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Dallas Cowboys 2024 Season Thread -- Jerrah the Asshat Rides Again


Patrick Bateman

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I became a fan in 1970, fucking diehard. I said I'd be done with the Cowboys if Jerry hired Campo and the next fucking day he did, Campo said yes sir Mr Jones sir at the press conference and all I could do was laugh.  I really haven't cared that much since so hire Deion, at least it would be  interesting.

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2 minutes ago, 'stache said:

I think somebody exists out there who could make it work but no way to know who it is and almost no chance of it actually happening. For example, Joe Brady would be a great hire, but he's the type of young innovative coach who has a bright future and knows better than to answer the phone for Jerry fucking Jones. 

They don't spend money correctly and make horrific trades.  There is no accountability for the GM position so the team basically has one hand tied behind it's back.  Short of lucking into a generational QB there is no recipe for a coach to overcome that.

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17 minutes ago, tbone_ said:

Seven head coaches since Jimmy Johnson. Not one of them has accomplished anything during or after their tenure as Cowboys coach.

Why anyone on the planet thinks this is a good job is completely beyond me.

It's a good job for coaches who want to get paid and break out their shine boxes early and often. 

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Don't leave Chan Gailey and Bum Phillips out of the conversation. Jerry Jones and the Dallas Cowboys have become the sports equivalent of an elephant graveyard for coaches. A few escaped, notably Sean Payton. Wouldn't be surprised if Jones approched him before his epic run with Drew Brees. That coulda been us. In fact, didn't the Cowboys have a shot at Brees and passed on him? In any case, I wouldn't be surprised if Payton told Jerry Thanks but no thanks.

Jerry will never spring for a proven Super Bowl caliber coach. Never. Best we can hope for is a budding kick ass motherfucker. That could be a Witten type, maybe, but sure as not that lightweight Deion. Fuck him. The one quality I want to see in this new coach is someone big enough and mean enough to scare the fuck outta his players.

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1 hour ago, Irish Wrist Watch said:

Don't leave Chan Gailey and Bum Phillips out of the conversation. Jerry Jones and the Dallas Cowboys have become the sports equivalent of an elephant graveyard for coaches. A few escaped, notably Sean Payton. Wouldn't be surprised if Jones approched him before his epic run with Drew Brees. That coulda been us. In fact, didn't the Cowboys have a shot at Brees and passed on him? In any case, I wouldn't be surprised if Payton told Jerry Thanks but no thanks.

Jerry will never spring for a proven Super Bowl caliber coach. Never. Best we can hope for is a budding kick ass motherfucker. That could be a Witten type, maybe, but sure as not that lightweight Deion. Fuck him. The one quality I want to see in this new coach is someone big enough and mean enough to scare the fuck outta his players.

Chan Gailey, forgot all about the first coach in Cowboys history to not win a Super Bowl.

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12 hours ago, Irish Wrist Watch said:

Don't leave Chan Gailey and Bum Phillips out of the conversation. Jerry Jones and the Dallas Cowboys have become the sports equivalent of an elephant graveyard for coaches. A few escaped, notably Sean Payton. Wouldn't be surprised if Jones approched him before his epic run with Drew Brees. That coulda been us. In fact, didn't the Cowboys have a shot at Brees and passed on him? In any case, I wouldn't be surprised if Payton told Jerry Thanks but no thanks.

Jerry will never spring for a proven Super Bowl caliber coach. Never. Best we can hope for is a budding kick ass motherfucker. That could be a Witten type, maybe, but sure as not that lightweight Deion. Fuck him. The one quality I want to see in this new coach is someone big enough and mean enough to scare the fuck outta his players.

I’ve seen him do it before.

 

also,

Sean Payton tried his damnedest to get Romo to New Orleans.

 

https://www.sbnation.com/nfl/2019/6/28/18681400/sean-payton-tony-romo-trade-saints-cowboys-drew-brees-what-if

 

 

Which do you think was more responsible for the success of those Saints teams? Payton or Brees?

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On 1/10/2025 at 9:51 AM, mdmost said:

 

 

 

I've been thinking this. Other teams kick the tires on fat Mike, look at tapes of some of his game management skills, and he's no longer a hot item, if he ever actually was. Or maybe Mike sees just how bad those other organizations are not looking like a better situation. 

Jerry may get his short term deal and kick the can down the road another year or two...or not.

Both options scare me. Keeping the same status quo vs. making another dumpsterfire hire.

I almost embrace mediocrity by now. Losing hope can do that.

 

 

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Look, yall need to resign yourselves that this team is cursed. The Red Sox had the “Curse of the Bambino”. The Cubs had the “Curse of the Billy Goat”. The Cowboys have “The Curse of the Hillbilly Owner”. 
 

Some of us are old enough to have lived through the creation of America’s Team and the success during the 70’s. We suffered a few years until Jimmy righted the ship. For those of you born in to Cowboys fandom after those glory years??? You’ll be the fans your grandchildren are at the cemetery drinking a celebratory beer next to your tombstone the next time the Cowboys win a Super Bowl. Sorry to have to be the one to break it to you.

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5 minutes ago, Hate said:

Look, yall need to resign yourselves that this team is cursed. The Red Sox had the “Curse of the Bambino”. The Cubs had the “Curse of the Billy Goat”. The Cowboys have “The Curse of the Hillbilly Owner”. 
 

Some of us are old enough to have lived through the creation of America’s Team and the success during the 70’s. We suffered a few years until Jimmy righted the ship. For those of you born in to Cowboys fandom after those glory years??? You’ll be the fans your grandchildren are at the cemetery drinking a celebratory beer next to your tombstone the next time the Cowboys win a Super Bowl. Sorry to have to be the one to break it to you.

Its Been A Long Time Waiting GIF

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15 hours ago, Duane Moore said:

Deion would be a three year train wreck that everyone would tune in to watch and would provide non-stop content for the sportstalk business. Might as well maximize revenue. 

Sure, because JJ damn sure doesn't care about winning. If he did, he would have fired the GM 20 years ago.

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45 minutes ago, TonyTexas said:

 

It's pure Rooney rule but that wouldn't be the worst hire.  His defenses have ALWAYS been good no matter how bad the offense is, and he never had a real QB when he was with the jets(rodgers was hurt or pretty much done).  If they find a good OC(big IF), they could do MUCH worse than Him.   

I'd rather him than some other old head(Rivera/Pederson ect...) retread honestly.

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28 minutes ago, kevwun said:

The defense would be solid under Saleh.  He's an over the top rah-rah guy, but he was the fall guy for Aaron Rodgers sucking.  They would have had a good team if he was even still half way good.

Pretty much...they had awful QB play and while you can overcome mid QB play in the NFL and still be decent(like Pittsburgh), you can't have awful play.

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2 hours ago, TrashMaster G said:

Sure, because JJ damn sure doesn't care about winning. If he did, he would have fired the GM 20 years ago.

so you want an owner that just sits there and writes checks and then questions nothing?......when has that ever worked......you agreed to the deal when Jerry bought the team and that was Jerry would be the GM! 😁

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17 hours ago, Irish Wrist Watch said:

Don't leave Chan Gailey and Bum Phillips out of the conversation. Jerry Jones and the Dallas Cowboys have become the sports equivalent of an elephant graveyard for coaches. A few escaped, notably Sean Payton. Wouldn't be surprised if Jones approched him before his epic run with Drew Brees. That coulda been us. In fact, didn't the Cowboys have a shot at Brees and passed on him? In any case, I wouldn't be surprised if Payton told Jerry Thanks but no thanks.

Jerry will never spring for a proven Super Bowl caliber coach. Never. Best we can hope for is a budding kick ass motherfucker. That could be a Witten type, maybe, but sure as not that lightweight Deion. Fuck him. The one quality I want to see in this new coach is someone big enough and mean enough to scare the fuck outta his players.

Don't disparage O.A. "Bum" Phillips by associating him with Dallas.  

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1 hour ago, Hate said:

Dallas is a clusterfuck of an organization. The Jets at least went to back to back AFC title games in recent memory…with Dirty Sanchez at QB. 

And today, even with the hand wringing, the cowboys, ON THE FIELD, are in a much better situation than the Jets when he was there.  It's why most have Dallas as the top landing spot(until you add in the off the field reasons it shouldn't be)

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So… I’m kinda surprised Joey Freshwater hasn’t been mentioned. 

But more than that, Ryan “Blackbeard” Day might be a decent fit with Jerry. They could make their own official hair and beard dye of the Dallas Cowboys thing. I’m kinda serious. They are going to suck, might as well hire Ryan Day to do us all comical favors. 

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