet women, not necessarily one for a romantic relationship, but many want to hook up a friend, niece, daughter, or granddaughter with a successful young man that is sharp, educated, dresses nice, and is groomed properly.

 

 

Not kidding, I once had sex while I was supposed to be working from home with a girl I had met on a dating app. But I hope your son’s expensive clothes and haircuts are working out for him. 

[CHIEF 5,095]

Clothes don’t have to be expensive. Just nice golf shirt, pressed jeans, and proper footwear. Not shorts, a stained t-shirt, and flip flops which tends to be his attire when not working or going clubbing. 
 

CHIEF

[F250 28,818]

25 minutes ago, CHIEF said:

Clothes don’t have to be expensive. Just nice golf shirt, pressed jeans, and proper footwear.

This sounds like dad attire.

 

Edited May 3 by F250

[HornOnTheBayou 8,946]

4 hours ago, CHIEF said:

Exactly. CHIEF Jr., being an engineer, would probably have some intel tendencies if we let him. One rule we set after graduation is that he was not to work from home. He needed to be in an office setting, and go in daily to interact face to face with people. Sit across from people and solve problems. That is how the real world works. He is not a sharp dresser until he needs or wants to be. That shit had to stop. Go into the office dressed nice, properly groomed, and with a good attitude. That is the way young adults are supposed to learn to be on time, meet deadlines,  build comradery and maturity. Working from home is for those old and mature enough to manage their time and stay on schedule. The office is also where you meet women, not necessarily one for a romantic relationship, but many want to hook up a friend, niece, daughter, or granddaughter with a successful young man that is sharp, educated, dresses nice, and is groomed properly.

So far all of this has worked. One of my son's graduation presents was that we would pay for Lasik anytime he wanted it. He gets it next Thursday, along with an "old school" barbershop trip. He has a standing appointment every three weeks, his hair grows like crazy. We have a wedding reception for one of his friends, his wife is gorgeous, as are most of her friends. He wants to look good to "shoot his shot".

CHIEF

 

A rule after graduation?

[Helobious 9,464]

Women fawn over men that still follow rules set for them by their parents after college graduation.  

[immamac 43,049]

9 minutes ago, Helobious said:

Women fawn over men that still follow rules set for them by their parents after college graduation.  

Well he lived at their house. 

[Helobious 9,464]

I’m not criticizing him for helping out his son. But he talks down on incel-type men while describing all the things he did to help out his son socially, not considering the fact that millions of young people don’t have that level of parental support or guidance. When I was a teen and young adult I had no father around to ask about how to dress nice or to push me in school or to be sociable or what to do on a date. 

[DixonHur 11,376]

4 hours ago, Helobious said:

I once had sex while I was supposed to be working from home with a girl I had met on a dating app

Also, true story, I once had sex while I was supposed to be working in my office with a girl I had met at work.

She was a temp (but eventually hired on full time) and we're still friends...but she's married now, and her husband knows all about it.

Edited May 4 by DixonHur
Specifically, I met her in the breakroom

[MAUFRAIS 6,634]

A tramp?

[F250 28,818]

2 hours ago, immamac said:

Well he lived at their house. 

I was a little confused by the rules thing myself but I figured it was a "if you are going to live under my roof there are some rules; no drugs, parties, sex or working from home" which is fair.

The no WFH thing is a bit controlling if it is about shaping behavior and not because it's a small house or something like that.

[troph 24,906]

8 hours ago, Aqua Buddha said:

Barring a long term relationship, if you’ve been sexually active for 15 years and been with 3 people, you’re putting pussy on a pedestal or dick on display.  Either that, or you have a low sex drive.

Hard pass all around.

If you’ve been sexually active for 15 years and haven’t been in a long term relationship such that you have a lower body count then… hard pass. 

[F250 28,818]

If you are concerned with a woman's number of sex partners, particularly if they are too high, you are likely an incel or a misogynistic red piller.