Dallas Cowboys 2024 Season Thread -- Jerrah the Asshat Rides Again

[BurntOrange&White 39606]

 

[Pato del Muerto 52338]

That’s amazing. All of it is, really.  Bring on Deion and shadeur. Bring on the hilariously imbalanced trade that would take to move dak.  The loonier the better.  It’s the only reason I keep watching. 

[mdmost 42841]

Maybe it’s so Jerry the Vampire doesn’t burn up when the sun touches his skin.

[HRSchenker 2259]

[gofuckyourself 8121]

I miss Tom Laundry.

Text Schramm too.

[futureman 22414]

45 minutes ago, Pato del Muerto said:

Bring on the hilariously imbalanced trade that would take to move dak.

pretty sure dak would have to agree to something. 

[Blotto 23427]

10 minutes ago, gofuckyourself said:

I miss Tom Laundry.

Text Schramm too.

None of it would have been possible without Roger Starbucks

[Js1 85095]

50 minutes ago, HRSchenker said:

Ah yes, Tom Laundry Middle School in Aurlen, Texas.

Go Lounghourns! 

[dcar00 14030]

1 hour ago, Pato del Muerto said:

That’s amazing. All of it is, really.  Bring on Deion and shadeur. Bring on the hilariously imbalanced trade that would take to move dak.  The loonier the better.  It’s the only reason I keep watching. 

hire Deion.  team with #1 pick takes Shadeur.  We trade 3 #1's and 2 #2's to get him.  We trade Dak for a 4th and 5th in 2026, a 6th in 2030, new curtains, and 5 new Surface tablets to replace the 5 McCarthy is going to break watching Rush and Lance finish out this season.

[Pato del Muerto 52338]

1 minute ago, dcar00 said:

hire Deion.  team with #1 pick takes Shadeur.  We trade 3 #1's and 2 #2's to get him.  We trade Dak for a 4th and 5th in 2026, a 6th in 2030, new curtains, and 5 new Surface tablets to replace the 5 McCarthy is going to break watching Rush and Lance finish out this season.

Pretty sure we’d have to give draft picks to coax any team to take on dak’s contract. 

[Jshep34 2304]

I feel bad for the true life long cowboys fans here. Once a proud nfl franchise that was what all teams wanted to be are now just a joke due to 1 man's belief in himself.

[Rex Kramer 1301]

9 hours ago, Ghost of LL said:

I think the real answer is that he wanted it on an axis to open onto The Ballpark in Arlington.  Jerry wanted his stadium and its big glass wall to glower down on the perpetually cellar-dwelling Rangers.

Weird thought. It’s all to maximize parking. Pretty well known. 

[General Colt 119]

10 hours ago, dcar00 said:

I wonder if the trophy he is talking about is the famous Divisional Playoff Round trophy. 

[DixonHur 11168]

2 hours ago, dcar00 said:

hire Deion.  team with #1 pick takes Shadeur.  We trade 3 #1's and 2 #2's to get him.  We trade Dak for a 4th and 5th in 2026, a 6th in 2030, new curtains, and 5 new Surface tablets to replace the 5 McCarthy is going to break watching Rush and Lance finish out this season.

 

2 hours ago, Pato del Muerto said:

Pretty sure we’d have to give draft picks to coax any team to take on dak’s contract. 

Dak's contract has a no-trade clause, so good luck Jerrah.

The only hope is that Dak wants out of Dallas

[Patrick Bateman 3903]

3 hours ago, DixonHur said:

 

Dak's contract has a no-trade clause, so good luck Jerrah.

The only hope is that Dak wants out of Dallas

Gotta think the first poster was kidding.... Dak's not going anywhere, his cap hit to trade him would like 80m or more.  He's here for two more years minimum and most likely 3.  In fact, they're going to have to restructure him next year to get some cap savings, which was always the plan with his contract so it's not some secret.

If you're plan is to trade Dak next year, you don't understand the economics of the NFL.  These people would be better going out and firing up Madden and let the adults talk.  This is all beyond his no-trade clause.

The best they can do is to fire the entire staff and look for a young, innovative offensive mind and hope they hit on him and his staff.  Then draft BPA (depends on where you end up) and then spend in UFA to sure up some non-sexy positions -- LB, Safety, 3 CB, DT, OL, RB, Punter -- whatever they don't take in the first 100 picks.  The problem for the Cowboys is they have no depth.  This is a function of poor personnel decisions.  Will McClay gets credit for some draft picks, but if you look closely, the last 5 years has been..... meh.  Eliminate this year because too soon to judge, the last 4 years has produced several stars, but that's not much after.  We don't draft contributors much.  We're really boom or bust.

2020-- Lamb and Diggs.  Biadasz was a good pick but no longer with the team.  No one else contributed much.

2021 -- Micah and Osa.  No other real contributors on the team.  They had 11 picks.

2022 -- Ty Smith, Sam Williams (TBD), Tolbert (meh), Ferg (nice), Bland (hit), Damone Clark (meh) -- Pretty good if Sam Williams can come back and do anything and they can resign Bland.

2023 - Pretty much an all-time shitty draft.  Overshown.  That's probably it.  Maybe Asim Richards is something or good depth but we wasted every other fucking pick. 

The lack of depth and solid contributors is pretty stunning.  Yes, McClay should get credit for drafting stars like Lamb, Parson, and Diggs but it's really boom or bust with him lately.  And for the record, 2019 wasn't that great a draft either.  If you don't do shit in free agency, then frankly, you have to draft better.

 

 

[Texzilla58 4717]

12 hours ago, DixonHur said:

 

Dak's contract has a no-trade clause, so good luck Jerrah.

The only hope is that Dak wants out of Dallas

Dak’s contract, with void years, is likely to extend into 2031 or so, and that’s if Jerry doesn’t give another contract after this one. It’s devastating to the team.  It is stupid and devastating.  And this injury will make it more so.

i thought earlier maybe a little sanity had arrived after last January.  New coaching staff.  Dak gone.  Trade Micah for picks and dumping some bad contracts.  Total rebuild for 25.  The team is fucked with the Dak contract as it squishes all that.  It’s a fucking fungus that cannot be overcome.  
 

they need to prep for disaster.  Dak might end up more fucked up. Draft a QB high and use that cheap contract.  

Edited Tuesday at 02:18 PM by Texzilla58

[Trey3216 15325]

16 hours ago, Blotto said:

None of it would have been possible without Roger Starbucks

And the swift running of Tony Boar'sHead  

[DixonHur 11168]

9 hours ago, Patrick Bateman said:

Gotta think the first poster was kidding.... Dak's not going anywhere, his cap hit to trade him would like 80m or more.  He's here for two more years minimum and most likely 3.  In fact, they're going to have to restructure him next year to get some cap savings, which was always the plan with his contract so it's not some secret.

If you're plan is to trade Dak next year, you don't understand the economics of the NFL.  These people would be better going out and firing up Madden and let the adults talk.  This is all beyond his no-trade clause.

The best they can do is to fire the entire staff and look for a young, innovative offensive mind and hope they hit on him and his staff.  Then draft BPA (depends on where you end up) and then spend in UFA to sure up some non-sexy positions -- LB, Safety, 3 CB, DT, OL, RB, Punter -- whatever they don't take in the first 100 picks.  The problem for the Cowboys is they have no depth.  This is a function of poor personnel decisions.  Will McClay gets credit for some draft picks, but if you look closely, the last 5 years has been..... meh.  Eliminate this year because too soon to judge, the last 4 years has produced several stars, but that's not much after.  We don't draft contributors much.  We're really boom or bust.

2020-- Lamb and Diggs.  Biadasz was a good pick but no longer with the team.  No one else contributed much.

2021 -- Micah and Osa.  No other real contributors on the team.  They had 11 picks.

2022 -- Ty Smith, Sam Williams (TBD), Tolbert (meh), Ferg (nice), Bland (hit), Damone Clark (meh) -- Pretty good if Sam Williams can come back and do anything and they can resign Bland.

2023 - Pretty much an all-time shitty draft.  Overshown.  That's probably it.  Maybe Asim Richards is something or good depth but we wasted every other fucking pick. 

The lack of depth and solid contributors is pretty stunning.  Yes, McClay should get credit for drafting stars like Lamb, Parson, and Diggs but it's really boom or bust with him lately.  And for the record, 2019 wasn't that great a draft either.  If you don't do shit in free agency, then frankly, you have to draft better.

 

 

I can't imagine any decent coaches, or FAs would want any part of this dumpster fire, and if Micah's smart he'll GTFO too.

Jerrah has shown his ass one too many times.  

[TornACL 7675]

Can't believe no one in the 80s ever opened up a dry cleaning place named Tom Laundry.  Huge missed opportunity there.

[C-Man 27035]

15 hours ago, Rex Kramer said:

Weird thought. It’s all to maximize parking. Pretty well known. 

I thought it was because if it faced north-south Jerryworld would've given you a view of the Walmart that's right there.

 

10 hours ago, Patrick Bateman said:

Gotta think the first poster was kidding.... Dak's not going anywhere, his cap hit to trade him would like 80m or more.  He's here for two more years minimum and most likely 3.  In fact, they're going to have to restructure him next year to get some cap savings, which was always the plan with his contract so it's not some secret.

If you're plan is to trade Dak next year, you don't understand the economics of the NFL.  These people would be better going out and firing up Madden and let the adults talk.  This is all beyond his no-trade clause.

The best they can do is to fire the entire staff and look for a young, innovative offensive mind and hope they hit on him and his staff.  Then draft BPA (depends on where you end up) and then spend in UFA to sure up some non-sexy positions -- LB, Safety, 3 CB, DT, OL, RB, Punter -- whatever they don't take in the first 100 picks.  The problem for the Cowboys is they have no depth.  This is a function of poor personnel decisions.  Will McClay gets credit for some draft picks, but if you look closely, the last 5 years has been..... meh.  Eliminate this year because too soon to judge, the last 4 years has produced several stars, but that's not much after.  We don't draft contributors much.  We're really boom or bust.

2020-- Lamb and Diggs.  Biadasz was a good pick but no longer with the team.  No one else contributed much.

2021 -- Micah and Osa.  No other real contributors on the team.  They had 11 picks.

2022 -- Ty Smith, Sam Williams (TBD), Tolbert (meh), Ferg (nice), Bland (hit), Damone Clark (meh) -- Pretty good if Sam Williams can come back and do anything and they can resign Bland.

2023 - Pretty much an all-time shitty draft.  Overshown.  That's probably it.  Maybe Asim Richards is something or good depth but we wasted every other fucking pick. 

The lack of depth and solid contributors is pretty stunning.  Yes, McClay should get credit for drafting stars like Lamb, Parson, and Diggs but it's really boom or bust with him lately.  And for the record, 2019 wasn't that great a draft either.  If you don't do shit in free agency, then frankly, you have to draft better.

 

 

The Cowboys have never really done much in the later rounds, not in the post-Jimmy years. At least it seems that way.

[Trey3216 15325]

2 hours ago, C-Man said:

I thought it was because if it faced north-south Jerryworld would've given you a view of the Walmart that's right there.

 

The Cowboys have never really done much in the later rounds, not in the post-Jimmy years. At least it seems that way.

In the 2005-2015 era, they got a bunch of really solid players in the later rounds.  A whole bunch  

[threesheets 1652]

21 hours ago, HRSchenker said:

Because of course the sold a sponsorship for that.

[Tired Horn 734]

On 11/11/2024 at 2:19 PM, Pato del Muerto said:

That’s amazing. All of it is, really.  Bring on Deion and shadeur. Bring on the hilariously imbalanced trade that would take to move dak.  The loonier the better.  It’s the only reason I keep watching. 

I think Jerry could cement his legacy by trading Dak for Daniel Jones. As an added bonus, he could keep the corpse of Ezekiel Elliott as the starting RB.

What a stoppable force those two would be,

[DixonHur 11168]

Lol

[DougO 5239]

 

[futureman 22414]

yeah he was good in college.  lots of guys are. 

[Pam Cummings 9567]

9 hours ago, DixonHur said:

Lol

I don't get how you can say this isn't a disadvantage for your team. You play 9 home games every year. 9 times of potentially dealing with it versus just once for any given opponent. The Eagles, Commanders, and Giants aren't out there willingly playing home games blind.

[RPM 26213]

3 hours ago, Pam Cummings said:

I don't get how you can say this isn't a disadvantage for your team.

Oh yeah? What about the fuckin' moon? Why aren't people bitching about that? /Jerrah

[Eskimohorn 5613]

I don't get how you can say this isn't a disadvantage for your team. You play 9 home games every year. 9 times of potentially dealing with it versus just once for any given opponent. The Eagles, Commanders, and Giants aren't out there willingly playing home games blind.

He thinks they know the intricacies of the sunlight there and gives them an advantage. Like Heinz Field’s shitty turf, where they know what cleats to wear and have kickers used to it.

The owners should dictate that he cover it for tv, player safety, and fan experience. It’s a disgrace.

[dcar00 14030]

6 minutes ago, Eskimohorn said:

He thinks they know the intricacies of the sunlight there and gives them an advantage. Like Heinz Field’s shitty turf, where they know what cleats to wear and have kickers used to it.

The owners should dictate that he cover it for tv, player safety, and fan experience. It’s a disgrace.

The NFL should force the cowboys to play all home games at 3PM window.

[AbeFroman 2110]

It's been 15 years.  Those who live in the area and follow the Cowboys have complained about this since day one, including the media.  

It's just now gaining national steam for some reason, I guess because of how piss-poor the Cowboys are right now so it's something else to point to.

 

But I can guarantee all of you who are just jumping on this now... That old man ain't changing shit, nada.

It wouldn't surprise me if he tore some shit down and put up more windows, just to dig his heels in.

[dcar00 14030]

15 hours ago, Pam Cummings said:

I don't get how you can say this isn't a disadvantage for your team. You play 9 home games every year. 9 times of potentially dealing with it versus just once for any given opponent. The Eagles, Commanders, and Giants aren't out there willingly playing home games blind.

you have a billion dollar domed stadium in which, at your home games, you should only need to consider to take the ball or defer at the coin flip.  Instead because your owner is a complete fucking idiot, your idiot coach now needs to consult a sun dial as well.

[BurntOrange&White 39606]

Why didn’t they just build the stadium in typical stadium orientation of N/S?

[Both Tacos 1805]

Why didn’t they just build the stadium in typical stadium orientation of N/S?

Same stupid logic of why they have Sky Mirror.

[futureman 22414]

20 minutes ago, BurntOrange&White said:

Why didn’t they just build the stadium in typical stadium orientation of N/S?

because you touch yourself at night.

 

 

 

it was an aesthetic and economic decision.

[hannawilliam 0]

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Edited 5 hours ago by hannawilliam

[DigglerontheHoof 21051]

9 hours ago, BurntOrange&White said:

Why didn’t they just build the stadium in typical stadium orientation of N/S?

 

I thought it was b/c of the underground infrastructure necessary to anchor the retractable roof (I'm sure I've seen/read that before) but after a quick search this is all I found.

 

https://stadiumdb.com/news/2017/10/texas_1billion_superstadium_with_sun_blinding_players

 

So when we were laying out the stadium one thing we wanted to do was make sure the end zones were completely open. It was one of the keys to making sure the stadium did something that no other stadium has ever done before or done since. It transforms from an indoor, 80,000-seat arena to what feels like an outdoor stadium.

"That's the reason the end zones are open and the orientation is the way it is because that's the absolute best alignment to play out the final master plan and in creating the most value in the land around the stadium itself.''

 

The cherry on top is that Jerry never allows the stadjum roof open during Cowboy games b/c the roof traps in noise and he wants the "home field" advantage.  Of course, when half the crowd is pulling for the opposition...

Edited 3 hours ago by DigglerontheHoof

[gofuckyourself 8121]

1 hour ago, hannawilliam said:

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Wrong thread spambot.

We're searching for someone to explain how anyone can willingly watch the Cowboys who isn't in fact attempting to euthanize themselves.

In the meantime, see my username.

[dcar00 14030]

This will be a good test for Stephen when Jerry dies. If he immediately puts up curtains maybe the franchise has a chance of not being the Cleveland Browns for the next 30 years.

[kevwun 15611]

I don't know what changed this year, but I am enjoying Jerry getting called out for all his bullshit finally.

[Js1 85095]

1 hour ago, gofuckyourself said:

Wrong thread spambot.

We're searching for someone to explain how anyone can willingly watch the Cowboys who isn't in fact attempting to euthanize themselves.

In the meantime, see my username.

Maybe Jerry uses that site for his draft strategy 

[gofuckyourself 8121]

33 minutes ago, kevwun said:

I don't know what changed this year, but I am enjoying Jerry getting called out for all his bullshit finally.

Yes. There was a point where people who closely followed the team, and longtime fans, recognized and discussed the idiocy and now the idiocy has become so glaringly obvious that no one, anywhere, can ignore it.

In other words, the amplifier of glaring idiocy has gone well past 11 and shows no sign of stopping there.

 

[gofuckyourself 8121]

39 minutes ago, Js1 said:

Maybe Jerry uses that site for his draft strategy 

And contract negotiations, free agent signings, stadium and window placement, window coverings interior design suggestions, etc.