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Great Quotes

Rimbo

By Rimbo
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Rimbo

Rimbo 25911

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This thread is for the goofy, the profound, the odd. For quotes that helped you define your life; for quotes that were merely ridiculous in context. Enough blather, here we go.

Quote

I tell you, we are here on Earth to fart around, and don't let anybody tell you different.

--Kurt Vonnegut, A Man Without a Country

Quote

If you hide your ignorance, no one will hit you and you'll never learn.

--Ray Bradbury, Fahrenheit 451

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jimmyjazz

jimmyjazz 45889

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“Reader, suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.” 
― Mark Twain

Quote

“God created war so that Americans would learn geography.” 
― Mark Twain

Quote

“When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years.” 
― Mark Twain

 

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jimmyjazz

jimmyjazz 45889

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1 hour ago, Rimbo said:

Quoting either Vonnegut or Mark Twain is almost like cheating. Ambrose Bierce is definitely cheating.

Ah, I didn't realize the extent to which you were aiming for the profane, odd, or obscure.

Best quote I've heard about being born with a silver spoon in one's mouth (and it gets thrown around a lot lately):

Quote

He was born on 3rd base and thinks he hit a triple.

 

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Rimbo

Rimbo 25911

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22 minutes ago, jimmyjazz said:

Ah, I didn't realize the extent to which you were aiming for the profane, odd, or obscure.

Best quote I've heard about being born with a silver spoon in one's mouth (and it gets thrown around a lot lately):

 

Actually, no preference. Just... notable will do. I mean, I started this by quoting Vonnegut, so...

Born on 3rd base, and then he TOOTBLAN'd...

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TexasBeta

TexasBeta 1261

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“It is not the critic who counts: not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles or where the doer of deeds could have done better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly, who errs and comes up short again and again, because there is no effort without error or shortcoming, but who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, who spends himself for a worthy cause; who, at the best,knows, in the end, the triumph of high achievement, and who, at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who knew neither victory nor defeat."

Teddy Roosevelt

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TK421

TK421 29

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"The music business is a cruel and shallow money trench, a long plastic hallway where thieves and pimps run free, and good men die like dogs. There's also a negative side."

Feel free to replace “music business” with your chosen profession.

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Macanudo

Macanudo 12975

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Talk to me, Goose.

You're not going to be happy unless you're going Mach 2 with your hair on fire.

You'll get nothing and like it!

Hey everybody! We're all gonna get laid!

I love this plan! I'm excited to be a part of it! Let's do it!

Right. That's bad. Okay. Alright, important safety tip. Thanks Egon.

Human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together... mass hysteria!

Well it looks to me like the best part of you ran down the crack of your momma's ass and ended up as a brown stain on the mattress! 

Back off, man. I'm a scientist.

 What is your major malfunction numbnuts? Didn't mommy and daddy show you enough attention when you were a child?

Sir, Does this mean Ann Margret is not coming?

Joker...  I want you to get straight up to Phu Bai. Captain January will need all his people.

 

 

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Surly Bevo

Surly Bevo 24908

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Patriotism is supporting your country all the time, and your government when it deserves it - Mark Twain

I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly. - Winston Churchill
 

It don't make a shit - Super Bill Bradley

If it flies, floats or fucks...rent it - Various sources

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